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{{EpisodeTranscript}}
|Title=Atlantis SquarePantis
{{L|''[We see a live traffic jam on a busy expressway. Patchy is in one of the cars in it. He is also wearing sunglasses.]''}}
|Season=5
{{L|Patchy|Let's go! ''[honks his horn]'' Hey, kids. Rush hour traffic here in Encino is a real bringdown. ''[grumbles in frustration]'' A little music should soothe me jangled nerves. At least my in-dash hi-fi still works. ''[Patchy puts a cassette tape in the radio, which breaks and the music stops. Patchy shows the broken cassette tape.]'' Oh! Me ultra-rare "Frampton Comes Alive" 8-track destroyed! ''[Tosses it into the car]'' And I'm gonna miss the new SpongeBob cartoon if this traffic doesn't move soon! ''[Patchy growls and cries while he moans. Patchy's cell phone rings. The ringtone is SpongeBob's flute from the theme song]'' Who's calling? ''[answers the phone]'' Yes, Patchy here. Start squawkin'.}}
|Episode=91
{{L|Potty|''[squawks]'' Hey, Patchy, the new SpongeBob cartoon's about to start. Where are you, brawk?}}
|Airdate=[[November 12]], [[2007]]
{{L|Patchy|Stuck on the 101. Be a dear and record it for me, would you?}}
}}
{{L|Potty|Oh, I threw out that old Betamax machine in the garbage. ''[squawks]''}}
Patchy: Let's go! (Patchy honks)
{{L|Patchy|You what?!}}
 
{{L|Potty|Oh, calm down, beardy.}}
Patchy: Hey, kids. Rush hour traffic here in Encino is really bad.
{{L|Patchy|Potty, you know how important this cartoon is to me! ''[Someone honks his horn at Patchy]'' Do you mind?! I'm trying to talk to my parrot! ''[The man looks at Patchy in shock as Patchy gets back on his phone to talk to Potty]'' Sorry, Potty. Just some landlubber. ''[Potty hangs up]'' Potty? Hello, hello, hello, hello?! ''[looks at his phone's screen. It says "call dropped" with a Jolly Roger symbol. Patchy groans]'' Dropped again. ''[Patchy closes his phone]'' Curse this traffic! ''[the traffic starts moving again]'' Ooh! ''[Patchy pulls up his anchor, much to the man's confusion. Patchy drives into a desert-like area]'' Arrgh! Home at last! What the...? ''[his eyes pop out from behind his pair of sunglasses, breaking them]'' Encino... it's gone. No...! ''[Patchy cries]'' You know, kids, this kinda reminds Patchy of an old story. Another story of a... lost city. Why don't you check it out? Oh, Encino. ''[he continues sobbing, and the episode starts. SpongeBob and Patrick are blowing bubbles]''}}
 
{{L|Patrick|A beautiful specimen, SpongeBob.}}
Patchy: A little music should calm my jangled nerve. Here's how my dash-in-stereo works. (Patchy breaks his radio)
{{L|SpongeBob|Hurry, Patrick, hurry! ''[Patrick takes a photo of the bubble and it pops]'' How's it look, buddy? Ready for the old scrapbook?}}
 
{{L|Patrick|More like the scrap-heap. ''[throws the photo into a big pile]'' They never come out right! Oh, well, let's try again.}}
Patchy: Oh! Me ultra-rare-back-on-track destroyed!
{{L|SpongeBob|Okay, Patrick, this one's gonna be a masterpiece.}}
 
{{L|Patrick|I'm ready. ''[SpongeBob blows a bubble in his image]''}}
Patchy: And I'm gonna miss the new SpongeBob cartoon if this traffic doesn't move soon! (Patchy cries)
{{L|SpongeBob Bubble|Hi, Patrick!}}
 
{{L|Patrick|''[takes a photo of the bubble but when he does, it pops]'' I missed it again! This darn camera isn't fast enough! ''[stomps on the camera]''}}
Patchy: (Patchy's cell phone rings) Who's calling?
{{L|SpongeBob|Hold on a second, Patrick! It's not the poor camera's fault you can't get a photo.}}
 
{{L|Patrick|It's not?}}
Patchy: Yes, patchy, here, start talking.
{{L|SpongeBob|No, it is the very nature of the fragile bubble.}}
 
{{L|Patrick|It is?}}
Potty: Hey, patchy, the new spongebob cartoon is about to start.
{{L|SpongeBob|Yes, it is, my friend. Allow me to demonstrate. ''[blows a bubble in the shape of a microphone and starts singing]'' ♪ The sun must set at the end of every day. ♪ ''[the sun sets and pops]'' ♪ And the curtain must fall at the end of every play. ♪ ''[a curtain made of bubble soap drops down behind Patrick and pops. SpongeBob floats up on a bubble. He is surrounded by lots of other bubbles]'' ♪ And every little bubble ever blown must someday pop. ♪ ''[all of the bubbles pop. SpongeBob falls]''}}
 
