Artist Unknown/transcript: Difference between revisions
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{{EpisodeTranscript}} | {{EpisodeTranscript}} | ||
{{L|''[The episode begins at the Adult Learning Center as grades (9-15th grade).]''}} | |||
{{L|Squidward|Ah, how I have dreamed of this day. Mr. Tentacles, Professor of Art. What a marvelous opportunity for the people of Bikini Bottom. Bring me your huddle masses of bored house wives and I will shape them into my image! ''[wife's head turns into Squidward's and the husband notices]'' I'll go down in history. Someday, there will be a wing with my name on it in all the museums of the world!}} | {{L|Squidward|Ah, how I have dreamed of this day. Mr. Tentacles, Professor of Art. What a marvelous opportunity for the people of Bikini Bottom. Bring me your huddle masses of bored house wives and I will shape them into my image! ''[wife's head turns into Squidward's and the husband notices]'' I'll go down in history. Someday, there will be a wing with my name on it in all the museums of the world!}} | ||
{{L|Janitor|Dude, you're teaching art at the Rec Center. Calm down.}} | {{L|Janitor|Dude, you're teaching art at the Rec Center. Calm down.}} | ||
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{{L|Squidward|''[starry-eyed]'' It's beautiful! ''[a tear falls from his eyes; snaps out of it]'' I mean... this isn't a sculpture. ''[SpongeBob's lip starts quivering]'' A good sculpture takes... more time. You can't just sculpt Willie-Nillie. You've got to go by the book. Follow the rules. ''[SpongeBob wipes away a tear]'' Otherwise, you'll never get passed Amateur Hour, here. Besides, you've got the nose wrong. ''[Squidward puts a nose like his on the sculpture]'' There, now it's art.}} | {{L|Squidward|''[starry-eyed]'' It's beautiful! ''[a tear falls from his eyes; snaps out of it]'' I mean... this isn't a sculpture. ''[SpongeBob's lip starts quivering]'' A good sculpture takes... more time. You can't just sculpt Willie-Nillie. You've got to go by the book. Follow the rules. ''[SpongeBob wipes away a tear]'' Otherwise, you'll never get passed Amateur Hour, here. Besides, you've got the nose wrong. ''[Squidward puts a nose like his on the sculpture]'' There, now it's art.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|''[breaking down]'' Ohhh, it's so obvious. I would've never thought of that. I'm sorry, Squidward. I came here to learn and I arrogantly shunned your lessons. ''[falls down and starts crying]'' I'll never be a great artist like you! I don't deserve your tutoring. I don't deserve to be in your presence. ''[crawls over to the front door and looks back at Squidward]'' I don't even deserve to use your doors! ''[the doors open, hitting SpongeBob out the window into the garbage dumpster head-first]''}} | {{L|SpongeBob|''[breaking down]'' Ohhh, it's so obvious. I would've never thought of that. I'm sorry, Squidward. I came here to learn and I arrogantly shunned your lessons. ''[falls down and starts crying]'' I'll never be a great artist like you! I don't deserve your tutoring. I don't deserve to be in your presence. ''[crawls over to the front door and looks back at Squidward]'' I don't even deserve to use your doors! ''[the doors open, hitting SpongeBob out the window into the garbage dumpster head-first]''}} | ||
{{L|Monty|Hello, there.}} | {{L|Monty P. Moneybags|Hello, there.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|But I did deserve that. ''[the dumpster closes on top of him]'' I deserved that, too. ''[garbage man takes SpongeBob to dump]'' And I deserve this!}} | {{L|SpongeBob|But I did deserve that. ''[the dumpster closes on top of him]'' I deserved that, too. ''[garbage man takes SpongeBob to dump]'' And I deserve this!}} | ||
{{L|Monty|Good day, sir.}} | {{L|Monty|Good day, sir.}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Sorry, class dismissed. You're too late.}} | {{L|Squidward|Sorry, class dismissed. You're too late.}} | ||
{{L|Monty|Oh, I beg your pardon, but I've forgotten my manners. My name is Monty P. Moneybags.}} | {{L|Monty|Oh, I beg your pardon, but I've forgotten my manners. My name is Monty P. Moneybags.}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|The world famous art collector?}} | {{L|Squidward|The world-famous art collector?}} | ||
{{L|Monty|The one and only.}} | {{L|Monty|The one and only.}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Well, what are you doing here?}} | {{L|Squidward|Well, what are you doing here?}} | ||
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{{L|Squidward|Anything?! ''[Squidward imagines himself with hair, then he runs off to Monty in excitement]'' It's me. It's me. I'm responsible.}} | {{L|Squidward|Anything?! ''[Squidward imagines himself with hair, then he runs off to Monty in excitement]'' It's me. It's me. I'm responsible.}} | ||
{{L|Monty|I can see it now. Your name in the world's most prestigious museums. I'm gonna make you, immortal! Now, uh, help me get this in the car.}} | {{L|Monty|I can see it now. Your name in the world's most prestigious museums. I'm gonna make you, immortal! Now, uh, help me get this in the car.}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|I could use a little help. ''[sculpture's head hits the top of the doorway and breaks off, then the head makes a watery tear. The head now turns into rubble]'' My fame! My fortune! My hair!}} | {{L|Squidward|I could use a little help. ''[sculpture's head hits the top of the doorway and breaks off, then the head makes a watery tear of Squidward crying. The head now turns into rubble]'' My fame! My fortune! My hair!}} | ||
