The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie (PC)/transcript

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This article is the transcript for the PC video game, The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie, which was released on October 27, 2004.

• French Narrator: It is an extraordinary morning for SpongeBob. He wakes up even more excited than usual, for today is the day Mr. Krabs announces his appointment for manager of the Krusty Krab 2 and SpongeBob knows knows in his house that he is the sponge for the job. There is an added scoring in step and the world is a brighter place. He needs to get ready for work and then it's off to the Krusty Krab. Destiny awaits.
• SpongeBob: Looks like a beautiful day outside! The perfect weather for a promotion! My alarm clock! I tell ya, that thing is LOUD! It scares Gary half to death! That seems pretty normal. That's Gary Food bowl. He doesn't want any Food. He's dieting. Good morning, Gary!
• Gary: Meow.
• SpongeBob: I had that dream again, Gary!
• Gary: Meow?
• SpongeBob: And it's finally going to come true today! Because today is the grand opening of the Krusty Krab 2! And I think we all know who Mr. Krabs is going to promote to manager...
• Gary: Meow?
• SpongeBob: Rig - what? No silly, ME! I'm ready! PROMOTION! Well, I can't stand around here grabbing all day! Bye, Gary!
• Gary: Meow!
• SpongeBob: It's jammed! I need something tp pry it open with! The knob is broken! I need the control to turn it off. Now where did I leave that thing... I got that at a garage sale. It's my special toothbrush! Made for only two teeth! Time to shower! But, I'm not doing it in front of you. Close your eyes. (Humming) Ahh! Squeaky clean! Squeak, squeak! It's a spatula. Quite useful for flipping Krabby Patties. That is the oven where I hone my Patty cooking art! It's an ice cube. Hmm. It's kinda shape like me! These pictures are really bland. I wanna see sharks, or electric eels or something like that! Ah! There we go. Just needed to jimmy it. White shirt, brown shorts, red tie. Classic. My clothes! I need them. I'm bashful in the nude. Hi, Mr. Telephone Man!
• Phone Repairman: Whoa! Careful! Don't scare me like that. I'm very high-strug.
• SpongeBob: Whatcha doin?
• Phone Repairman: I'm trying to fix this phone line. It's broken.
• SpongeBob: I need to use the phone. It's really important!
• Phone Repairman: Well, I'd be glad to let you know when I'm done. It's gonna be a while though.
• SpongeBob: But, I need to use the phone NOW!!!
• Phone Repairman: Whaddaya want me to do? This phone line repair is delicate work, and it takes time.
• SpongeBob: Remember when I said hi to you? And you got so scared! Hahaha! Sigh. Good times, good times.
• Phone Repairman: I can't help it. I have a problem with loud noises - I don't even own an alarm clock.
• SpongeBob: Hey, is that wire real, or... Hahaha...phony? Hahaha!
• Phone Repairman: I don't follow.
• SpongeBob: Get it? Phony? Cause you're a Telephone man.
• Phone Repairman: Oh that's rich.
• Spongebob: Boo!
• Phone Repairman: Don't DO that!
• SpongeBob: I'm gonna get going. Have a good day!
• Phone Repairman: Bye. AUUUUUUUUGH!
• SpongeBob: Lemme just connect this wire to this thingy... there! That wasn't so hard. Looks like a phone box. My bike! If the chain weren't so rusty. I'd ride it in to work! That's a grill. Sometimes I make Krabby Patties right in my own backyard! Oh, could there be any sweeter? The TV is way too loud for me to make a phone call. I should turn it off first. Hi, Patrick, old buddy!
• Patrick: Hello, Mister Manager, sir!
• SpongeBob: Say, Patrick, tonight after my big promotion let's go out and party till we're purple!
• Patrick: I love being purple!
• SpongeBob: Why are you watching a TV that isn't even on?
• Patrick: My remote stopped working.
• SpongeBob: You could just get up and turn it on.
• Patrick: There's no need to overreact.
• SpongeBob: Patrick! That's MY remote! No wonder it doesn't turn YOUR TV on!
• Patrick: So you say this is your remote?
• SpongeBob: Yes.
• Patrick: Then, what is it doing at my house?
• SpongeBob: That's what I love about you, Patrick. You always ask the really important questions.
• Patrick: Exactly!
• SpongeBob: So, um, can I have my remote back?
• Patrick: Aww, but then I'm gonna have it to get up to turn on the TV AND go to the kitchen to get more ice for my Kelpsi! Why? Why? Whhhhhy?? This cruelty is unbearable!
• SpongeBob: Well, if I got you some ice for your Kelpsi? Then you'd only have to get up once!
• Patrick: You'd do that for me?
• SpongeBob: No problem, buddy! Getting ice is what friends are for! Except in France. Here you are, Buddy! One piece of ice. Hurry up and take it. It's melting.
• Patrick: Now, wait just a minute! This ice is COLD!
• SpongeBob: Uh, yeah.
• Patrick: You don't fool me for one second, Mister.
• SpongeBob: Oookay...
• Patrick: I'll let you off this time, seeing us as you probably have other things on your mind. But don't let it happen-again!
• SpongeBob: Okay, I won't!
• Patrick: Here's your remote.
• SpongeBob: Thanks? I would call Squidward, but he keeps changing his phone number to avoid me! Am I really that annoying? Hi, Squidward! Whatcha doin?
• Squidward: I'm compromising the next movement of my latest opus! The theme is unwelcome visits from neighbors. Write what you know.
• SpongeBob: Opus, huh?
• Squidward: Whaddaya want, SpongeBob? I'm sort of busy here.
• SpongeBob: I was wondering if I could borrow some of your toothpaste. I'm out and I want to look my best for the grand opening today.
• Squidward: I'd love to help you out, SpongeBob, only I'm not going to do.
• SpongeBob: How can you compose a porpoise with the radio on?
• Squidward: Opus. And the radio gives me... erm...ideas. I mean inspiration. I don't steal my melodies, if that's what you are saying!
• SpongeBob: Maybe I'll turn off the radio for you. Would you like that? I'd do anything to help!
• Squidward: Honestly, SpongeBob, I couldn't care less what you do, as long as you do it as Far away here as possible.
• SpongeBob: Can't I pleeeeeeease have some toothpaste? My breath is getting sort of briney.
• Squidward: I noticed that. It's horrible. I weep for those around you.
• SpongeBob: Isn't the opening of the Krusty Krab 2 exciting? I want you to know, I plan to thank YOU in my managerial acceptance speech!
• Squidward: Did you happen to notice that I am showering?
• SpongeBob: Well, bye for now, Squidward!
• Squidward: Oh, you're leaving! My horoscope was right! Today is a day of great joy!
• SpongeBob: Ahh, much better. Now Squidward won't be so deaf to the rest of the world! Hi again, neighbor!
• Squidward: What now?
• SpongeBob: I turned the radio off, Squidward!
• Squidward: Wow. All by yourself?
• SpongeBob: Yep! It wasn't that hard, really. I can't take that! Squidward might see me. He really only needs one chair. I don't think he's ever had anyone over for dinner. That must be Squidward's new phone number! He sure changes it a lot. I should give him a call sometime.
• Squidward: Hello? Who is it?
• SpongeBob: Heh, heh.
• Squidward: Who's there? Is this you, SpongeBob??
• SpongeBob: Sigh. Hee, hee! He could be there listening to the sound of ocean all day. Best not to bother him. I don't even think Squidward has teeth! He won't miss this. A-ha! I did it! Hooray! My teeth are clean! Now I can go to the Krusty Krab to accept the mantle of manager! I'm ready! Responsibility!
• French Narrator: Meanwhile, Plankton lurks in the Chum Bucket cooking up another evil plan to take over Bikini Bottom. He is a jealous and egotistical creature. His height maybe measured in millimeters, but his vanity spans needs.
• Plankton: Hey, watch it! I can hear you you know!
• French Narrator: Oh, a thousand pardons. What I meant to say was... Help Plankton find and carry out the plan that will make all of Bikini Bottom tremble at his awesome power.
• Plankton: You know, I'm kinda starting to like you. Looks like a beautiful day outside! Perfect weather for implementing an evil scheme. Let's see what we can come up with, shall we? Down here!
• Karen Plankton: What do you want?
• Plankton: I need to find a way to steal Mr. Krabs' secret Krabby Patty recipe! I've tried everything I can think of!
• Karen Plankton: In other words, not much.
• Plankton: You aren't helping.
• Karen Plankton: Have you checked all the evil plans in your filling cabinet?
• Plankton: Yes! Every last one! From A to Y. There is nothing left.
• Karen Plankton: Um, what about Z?
• Plankton: Z?
• Karen Plankton: Z. The letter after Y.
• Plankton: Eroops!
• Karen Plankton: Oh, boy.
• Plankton: I'm spiritually bankrupt! I have no soul. How can I find my place this cruel cruel world?
• Karen Plankton: You're complaining to me about having no soul? I'm a computer! Have a little tact.
• Plankton: Oh. Er, sorry, my dear. That is all for now, wife! Return to your spousal duties at once.
• Karen Plankton: By 'spousal duties,' do you mean overlooking your many Faults and watching you blunder your way through another doomed attempt to take over the world?
• Plankton: I have one word for you. Magnet.
• Karen Plankton: You couldn't lift it.
• Plankton: It's a symbol of the oppression of the working class! Also, it's a wrench. Robot SpongeBob! Move! I order you! Hmm. He isn't answering my commands. He must be broken. Luckily, as his creator, I know the innermost workings! Fixing him should be a snap. Now, let's see... Plan Z. Steal Crown... Frame Krabs... I like it, I like it! It's got panache! So let's do this step by step! Step one, get to Neptune's Castle and steal his crown! Child's play! You think that mop looks too big for me to carry? Shows what you know. A wrench can be quite a precision tool, as long as you know exactly where to throw it! Let's test the Robotic SpongeBob and see if he performs his duty. Ahhh! My glorious Jetpack! It's my Jetpack. It allows me to fly far above the heads of those who will one day be my vassals! Whoa! This jetpack doesn't handle too well. I must not have tightened that phalanges sufficiently! Let's hope I don't get into an accident. Ahh, Neptune's castle. Why don't I have a castle, you may very well ask? Sadly, that question lacks a satisfactory answer. Anyway, let's get down to business. It's a stinky Seahorse Shoe. Seahorses don't even have feet. What genius thought of these? Speak, quisling!
