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{{ITranscript}}
{{Transcript-cleanup}}
{{EpisodeTr
{{EpisodeTranscript}}
|title = A Friendly Game
{{L|''[SpongeBob's alarm rings, his house blows toward Squidward's house, Squidward wakes up in dread, sand hands then cover the house's ears, then SpongeBob, in brown plaid, poses for one second then runs to Patrick's house.]''}}
|titlecard = A Friendly Game.jpg
|seasonnumber = 8
|episodenumber = 155a
|airdate = [[March 26]], [[2011]]
}}
{{L|''[SpongeBob's alarm rings, his house blows toward Squidward's house, Squidward wakes up in dread, sand hands then cover the house's ears, then SpongeBob, in brown plaid, poses for one second then runs to Patrick's house]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick! Tee time, Patrick! Patrick! ''[cuts to Squidward]'' Tee time, Patrick! ''[cuts to Patrick's house]'' Patrick! Wake up!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick! Tee time, Patrick! Patrick! ''[cuts to Squidward]'' Tee time, Patrick! ''[cuts to Patrick's house]'' Patrick! Wake up!}}
{{L|Patrick|''[laughs]'' Ready to lose?Weather permitting,of course.''[There is a rumbling sound then storm clouds move in and start rain & thunder]''}}
{{L|Patrick|''[laughs]'' Ready to lose? Weather permitting, of course. ''[there is a rumbling sound then storm clouds move in and start rain and thunder]''}}
{{L|Spongebob|Aw,how are we supposed to golf in this this downpour?Our putters are
{{L|SpongeBob|Aw, how are we supposed to golf in this downpour? Our putters are getting waterlogged. ''[twists his putter]''}}
getting waterlogged.''[twist putter]''}}
{{L|Patrick|Dumb rain! Doesn't it know I'm the sheriff in these parts? ''[points to sky with his putter]'' Hey, rain! You better stop that! ''[gets shocked by lightning then screams. Cuts to Squidward grumbling in annoyance and covers his head with a blanket]''}}
{{L|Patrick|Dumb rain!Doesn't anybody know I'm the sheriff in these parts?''[points to sky with putter]'' Hey,rain!You better stop that! ''[Patrick gets shocked by lightning then screams. Cuts to Squidward grumbling & covers head with blanket]''}}
{{L|Patrick|''[continues screaming then gets burned to ashes]'' Aah!}}
{{L|Patrick|''[continues screaming then gets burned to ashes]''AAAAAAHHH!!!!!}}
{{L|Squidward|''[opens the window]'' If you two don't mind, could you keep it down to a low rumble?}}
{{L|Squidward|''[opens window]'' If you two don't mind,could you keep it down to a low rumble?}}
{{L|SpongeBob and Patrick|Sorry, Squidward.}}
{{L|Spongebob & Patrick|Sorry,Squidward.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|I guess we were just too upset about the rain and how...}}
{{L|Spongebob|I guess we were just to upset about the rain and how...}}
{{L|Squidward|Don't care. ''[closes the window, cuts to SpongeBob's house]''}}
{{L|Squidward|Don't care.''[closes window. cuts to Spongebob's house]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[sighs]'' I was really looking forward to a day of sportsmanship and male bonding. Thanks a lot, rain! ''[slams his fist onto the table and makes his golf ball ricochet off of the door then Gary into Gary's food bowl]'' Say, ''[raises his finger]'' that gives me an idea. ''[a Brief Construction Montage time card appears]''}}
{{L|Spongebob|''[sighs]'' I was really looking forward to a day of sportsmanship and male bonding.Thanks a lot,rain!''[slams fist onto table and makes golf ball ricochet off of door then Gary into Gary's bowl]''Hey,''[raises finger]'' that gives me an idea.''[card comes up saying:BRIEF CONSTRUCTION MONTAGE]''}}
{{L|French Narrator|What follows is a brief construction montage.}}
{{L|Man with French accent|What follows is a brief construction montage.}}
{{L|''[The montage shows SpongeBob and Patrick hammering on boards, ripping a sofa, pouring sand, drilling holes, filling holes with water, making holes, and taking Gary's shell off. The Brief Construction Montage time card reappears.]''}}
{{L|''[shows Spongebob and Patrick hammering on boards,ripping a sofa,pouring sand,drilling holes,filling holes with water,making holes,& taking Gary's shell off.cuts back to card]''}}
{{L|French Narrator|We hope you enjoyed this brief construction montage.}}
{{L|Man with French accent|We hope you enjoyed this brief construction montage.}}
