View source for A Fish Called Sandy/transcript

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{{EpisodeTranscript}}
{{L|''[The episode starts with a pan to Bikini Bottom.]''}}
{{L|French Narrator|Ah, the ocean. So bustling with aquatic life. So... wet. ''[Sandy approaches from the distance]'' Ooh, Here comes one of the most elusive of sea creatures now: the squirrel.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[blowing with the bubblegum wrapper]''}}
{{L|Sandy|Howdy, SpongeBob. Uh, could you give me some feedback on this scientific paper I'm writing?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|I'd love to, Sandy.}}
{{L|Sandy|The ocean is permeated with a multitude of aquatic life, from the ammodytes hexapterus, to the asteroidea, and the porifera. Though the differences are ostensible, there is a plethora of similarities. SpongeBob? Are you alright?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[shivering]'' Your science paper... so cold. So d-d-didactic.}}
{{L|Sandy|Gosh, you reckon it's too heavy on the technical side?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|It doesn't sound like anything I experience living in this wonderful ocean. It doesn't capture the feel of a warm current in your face, or what kelp feels like between your toes. ''[removes his right shoe, and wiggles his toes between a piece of kelp. Sandy then tries to do the same, but her boot is in the way]'' I wish you can experience the ocean like I do. ''[continues playing with the gum wrapper, then Sandy rubs the side of her helmet]''}}
{{L|''[Bubble transition to SpongeBob walking over to Sandy's treedome.]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|So Sandy, what was it that you wanted to-}}
{{L|Sandy|You're just in time! Presenting my Fish-U-Up Machine! With this device, I'll swap out my squirrel DNA with fish DNA and then I'll be able to breathe water! Then I can study the ocean like y'all sea critters do, without my bulky old suit on! All thanks to the generous help of our handsome volunteer, Fred.}}
{{L|Fred|Wait, I thought I was getting a haircut.}}
{{L|Sandy|Boop that button, square dude!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[presses the button]'' Boop!}}
{{L|''[Lightning crackles all around, the fluid in Fred's capsule drains, and Fred's fish DNA is transferred to Sandy. Stock footage of squirrels and fish is shown through her eyes, followed by an animation of an atom. Her lungs shrivel up and gills form. Sandy gasps and falls out of her capsule, flopping on the ground.]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|It really worked! You have gills! Let's get you a breath of fresh water. ''[he and Sandy exit the treedome]'' Isn't the ocean grand? Let it flow through your gills. Huh? ''[notices Sandy is no longer holding his hand, turns around, and sees her holding her breath]'' Oh no. Sandy, trust in your gills. Breathe. ''[Sandy shakes her head "No," then her cheeks turn blue]''}}
{{L|Patrick|Hey, SpongeBob. Sandy forgot how to breathe, huh? It happens to me all the time. ''[slaps her on the back, causing her to take a deep breath]''}}
{{L|Sandy|Yeehaw! I'm a water breather! There's a lot I need to learn about the way of the fish.}}
{{L|Patrick|Yeah. ''[walks away]'' Like don't breathe the yellow water.}}
{{L|Sandy|Ew! ''[wags her tail with excitement]'' Now I feel more spry than a springtime pup! What should we do first, SpongeBob?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Might I suggest... everything? ''[he and Sandy laugh]''}}
{{L|''[Montage of SpongeBob and Sandy having fun. The two run under a red backdrop. Sandy is feeling some invertebrates but gets poked by a sea urchin. The two then run under a blue backdrop. They are at the flower meadow from "F.U.N."]''}}
{{L|Sandy|''[sniffs the flowers and sneezes]'' Achoo.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[does the same thing]'' Achoo!}}
{{L|Sandy|Huh? ''[she and SpongeBob laugh]''}}