• Ranch Hand: Did I just hear something?
• Plankton: Yes, down here! Answer me before I destroy you!
• Ranch Hand: I coulda sworn I heard SOMETHING, but I guess it was just the gosh-tooting wind.
• Plankton: Blast! Oh well, I doubt she would had anything interesting to say anyway. I'd better not. They probably wouldn't be very friendly, and their boots look heavy! You wouldn't need a battering ram to break these down. A battering worm would do just fine. It might be a thread to some, but to me it is a coil of the strongest rope! Hello, Clown.
• Jester: Wha? Who's there?!
• Plankton: Down here!
• Jester: Yikes! Sea lice! Please don't bite me!
• Plankton: I am not a louse. And I would never bite you! I don't know where you've been.
• Jester: I KNEW we needed to get the castle tented.
• Plankton: Listen, toady, I need information.
• Jester: What do you want from me?
• Plankton: I'm trying to get into the throne room - I have important business with King Neptune! Now how would I do that?
• Jester: You probably want to bite him.
• Plankton: I assure you, I do not.
• Jester: The doors to the throne room are electric! There's a button on the side that slides them open. I call it the electric slide button.
• Plankton: I can't reach it.
• Jester: Guess you are going to have bite someone else, then!
• Plankton: Can you help me open the doors?
• Jester: I'm not opening the doors for a louse.
• Plankton: For the last time, I am NOT the louse.
• Jester: Well, I'm not opening the doors for you anyway. There's a nail sticking out of the wood next to the button, and my hat always gets caught on it! I'm not risking my thirty-seventy cotton blend for anybody. Especially a louse.
• Plankton: A nail, huh? Hmm... You're a jester, right? Do something funny.
• Jester: Er... how about this?
• Plankton: Wow - limber! I've gotta go!
• Jester: You can say that again!
• Plankton: You have GOT to be kidding. The door is way too big for me to move. If only my intellect could be made flesh! I would be unstoppable! Ah hah! It's a stinky Seahorse Shoe with a thread tied to it! Genius I tell you! Mind over matter once again! Each victory is sweeter than the last! Ah hah! Once again my genius silences the pundits! Ah ha! The crown is mine! Mr. Krabs, prepare to meet thy doom!
• French Narrator: So Plankton steals Neptune's Crown, sending Neptune into a rage that pervades the entire ocean. Meanwhile, back at the Krusty Krab, things did not go well for SpongeBob. It seems Monsieur Krabs has seen fit to make Squidward manager instead of him. You see, Mr. Krabs thinks SpongeBob is still just a kid, but SpongeBob being a creature of great fortitude takes the news extremely well. After an embarrassing evening at Goofy Goobers, SpongeBob returns to the Krusty Krab the next morning, only to find King Neptune has frozen Mr. Krabs. He believes that Mr. Krabs has stolen his crown and will fry him to a crisp if the crown is not returned in five days. Neptune's daughter, Mindy tries to change his mind, but Neptune is as stubborn as he is mighty. SpongeBob in a fit of heroics, vows to save Mr. Krabs and show everyone once and for all that he is a man, not a kid. So help him retrieve the crown. It is in Shell City, a mystical place. Far Far Away. Find some means of transportation and get going.
• SpongeBob: Okay. I better get to the Patty Mobile, quick! That's the only way I'll be able to reach Shell City in time to save Mr. Krabs! Hey there, Squidward. I just wanted to say... congratulations on the promotion.
• Squidward: Feh. A lot good it does me with Mr. Krabs frozen. Who's going to sign my new and improved paychecks?
• SpongeBob: To show that there are no hard feelings, I'd be more than happy to sign your paychecks!
• Squidward: SpongeBob, you really are Knucklehead McSpazmatron.
• SpongeBob: So, I need to get to Shell City quickly! I'm gonna use Mr. Krabs 'Patty Mobile to get there! What do you think about that?
• Squidward: I think all pedestrians should be put on high alert.
• SpongeBob: Me too! Do you know where Mr. Krabs keeps the Patty Mobile?
• Squidward: It's in an underground cavern beneath the restaurant. You can get to it through the kitchen - but, you need a pass card to use the elevator.
• SpongeBob: Barnacles! Where can I get one?
• Squidward: Well, as manager, I was issued a pass card just today!
• SpongeBob: Oooo! Can I have it?
• Squidward: No, you can't.
• SpongeBob: But I neeeeeeeeeeed it!
• Squidward: I lost it, okay? I was cleaning a table and it must have fallen out of my pocket. There were a couple of kids in here earlier, a boy and a girl. I bet one of THEM took it.
• SpongeBob: Barnacles.
• Squidward: Don't tell Mr. Krabs. If he ever gets unfrozen that is.
• SpongeBob: Well, goodbye, Manager Squidward. I have to go save Mr. Krabs now.
• Squidward: Hah! Yes, well, good luck! I'm sure you can't POSSIBLY fail.
• SpongeBob: Hey - you're right! Thanks, Squidward! He's out cold. Hi! You look familiar. Where have I seen you before?
• Familiar Guy: I come in here EVERY day, and you say the same thing to me EVERY day. That probably explains it.
• SpongeBob: Hmm. No, no. I don't think that's it. Did you go to driving school last summer? Or the summer before? Or last fall? Or winter... or spring? Basically, have you ever been to driving school? I'm there pretty much all the time.
• Familiar Guy: No. Never.
• SpongeBob: Ever driven a car?
• Familiar Guy: Yes.
• SpongeBob: Ah hah! That must be it! I must have seen you driving around town.
• Familiar Guy: Hey, sure, whatever.
• SpongeBob: You know, Mr. Krabs was frozen by King Neptune because his crown was taken to Shell City. I'm going to go get it and save the day!
• Familiar Guy: I've heard rumors to that effect. So what are you doing standing around here talking to me? Why don't you get Krabs' Patty Mobile and get going?
• SpongeBob: I plan to! There are few things I need to do first, though.
• Familiar Guy: Well, don't take too long... I've heard he doesn't have much time.
• SpongeBob: I'm going to get going. Have a nice day!
• Familiar Guy: Hey, with you gone, how could I possibly have a bad day?
• SpongeBob: That's the spirit! Hey, it's you! Good to see you didn't have a heart attack!
• Phone Repairman: Please don't go scaring me again. I'm in quite a state.
• SpongeBob: Wow! You're Perch Perkins, the news reporter!
• Perch Perkins: Why, yes I am! How nice for you to meet me.
• SpongeBob: If I save Mr. Krabs, will you do a hero piece on me??
• Perch Perkins: Hmm... Hero pieces don't skew as well as deep fried crab pieces, but perhaps who knows?
• SpongeBob: Yippeee!!! Well, I need to get going! Saving Mr. Krabs and all that, you know.
• Perch Perkins: Yes! Well, good luck with that.
• SpongeBob: Hello there, little girl!
• Little Girl: Hi.
• SpongeBob: Hey, have you seen a card with little holes punched in it lying around?
• Little Girl: Oh, you mean the super powerful magic plastic thingy?
• SpongeBob: Uh - maybe! You've seen it?
• Little Girl: Yep!
• SpongeBob: Do you have it?
• Little Girl: Nope. Morty has it.
• SpongeBob: Ohhh! Who's Morty?
• Little Girl: My friend.
• SpongeBob: Do you know where he is?
• Little Girl: He went to Goofy Goobers. He said he wanted some weird ice cream.
• SpongeBob: Thanks! I'm gonna go! Have a nice day!
• Little Girl: Bye!
• SpongeBob: That's hot oil - REALLY hot! Ow. Mr. Krabs wouldn't want me snooping around in his office wen he's not here. Well, I guess if I'm going to find Morty, I'd better visit Goofy Goober's Strictly business, though! Hit there, little guy!
• Morty: Oh, hello.
• SpongeBob: You like Goofy Goober, huh?
• Morty: Yep!
• SpongeBob: Me too.
• Morty: That's nice.
• SpongeBob: Goofy Goober is my hero!
• Morty: He's okay.
• SpongeBob: Hey, what's that thing on the table?
• Morty: It's my Super Magic Fairy Card of power! I found it at the Krusty Krab.
• SpongeBob: Oooooo! Can I have it?
• Morty: No! I found it... It's mine!
• SpongeBob: I'll be your bestest most friendliest friend!
• Morty: Eh, no thanks.
• SpongeBob: Isn't there anything I can do to get you to give me that super califragilist... Uh - thingy?
• Morty: Hmmm... I guess I might trade it for some fried ice cream.
• SpongeBob: Fried ice cream? Blech!
• Morty: Hey, don't knock it till you've tried it.
• SpongeBob: So... Fried ice cream, huh?
• Morty: Yep.
• SpongeBob: Okay, I'm on it!
• Morty: Good luck, they don't make it here.
• SpongeBob: Welp, I gotta go! Important matters demand my attention. That looks like a pass card of some kind. Goofy Goober!
• Goofy Goober: Well, hello there, little Goob! Welcome to Goofy Goober's!
• SpongeBob: I'm sorry if I got a little crazy here last night, I was just depressed. I got passed over for a promotion... cause I'm just a kid.
• Goofy Goober: Hey, there's nothing wrong with being a kid! Kids can be responsible too! There's nothing a grown up can do that a kid can't!
• SpongeBob: Yeah, but no one believes in me! I'm trying to get to Shell City to save my friend Mr. Krabs, and no one thinks I can do it!
• Goofy Goober: Whoooa! Shell City? Take my advice, kid. Go home.
• SpongeBob: Bye, Goofy Goober! I'll be backs soon, I promise!
• Goofy Goober: Yuck, yuck! Bye, little Gooberian! Don't forget to buy something before you leave!
• SpongeBob: It's an organ. Hey, I know that guy! But he looks busy. Best not to bother him. Look at the candy! But after last night, looking at candy makes me feel a little nauseous. Hi!