{{L|Patrick|♪ Like presents on Christmas Day, it doesn't seem to stay. Or a cheese soufflé, it doesn't last all day. ♪}}
Potty: Where are you, brawk?
{{L|SpongeBob|♪ I will try again... ♪}}
 
{{L|Backup Singers|♪ Try again... ♪}}
Patchy: Stuck on the 101. Be a dear and record it for me, will you?
{{L|SpongeBob|♪ ...To blow a bubble... ♪}}
 
{{L|Backup Singers|♪ To blow a bubble... ♪}}
Potty: Oh, I threw out the machine in the garbage, brawk!
{{L|SpongeBob|♪ ...That will last all day. ♪}}
 
{{L|Backup Singers|♪ To blow a bubble that will last...♪}}
Patchy: You what?!?
{{L|Patrick|♪ ...All day. ♪ ''[SpongeBob begins to blow a giant bubble. The bubble captures them both and floats away]'' Um, SpongeBob?}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Not now, Patrick. This bubble's gonna break all records!}}
Potty: Oh, calm down, beauty.
{{L|Patrick|I hope it doesn't break until we get a little closer to the ground.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Huh? ''[gasps]'' What have I done?! ''[The two start crying for help as the bubble drifts into a cave]'' We're never gonna get out of here!}}
Patchy: Potty, you know how important this cartoon is to me!
{{L|Patrick|No! ''[the bubble is popped by a jagged point of half a broken amulet]'' What happened?}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|''[pointing to broken amulet]'' That's what happened.}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Whoa, what is it? It looks really old.}}
Patchy: (Someone honks at patchy) Do you mind? I'm trying to talk to my parrot!
{{L|SpongeBob| Antis, what do think that means, Patrick?}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Antis, Antis...SquarePantis! Probably belonged to your ancient ancestors. ''[Picks up the half of the amulet]'' SpongeBob SquarePantis, you must wear the ancient crest of your ancestors, for it is your birthright! ''[shoves it into SpongeBob's face]''}}
Patchy: Sorry, potty. Just some land lover.
{{L|SpongeBob|''[Falling]'' My birthright?! Ow, ooh, ow, ooh, ow! Let's take this to the Bikini Bottom museum, they'll know what it is!}}
 
{{L|''[cut to museum]''}}
Patchy: Potty? Potty? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello?
{{L|Mr. Krabs|''[Whistles]'' Oo... uh... beautiful day for standing outside a museum doin' nothin'.}}
 
{{L|Security Guard|Whatever you say.}}
Patchy: Guah. Dropped again. (Patchy closes his phone) Ahh!
{{L|Mr. Krabs|''[pretends to be administration]'' Hello there. Welcome to the museum! That'll be three dollars.}}
 
{{L|Old Lady|But I thought it was free Tuesday.}}
Patchy: Curse this traffic! Oooooh! (Patchy grunts)
{{L|Mr. Krabs|No, no, no. Today's Monday. Otherwise I wouldn't be wearing this "I hate Mondays" shirt.}}
 
{{L|Old Lady|Good point.}}
Patchy: Ahh, home at last. What the? (His eyes break the sunglasses)
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Enjoy the artifacts! ''[mutters under breath]'' Don't stand in one place too long, people might mistake you for one. ''[Hears SpongeBob laughing]'' SpongeBob! ''[hides, then re-emerges when SpongeBob and Patrick go into the museum]'' Hew, that was a close one. ''[old lady points him out to a police officer then Mr. Krabs runs inside]''}}
 
{{L|Squidward|Neptune's ascension. The only surviving painting from the great lost city of Atlantis. This is just what the doctor ordered, Squiddy. Spending your day studying the Atlantean masters. And best of all, no Sponge... ''[SpongeBob and Patrick run in excitedly, knocking Squidward over]'' Oh, would you two watch were you're-- ''[gasps]'' What is that? What are you doing with the amulet of Atlantis?}}
Patchy: Encino, it's gone...Noooooooooooooooo! (Patchy cries)
{{L|SpongeBob|We were just...}}
 
{{L|Squidward|You're going to steal it?!}}
Patchy: You know, kids, this reminds patchy of a story.
{{L|SpongeBob|No. Squidward, we'd never--}}
 
{{L|Squidward|This is a new low, even for you two! Lucky for you, I was here today. Stealing artifacts could land you in the stony loneso... ''[Sees the amulet's half was still there and is dumbfounded]''...ome?! You boobs found the missing half of the Atlantean amulet?}}
Patchy: Another lost city. Why don't you go check it out?
{{L|SpongeBob|What's an Atlantean omelet?}}
 