{{L|''[Cut to SpongeBob, in red gear, and Sandy, in green gear, playing karate from "Karate Choppers." SpongeBob chops Sandy in the head. Sandy, with a black eye and a severed tooth, gives a thumbs up. Cut to the two making armpit fart noises as an incidental passes by. Cut to SpongeBob breathing through Squidward's home window and making his own face. Sandy does the same. Squidward, reading the newspaper, tries to peek at them but the two ran away. Patrick makes a frowned face of Squidward after breathing. SpongeBob and Sandy then run under a purple backdrop. The two are happily jumping on the hydrothermal vents as the air blows SpongeBob's head upwards separate from his pants, just like in "Valentine's Day." Cut to the two making sand angels, revealing Sandy's in a shape of a fish and SpongeBob's square-shaped. Cut to Sandy leaving the Port-O-Head, then she feels the kelp.]''}}
{{L|Sandy|Aah!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[tiptoeing, touches Sandy with a kelp leaf]''}}
{{L|Sandy|''[laughs as she is tickled]''}}
{{L|''[Cut to Sandy struggling to blow a bubble, which harmlessly drops to the sand. SpongeBob spins from his "technique" from "Bubblestand" and blows a bubble that covers Sandy and lifts her off the ground. Bubble transition to SpongeBob and Sandy at Jellyfish Fields.]''}}
{{L|Sandy|You were right. This grass feels so good on my paws. ''[a jellyfish stings her lower back]'' Yeowch! Those stings hurt extra without my diving suit on. It is kind of invigorating. ''[runs around, trying to get the jellyfish to sting her again, but they fly away]'' Come on! Sting me! Sting me! I'm right here! Bring it on!}}
{{L|''[The jellyfish cower in fear, and one throws its wallet at her. Sandy stares at it with a puzzled expression.]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Sandy, check this out! Feel the glory of Jellyfish Fields.}}
{{L|Sandy|It's beautiful! And the refractive sunlight feels so good on my bare fur.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|And just breathe in that current. ''[takes a deep breath, but hair flies in his mouth]'' Sandy, you're shedding. ''[gasps]'' And you got scales!}}
{{L|Sandy|Good golly, I am and I do! More of my new fish type attributes are making themselves known. I wonder what other fish traits I have. Maybe I got swimming skills!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|There's only one place to find out. ''[the scene cuts to Goo Lagoon. Sandy approaches the briny water's edge, then inhales and exhales]''}}
{{L|Sandy|Ah. Smell that salty waft.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Well, what are we waiting for, my fish friend?}}
{{L|Both|Cannonball!}}
{{L|''[They both splash into the water.]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Isn't it nice to sea creatures to take water, Sandy? ''[sees her floating facedown in front of him]'' Sandy! ''[goes to touch her, but it is just the rest of her fur]'' Huh? It's just her pelt I felt.}}
{{L|Sandy|Oh, SpongeBob.}}
{{L|''[SpongeBob looked and saw that Sandy is completely orange from head to tail, just like a real fish.]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Sandy! You're all scales.}}
{{L|Sandy|Well, look at that! I feel so free! I can glide through the waters like a greased pig! ''[her tummy rumbles]'' Uh, oh. Speaking of, I feel hungry. What do fish folk eat around these parts?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|You're in luck. Goo Lagoon has the best unlicensed beach vendors under the sea.}}
{{L|Sandy|Ya had me at unlicensed. ''[she and SpongeBob get out of the water]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Your finest fish flakes, my good man.}}
{{L|Chef|''[scoffs]'' Whatever.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Dig in.}}
{{L|Sandy|Oh, well, ain't that clever.}}
{{L|Patrick|You guys paying for your flakes? ''[scratches his head and dandruff flakes come off]'' Want some?}}
{{L|Sandy|Thanks, but I just ate. Besides, we need to head back. ''[walks away with SpongeBob]'' Being a fish is giving me all kinds of insights.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[nervously notices the fishhooks from "Hooky" as well as hearing a woman's scream] Just keep moving, Sandy. We'll get you home.}}