• Walter the Waiter: Oh, it's you! I remember you. Did you get the carpet cleaning bill yet?
• SpongeBob: One order of fried ice cream, please!
• Walter the Waiter: We don't make fried ice cream.
• SpongeBob: Well, what do you make?
• Walter the Waiter: Un-fried ice cream.
• SpongeBob: All right, Skipper, one unfried ice cream cone!
• Walter the Waiter: Here you are, after last night, one if your limit. And DON'T call me Skipper.
• SpongeBob: Ah, the other day, that was fun, huh? We ate some ice cream. Hah, hah, and we were singing!
• Walter the Waiter: Fun? I was here all night cleaning up after you. Kindly don't do it again.
• SpongeBob: I'm off! Thanks, Barkeep!
• Walter the Waiter: Hey, any day, you don't throw up on the bar is a good day.
• SpongeBob: That's an odd assortment of pictures. Tongs! An essential component of any chef's apron pockets! It's an ice cream cone with tongs attacked to it! Brilliant! It's a deep-fried ice cream cone! There's no accounting for taste. Here you go, kid! One fried ice cream cone!
• Morty: Hooray! Crunchy and creamy! Gimmie!
• SpongeBob: Can I have that pass card now?
• Morty: Smack! Slurp! Yeah, take it!
• SpongeBob: Hi, Goofy Goober! It's me again! You remember me, doncha? Huh?
• Goofy Goober: Why of course! Goofy Goober remembers all his little Goobites!
• SpongeBob: I bet you get people going a little goofy in here all the time.
• Goofy Goober: Not really. Yesterday was a banner day though, there was you, and then there were these two guys that work at the gas station on the county line... they were making a quite scene.
• SpongeBob: Oh, yeah? What were they doing?
• Goofy Goober: Dancing on the tables, singing really, really loud. One of them insisted I give him the sheet music to the Goofy Goober theme song! I mean really! They were a bit old for that sort of thing.
• SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs doesn't trust people enough! This is my favorite song! I didn't realize Mr. Krabs was so handy!
• Patrick: Hello, Mister Manager, sir!
• SpongeBob: Hi again, Patrick!
• Patrick: Oh, hi SpongeBob!
• SpongeBob: Whatcha doing?
• Patrick: I'm a pirate! Argh!
• SpongeBob: Sounds dangerous.
• Patrick: You can say that again!
• SpongeBob: I've gotta go, Patrick!
• Patrick: Okay, bye SpongeBob!
• SpongeBob: Noting can stop us now, Patrick! Feel the wind in your hair! That's the taste of Freedom in your mouth!
• Patrick: Oh. I thought it was a bug.
• French Narrator: Huh. Our friends have successfully obtained the Patty Mobile. This should make their journey to Shell City much easier. Sacra bleu. What is this? Shortly after crossing the Bikini Bottom County Line, our friends are stopped by a thug who demands that they give him the Patty Mobile immediately. Our friends put up a valiant fight. But at last, in the end, they are no match for the vile ruffian. So it would seem they are back to square one.
• SpongeBob: Oh, no. Hi. Nice day, doncha think?
• Gas Station Attendant: Yup!
• SpongeBob: So how's life on the Bikini Bottom Frontier?
• Gas Station Attendant: Tougher than you can handle, ain't that right, Lloyd? Har-har!
• Lloyd: Har, har, har, har!
• SpongeBob: These guys are getting on my nerves. So, what have you fellas been up to?
• Gas Station Attendant: Not much! It's enough fun just watchin poor saps like yourself try and survive over the county line!
• Lloyd: Oh, but we did go to Goofy Goober's last night. That was fun.
• Gas Station Attendant: Shhh! Why'd you have to go an tell 'em that?
• Lloyd: Well, you looked like you were having fun, singing and dancing on the tables than you.
• Gas Station Attendant: I did not!
• Lloyd: Yes, you did! And you hugged Goofy Goober and told him he was your best friend and then I got upset because I thought I was your best friend and then -
• Gas Station Attendant: Pay no attention to him.
• Lloyd: And then you get the sheet music to the Goofy Goober theme cause you said you wanted to go home and learn to play it on your harmonica -
• Gas Station Attendant: I don't even have harmonicas. I really have no idea what's he talking about.
• Lloyd: Oh, yeah? Well then why don't you empty your pockets? You're still wearing the same pants. I bet the sheet music is still in here!
• Gas Station Attendant: Don't be ridiculous! Excuse me for a moment.
• Lloyd: He even said that Goofy Goober was his hero, and that he wanted to be just like him!
• SpongeBob: Where did he go?
• Gas Station Attendant: Okay, I'm back! No sheet music in my pockets! I have no idea what you're talking about, and I think we should stop talking about it right NOW.
• Lloyd: Did you just throw away the sheet music?
• Gas Station Attendant: I am never speaking to you again.
• SpongeBob: I'm off!
• Gas Station Attendant: You ain't gonna last ten seconds over the county line!
• Lloyd: Har, har, har!
• SpongeBob: Oh, yeah? We'll see about that! It's sheet music for the Goofy Goober song! Who in their right mind would throw this away?? That reminds me! I'm tired. Wow. Sure is a lot of junk in here. Well, Patrick we should just go home.
• Patrick: What? Who are you? What have you done with SpongeBob?
• SpongeBob: What are you talking about, Patrick?
• Patrick: The SpongeBob I know is defiant in the face of insurmountable odds!
• SpongeBob: He's what? In the face of what?
• Patrick: I don't know! The point is, you shouldn't give up so easy. We're a team, and we won't quit! Never!
• SpongeBob: You're right, Patrick! Why should I let these little set backs get me down? Together, we can accomplish anything! Our car! We have to figure out a way to get it back! The guy who took it probably has the keys near him.
• Patrick: Let's just march in there and take 'em!
• SpongeBob: Patrick! I think we're going to have to be a little more sneaky than that. Maybe if we distract him...
• Patrick: Yeah! Distract him!
• SpongeBob: Then we can take the keys while he isn't looking!
• Patrick: Sounds like a great idea!
• SpongeBob: Okay, let's get it to it, buddy!
• Patrick: I gotta go to the bathroom!
• SpongeBob: But Patrick, what about the -- distraction? Barnacles! I don't think so. It's a bottle. Hi there mister... I mean, Misters!
• Twins: Hello.
• SpongeBob: What are you two doing?
• Twins: We're drinking rusty dirt water, and trying to remember the words to a song.
• SpongeBob: Oh, yeah? What song is that?
• Twins: That's none of your business.
• SpongeBob: Is it the Goofy Goober song?
• Twins: Yes. No. I mean, maybe. Why, do you know it?
• SpongeBob: I know most of it. Want me to trach it to you?
• Twins: No! If someone hears, we'll get in trouble.
• SpongeBob: Maybe I can find another way to show it to you!
• Twins: You do that. We're not going anywhere.
• SpongeBob: Here you go, fellas - the sheet music to the Goofy Goober theme song! Enjoy!
• Twins: Shhhh! Do you have to say that so loud? Thanks.
• SpongeBob: Hello, barkeep! Nice place you've got here.
• Bartender: No it isn't! It's nasty place. And we'd like to keep it that way.
• SpongeBob: Ah. Well, you know best!
• Bartender: Whaddaya want? In case you didn't notice, I'm in a bad mood.
• SponegBob: May I please have some ice cream?
• Bartender: Hahahaha! Ice Cream? Only babies eat ice cream! You're not a baby are you?
• SpongeBob: Er... No! I mean, No!
• Bartender: I'm not so sure about that myself. Watch your step, or you'll end up squashed. We deal with babies in a most unpleasant way.
• SpongeBob: I'm gonna look around your beautiful establishment, if you don't mind!
• Bartender: Oooo, bust out of the red carpet for Mr. Fancytalk! Why I oughta...
• SpongeBob: Hi there large person.
• Thug: Whaddaya want, runt? We're playing game here.
• SpongeBob: Did you ever visit Mussel Beach? You probably work out there!
• Thug: Heh, mussel beach? Don't make me laugh. I get all the workout I nee beating on people. In fact, you're tempting mw to launch into a few reps right about now.
• SpongeBob: Yeah, you know, I go there sometimes... work on the lats... and pecs, and uh... Fin... gers.
• Thug: Great. Why don't you go there now. Before I get all unpleasant-like.
• SpongeBob: Do you know what I hate? Sandy Feet. Cause then you get sand in the bed, and you can never get it ALL out there's always this one last grain and no matter how much you shake... the um...
• Thug: Beat it. Before I beat you.
• SpongeBob: Well, I should let you get back to your bullying!
• Thug: Yeah. If you know what's good for you. Which I doubt you do.
• SpongeBob: Er - exercise?
• Thug: Bah.
• SpongeBob: Hi, Patrick, old buddy!
• Patrick: Hey, SpongeBob!
• SpongeBob: Whatcha doing?
• Patrick: Duh duh duh doo doo... Dum, dum, dum, dum!
• SpongeBob: Right... Well, you seem busy. I'll leave you to your insane mutterings! There's no soap in the thing! Hello again! I'm back.
• Bartender: Still alive, huh? Surprising.
• SpongeBob: Say, the soap dispenser in the bathroom it out of soap. My hands are kinda dirty, you think you could refill it?
• Bartender: You're lucky I don't refill you - to the brim with a pipin-hot-butt-whoopin. Fine. If it'll you get off my back.
• SpongeBob: Well, squeeze me dry and call me Gerald! It worked!
• Bartender: There. Full. Hope you are happy. Acutally, I hope you are MISERABLE! So forget I said anything. Hey! Who blew these bubbles?!?!
• SpongeBob: Quick, Patrick! Let's grab the keys while he isn't looking!
• Patrick: Good idea!
• French Narrator: So, having reclaimed the Patty Mobile has their own, SpongeBob and Patrick are once again on their way to Shell City. Meanwhile, Neptune's daughter, Mindy has been grounded. Help her get out of her father's castle so she can help her heroes.