{{L|Squidward|Amulet, not omelet! It's the key to untold riches!}}
Patchy: Oh no, Encino.
{{L|''[Mr. Krabs shoves SpongeBob and Patrick over violently and faces Squidward.]''}}
 
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Did somebody say untold riches?}}
SpongeBob and Patrick are blowing bubbles.
{{L|Squidward|Yes, Eugene. The streets are lined with gold, and the street lamps are made with diamonds.}}
 
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Diamond light bulbs! I wonder what they make the money out of.}}
Patrick: A beautiful Specimen, SpongeBob
{{L|Squidward|For reasons unknown, this great city disappeared one day, but no ruins were ever found. All the inventions that you take for granted, were given to us by the Atlanteans. Their advances in art, financial wealth and weaponry were eons ahead of their time!}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Why is this bubble painted on the mural?}}
SpongeBob: Hurry Patrick, Hurry! (Patrick takes a photo of the bubble)
{{L|Squidward|That's just the oldest living bubble.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|The oldest living bubble alive? ''[shoves Patrick in front of it]'' Behold, Patrick! The oldest living bubble!}}
SpongeBob: Ready for the old scrapbook?
{{L|Patrick|This is the most beautiful bubble I've ever seen.}}
 
{{L|Squidward|That's just a painting, you quarter-wit! ''[to Mr. Krabs]'' Quarter-wit. Ha, it's less than half. The real bubble lives in Atlantis, some dumb old bubble pales in comparison to the arts...}}
Patrick: More like the scrap-heap. They never come out right! Oh well, let's try again.
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Money!}}
 
{{L|Sandy|''[comes onto the screen from out of nowhere]'' And science! Don't forget science! What's all the hubbub, boys?}}
SpongeBob: Ok, ready Patrick, this ones gonna be my masterpiece.
{{L|Squidward|These two chowder-brains found the missing half of the amulet.}}
 
{{L|Sandy|The Amulet of Atlantis?! Legend says, that when the two halves are joined, the path to Atlantis is opened! What are y'all waitin' on? Let's hitch them two doggies up! Go on, Squidward!}}
Patrick: I'm ready. (SpongeBob blows a bubble in his image.)
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Hurry up, Squidward, that money ain't gettin' any younger! ''[Squidward connects the two halves and a bright light activates. Squidward is happy. Sandy is in disbelief. SpongeBob and Patrick exclaim excitedly.]''}}
 
{{L|Patrick|''[laughing]''}}
SpongeBob Bubble: Hi, Patrick!
{{L|SpongeBob|Hoo-hoo, yeah, hoo-hoo-hoo!}}
 
{{L|''[A bus drops from the ceiling]''}}
Patrick: (Misses a photo of the bubble) Oh I missed it again! Well, this darn camera isn't fast enough.
{{L|Squidward|The magical path to Atlantis is a van?}}
 
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Nice hot rod flames!}}
SpongeBob: Stop! Its not the poor cameras fault you cant get a photo
{{L|Patrick|''[Coin spins and attaches itself to the bus]'' What's it doing? ''[The door to the van opens. We fade to black, then to the bus opening again. Sandy looks inside]''}}
 
{{L|Sandy|Well, holly-wally ding-dang-doo! Would ya look at that?! Take a gander, y'all!}}
Patrick: It's not?
{{L|Squidward|Fabulous decor!}}
 
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Quite a vessel, but who's manning it?}}
SpongeBob: No, it's the very nature of the fragile bubble.
{{L|Robot|Greetings. Welcome aboard the Sea Ship Atlantis. This is a nonstop trip, so please take a seat, relax, and we'll be on our way.}}
 
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Bet there's some loose change in here!}}
Patrick: It IS?
{{L|SpongeBob|Ah, so this is what luxury feels like.}}
 
{{L|Squidward|Ah, what I wouldn't give for a foot-rub.}}
Spongebob: Yes it is my friend, allow me to demonstrate.
{{L|Robot|Attention, passengers. Regretfully, we lack the fuel needed for forward motion.}}
 
{{L|All|What?!}}
Song
{{L|''[later, we see them all pushing the bus to the gas station. Mr. Krabs takes the hose and tries to fill up the bus with gas, but can't find the gas tank]''}}
 
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Is this some kind of joke? Where's the gas tank?}}
SpongeBob:The sun, must set: at the end of every day. The curtain, must fall: at the end of every play. And every little bubble ever blown must some-day, POP!
{{L|Robot|We Atlanteans find the use of fossil fuels to be counter-intuitive, and have developed an alternative source we call song.}}
 
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Huh?}}
Patrick:Like presents, on Christmas day: it doesn't seem to stay
{{L|Robot|The engine of this vessel is fueled by song. The more you sing of your desires, the closer to Atlantis you will get. Let us commence singing.}}
 