{{L|''[Cuts to outside of house, with sounds and SpongeBob's house shaking. Cuts to inside of Squidward's house.]''}}
{{L|''[cuts to outside of house,with sounds and house shaking.cuts to inside of Squidward's house]''}}
{{L|Squidward|''[grumbles, then gets so angry as his sleep mask burns off, puts three pillows on a desk, ties them to his face with a rope, still hears them, then rips the pillows off and screams in a rage. He storms to SpongeBob's house with umbrella, cuts to inside, where SpongeBob and Patrick are constructing]'' Hey! Hello? Nitwit, morons. ''[Patrick accidentally hits Squidward with a hammer. At this point, he screams in anger and annoyance]''}}
{{L|Squidward|''[grumbles then gets so angry his sleep mask burns off. puts three pillows on a desk,ties them to his face with a rope,still hears them,then rips pillows off and screams. He walks to Spongebob's house with umbrella,cuts to inside,where spongebob and Patrick are constructing]'' Hey!Hello?!Nitwit morons.''[Patrick hits Squidward with a hammer,Squidward screams]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Oh, hi, Squidward. Up from your slumber, I see. Well, you're just in time to indulge in a friendly game of ''[shows course]'' indoor miniature golf!}}
{{L|Spongebob|Oh,hi,Squidward.Up from your slumber,I see.Well,you're just in time to endure in a friendly game of ''[shows course]'' indoor miniature golf!}}
{{L|Squidward|I will not indulge in anything friendly or otherwise with the likes of you two. And presently, I am heading back to enjoy a well-deserved morning nap.}}
{{L|Squidward|I will not endulge in anything friendlyor otherwise with the likes of you two!Presently,I am heading to enjoy a well-deserved morning nap!}}
{{L|Patrick|But we sculpted your likeness out of butter on hole five. ''[cuts to sculpture]''}}
{{L|Patrick|But we sculpted your likeness out of butter on hole five.''[cuts to sculpture]''}}
{{L|Squidward|''[irritated]'' I don't care! Listen up, I will not be woken from my nap again, and if I am, I'm gonna...}}
{{L|Squidward|Idon't care!Listen up,I will not be woken from my nap again,and if I am,I'm gonna}}
{{L|Patrick|Join us on the back nine?}}
{{L|Patrick|Join us on the back nine?}}
{{L|Squidward|Just don't let it happen again! Or else.''[leaves]''}}
{{L|Squidward|Just don't let it happen again! Or else. ''[angrily leaves]''}}
{{L|Spongebob|Let's get this game teed off.''[balls come out of his head,he catches them,places a ball and tee on grass]'' You're up first,my good man.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Let's get this game teed off. ''[balls come out of his head, he catches them, places a ball and tee on grass]'' You're up first, my good man.}}
{{L|''[Patrick stretches,yawns,stomps,ululates]''}}
{{L|''[Patrick stretches, yawns, stomps, ululates.]''}}
{{L|Squidward|Would you two KEEP IT DOWN?!}}
{{L|Squidward|I am warning you two, keep it down!}}
{{L|Spongebob|Better tone down the calisthenics,Patrick.Don't wanna upset Squidward.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Better tone down the calisthenics, Patrick. Don't wanna upset Squidward.}}
{{L|Patrick|Can't wait to lose,huh?''[aims,pulls back,and shoots. ball ricochets back to tee]'' NO!Ooh.If you would just let me finish my stretches,I wouldn't have missed my first shot!}}
{{L|Patrick|Can't wait to lose, huh? ''[aims, pulls back, and shoots. Ball rolls back to tee]'' No! Ooh. If you had just let me finish my stretches, I wouldn't have missed my first shot!}}
{{L|Spongebob|Oh,don't worry,Patrick,I'm sure you'll get the hang of it.''[places ball on tee]'' Besides,we're just playin' for fun,right?And back,and-''[makes it]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Oh, don't worry, Patrick, I'm sure you'll get the hang of it. ''[places ball on tee]'' Besides, we're just playin' for fun, right? And back, and- ''[makes it]''}}
•Patrick:Nice shot.(moves ball)
{{L|Patrick|Nice shot. ''[moves his ball]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|What are you doing?}}
•Spongebob:What are you doing?
{{L|Patrick|Moving my ball.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, you have to play it where it lands.}}
Patrick:Moving my ball.
{{L|Patrick|Fine. Have it your way. ''[moves the ball back to original place, shoots, makes it]'' Ready to give up?}}
 