• Mindy: I have to find a way out of here! Maybe I can commandeer Daddy's Seahorse Carriage. It's very fast, and I need to get to SpongeBob and Patrick as quickly as possible! That's my bed. That's where I keep my clothes. While, my shirts, anyway. The one downer about being a mermaid is that I miss out on all the great shoe sales. Wow. This mirror is filthy. It's embarrassing! Ahh! That let some air in. This room needed some ventilation. It's a bottle of glue! It's makeup! I've already got some on.
• Guard: Sorry, Princess, I can't let you through! Orders and all!
• Mindy: This room needed some ventilation. I can't do that. Daddy would no approve. I'd better not close the window now, or it'll get stuck shut! Out of my way! I need to get out of here to help my friends!
• Guard: I'm sorry, Princess Mindy. I was specifically instructed by the King not to let you leave until he returns.
• Mindy: You realize that blindly obeying orders without thinking is a dangerous thing to do?
• Guard: Not as dangerous as blindly disobeying orders!
• Mindy: You don't understand. If you don't let me out of here, someone could die! My father has a bit of a temper.
• Guard: I know! That's exactly why I'm not letting you out of my sight! I don't wanna end up in that dungeon like that poor Crown Polisher!
• Mindy: He threw the Crown Polisher in the dungeon?
• Guard: Yeah, he said. 'Now that I don't have a Crown, what do I need you for? Why don't you go polish some bars!' and poof! To the dungeon he went. I ain't goin out like that.
• Mindy: Doesn't that sort of injustice make you mad?
• Guard: It's all relative. I mean to say, it coulda been worse. Coulda been me. Could STILL be me, if you follow me.
• Mindy: That is the wrong point of view, if you ask me.
• Guard: It's a point of view that's kept me out of jail so far.
• Mindy: Okay, I know you weren't going to believe this, but a major sea monster is outside my window! And he said something about your mother...
• Guard: My mother?! Outta my way! For King and Country - and Mommy. Well, this is embarrassing. I seem to be stuck. Mindy? Little help here? Mindy? I think I've been had.
• Mindy: That took care of him! Now I need to get to Daddy's Seahorse Carriage! He keeps it just outside the courtyard. Hi! Any idea where Daddy went?
• Squire: Mindy! Shouldn't you be in your room? I thought I heard the King say you were grounded...
• Mindy: I was grounded, but then Daddy called and said that I was free to go.
• Squire: Aww, that old softy!
• Mindy: Yeah. Freeing your own daughter from imprisonment. He's quite the teddy bear. Why are you still here? Shouldn't you be away with Daddy?
• Squire: I should. But I asked permission to stay here, because I, umm... want to, um... go see Dolly.
• Mindy: Dolly? The ranch hand? Wait a second... Do you like her?
• Squire: Er, maybe! But I'm too afraid to talk to her!
• Mindy: Don't be afraid! Just go tell her how you feel! Any girl would be lucky to have you as an admirer!
• Squire: Do you really think so?
• Mindy: Yeah! Now don't waste another minute! Go tell her how you feel!
• Squire: Okay! I will! But wait!
• Mindy: What's wrong?
• Squire: I need to check how I look! I need a mirror! Do you have one I can borrow?
• Mindy: I do have one, somewhere! Here's my mirror!
• Squire: Ew! It's so grimy I can't even see myself in it! This doesn't do me any good! I could have a rash and not know it!
• Mindy: You DON'T have a rash, I promise you!
• Squire: I need to check for myself! Can you clean that mirror? It's gross.
• Mindy: Okay, fine! I'll be back. Hi.
• Jailer: Hello, Princess.
• Mindy: Wow, it smells so much better down here and than it did last week! The stench level is almost tolerable.
• Jailer: Yep! The guards have stopped passing out and everything!
• Mindy: What was it?
• Jailer: You're probably better off not knowing. Let's just say mold can crop up in the most unexpected and surprising places!
• Mindy: I can't believe Daddy threw the Crown Polisher in the dungeon after all.
• Jailer: Yeah, he was very upset. He had me put him in the worst cell. It has bad lightning and it's Chi is all out of whack. I couldn't spend five minutes in there without losing it!
• Mindy: When is he getting out?
• Jailer: Well, your father said 'Never!' Not in the million billion years! I will see him for an eternity, and another dozen eternities on top of that!'
• Mindy: So...
• Jailer: Tuesday, probably.
• Mindy: Can I see the Crown Polisher, please?
• Jailer: Sorry, Princess. I can't let you by. The King wouldn't approve.
• Mindy: I just want to talk to him!
• Jailer: Nope, nope! I can't let you. Sorry.
• Mindy: How goes the dungeon-running business?
• Jailer: Oh, it's thriving! There's always someone to question, or throw into a cell, or shackle. I just wish I was better at it.
• Mindy: Don't be so hard on yourself. I think you run this dungeon just fine.
• Jailer: Well, you know, they don't teach you at this school. If I had a book on it, I could do so much better.
• Mindy: A book on running a dungeon, huh?
• Jailer: Yeah, it could tell me what to do, like should I use the rack? Should I glower menacingly, or, give me an evil laugh? Stuff like that.
• Mindy: Hmm. Sounds like it would be an interesting read. I'm going to go, I'll come back and visit soon!
• Jailer: Okay! I like it when you visit!
• Mindy: The Dungeon's Master's Handbook. And it's got a picture of a dragon on it! Most of these books have never been cracked. Daddy rarely comes in here. There's dust on everything! Look what I brought you!
• Jailer: The Dungeon Master's Handbook! Wow, thanks, Mindy! You're the greatest!
• Mindy: Do you think I could get in to see the Crown Polisher now?
• Jailer: Okay, okay. But just for a minute! And don't tell anyone I let you go back there. The first thing it says in this here book is 'Never show your soft side'!
• Mindy: I promise I'll tell everyone how scary and intimidating you are.
• Jailer: Thanks, Princess!
• Mindy: Oh, dear! Daddy really did throw you in the dungeon! Poor little fella!
• Royal Crown Polisher: Oh, hi, Princess.
• Mindy: How are you passing the time in here?
• Royal Crown Polisher: I count rats! It takes longer than you might think. I do miss my old job though. Oh, what I wouldn't give for something to polish!
• Mindy: Say, can you polish this mirror up for me?
• Royal Crown Polisher: Really? Can I?? It's been so long since I've polished something... I'm starting to go into withdrawal!
• Mindy: Here you go!
• Royal Crown Polisher: Thanks! There you are! Polished as good as new!
• Mindy: Thanks, little fella! Here's my mirror!
• Squire: Ahh! Que magnfique! How could I have doubted my own suavity! Thank you, Princess! And now, I must go! U have a date with destiny!
• Mindy: Good luck!
• Squire: With eyes like mine, luck isn't necessary!
• Mindy: Wow. That was a quick one-eighty. The barn is dirty. It could use a river or two diverted into it. Perfect! Now I can reach SpongeBob and Patrick in no time!
• French Narrator: Mindy has found our heroes just as they're about to enter the dreaded grey trench where dark and evil things lurk. They have lost their precious Patty Mobile once again. Mindy senses they are low morale and boost their confidence by bestowing false mustaches made of seaweed upon them with renewed vigor. They marched headlong into the great trench, confident they can handle anything it throws their way.
• SpongeBob: We have to cross this plain to get to the other side of the trench! It looks pretty spooky, but I know we can do it!
• Patrick: We just passed a hotel...Can't we stay there for a while?
• SpongeBob: No, Patrick! We have to get to Shell City! We don't have much time left! This place oozes evil! Whoa. The stench.
• Patrick: Smells like feet.
• SpongeBob: Yeah! It does! It's horrible!
• Patrick: Oh. I kinda liked it.
• SpongeBob: If the fog gets any thicker, it's gonna be tough to see were we're going! Hi!
• Wanderer: Huh? Oh, hi.
• SpongeBob: This fog is pretty bad, right?
• Wanderer: Yeah. You'd need a lighthouse to cross this place without getting hopelessly lost.
• SpongeBob: I'm gonna go!
• Wanderer: Sure. Whatever.
• SpongeBob: That thing is scary! Hotel Deep Six. Not exactly five star from the look of it. Hello there. Nice place you got here.
• Hotel Manager: It is indeed. Indeed it is.
• SpongeBob: Isn't this sort of an odd place for such a swank hotel?
• Hotel Manager: What can I tell you? Speculative real estate is a risky business. And I got this place for a song - the land was an old oyster bed. Nobody would touch it.
• SpongeBob: I demand room service! Two Krabby Patties, to my room, immediately!
• Hotel Manager: You don't have a room.
• SpongeBob: Well, then, I demand month service! Two Krabby Patties, to my mouth immediately!
• Hotel Manager: How about lip service? I think I could accommodate your gracious and noble personage there, sir.
• SpongeBob: Are you insulting me? Because if you are, you do it better than anyone I've ever met.
• Hotel Manager: If that is truth, then my life was not in vain.
• SpongeBob: Welp, nice talking to ya!
• Hotel Manager: Your sauvity! Your elegant way with words! I shan't soon forget you.
• SpongeBob: Wow! Your room is so much bigger than mine! Well, bigger than mine! Well, bigger than I imagine mine would be. If I had one.
• Old Lady: I'm guessing you usually knock before coming into a person's room.
• SpongeBob: Nah... Don't see much point! Nice room, huh?
• Old Lady: I'm of the opinion that it has a vaguely larcenous motif.
• SpongeBob: You can say that again! And I still won't understand it... Are you all right, ma'am? You seem upset.
• Old Lady: No, I'm not all right, as a matter of fact. Somebody stole my pearls last night! From rigt out of this very room! And whoever it was left this strange Orb in its place. I'm in a state of shock!
• SpongeBob: Pearls, huh? Patrick, what do you think?
• Patrick: I think it's a job for Detective SpongeBob and Inspector Star!
• SpongeBob: Me too! Never fear, madam, we have never lost a case! Or even taken on a case! In either case, we have a perfect record. To be brief. Case.
• Old Lady: Oh, dear.
• SpongeBob: We will investigate the matter fully! Search every nook and cranny. For clues - just in case! Be all over this place like a cheap suit! Case.