{{L|Squidward|Does that make any sense?}}
Patrick:Or a cheese souffle, it doesn't last all day
{{L|SpongeBob|No, but I'm game for singing any day! ♪Sing? Sing a song? A song of wanting to move along!♪ ''[the van rises up and floats in mid-air. SpongeBob sings off-key]'' ♪To a land where all our dre-e--♪ ''[the van crashes back down]'' Whoops, sorry. ♪To a land where all our dreams... can finally come true.♪ ''[the van rises up high. It makes a hole in the roof]'' ♪A bubble I long for, that so eludes me, but soon enough I will see...♪}}
 
{{L|Mr. Krabs|♪Well, that's just splendid, boy! A land where it rains money! More than you can spend. With fives and tens and fifties and I'll want to be your friend.♪}}
SpongeBob: I will try: again. To blow a bubble, that will last all day.
{{L|Plankton|♪Ha, ha, ha. Such a valiant desire, he, he, he. The lost weapons of Atlantis - the most advanced of all time. As soon as this dopey song is done, I plan to make them mine...!♪}}
 
{{L|Sandy|♪Did you all hear something? I can hardly believe that there's a lost city where having smarts is more important than being pretty!♪ ''[Sandy pours green slime on herself, and makes a clone of herself, and divides herself into two]'' ♪With all their advanced science, and my painfully large mind!♪}}
Patrick: All day
{{L|Sandy Clone|♪I bet we can figure out how to make wondrous things, like melons with edible rinds!♪ ''[they dig in on the watermelon. Juice gets on the screen and transitions to Squidward playing piano]''}}
 
{{L|Squidward|♪As a connoisseur of fine art, I'm proud to say! I've always seen things in my own special way! 'Art'-lantis, with their glorious aesthetics, I'll copy their style in a while, my art will be prophetic!♪}}
[SpongeBob begins to blow a giant bubble, it captures them both and floats away]
{{L|Patrick|♪I'm Patrick, I'm Patrick, Patrick-Patrick-Patrick! And I like, um, uh,..♪ ''[record scratches]'' I don't know what I like.}}
 
{{L|Robot|Warning: You have run out of song fuel.}}
Patrick: Um, SpongeBob
{{L|All|''[Everyone huddles together and screams until Squidward looks out the window]''}}
 
{{L|Squidward|Hey, look, it's Atlantis!}}
SpongeBob: Not now, Patrick, this bubble's gonna break all records!
{{L|SpongeBob|Pretty!}}
 
{{L|All|''[They continue to scream and the bus smashes through a city wall of Atlantis. We see that it has futuristic blue and purple buildings with spires and bubbles. The bus suddenly skids to a stop, unearthing some trees in the process. The five emerge from the bus.]''}}
Patrick: I hope it doesn't break until we get a little closer to the ground
{{L|Squidward|You dimwits haven't even been here two minutes and you've already messed up someone's topiary garden!}}
 
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Go on, SpongeBob. Ring the bell.}}
SpongeBob: What? [Gasps] What have I done!? (The two start screaming as the bubble drifts into a cave and is popped by a jagged point on a half of a broken amulet)
{{L|SpongeBob|Ring for the king, huh? ''[rings the bell. A red carpet comes down the stairs and Lord Royal Highness comes out]''}}
 
{{L|Lord Royal Highness|Welcome to Atlantis. I've been expecting you. ''[Falls down the stairs]'' Allow me to introduce myself. I am the Lord Royal Highness, but my friends call me LRH.}}
Patrick: What happened?
{{L|SpongeBob|My friends call me SpongeBob. I'm here to see the oldest living bubble.}}
 
{{L|LRH|Yes, of course.}}
SpongeBob: (pointing to broken amulet) That's what happened
{{L|Mr. Krabs|What a ripoff! This street ain't gold!}}
 
{{L|LRH|Oh, if it's gold you want, you'll find it in our vault.}}
Patrick: Whoa, what is it? It looks really old.
{{L|Mr. Krabs|I'm Eugene. I like money.}}
 
{{L|LRH|Yes, I can see that. Pleasure to meet you. Come, I'll give you the grand tour of our Atlantean fortress. I'm so glad you're all here.}}
SpongeBob; Antis, what do think that means, Patrick?
{{L|Plankton|They're gone. Now to get to those weapons... ''[tries to open the glovebox door, but fails]'' Trapped! Okay, what do I have to work with here? What's this? Owners manual!? Looks like I found my escape route! ''[Laughs diabolically]'' Ow!}}
 
{{L|LRH|For centuries, we Atlanteans spent, nay, wasted our talents and energy building the most sophisticated weaponry to defend ourselves from invaders. But we abandoned the idea of warfare long ago and now all these weapons gather dust behind this locked door as an example of what must be done if one wishes to live in harmony with all creatures of this, or any, world.}}
Patrick: Antis, Antis...Squarepantis! Probably belonged to your ancient ancestors. (Picks up the half of the amulet) SpongeBob Squarepantis, you must wear the ancient crest of your ancestors for it is your birth right! (shoves into SpongeBob's face)
{{L|Mr. Krabs|''[sighs]'' Eh, harmony, schmarmony. When do we get to see the treasure?!}}
 