{{L|''[Cuts to a hole.]''}}
Spongebob:Patrick,you have to play it where it lands.
{{L|Patrick|Ha! Let's see how you do against the windmill. You haven't got a chance.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|You know, Patrick, this is just a game.}}
Patrick:Fine.Have it your way.(moves ball back to original place,shoots,makes it)Ready to give up?
{{L|Patrick|Oh, it is just a game, which I am gonna win.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|I think you're missing the point. ''[aims, practice shots]''}}
(cuts to a hole)
{{L|Patrick|Speaking of m-m-missing! ''[SpongeBob shoots by accident, startled by Patrick]'' Ha! Gotta play it where it lands. Watch and learn, SquarePants. Watch and learn. ''[shoots and makes it]'' Yes! See if you can top that!}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|''[uneasily]'' Okay.}}
Patrick:Ha!Let's see how you do against the windmill.You haven't got a chance.
{{L|Patrick|''[with microphone and headphones]'' SpongeBob readies the approach shot. He's gotta be very careful he doesn't hook the shot here, because this would certainly be an inopportune time for a bogey. ''[SpongeBob swings but stops]'' A pressure-packed shot to be sure. ''[leaves]''}}
 
{{L|''[SpongeBob sweats and wipes his forehead, shoots, ball stops right before it is about to go in.]''}}
Spongebob:You know,Patrick,this is just a game.
{{L|Bikini Bottomites|Aw. ''[all whisper]''}}
 
{{L|''[Cuts to a hole.]''}}
Patrick:Oh,it is just a game,which I am gonna win.
{{L|Patrick|Looks like we're tied, three shots to three.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Shots. ''[chuckles]'' They're called strokes in golf, Patrick. Not shots.}}
Spongebob:I think you're missing the point.(aims,practice shots)
{{L|Patrick|Whatever. ''[shoots and makes it]'' And he sinks another hole in one! That's two in a row!}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|All right. You wanna play competitive, eh? Observe. ''[shoots and makes it]'' Right between the old wickets. Come on bally, don't fail me now.}}
•Patrick:Speaking of m-m-MISSING!
{{L|Patrick|Watch out for the water hazard.}}
(Spongebob shoots by accident,startled by Patrick)
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, the only hazard I can see is you standing in my shot.}}
Ha!Gotta play it where it lands.Watch and learn,SquarePants.Watch and learn.
{{L|Patrick|I have no idea what you're talking about.}}
(shoots and makes it) YES!See if you can top that!
{{L|SpongeBob|Fine. Be that way. I'll just go around you. ''[shoots the ball an ball ricochets off of a picture, through the head of the Squidward butter sculpture and out the window]'' Oops.}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Show-off. I can do that. ''[shoots, SpongeBob ducks and goes out the window]''}}
Spongebob:(uneasily)Okay.
{{L|SpongeBob|Oh, where did our balls go?}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Well, how do I know? I was just copying you.}}
Patrick:(with microphone and headphones)
{{L|SpongeBob|''[shows the side of Squidward's house and broken window]'' Uh-oh. Oh well, I guess that's game point.}}
Spongebob readies the approach shot.He's gotta be very careful he doesn't hook the shot here,
{{L|Patrick|Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho, hold on there, fella. It's not over yet.}}
because this would certainly be an inopportune time for a bogey.(Spongebob swings but stops)A
{{L|SpongeBob|But remember what Squidward said? We can't make any noise!}}
pressure-packed shot to be sure.(leaves)
{{L|Patrick|Who said anything about noise? We're just gonna get outta the rough and back to the course!}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Hey! Patrick. Patrick! ''[Patrick is shown eating Squidward's kelp salad]'' What's the big idea? I thought we were in here to play golf, remember?}}
Spongebob:(dramatic music)(sweats and wipes his forehead,shoots,ball stops right before it's about to go in)
{{L|Patrick|Okay, okay!}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Now where is that darn ball?}}
Bikini Bottomites:Aw. (all whisper)
{{L|Patrick|Ooh!}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, have you seen my ball?}}
(cuts to hole)
{{L|Patrick|Was it a red one?}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Mm-hmm.}}
Patrick:Looks like we're tied,three shots to three.
{{L|Patrick|It might have been in the kelp salad.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, you ate my ball?}}
Spongebob:(chuckles)They're called strokes in golf,Patrick.
{{L|Patrick|Don't worry, I'll get it.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, no!}}
Patrick:Whatever.(shoots an makes it)AND HE SINKS ANOTHER HOLE IN ONE!That's two in a row!
{{L|Patrick|No?}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|I have to play the ball where it lies. ''[goes inside Patrick and opens his mouth]'' We'll need to leave this open. ''[goes back inside]'' Now, let's see, if I was a golf ball, where would I-oh! Next to the gallbladder, of course. Fore! ''[the ball goes through wall and hits the lamp]'' Where's your ball?}}
Spongebob:All right.You wanna play competitive,eh?Observe.(shoots and makes it)
{{L|Patrick|I don't know. Gotta be around here somewhere. ''[the ball is seen on Patrick's butt on the outside of his pants]''}}
Right between the old wickets.Come on bally,don't fail me now.
{{L|SpongeBob|There it is!}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Uh-oh.}}
Patrick:Watch out for the water hazard.
{{L|SpongeBob|Play it where it lies.}}
 