• Old Lady: I - I don't know what to say.
• SpongeBob: Inspector Star, we must keep our eyes peeled! Give everything a long hard look! If people think we're rude, so bet it! If starting will solve this crime, then we shall stare! Case.
• Patrick: Heh. Staircase.
• SpongeBob: May we ask you some questions about the incident?
• Old Lady: I suppose so.
• SpongeBob: When was the last time you saw your pearls?
• Old Lady: Last night. I'm not sure what time, but they were on the table next to the lantern. I don't know how someone could have gotten in here without me hearing them!
• SpongeBob: Was your door locked last night?
• Old Lady: Yes. I lock it when I go to sleep. I leave it unlocked otherwise, assuming people will be courteous enough to knock before bragging in. Apparently, I was wrong on that count.
• SpongeBob: Thanks! Well, nice talking to you!
• Old Lady: Yes! A pleasant mindless break for me as well.
• SpongeBob: Those are strange holes. They look like wood-rot, but it's too dark to see down them. If only I had more light... Hi!
• Red: What are you doing in my room?
• SpongeBob: I'm looking into the disappearance of some pearls.
• Red: Oh, yeah? Nice. So what's it got to do with me?
• SpongeBob: Well, I was hoping I could ask you some questions about it...
• Red: Fine. Only, don't take too long. I'm busy guy. Lots of irons in the fire, you know.
• SpongeBob: Where were you last night?
• Red: I stayed in. It was kind of stormy last night, kicked up all sorts of fog over the plains. I didn't want to get caught out there.
• SpongeBob: You didn't leave your room at all?
• Red: I didn't say that. I said I stayed in. I went to the lobby and read a magazine for a while, and may have wandered around the halls a bit. But I didn't leave the hotel.
• SpongeBob: Did you see anything or anyone suspicious while you were walking around?
• Red: Not particularly. The manager was asleep in his desk. Aside from him I didn't run into anybody.
• SpongeBob: The manager was asleep? At his desk?
• Red: Yeah, snoring quite loudly, in fact. Made it difficult to read. I almost woke him up, but on second thought realized he's even more annoying when he's awake.
• SpongeBob: Anything else can you think of that might help? Nothing unusual happened last night at all?
• Red: Well, now that you mention it, I heard quite a bit of noise before I went to sleep coming from beneath the floorboards. Sounded like something dragging.
• SpongeBob: Dragging sounds...hmm.
• Tenant: That's what I said.
• SpongeBob: Do you know what all these holes in the floor are?
• Red: I don't know what caused 'em... But, the other day I saw an oyster pop out of one of 'em. It must have seen me, cause it ducked back inside immediately.
• SpongeBob: I see... Thanks! Welp nice talking to you!
• Red: Don't let the door hit you on the way out.
• SpongeBob: Hi, it's me again!
• Hotel Manager: Oh, the sheer luck with which I have been graced! Someone fan me, I may faint.
• SpongeBob: Do you know one of your tenants had some pearls stolen form her?
• Hotel Manager: Yes. Victoria Ellen in Room One. How could I not know - she has made quite a stink about it.
• SpongeBob: May I ask you some questions about the crime?
• Hotel Manager: If you must.
• SpongeBob: Where were you on the night of yesterday?
• Hotel Manager: I was here. At the desk. The same place I am, every night. And every day. I don't sleep well.
• SpongeBob: Mmhmm... I see. And did you see anyone suspicious come through the lobby?
• Hotel Manager: Let me think. Red came through in the early evening. He's staying in Room Two. Strange person, but he pays his bill on time, which is more than I can say for Victoria.
• SpongeBob: Hmm. Nobody else?
• Hotel Manager: Well... Um... Alright, alright, I confess! I cannot withstand your incisive and brutal questioning! I did it! I took her pearls! Just please no more of these vicious questions!
• SpongeBob: Really? You did it?
• Hotel Manager: No. I was kidding. What are you, some kind of Knucklehead McSpazmatron?
• SpongeBob: Barnacles!
• Patrick: Umm... SpongeBob?
• SpongeBob: Yes, Patrick?
• Patrick: I'm think I'm gonna stay out here.
• SpongeBob: Why?
• Patrick: I um... I err... I'm afraid of caves!
• SpongeBob: But you live under a rock!
• Patrick: And?
• SpongeBob: Well, I mean, a cave, a rock...
• Patrick: Are you saying my house is like a cave?
• SpongeBob: Oh, not really! Slightly cave-ish, maybe?
• Patrick: I'm going to pretend like I didn't hear it.
• SpongeBob: Okay, okay, have it your way. Wait here, I won't be long. Hi. Are you lost?
• Explorer: Hardly. One cannot be lost when one is at home. I am Charles Oscar William Piedmont Augustus Winthorp, and the world is my backyard. From the Marianas Trench to the Great Barrier Reef, wherever I go home follows.
• SpongeBob: Are you a Superhero?
• Charles: No. I am an explorer.
• SpongeBob: Pretty long introduction for someone who's not a superhero. Did you know your initials are COWPAW?
• Charles: Yes, it is a fact that the baser intellect never fails to point out.
• SpongeBob: And people say I have a silly name.
• Charles: Do they? How interesting.
• SpongeBob: What is this cave?
• Charles: This is the entrance to the Crustacean Caverns! An ancient set of caves that protect the Focusing Orb!
• SpongeBob: Orb, huh?
• Charles: Yes!
• SpongeBob: Neat.
• Charles: It's more than neat. The Focusing Orb points out safe passage through the Abyssal Plains! They are quite impossible cross without consulting it.
• SpongeBob: Ooo! The Abyssal Plains! That's where we need to go!
• Charles: Well, in that case, you'll need to get past the Corridors of Confusion!
• SpongeBob: Corridors of Confusion, huh?
• Charles: Yes! And beyond them, you must consult the Pool of Deception! And then finally, the Doors of Deception!
• SpongeBob: Did you make up these names?
• Charles: Possibly. But, I assure you, they are most descriptive.
• SpongeBob: Can you possibly lend me your flashlight?
• Charles: Well...I suppose you can borrow it. Now don't break it! It is precious!
• SpongeBob: Gimmie, gimmie!
• Charles: Use it well!
• SpongeBob: Tell me about the Corridors of Confusion.
• Charles: They are a series of passages. Each one glows a different color, and in order to pass them, you must enter them in the order that they light up!
• SpongeBob: Sounds kinda silly.
• Charles: Yeah, it is kinda silly now that you mention it. But it's the only way to get to the Pool of Perception!
• SpongeBob: Tell me about the Pool of Perception.
• Charles: It's a pool deep in the heart of the cavern that, legend has it, tell you your future when you gaze into it!
• SpongeBob: I can tell you your future, if you like. I see years of therapy...
• Charles: Hey, I didn't make up the legend.
• SpongeBob: Tell me about the Doors of Deception.
• Charles: I don't know much about them. I have not, as yet, had the privilege of studying their legends. I'm sure they're quite dangerous.
• SpongeBob: Good luck with your expedition! I've gotta go.
• Charles: Yes. Off with you.
• SpongeBob: Ahh, that's better. Say... It looks like there's another room under here! I wonder how I can get there? Maybe the manager knows. Well, well, well, we have come to a conclusion from our investigation!
• Hotel Manager: Pray tell, I'm all ears. Can't wait to hear it.
• SpongeBob: There is somethin giving under the hotel that comes in through holes in the floors of your rooms! I think this creature may have taken Mrs. Ellen's pearls.
• Hotel Manager: No... It can't be! I knew something like this might happen!
• SpongeBob: Something like what?
• Hotel Manager: Well, then I brought the land for this hotel, there was an old oyster bed here... I didn't think it would make a difference... But maybe just maybe...
• SpongeBob: Oysters, huh? May I have permission to check under the hotel?
• Hotel Manager: Oh yes, this is all my fault! Check, check!
• SpongeBob: These look like Mrs. Ellen's strong of pearls! The little guy must have thought they were his. I'd better return them to her! Wow, this little guy sure has collected a lot of stuff! Here are your pearls, Mrs. Ellen! Sems a ragamuffin oyster came in through the holes in your floor and made off with them! I boxed him off his ears and sent him to bed without supper! He shan't darken your door again!
• Victoria Ellen: Oh, thank you so very much, young man! These were a gift from my darling first husband., Edward. They mean so much to me!
• Patrick: Ask her about the reward, ask her about the reward!
• SpongeBob: Patrick! That isn't very polite!
• Patrick: Oh - sorry! Please ask her about the reward, please ask her about the reward!
• Victoria Ellen: Well, you boys certainly deserve a reward! Here, take this Orb. I don't need it now that I have my pearls back.
• SpongeBob: Hooray! A reward! I thought that guy said there'd be lights in here!
• Voice: Welcome to the Confounding Corridors of Crustacean Caverns! Follow the lights, or you will surely be lost! Enter each Corridor in the order it lights up! A mistake will lead you back to the beginning! Only through concentration can you hope to make it to the Inner Sanctum of the Crustacean Caverns!
• SpongeBob: Uh... Okay. Guess I'd better pay attention. Hmm. I must have taken the wrong corridor. Let's try this again. I'll remember this sequence this time. Hooray! It worked! Hi. Whoa, you're old, aren't you?
• Robed Man: Indeed I am, but what I lack in youthful vigor I make up for in tact.
• SpongeBob: I'm not sure what 'tact' is, but I'm pretty sure I've got more of it then some old foagie!
• Robed Man: Who can argue with that logic?
• SpongeBob: Say, you wouldn't by any chance know a way to cross the Abyssal Plains, would you?
• Robed Man: Actually, I do. The Inner Sanctum lies beyond the doors here. In it is a device that uses sunlight to illuminate a path through the fog of the Abyssal Plains.
• 'SpongeBob: Great! I am sooo there!
• Robed Man: I cannot let you in. The Focusing Orb has been stolen. Those doors must remain locked until the Orb is returned.
• SpongeBob: Focusing Orb?
• Robed Man: Yes, it aims and intensifies the light. The Inner Sanctum does not function without it. It would be of no use to you.
• SpongeBob: Who stole it?