{{L|LRH|But of course, follow me.}}
SpongeBob: (Falling) My birth right! Ow ooh, Ow ooh ow! Let's take it to the bikini bottom museum, they'll know what it is!
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Comin' through, boys!}}
 
{{L|Plankton|These Atlanteans leave a room full of the most advanced weaponry unguarded? No wonder they got lost. ''[Squeezes under door]'' Oh, my! There will be no one to stop me this time! ''[Laughs diabolically. Patchy reappears, he is still in a desert area, he looks around, but Encino's missing, and his sunglasses still broke]''}}
Mr. Krabs: (Whistles) Oo...uh...beautiful day for standing outside a museum doin' nothin'.
{{L|Patchy|Well, bad news, kids. Encino's still lost. ''[The radio starts playing]'' Oh! But at least I got me radio fixed! ''[Patchy snaps his fingers while listening to it, then it explodes]'' Well, enjoy the rest of the show. ''[cuts back to Atlantis and then cuts to LRH giving the tour]''}}
 
{{L|LRH|It is both an honor and a pleasure to welcome you to Atlantis. We haven't had visitors in some time. You see, being in a lost city has certain disadvantages which I digress. Now if you follow me, I'll show you some of our grandest achievements.}}
Security Guard: Whatever you say.
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Squidward! You told me the streets were paved with gold! Now that street light better be a 600 karat diamond or else. ''[Mr. Krabs gets on Squidward's neck and starts unscrewing a lightbulb]'' Ah, hold still, Squidward!}}
 
{{L|Squidward|You're standing on my neck!}}
Mr Krabs: (Mr Krabs pretends to be administration) Hello there. Welcome to the museum! That'll be three dollars
{{L|''[They trip and the light bulb smashes.]''}}
 
{{L|LRH|Are you all right?}}
Old Lady: But I thought it was free Tuesday?
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Yeah, but I feel odd.}}
 
{{L|''[Mr. Krabs starts acting strange]''}}
Mr Krabs: No no no. Today's Monday, otherwise I wouldn't be wearing this 'I hate Mondays' shirt.
{{L|SpongeBob|Mr. Krabs? You okay?}}
 
{{L|''[Mr. Krabs sniffs]''}}
Old Lady: Good point
{{L|Mr. Krabs|I'd know that smell anywhere. ''[Pockets have mouths and start barking like dogs]'' Me pockets! They be smellin' loot! Whoa, whoa, whoa!}}
 
{{L|''[His pockets drag him into the hall of Treasure and start taking the treasure]''}}
Mr. Krabs: Enjoy the artifacts! (Mutters under breath:) Don't stand in one place too long, people might mistake you for one.
{{L|LRH|Those pockets of yours certainly have a nose for treasure.}}
 
{{L|Mr. Krabs|These are me houndstooth pants.}}
Mr. Krabs: (Hears SpongeBob laughing) SpongeBob! Hew, that was a close one. (Old lady points him out to a police officer then Mr. Krabs runs inside)
{{L|LRH|What you see here is a glimpse of ancient Atlantean history. Long ago we abandoned our obsession with wealth to focus on the pursuit of knowledge. So help yourselves to as much as you pockets can carry!}}
 
{{L|Mr. Krabs|As much as me pockets can carry?! ♪Oh, if I'd only known when I woke up today, I'd have stopped at me tailors along the way, and had ten more pockets put on me pants, 'cause I think I hear a money avalanche!♪ ''[yodeling]'' ♪Look at all this cash, hey, look at all this money! I hope me heart can take it!♪ ''[goes unconscious]''}}
Squidward: Ah, Neptune's ascension. The only surviving painting from the great lost city of Atlantis. This is just what the doctor ordered, Squiddy. Spending your day studying the Atlantean masters. And best of all, no Sponge... (SpongeBob and Patrick run in excitedly, knocking Squidward over.)
{{L|Medic Fish|Clear! ''[shocks Krabs]''}}
 
{{L|Mr. Krabs|♪I'm alright, sonny! Industrial accidents can make quite a mess. Unless you fall into a money press. Oh, make me into money, Mr. wonderful machine, I always knew that me true color was green! Oh, ever since I was a little kid, I dreamed of such a place, yes I did! With mountains of money, and rivers of cash. And a pool of coins to make a splash! Oh, I'll open up a Krusty Krab with patties made of money. They'd be delicious, and expensive, and taste like golden honey! Money and gold and treasure untold! And all of it for me!♪}}
Squidward: AAAAAHHHHH! Oh, would you to watch were you're (Gasps) What is that? What are you doing with the amulet of Atlantis? (Gasps) Were you going to steal it!?
{{L|LRH|Mr. Krabs, we're off to see the bubble, would you care to join us?}}
 