{{L|Patrick|''[angrily grumbling. Cuts to him shooting it and ricocheting off a cabinet to a overhead desk lamp, picture, and through a wall]'' Hole in one! Top that!}}
Spongebob:Patrick,the only hazard I can see is you standing in my shot.
{{L|SpongeBob|I could do that blindfolded. ''[Patrick hands him a blindfold]''}}
 
{{L|''[Cuts to blind SpongeBob. He hits a door. Feels around to identify it and slams the door.]''}}
Patrick:I have no idea what you're talking about.
{{L|Patrick|Hey, wait up! Warmer. Warmer. Red hot!}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|''[slams a door]'' Aha!}}
Spongebob:Fine.Be that way.I'll just go around you.(shoots ball an ball ricochets off of picture,
{{L|Patrick|Warmer. Warmer. Colder. Colder. Warmer. Warmer. Warmer. Hot. Hotter. Red hot! Red hot! ''[SpongeBob splits a table]'' No, wait. My mistake. You're ice cold. Oh, Warmer. Warmer. Hot. Hot. Red hot. Red hot! Smoking hot! ''[kills a plant]'' Wrong again.}}
through sculpture an out the window)Oops.
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick... ''[peeks out]''}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Stop peeking! Hotter. ''[wrecks Squidward's house along the way]'' Colder! Hotter! Hot! Cold. Hot! Cold. Hot! Cool. Hot! Cold.}}
Patrick:Show-off.I can do that.(shoots,Spongebob ducks and goes out the window)
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick! ''[takes the blindfold off]'' This is ridi- ''[sees Squidward's wrecked house]'' -culous. Wow. Squidward's really let this place go. Patrick!}}
 
{{L|Patrick|''[in shower]'' Aah!}}
Spongebob:Oh,where did our balls go?
{{L|SpongeBob|What are you doing?}}
 
{{L|Patrick|I was just freshening up. But these fancy fixtures are touchy. ''[turns fixture. Steam builds up around him]'' Hot! Red hot! Ah! Cold! Cold! Cold!}}
Patrick:Well,how do I know?I was just copying you.
{{L|SpongeBob|Would you please get back in the game?}}
 
{{L|Patrick|But I wanted to try his loofah.}}
Spongebob:(shows side of Squidward's house and broken window)Uh-oh.
{{L|SpongeBob|Those balls have gotta be around here somewhere. Oh, Patrick.}}
Oh well,I guess that's game point.
{{L|Patrick|Uhh, look a little closer, buddy.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|''[uneasily]'' Play it where it lies?}}
Patrick:Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho,hold on there,fella.It's not over yet.
{{L|Patrick|Play it where it lies.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|But how are we gonna hit our balls back to my house from here?}}
Spongebob:But remember what Squidward said?We can't make any noise!
{{L|Patrick|All it takes is a little finesse, SpongeBob. All it takes is a little finesse.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Okay, you're good to go.}}
Patrick:Who said anything about noise?We're just gonna get outta the rough and back to the course!
{{L|Patrick|Fore! ''[wrecks top front of house]'' It's all yours.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|This one's for all the marbles.}}
Spongebob:Hey!Patrick.Patrick!What's the big idea?I thought we were in here to play golf,
{{L|Patrick|I thought we weren't betting.}}
remember?
{{L|SpongeBob|No, I mean whoever wins this hole wins the game. ''[Squidward wakes up and takes off his blindfold to see SpongeBob and Patrick talking]''}}
 
{{L|Squidward|''[muffled]'' What's going on here? ''[screams]''}}
Patrick:Okay,okay!
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick shoot, landing Gary's food bowl, spilling on him.]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob and Patrick|Hole in one! ''[Squidward sits up]''}}
Spongebob:Now where is that darn ball?
{{L|SpongeBob|''[softly]'' Good morning.}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Sorry we woke you.}}
Patrick:Oh!
{{L|Squidward|''[muffled and stammering]'' Wha-What? ''[his mouth is shown, with no dentures]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Hey, Squidward, what happened to your dentures?}}
Spongebob:Patrick,have you seen by ball?
{{L|''[Cuts to Gary, with dentures in his bowl.]''}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Good game, pal.}}
Patrick:Was it a red one?
{{L|SpongeBob|Rematch next Saturday?}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Rain or shine, SpongeBob. Rain or shine.}}
Spongebob:M-hmm.
{{L|''[It stops raining, focusing on Squidward's house, which collapses.]''}}
 
{{L|Squidward|''[muffled angrily]'' SpongeBob?!}}
Patrick:It might have been in the kelp salad.
 