• Robed Man: I don't know! Nobody can get to the Inner Sanctum without passing by me, and nobody did! But if you find it, I will allow you passage beyond these doors.
• SpongeBob: Saaaaay... Nice swimming pool.
• Robed Man: That is not a swimming pool! That is the Pool of Perception! Looking into its depths gives you a vision of your own future!
• SpongeBob: Is it heated?
• Robed Man: No.
• SpongeBob: Well, then call it whatever you like, I call it LAME!
• Robed Man: Charming.
• SpongeBob: Look! I got the Focusing Orb! Go me! Go me!
• Robed Man: Ahh, excellent! I will open the doors for you. Beyond them you will face another puzzle before getting to the Inner Sanctum. Once you have passed it, place the Orb on the pedestal. Then the fog will lift.
• SpongeBob: Great! Thank you, oh ancient one.
• Robed Man: I'm 52.
• SpongeBob: Wow! And I thought only coral lived that long. Okay, let's give this Pool of the Future a try. What was that supposed to be? Hey, older person, this thing doesn't seem to be working! What was that supposed to be? Hey, older person, this thing doesn't seem to be working! ...Or does it? This looks familiar.
• Voice: Welcome to the Confounding Corridors of Crustacean Caverns Part Two: The Revenge!
• SpongeBob: Part one was waaaay better.
• Voice: Follow the lights, or you will surely be lost!
• SpongeBob: I knew the pink door was the right one! It's some kind of crazy pedestal thing. There's a place something round on top, but there's nothing in it! Wow! It's like magic! Without the rabbit. Ooo! The light cuts through the fog! We should follow it!
• French Narrator: Having conquered the trench, SpongeBob and Patrick have a swagger in their step, knowing that the worst is behind them. Unfortunately, they do not realize how true that is for an assassin is stealthily tracking them. Hired by Plankton to stop their meddling, he has been gaining ground on them steadily.
• Dennis: I'll get you, Yellow Guy.
• SpongeBob: We gotta push on, Patrick! We're making good time!
• Patrick: My feet hurt.
• SpongeBob: Mine too! We can't let it get to us, though! We're men!
• Patrick: Hey, maybe we should go see that guy!
• SpongeBob: In pain? Come see Doctor Louie. He'll make you guys feel better!
• Patrick: I'm in pain! I'm in pain!
• SpongeBob: I dunno, Patrick. Doctors are SVAAAARY.
• Patrick: Maybe he has lollipops!
• SpongeBob: You make a good point. In pain? Come see Doctor Louie. He'll make you guys feel better. Somehow that's not so comforting.' Hi there, big fella!
• Marius: You want something, no?
• SpongeBob: You are quite possibly the largest starfish I've ever seen.
• Marius: Yes. It is my genes.
• SpongeBob: But those genes have a size 46 waist! Hah, hah!
• Marius: Grrr...
• SpongeBob: Erm...Ha, ha? A little denim humor.
• Marius: Don't push it.
• SpongeBob: Do you know what's going on here?
• Marius: Of course I do! I am a soldier in the revolutionary army! I fight for all invertebrates everywhere. Well, when can I say 'Fight', I mean stage protests. But it is every bit as noble.
• SpongeBob: If you guys are protesters, shouldn't you have signs and be charming slogans and stuff?
• Marius: That's what I said. But our leader, Octavio, said it's better we just stand around outside this here place looking mean.
• SpongeBob: And you know, you do that VERY well! Okay, I'm gonna go!
• Marius: Viva la revolucion!
• SpongeBob: Good afternoon, ma'am!
• Receptionist: Hi. Can I help you?
• SpongeBob: I'm here to see the doctor!
• Receptionist: That's nice. Do you have an appointment?
• SpongeBob: Not as such.
• Receptionist: Hmm, well, he's a pretty busy guy.. Let me see what I can do. What's your name?
• SpongeBob: SpongeBob SquarePants!
• Receptionist: No, seriously.
• SpongeBob: SpongeBob SquarePants.
• Receptionist: Do your parents not like you?
• SpongeBob: They love me! Why?
• Receptionist: Just curious. Anyway, what species are you?
• SpongeBob: I'm a Sponge!
• Receptionist: A Sponge, huh? Well, I'm sorry Mr. SquarePants, but Dr. Louie is a chiropractor.
• SpongeBob: Yep!
• Receptionist: Well, a chiropractor deals with bones... The backbone or spine.
• SpongeBob: Uh-huh!
• Receptionist: Well, how can I put this, you are an invertebrate!
• SpongeBob: Yup!
• Receptionist: So... You have no spine. No bones. How can you be treated by a back doctor if you have no back?
• SpongeBob: Very carefully?
• Receptionist: No, I'm sorry! Unless you have a spine, you cannot see Dr. Louie.
• SpongeBob: Barnacles. Isn't there ANY way I can see Dr. Louie?
• Receptionist: Yeah, there is a way. Get a spine. Then I'll pencil you in.
• SpongeBob: Good day to you, ma'am!
• Receptionist: Bye.
• SpongeBob: Hey, guys, what's going on?
• Jacques: We are protecting unfair treatment at the hands of the chiropractic overlords!
• SpongeBob: What's a chi-ro-prac-tic?
• Jacques: A chiropractor is a doctor who treats the back and spine. And we are not going to take the injustice they deal any longer!
• SpongeBob: Oh. I don't have a spine. I'm a sponge! So, I guess I can't join you guys.
• Jacques: You are speaking the nonsense! We are all invertebrates at this rally none of us have spines!
• SpongeBob: Oh. Well then, what good is a chi-ro-prac-tor?
• Jacques: You are missing the point. We are protesting the RIGHT to see this chiropractic charlatan. None of us actually WANT to see him, we just want the right to do so!
• SpongeBob: Patrick! This sounds like a job for two MEN!
• Patrick: Squidward and Mr. Krabs?
• SpongeBob: Uh, no.
• Patrick: Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy?
• SpongeBob: Nope.
• Patrick: I give up, I give up!
• SpongeBob: You and me, Patrick! It is our duty as men to help these people iron out their differences!
• Patrick: Oh! You just reminded me of something really important!
• SpongeBob: What's that?
• Patrick: I think I left the iron on at home!
• SpongeBob: Sigh. So WE decided to help YOU come to an agreement! Take me to your leader!
• Jacques: Ha, ha. Marius, get a load of the yellow one! He wants to see Octavio! Hahahaha!
• Marius: Hahaha! As if anyone off the streets can demand to see Octavio!
• SpongeBob: Octavio?
• Jacques: Yes. He is the Generalissimo of the invertebrates! And he dose not see just anybody! He is a busy man, he does not have time to chit-chat with the riff-raff.
• SpongeBob: Does he have time to fiddle-faddle with the Flim-Flam?
• Jacques: I do not ask him about his personal business.
• SpongeBob: So what would I need to do to get to see Octavio?
• Jacques: Well, I would need proof that you are serious about helping our cause. If you could bring a peace offering from the despicable Dr. Louie then I think we could do business.
• SpongeBob: I'm on it!
• Jacques: Viva la revolucion!
• SpongeBob: Hi! Did you grow since we last talked?
• Marius: You bore me.
• SpongeBob: Hiiiii! It's me again!
• Jacques: Mon dieu! Don't scare me with your infectious happiness.
• SpongeBob: Hello, shopkkeper!
• Storekeeper: Hey.
• SpongeBob: Say, this is an interesting store you have here.
• Storekeeper: Yeah well, it serves its purpose.
• SpongeBob: You don't carry Kelpo by any chance, do you?
• Storekeeper: Not hardly. The only food we have comes in can.
• SpongeBob: Ooo! Canned food! My favorite! Do you know about the Frackas going on outside Lumbar Louie's?
• Storekeeper: Yeah, as a matter of fact. That guy is no good. I've got a half a mind to march over there and how him just how spineless we really are!
• SpongeBob: Well, I don't know, I mean, he's a back doctor, and we don't have backs... What's the point, really?
• Storekeeper: What is this talk! You're an invertebrate! I expect better of you! I'm very disappointed. Sheesh.
• SpongeBob: I'm sorry! I didn't mean it!
• Storekeeper: Don't let it happen again.
• SpongeBob: I spoke with the, uh, movement, and they told me to come have a word with your leader!
• Storekeeper: I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about.
• SpongeBob: You know, the Generalissimo.
• Storekeeper: Sorry, kid, you're barking up the wrong kelp stalk.
• SpongeBob: Viva la revolucion!
• Storekeeper: Excuse me?
• SpongeBob: Nice talking to ya! I gotta go!
• Storekeeper: Okay.
• SpongeBob: That sea urchin won't miss one little spine. He's got hundreds! So. Guess who has a spine?
• Receptionist: Not you, you're a sponge.
• SpongeBob: Wrongo! What is this?
• Receptionist: Uh... It's a Sea Urchin Sponge.
• SpongeBob: Exactly! So lemme in, I'm gonna go see the doctor!
• Receptionist: You have missed the point entirely.
• SpongeBob: Patrick, did not this kind lady say earlier that if I got a 'spine' I could see Dr. Louie?
• Patrick: He did! She did! I heard her!
• SpongeBob: And I do believe this is a spine! Ergo, therefore, and thusly, you should honor your word!
• Receptionist: Ugh. I don't get paid enough for this. Fine. Give me a moment.
• SpongeBob: Patrick, we are quite possibly the smartest creatures living under the sea.
• Patrick: Did you see her? She was all confused! Hahaha - it must be hard being so stupid. Whoa, wait a minute - we lie under the sea??
• Receptionist: Okay. You can see Dr. Louie now.
• SpongeBob: Hooray! Hiya, doc!
• Lumbar Louie: Hello. What seems to be the problem?
• SpongeBob: I'm here to talk about the protest you have going on outside!
• Lumbar Louie: Oh, that. Yeah. Those guys are kinda getting on my nerves, but the big one - he scares me. Always looking at me kinda shifty and stuff.
• SpongeBob: Why won't you treat them?
• Lumbar Louie: Hey, I'd be happy to treat them if that's what they want. Wouldn't help them, of course, being that they are boneless, but I'll do what I can. The problem is, they're pretty touchy. Especially their leader.