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Are you kiddin'?! I just got here!}}
SpongeBob: No Squidward, we'd never....[Cut off by Squidward
{{L|LRH|Very well then. Off we go.}}
 
{{L|Patrick|SpongeBob, when are we gonna see the bubble?}}
Squidward: This is a new low, even for YOU TWO. Lucky for you, I was here today. Stealing artifacts could land you in the stony loneso...ahh! ahh! ahh! ome! You boobs found the missing half to the Atlantean amulet!
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, shh!}}
 
{{L|LRH|Don't dally, lads. You don't wanna be left behind do you?}}
SpongeBob: Uh, whats an Atlantean omelet?
{{L|SpongeBob|No, sir. Come on along, Patrick.}}
 
{{L|Sandy|You know, LRH, I was born with a scientific curiosity and I was wonderin' if I could get a peek at some of your scientific achievements?}}
Squidward: AMULET, NOT OMELET!!!! It's the key to untold riches!
{{L|LRH|Of course, Miss Cheeks, here we are, the combination of all our technology. I give you the Atlantean Hall of Science.}}
 
{{L|''[Opens a large door]''}}
[Mr Krabs shoves Spongebob and Patrcik over violently and faces Squidward] Mr Krabs: Did somebody say untold riches!?
{{L|Sandy|Hoppin' acorns! Look at all this high-tech gear! ''[Looks at an invention]'' What does this gizmo do?}}
 
{{L|LRH|It's a biomass converting device. It can take any household object-- this comb, for example-- and turn it into say, ice cream. Would anyone like to try?}}
Squidward: Yes Eugene. The streetes are lined with gold, and the street lamps are made with diamonds.
{{L|Both|Oh, me, me, me, me, me, me!}}
 
{{L|LRH|Go ahead!}}
Mr Krabs: DIAMOND LIGHT BULBS!!! I wonder what they make the money out of.
{{L|Both|Yay!}}
 
{{L|''[The boys eat the ice cream.]''}}
Squidward: For reasons unknown, this great city dissappeared one day,but no ruins were ver found. All the inventions that you take for granted, were given to us by the Atlanteans. Their advances in art wealth and technology were eons ahead of their time!
{{L|SpongeBob|Comb flavored.}}
 
{{L|Sandy|What else can it turn things into?}}
SpongeBob: Why is this bubble painted on the muirel?
{{L|LRH|Actually it can only turn things into ice cream. We haven't worked out that bug yet but I can show you the most amazing/fantastic device created by Atlantean hands. Behold, this grand machine allows the user to be broken down to nano-stature, enabling them to battle germs hand to hand.}}
 
{{L|Sandy|How's it work?}}
Squidward: That's just the oldest living bubble
{{L|LRH|Please have a seat and I'll explain. Now, here's how it works...}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Hey, cool.}}
SpongeBob: The oldest living bubble, alive! Behold Patrick-the oldest living bubble!
{{L|''[SpongeBob disappears]''}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Where'd SpongeBob go?}}
Patrick: This is the most beautiful bubble I've ever seen!
{{L|LRH|Right now, his molecules are being broken down into data which is assembled in this computer and is stored on these tapes, then re-assembled on a much smaller scale...}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Someone help me!}}
Squidward: That's just a painting you quarter-wit! Ha, quarter-wit, that's less than half. The real bubble lives in Atlantis, some darn old bubble hales in comparison to the art
{{L|LRH|And finally passes through this tube and into this tank which contains every element known to... ''[peers closer]'' Oh, dear heavens! It looks like our scientists were working on a very aggressive case of the sniffles! He could be in trouble.}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Don't worry, SpongeBob. I'm comin' to help you!}}
Mr Krabs: Money
{{L|''[Patrick disappears]''}}
 
{{L|Squidward|Okay, I've seen enough. Let me out of this thing! ''[Squidward disappears and reappears into an 8-bit scene]'' What's going on here? I... Oh no. ''[screams]''}}
(Sandy very suddenly arrives out of nowhere) Sandy: And science, don't forget science. Whats all the hubba boys?
{{L|''[Squidward sees a giant nose]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Squidward, don't make any sudden movements!}}
Squidward: These two chowder heads found the missing half to the amulet of Atlantis.
{{L|''[The nose sneezes germs and Squidward falls over, jumps quickly, and runs.]''}}
 
{{L|Squidward|Help! ''[Screams]''}}
Sandy: THE AMULET OF ATLANTIS!!!! Legend says, that when the two halves are joined, the path to Atlantis is opened! Go on Squidward!
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick follow while they're being chased by germs, and Sandy enters the game]''}}
 