Spongebob:Patrick,you ate my ball?
 
Patrick:Don't worry,I'll get it.
 
Spongebob:Patrick,no!
 
Patrick:No?
 
Spongebob:I have to play the ball where it lies.(goes inside Patrick and opens his mouth)You'll  
need to leave this open.(goes back inside)Now,let's see,if I was a golf ball,where would I-oh!
Next to the gallbladder,of course.Fore!(ball goes through wall and hits lamp
Where's your ball?
 
Patrick:I don't know.Gotta be around here somewhere.(ball seen in Patrick's butthole on outside of
pants)
 
Spongebob:There it is!
 
Patrick:Uh-oh.
 
Spongebob:Play it where it lies.
 
Patrick:(angrily grumbling)(cuts to him shooting it and ricocheting off a cabinet to a overhead desk
lamp,picture,and through a wall)Hole in one!Top that!
 
Spongebob:I could do that blindfolded.(Patrick hands him a blindfold)
 
(cuts to blind Spongebob)
Spongebob:(he hits a door)(Thunk!)(feels around to identify it)(slams door)
 
Patrick:Wait up!Warmer.Warmer.Red hot!
 
Spongebob:(slams a door)Aha!
 
Patrick:Warmer.Warmer.Colder.Colder.Warmer.Warmer.Warmer.Hot.Hotter.
Red hot!Red hot!(Spongebob splits a table)Wait,My mistake.You're right.Oh.Warmer.Warmer.
Hot.Hot.Red hot.Red hot!Spongebob,red hot!(Kills a plant)Wrong Again.
 
Spongebob:Patrick-(peeks out)
 
Patrick:Stop peeking!Hotter.(wrecks Squidward's house along the way)
Hotter!Hot!Hot!Cold.Hot.Cold.Hot!Cold.
 
Spongebob:Patrick!This is ridic-(sees Squidward's wrecked house)
-ulous.Wow.Squidward's really let this place go.Patrick!
 
Patrick:(in shower)(screams)
 
Spongebob:What are you doing?
 
Patrick:I was just freshening up.These fancy fixtures are touchy(steam builds up around
Patrick)Hot!Red hot!Ah!Cold!Cold!
 
Spongebob:Would you please get back in the game?
 
Patrick:But I wanted to try his loofah.
 
Spongebob:Those balls have gotta be around here somewhere.Oh,
Patrick.(ding)
 
Patrick:Uhh,look a little closer,buddy.
 
Spongebob:(uneasily)Play it where it lies?
 
Patrick:Play it where it lies.
 
Spongebob:But how are we gonna hit our balls back to my house from here?
 
Patrick:All it takes is a little finesse,Spongebob.All it takes is a little finesse.
 
Spongebob:Okay,you're good to go.
 
Patrick:Fore!(wrecks top front of house)It's all yours
 
Spongebob:This one's for all the marbles.
 
Patrick:But I thought we weren't betting.
 
Spongebob:No,I mean whoever wins this hole wins the game.(Squidward
wakes up and takes off his blindfold to see spongebob and Patrick talking)
 
Squidward:(muffled)What's going on here?(screams)
(Spongebob and Patrick shoot,landing Gary's food bowl,spilling on him)
 
Spongebob and Patrick:(together)Hole in one!(Squidward sits up)
 
Spongebob:Good morning.
 
Patrick: Sorry we woke you.
 
Squidward:(muffled)(stammering)Wha-What?(his mouth is shown,with no denchers)
 
Spongebob:Hey,Squidward,what happened to your denchers?
 
(cuts to Gary,with denchers in his bowl)
 
Patrick:Good game,pal.
 
Spongebob:Rematch next Saturday?
 
Patrick:Rain or shine,Spongebob.Rain or shine.
 
(stops raining,focusing on Squidward's house,which collapses)
 
Squidward:(muffled)Guys?You guys?
 
(episode ends)
[[Category:Transcripts]]

Latest revision as of 03:43, 29 July 2025