• SpongeBob: I spoke with a member of the revolution, and he said if I could bring him a peace offering, he'd help me reach Octavio!
• Lumbar Louie: Really? That's good news!
• SpongeBob: Got anything I can bring them?
• Lumbar Louie: Um... You can take my stethoscope, you think that'll do?
• SpongeBob: Maybe! Thanks! Hiiii! It's me again!
• Lumbar Louie: You're lucky I have lots of patience and very few patients.
• SpongeBob: So the word on the street is that you're from Egypt, and you lack motivation.
• Lumbar Louie: Excuse me?
• SpongeBob: Yep. I know about it. You're a Cairo slacker.
• Lumbar Louie: Chiropractor.
• SpongeBob: Tomato, tomahto. Let's not mince words.
• Lumbar Louie: I'm a chiropractor, and you're a Sponge. You have no bones, so I really can't help you. I'm not sure why Whitney let you in here.
• SpongeBob: You aren't sure, huh? Well, I've got news for you! Your flunkies have failed you! You're all alone! Your kingdom is crumbling at your feet!
• Lumbar Louie: You seem rather excitable. Perhaps I should prescribe a sedative.
• SpongeBob: I'll say! Okay, I'm gonna go!
• Lumbar Louie: Keep pushing the fluids!
• SpongeBob: I got a peace offering from the doctor!
• Jacques: Hmm. This will do just fine, I believe. I will tell you the password to get past Octavio's personal guard. But it will not be enough. You will need to wear the outfit of la revolucion! Talk to my friend Marius. He has an extra one.
• SpongeBob: Okay! What's the password?
• Jacques: The password is 'Sticks and stones can't break our bones, cause we don't have any!'
• SpongeBob: More like a passphrase, really.
• Jacques: Whatever.
• SpongeBob: Your friend over there said that you had an extra black turtleneck that I could wear.
• Marius: I do. You can have it, but I'm afraid it won't fit.
• SpongeBob: Thanks! Nu-uh. Not even close. Hi. Whatcha doing?
• Quack in Top Hat: Looking for something!
• SpongeBob: Watcha looking for?
• Quack in Top Hat: My socks!
• SpongeBob: Huh?
• Quack in Top Hat: I forgot to take my socks off before I got into the pool! They came off while I was in there, and now I can't find 'em.
• SpongeBob: Maybe I could help you find them!
• Quack in Top Hat: Nah, don't bother. I mean the hot wayer probably shrunk 'em down to nothing anyway. What good are socks that don't fit anymore?
• SpongeBob: I'm sorry!
• Quack in Top Hat: Hey, they're only socks. Not like I lost my hat or anything.
• SpongeBob: Good point! Well, good luck!
• Quack in Top Hat: Thanks.
• SpongeBob: Ha! The hot water-shrunk the black turtleneck! Now it's just my size. The hot water shrunk the turtleneck. It's just my size now! Hello once again, shopkeeper!
• Storekeeper: Yeah.
• SpongeBob: Take me to ze leader! I have ze password! And ze uniform!
• Storekeeper: What's the password?
• SpongeBob: Sticks and stones can't break our bones... Cause we don't have any.
• Storekeeper: Correct! Viva la revoluction! Octavio is down the ladder in the back.
• SpongeBob: Thanks! Hooray! It worked! So... Octavio. We finally meet.
• Octavio: Apparently.
• SpongeBob: You are a hard man to get in to see.
• Octavio: Octavio must protect himself. There are people who would see Octavio hurt. You are not one of those people who would betray Octavio, are you?
• SpongeBob: No! SpongeBob would never betray Octavio, SpongeBob swears!
• Octavio: Octavio believes you.
• SpongeBob: I like this room! You know why?
• Octavio: Because to rage against the dying lights stirs your soul to its core? Because a mighty beast lies dormant within your heart, and Octavio awakens that beast with the smell of injustice, a smell cologne can cover, not even one that costs five dollars?
• SpongeBob: Well, I was just gonna say, cause it has a ladder. And ladders are fun.
• Octavio: Octavio weeps for the youth.
• SpongeBob: Hey, your answer was good too! SpongeBob comes with a peace offering from Dr. Louie! He wants to offer you his services. Right now he's trapped in his office. He's afraid Marius is going to step on him.
• Octavio: Heh, heh, heh. He just might. So you are telling me Dr. Louie is prepared to treat invertebrates?
• SpongeBob: Yes! And he gave me this stethoscope to give to you as a sign of peace.
• Octavio: A stethoscope, huh?
• SpongeBob: Uh... Yeah?
• Octavio: Dr. Louie offers is noble adversary Octavio a STETHOSCOPE?
• SpongeBob: Ah... Well...
• Octavio: This is MOMENTOUS! This is like a warrior offering up his trident! Perhaps Octavio misjudged Dr. Louie! I must set up meeting with this man at once!
• SpongeBob: Whew!
• Octavio: And you, yellow one. Octavio offers his heartfelt thanks! Without you, who knows what madness we might have descended into!
• SpongeBob: Hey, SpongeBob is more than happy to help!
• Octavio: A thousand thanks. I will go meet this great healer at once! Viva la revoluction!
• French Narrator: Proving that no good deed goes unpunished, Dennis the hitman catches up with SpongeBob and Patrick. Just when it seems they will be crushed underfoot, a giant boot crushes Dennis, saving our heroes. But it is out of the frying pan and into the fire as this mysterious benefactor of a foot turns out to be a hideous giant Cyclops. The Cyclops easily captures SpongeBob and Patrick who heroically pass out immediately. When they regain consciousness, it doesn't take much to realize that they are in a load of trouble. Help them escape their most dangerous predicament yet.
• SpongeBob: Patrick! Where are we?
• Patrick: Kansas?
• SpongeBob: Hmm. I don't think so. But whatever we are, we'd better st - Whoa! It's the Cyclops!
• Patrick: Maybe he wants to be friends with us?
• SpongeBob: I wouldn't bet on it! The heat is so intense from this lamp... I can't move!
• Patrick: Tell me about it.
• SpongeBob: This doesn't look good, Patrick.
• Patrick: You mean we're not gonna - Get the crown, save the town and Mr. Kraaaaabs...
• SpongeBob: I don't think we're even going to be able to save ourselves, buddy. I guess what everyone said about us is true, Patrick.
• Patrick: You mean that we're attractive?
• SpongeBob: No, that we're just kids. A couple of kids in way over their heads. We were doomed from the start. I mean, look at us -- we didn't even come close to the crown. We let everybody down... We failed.
• Patrick: Shell City.
• SpongeBob: Yeah, we never made it to Shell City.
• Patrick: Shell City.
• SpongeBob: Exactly, buddy, that's the place we never got to.
• Patrick: Shell City!
• SpongeBob: Okay, now you're starting to bum me out, Patrick.
• Patrick : No, look at the sign! Shell City - Marine Gifts and Sundry!
• SpongeBob: Shell City's a gift shop? But, if this is Shell City, then where's the Cr-c-c-c-c-c... Crooowwwwwn! Pat, we did make it. Ooooooo.
• Patrick: SpongeBob, buddy! Don't die! We've come so close! I've got to find a way to bring SpongeBob back to life! He needs water, and fast! I can't reach the bowl. I'll have to find another way to get water to SpongeBob. Conchs. Just the skeletons, though. Ow! That hurt my belly. Looks like everything spilled out of the lunchbox! It's an onion! Well, a piece of one, anyway. It's making me tear up a it. There you go, little buddy! Let my tears give you life! (Sobbing)
• SpongeBob: P-p-p-patrick?
• Patrick: Oh, SpongeBob! SpongeBob! You're alive! Oh hooray, hooray! I'm so happy!
• SpongeBob: Um, Patrick?
• Patrick: Yes, SpongeBob?
• SpongeBob: Could you stop crying all over me?
• Patrick: Oh! Sure, buddy!
• SpongeBob: Whoa! What's going on?
• Patrick: It's raining.
• SpongeBob: Patrick, your tears shorted out the heating lamp and set off the sprinklers! Now's our chance to get out of here!
• Patrick: In this weather?
• SpongeBob: Let's go!
• Patrick: I always knew it paid to be a crybaby.
• SpongeBob: Patrick! It's the crown!
• Patrick: Yeah. We did it!
• SpongeBob: Come on, let's grab it and get outta here! Hooray! The Crown!
• Patrick: Well, THAT was easy.
• SpongeBob: No, actually, it wasn't.
• Patrick: Yeah, but, that's what I mean't though.
• SpongeBob: They should be all okay now that the sprinklers are on! Go Patrick! Go SpongeBob! We made it, Patrick! Now we just need to find a way to get back to Bikini Bottom.
• Patrick: Oh, don't worry, SpongeBob! We can ride the......!
• SpongeBob: Ride the whatinoff?
• Patrick: The.....! A mythical beast with a chest of iron, and some hair too, and he roams the beaches looking for people in trouble! We just have to find the whistle.
• SpongeBob: The whistle?
• Patrick: Yeah. The Call of the......! It's a chrome whistle, and when you blow it, he comes and saves you! Hooray!
• SpongeBob: Sounds kind of crazy.
• Patrick: It is! Hooray!
• SpongeBob: I guess we don't have much choice... Okay Patrick, let's find that whistle and ride that......!
• Patrick: Hooray!
• SpongeBob: It's a shell. It's kind of shovel-shaped. Hi there! Whatcha doing?
• Treasure Hunter: I'm searching for buried treasure! You'd be surprised at how much stuff people lose at the beach.
• SpongeBob: No, I wouldn't! Found anything?
• Treasure Hunter: Yeah, I spotted something a little ways over there... I marked it with an 'X'. It's noting valuable, though. My metal detector says it's made of chrome.
• SpongeBob: Gold, huh?
• Treasure Hunter: Yep! Gold is where it's at, my man!
• SpongeBob: I'll take your word for it. If you don't want that chrome thing can I have it?
• Treasure Hunter: Sure! All you have to do is dig it up. I marked where I saw it with an 'X'.