{{L|All|Help, Sandy!}}
Mr Krabs: Hurry up Squidward, that money aint gettin' any younger [Squidward connects the two halves and a bright light activates]
{{L|Sandy|Sounds like them critters is in trouble! ''[The nose catches SpongeBob, Patrick and Squidward, and the germs block Sandy from getting to them]'' Hold on, fellas! I'll be there soon, as soon as I send these critters to their doom! ''[A title screen shows like a Nintendo game]'' ♪Look out, germs. The end is near. Your days are numbered, 'cause Sandy's here! I'll get these germs, and make 'em pay, with some good old-fashioned karate.♪ Hi-yah! ♪If I borrow some elements from the periodic table, I can mix up a brew that is sure to disable any virus, bug, or sniffle that steps into my path. And make them feel my microscopic wrath!♪ Hi-yah! ''[she hits the nose with a submarine and defeats it, the rest of the gang gets saved, they all cheer, then the game says: "Game Over." Everyone is out of the machine]''}}
 
{{L|LRH|Well, shall we continue on with the rest of the tour?}}
Squidward: (Happily)
{{L|Sandy|Y'all head out without me.}}
 
{{L|''[Sandy goes back in the machine again]''}}
Sandy: (In Disbelief)
{{L|LRH|Well then, good luck. Have fun. We'll see you at dinner. ''[To SpongeBob]'' Your friend Sandy certainly is an excitable one.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Quite.}}
Patrick: Aaaaaaaaahhhhhh!
{{L|Squidward|Somehow I knew I'd get stuck with you yahoos the longest.}}
 
{{L|''[The camera zooms in to the heater vent where Plankton is hiding, Plankton chuckles]''}}
SpongeBob: Hoo hoo yeah, hoo hoo hoo!
{{L|Plankton|♪Oh, what a beautiful sight! Weapons as far as the eye can see. But which one will be right for me? How do I pick? Which one will do the trick? Which is best to guarantee eternal rest? So many weapons! How do I choose? Look at this one with a beautiful fuse! And with this one I couldn't lose. That one will surely give them the blues... And this one here matches my shoes!♪ ''[serious tone]'' Come on, Plankton, just pick one and forget about your shoes! Eeny, meeny, minie moe, I pick you, now let's go! ''[jumps into a giant tank's gun. Scene cuts to LRH giving the tour]''}}
 
{{L|Squidward|This stuff is wonderful and all but when are we gonna see some real Atlantean culture?}}
[A van drops from the ceiling]
{{L|LRH|Gentlemen, What is art?}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Oh, oh, I know, I know!}}
Squidward: The magical path to Atlantis is a Van?
{{L|''[Squidward shoves SpongeBob]''}}
 
{{L|Squidward|I thought you'd never ask! Art is the conscious arrangement of elements in a manner that affects a sense of beauty.}}
Mr Krabs: Nice hot rod flames!
{{L|LRH|Not even close! ''[Squidward looks shocked]'' Art is what happens when you learn to dream. ''[Gives SpongeBob a blue paint brush]'' Go ahead. Dream a little.}}
 
{{L|''[SpongeBob touches the wall with the brush and the paint creates SpongeBob's house door]''}}
Patrick: [Coin spins and attaches itself to the van] What's it doing?
{{L|SpongeBob|It looks like my front door!}}
 
{{L|LRH|Behold! The Hall of Arts!}}
Sandy: Well, holly-wally ding-dang-doo. Would ya' look at that!? Take a gander, y'all!
{{L|''[He opens the door, they step in, and Squidward's mouth opens]''}}
 
{{L|Squidward|Incredible! ''[cries]'' The creativity! The artistry! ''[Walks in front of a painting]'' This painting is so realistic! It looks like you could step straight into it.}}
Squidward: Fabulous decor!
{{L|LRH|And you can!}}
 
{{L|''[Throws Squidward into the painting]''}}
Mr Krabs: Quite a vessel, but who's manning it?
{{L|SpongeBob|Whoa!}}
 
{{L|Squidward|This place is amazing! ''[steps into other paintings]'' ♪Isn't this great, isn't this neat, I'm a living work of art from my head to my feet! From the very first drawings on walls in caves, art has been what the heart and soul craves! So pick up a brush, a pencil or pen. If you don't like this one, paint it again! From now on please call me Sir Real. I can wait for your impression to congeal. Take it from an undersea renaissance man. I'd even look great on the side of your van! Any way you carve it, I am art and art is me. Ask your mama or your dada to tell you about the uh, schism between minimalism and cubism. My personality may be of the cynical type, but I've finally found something that lives up to the hype. I can say honestly and with great certainty, that Atlantis is where I want to spend eternity!♪ ''[holds note. Scene cuts when Squidward's out of the painting]''}}
Robot: Greetings. Welcome aboard the seaship Atlantis. This is a nonstop trip, so please take a seat, relax, and we'll be on our way.
{{L|Atlantean|Hey, can you not sing? I'm trying to model here.}}
 