{{L|Monty|Well, that's a bit a bad luck right there. But, this shouldn't be a problem for an artist of your magnitude. You can whip up another one.}} | {{L|Monty|Well, that's a bit a bad luck right there. But, this shouldn't be a problem for an artist of your magnitude. You can whip up another one.}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Yeah, no problem. You know, between you and me, this isn't my best work. Why don't you come back tomorrow and I'll have something that will really knock your socks off.}} | {{L|Squidward|Yeah, no problem. You know, between you and me, this isn't my best work. Why don't you come back tomorrow and I'll have something that will really knock your socks off.}} | ||
{{L|Monty|Between you and me, I'm not wearing socks. ''[laughs]''}} | {{L|Monty|Between you and me, I'm not wearing socks. ''[laughs]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Yeah, no socks. OK, see you tomorrow. Bye. ''[closes the door as Monty walks out]'' I gotta find SpongeBob! ''[ | {{L|Squidward|Yeah, no socks. OK, see you tomorrow. Bye. ''[closes the door as Monty walks out]'' I gotta find SpongeBob!}} | ||
{{L|''[Bubble transition to the Bikini Bottom Dump, where Squidward is looking for SpongeBob.]''}} | |||
{{L|Squidward|SpongeBob... SpongeBob? SpongeBob!}} | |||
{{L|SpongeBob|''[muffles inside the Kelpo cereal box flat on his back]'' Go away, Squidward. I don't deserve your kindness.}} | {{L|SpongeBob|''[muffles inside the Kelpo cereal box flat on his back]'' Go away, Squidward. I don't deserve your kindness.}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Hey, cheer up. I have decided to give you another chance. Why, with a great teacher like me, anything is possible.}} | {{L|Squidward|Hey, cheer up. I have decided to give you another chance. Why, with a great teacher like me, anything is possible.}} | ||
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{{L|SpongeBob|Wow.... ''[pause]'' Really?}} | {{L|SpongeBob|Wow.... ''[pause]'' Really?}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Let's go.}} | {{L|Squidward|Let's go.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|''[notices a painting in the dump]'' Squidward, look. It's ol' Bold and Brash!}} | {{L|SpongeBob|''[notices a painting in the dump surrounded by flies]'' Squidward, look. It's ol' Bold and Brash!}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Gimme that. ''[back | {{L|Squidward|Gimme that.}} | ||
{{L|''[Bubble transition back to the classroom, as Squidward pushes a marble in place.]''}} | |||
{{L|Squidward|Ok, SpongeBob. Just do what you did before.}} | |||
{{L|SpongeBob|''[attempts to chisel the marble but hesitates]'' I... can't!}} | {{L|SpongeBob|''[attempts to chisel the marble but hesitates]'' I... can't!}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Ah, ah. Wait, wait. Let me help. Let's start with the circle again.}} | {{L|Squidward|Ah, ah. Wait, wait. Let me help. Let's start with the circle again.}} | ||
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{{L|SpongeBob|With this tool, I shall give birth to art.}} | {{L|SpongeBob|With this tool, I shall give birth to art.}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Oh, boy.}} | {{L|Squidward|Oh, boy.}} | ||
{{L|''[SpongeBob taps marble with the chisel; it shatters into a pile of rubble; Squidward is | {{L|''[SpongeBob taps marble with the chisel; it shatters into a pile of rubble; Squidward's smile (while trying to keep in his insanity) is frozen in place]''}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|But, one more thing. ''[puts a stone nose shaped like Squidward's nose on it]'' There. Now it's art. Well, what do you think, Squidward? Just take it all in for a moment. Let it soak in.}} | {{L|SpongeBob|But, one more thing. ''[puts a stone nose shaped like Squidward's nose on it]'' There. Now it's art. Well, what do you think, Squidward? Just take it all in for a moment. Let it soak in.}} | ||
{{L|''[Squidward tries to keep in his insanity with a smile while he jitters, but then he screams with frustration and goes insane. He kicks two marbles, eats a part of a marble, takes four paint tubes and squeezes them, kicks a picture, takes a marble and repeatedly smashes it into the floor, and starts smashing the other marbles the same way. While Squidward is destroying things, two Squidwards in the American Gothic painting form look at each other as they watch Squidward go ballistic. A marble butt flies over SpongeBob]''}} | {{L|''[Squidward tries to keep in his insanity with a smile while he jitters, but then he screams with frustration and goes insane. He kicks two marbles, eats a part of a marble, takes four paint tubes and squeezes them, kicks a picture, takes a marble and repeatedly smashes it into the floor, and starts smashing the other marbles the same way. While Squidward is destroying things, two Squidwards in the American Gothic painting form look at each other as they watch Squidward go ballistic. A marble butt flies over SpongeBob]''}} | ||
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{{L|''[As Monty and the janitor walk into the building, it is revealed that when Squidward smashed all of the marble together, he created an even better sculpture than the first one and left without even seeing it]''}} | {{L|''[As Monty and the janitor walk into the building, it is revealed that when Squidward smashed all of the marble together, he created an even better sculpture than the first one and left without even seeing it]''}} | ||
{{L|Monty|''[to janitor]'' You, sir, are the greatest artist who ever lived!}} | {{L|Monty|''[to janitor]'' You, sir, are the greatest artist who ever lived!}} | ||
Latest revision as of 10:53, 22 May 2025
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