{{L|Sandy|What's gotten into you, SpongeBob? You're acting more skittish than a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs. ''[bumps into a hook]'' Those shiny hooks look delicious.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Sandy! No! ''[holds on to her tail]'' Sandy, stay away from those!}}
{{L|Sandy|But they're so inviting.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Sandy, don't take the bait! ''[she bites the hook, and gets reeled to the surface]'' Sandy!}}
{{L|Fisher|Come to papa! ''[reels Sandy up]'' Alright, now let's take a look at you. ''[Sandy appears hideous]'' Oh, goodness! ''[vomits]''}}
{{L|Sandy|Oh, you ain't no prize yourself, mister!}}
{{L|Fisher|''[throws Sandy back in the water]'' What are they dumping in the water around here!?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Sandy, you're safe. ''[comforts her]''}}
{{L|Sandy|Sorry, SpongeBob. I let my fish side get the better of me. ''[her tail turns into a fish tail]'' Uh oh...}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Wha? Sandy? ''[Sandy slowly started to transform into a monstrous Dunkleosteus-like fish]'' Ah! You over-scienced yourself! Let's get you back to your la- ''[nearly gets whacked by Sandy's fish tail and she swims away]'' Oh no! She's devolved! I gotta help her! Sandy, come back! ''[follows her]''}}
{{L|Gary|''[meowing in song of "Blow the Man Down" from "I Was a Teenage Gary" but gets attacked by Dunkleosteus Sandy]'' Meow!}}
{{L|''[Dunkleosteus Sandy chases Gary around SpongeBob's house until she traps him in the back.]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Sandy, leave Gary alone! ''[he sees her munching on Gary's shell]'' No, Gary!}}
{{L|Gary|Meow.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Gary, you're safe. But wait, what is Sandy eating? ''[notices that she is actually chewing on empty pudding cups]'' Pudding cups? Gary, have you been hoarding those in your shell again?}}
{{L|Gary|Meow, meow.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Wait a minute. Pudding, shell, home, dome. That's it! Maybe Sandy's hoarding antidotes back in her dome.}}
{{L|Gary|Meow.}}
{{L|''[Dunkleosteus Sandy continues to munch on the empty pudding cups. But when she sees SpongeBob more pudding cups, she swims towards him, but she gets caught in a cage. SpongeBob shoves her into the cage and locks it.]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Phew. We'll discuss this pudding thing later, young man.}}
{{L|Gary|Meow, meow...}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Whoa! Sandy, no! ''[gets hit in the face by Dunkleosteus Sandy while she is still in the cage]'' Ow! Ow! Sandy! Ow!  ''[the screen pans upward to the night sky]''}}
{{L|Narrator|Many miles later.}}
{{L|''[SpongeBob had arrived back at Sandy's house, completely exhausted. He goes into the treedome and dumps Dunkleosteus Sandy into the bathtub.]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[fills up the tub with water before searching for an antidote]'' Sandy's gotta have a remedy somewhere. Where is it, where is it? ''[pours bubble bath in the tub]'' There. Bubble bath. Sandy has been smelling a little fishy lately. And now, the re-evolution serum. ''[finds the serum outside]'' That's it! ''[takes the serum and pours it into the tub, causing Sandy to reverse her fishy transformation]''}}
{{L|Sandy|''[appears as a robot]'' Whoops. Too far. ''[twists her tail back to her normal squirrel self, a heavenly light shines at her]'' SpongeBob, ''[hugs him]'' you saved the day!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|I'm just glad everything's back to normal.}}
{{L|Sandy|Yeah, but I feel like we forgot something.}}
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Sandy both hear Fred grunting and look at him from above. Fred is now a giant squirrel.]''}}
{{L|Fred|My legs! My furry, furry legs! My furry legs!}}
{{L|''[Fred's voice gets deeper, as he begins destroying Sandy's treedome.]''}}
{{L|Sandy|Oh, right. Fred. I'll get the carrier...}}