• SpongeBob: Thanks! What are you doing out of water?
• Treasure Hunter: What are YOu doing out of water?
• SpongeBob: I asked you first.
• Treasure Hunter: I'm a mudskipper. I can go for days out of water. Can yoy?
• SpongeBob: Nope!
• Treasure Hunter: Well, then!
• SpongeBob: Well, then indeed! I'm gonna go!
• Treasure Hunter: Happy hunting!
• SpongeBob: The ocean! My home! Who knows what unspeakable horrors lurk in there? I , for one, do not intend to find out. It's a piece of driftwood. Seems pretty strong. Looks like an 'X'. We have to find a quicker way to get home than just swimming back. We'd never make it in time.
• Patrick: What about the......?
• SpongeBob: Oh, Patrick. Don't be silly. No one believes in the.....!
• Patrick: I know a guy, who knows a guy, who knows a guy whose cousin once saw a picture of a......Footprint in the sand!
• SpongeBob: Really? That's enough evidence for me! How can we reach him?
• Patrick: The Call of the ......
• SpongeBob : The wha?
• Patrick: I have heard the Call of the...... And it is good.
• SpongeBob: Makes sense, Patrick!
• Patrick: Well, the guy I know says you just have to call him.
• SpongeBob: I wonder what his number is...
• Patrick: Seven?
• SpongeBob: Well, have to find some way to get home quickly, with or without the...... It's a puddle of tar. It's really sticky. I got tar on the driftwood! Hooray! It worked! Ah-hah! Patrick! It's t-t-the... the CALL OF THE......!
• Patrick: No!
• SpongeBob: I tell you, it's true!
• Patrick: Blow it, blow it!
• SpongeBob: Calm down, Patrick. I will!
• French Narrator: With an ear piercing squeal. The call of... reverberates across the coast. Seconds later, it produces the desired effect as a glimmering and guerdon... jogs into view. He offers to give them a ride back to Bikini Bottom on his muscular back. Upon arriving over Bikini Bottom...... shoots SpongeBob and Patrick down to the seafloor using his massive chest muscles. It doesn't take long for them to realize that Plankton has been up to no good while they were gone. Everyone in Bikini Bottom appears to be his under control. Including King Neptune himself. SpongeBob and Patrick must find a way to break Plankton's hold over the citizens by any mean necessary.
• SpongeBob: We're back, Patrick! And just in time! Now all we have to do is give Neptune back his crown! Come on!
• Patrick: Um, I think I'm gonna stay here. That's Perch Perkins over there, you know! He might want to interview me!
• SpongeBob: Uh - okay... I'll be back as soon as I give Neptune his crown!
• Patrick: Right!
• SpongeBob: I don't think Perch is in the right frame of mind for an interview. Hi, music maker!
• Musician: Hey there, little dude!
• SpongeBob: Do you know 'I Lift Up My Tentacle and I Say Tweet-Tweet?'
• Musician: I can't say I've ever that one, man.
• SpongeBob: I'll let you get back to your pickin!
• Musician: Okay, pal. Catch you on the Flip-Flop!
• SpongeBob: Squidward? Not you, too!
• Squidward: All hail Plankton!
• SpongeBob: King Neptune! We got your crown back! Can you please let Mr. Krabs go now?
• King Neptune: All hail Plankton!
• SpongeBob: This isn't working out like I'd hoped. He's just chillin'. I don't need to go in there right now. Plankton! What's going on here? What have you done?
• Plankton: Heh, heh, heh... What's it look like? I've taken control of the citizens of Bikini Bottom! I've transformed them into my own personal bucket head army! They are now - say - what's that smell?
• SpongeBob: Um - I think absorbed some......sweat.
• Plankton: Ew. Anyway, bottom line - you lose. And you know why?
• SpongeBob: Cause you cheated?
• Plankton: No, not because I cheated. Because I'm an evil genius. And you're just a kid - heh, heh - a stupid kid! Aha ha, ha, ha!
• SpongeBob: I may be a kid, but I'm not gonna let you get away with this.
• Plankton: Listen to yourself! You even talk like a kid. 'I'm not gonna let you get away with this!' What do you think this is - a game of kickball on the playground? You never had a chance to defeat me!
• SpongeBob: Well, I'm not giving up yet!
• Plankton: Good! I enjoy watching you, Flounder. Give it your best shot, kid.
• SpongeBob: Hi again, minstrel!
• Musician: Can't escape the melodic allure, can you? Yeah.
• SpongeBob: Hi. Pretty awful what Plankton's done around here, isn't it?
• Musician: Huh? Wha? Sorry, man. I've been so lost in a grove that I haven't noticed anything! What's goin' on?
• SpongeBob: He's got the whole town wearing his bucket-helmet things, and they have like an antenna thing on the top that let's him control their thoughts!
• Musician: Whoa. Wait a minute. Are you telling me he has Sub-crypto-alpha-wave enhancers built into a cranial matrix?
• SpongeBob: I dunno - am I?
• Musician: Dude, this is SERIOUS, man. We have to find a way to channel the power of rock to disrupt his mind control signal!
• SpongeBob: How can we do that?
• Musician: Well. We need an amplifier.
• SpongeBob: Don't you have one right there?
• Musician: Yeah, but this little thing isn't gonna cut it without some modification. I need you to bring me a larger speaker.
• SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs has one in the storage room! He was going to use it to play music throughout the Krusty Krab with subluminal messages in it urging people to buy more stuff. Don't think the irony is lost on me.
• Musician: And there's one other thing we're gonna need. A reverse polarity sub-etha frequency emitter.
• SpongeBob: You're joking.
• Musician: No. We need it to tune in to the extra frequency that Plankton uses to control these buckets. It looks like a little light bulb.
• SpongeBob: Where am I gonna go find one of those?
• Musician: Well, Plankton has to have one, or he couldn't generate the frequency to begin with. So I guess that means.
• SpongeBob: ...I have to go into the belly of the beast. The Chum Bucket.
• Musician: It won't be easy.
• SpongeBob: Nothing worth doing ever is. Never fear. I will bravely face the dangers of the Chum Bucket for the greater good!
• Musician: Wow, you sounded like Clint East whale just then!
• SpongeBob: A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. So I gotta get a reverse-party-submarine-freak-mit?
• Musician: Close enough! It looks like a little tight bulb. And it's probably near whatever equipment Plankton is using to control these buckets!
• SpongeBob: Forks! You can never have too many! The speaker! This will do nicely. Okay, here I am. Gotta keep my cool. I just need to get to the kitchen without being spotted... What is this Krabby Patty doing floating in mid-air? That's a bit odd. Uh-oh. I'm not alone...Saaaay...That's a good one looking guy! Somehow, he doesn't look friendly! I need to get to the kitchen doors! And I'd better pick up these Krabby Patties so Plankton can't use them to figure out the secret recipe! And I'd better avoid that robot me while I'm at it! He seems upset about something! Hooray! I made it! Now to get what I came for. Those breakers look like part of Plankton's latest experiment. Maybe he's making a growth formula... Or an eye-sprouting serum... Or both! They're warm and glowy with huggable radioactive waste! That looks like a light bulb! I hope this is the right piece. Why does of the screens say 'Hello, world'? This again? Okay. I gotta get to the doors, pick up the Krabby Patties and avoid the crazy robot me! Ready? Break! Whew! That was close! I got it! I g-
• Musician: All hail Plankton!
• SpongeBob: Oh, no! They got you!
• Musician: All hail Plankton!
• SpongeBob: I guess I'm gonna have to try and rig this thing on my own!
• Musician: All hail Pl-
• SpongeBob: Yeah, yeah. I get it. It's an amplifier! I guess it isn't powerful enough to be of much use as it is, though. It's an ultra cool guitar. I don't think guitar dude will have much use for it anymore. I attached the sub-etha thingy to the amplifier, but it still needs a bigger speaker if I'm really gonna rock with it. I am ready to rock! It's a mega-amplifier! This thing could tear the rust off a sunken ship! Now I just have to plug the guitar in and play my heart out! Say, Plankton? I've been thinking what you said.
• Plankton: Yes? I'm sort of busy here.
• SpongeBob: It's just that - you're right. I'm just a kid.
• Plankton: Of course I'm right.
• SpongeBob: You know, I've been through a lot in the last six days, five minutes, 27 and a half seconds. And if I've learned anything during that time, it is that you are who you are.
• Plankton: That's right.
• SpongeBob: And no amount of mermaid magic, or managerial promotion, or... some other third thing can make me any more than what I really am inside - a kid.
• Plankton: That's great.
• SpongeBob: But, that's okay! Because I did what everyone said a kid couldn't do: I made it to Shell City, and I beat the Cyclops, and I rode the......and I brought the crown back!
• Plankton: All right, we get the point --
• SpongeBob: So, yeah, I am a kid! And I'm also a goofball! And a wingnut! And a Knucklehead McSpazmaltron!
• Plankton: Wh-what's going on here?
• SpongeBob: But, most of all I'm - I'm - I'm -
• Plankton: Settle down! S-s-settle!
• SpongeBob: I'M A GOOFY GOOBER!
• Plankton: A what?!?
• SpongeBob: Let's rock! I've got to get the notes of this song right, or it won't destroy Plankton's mind-control helmets! Wait, wait! I messed up! Okay, let's rock! Yeah! Feel the grove! Yeah! Uh-huh! Get your grove on! Yeah! Feel the grove! Whoops! I hit a wrong note! I think something's happening!
• French Narrator: And so SpongeBob uses the power of rock 'n' roll to overcome evil. He is avail his own is died. King Neptune freed from his bucket received the crown with gratitude and releases Mr. Krabs from his prison of ice. Plankton is removed from circulation and placed in a suitable institution. Patrick is finally interviewed by Perch Perkins. Mindy earns the respect of her father. Who will never ever again dismiss her council of Wisdom and compassion although he is fairly insisting that someone rot in the dungeon for a thousand eternities. And SpongeBob? The kid? The Wingnut? The Knucklehead McSpazmaltron? Well, that's Manager McSpazmaltron to you.
• SpongeBob: Yeah!
• French Narrator: The End.