{{L|Atlantean Painter|Now hold on Nando. Why don't you take five. I'm really diggin' this squid's form.}}
Squidward: Ah, what I wouldn't give for a foot-rub.
{{L|''[The other Atlantean sighs and walks away]''}}
 
{{L|Squidward|Looks like I'll be here inspiring these Atlantean art makers with my beauty. You guys go on ahead!}}
Robot: Attention passengers, regretfully we lack the fuel needed for forward motion.
{{L|SpongeBob|Okay. Bye, Squidward!}}
 
{{L|''[They leave and Squidward poses]''}}
Unison: What!?
{{L|LRH|Now this section of town is known for its advances in the science of fondue cooking.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Excuse me, sir, this tour has been great and all, but uh, can we see the bubble now?}}
Mr Krabs: Is this some kind of joke? Wheres the gas tank?
{{L|LRH|Do excuse me. Most folks don't stay with the tour this long. Of course you can. But first, remember this. This bubble is over one million years old. It was brought here when the first Atlanteans colonized this place. Deftly hand carried over billions of light years from our home planet. It is our people's most beloved and treasured ancient relic. But most importantly remember to have fun!}}
 
{{L|''[Points to where the bubble is, and they walk to the bubble]''}}
Robot: We Atlanteans find the use of fossil fuels to be counter-intuitive, and have developed an alternative source we call song.
{{L|SpongeBob|There it is Patrick!}}
 
{{L|Both|The World's Oldest Living Bubble!}}
Mr. Krabs: Huh?
{{L|''[They land on the safe keeping tube]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Look at it, Patrick! So ancient, so floaty. It is the most beautiful, wrinkled up, dusty old bubble I've ever seen!}}
Robot: The engine of this vessel is fueled by song, the more you sing of you desires, the closer to Atlantis you will get. Let us commence singing.
{{L|Patrick|Like a delicate air raisin!}}
 
{{L|''[They slide off the glass]''}}
Squidward: Does that make any sense?
{{L|LRH|Now if you'll excuse me, I have to make ready for tonight's dinner. So I'm just going to leave you two friendly strangers alone with our most beloved ancient and fragile Atlantean relic. Join us in the dining hall when you've had an eye-full!}}
 
{{L|''[LRH leaves]''}}
SpongeBob: No, but I'm game for singing any day! Sing, sing a song, a song of wanting to move along. To a land where all our dre-e. Whoops, sorry. To a land where all our dreeeeeams, can finally come true. A bubble I long for, that so eludes me, but soon enough I will seeeeeeeeeeeeeee............
{{L|SpongeBob|Thank you, Mr. Lord Royal Highness, sir. ''[They shove their faces on the glass]'' Just look at it, Patrick. Ah the stories this bubble could tell. I just wish we could get a closer look. ''[They lean in but the glass moves]'' Patrick! Get the--}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Oh, golly! Oh, I don't know how much longer I can hold this!}}
Mr Krabs: Well that's just splendid boy! A land where we live money! More than you can spend. With fives and tens and fifties and I'll want to be your friend.
{{L|''[They managed to get the glass back after a close call when the bubble land on the glass on SpongeBob's side and bounces off without any harm, they laugh in victory]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Whoo, that was a close one buddy!}}
Plankton: Ha, ha ha. Such a valiant desire-hehehe. The lost weapons of Atlantis-the most advanced of all time. Soon as this dopey song is done I plan to make them miiiiine!
{{L|Patrick|Yeah! We almost popped the most prized possession of all Atlantis-eans! ''[laughs]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Boy, that would have been out greatest blunder without a doubt! But we should go before something bad does happen.}}
Sandy: Did you all hear something! I can hardly believe that there's a lost city where having smarts is more important-than being pretty! With all their advanced science, and my painfully mind!
{{L|Patrick|Ooh! Let's get a picture for our scrapbooks before we leave.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Great idea, Patrick!}}
Sandy #2: [Clone] I bet we can figure out how to make wondrous things, like melons with edible rinds!
{{L|Both|Cheese!}}
 
{{L|''[Patrick's camera flashes, and the bubble pops]''}}
Squidward: As a connoisseur of fine art, Im proud to say! I've always seen things in my own special way! 'Art'-lantis with its glorious aesthetics, I'll cop their style in a while- my art will be prophetic!
{{L|SpongeBob|''[teeth closed]'' Patrick, did you hear something?}}
 
{{L|Patrick|''[teeth closed]'' A sort of a popping sound?}}
Patrick: I'm Patrick, I'm Patrick, Patrick-Patrick-Patrick! And I like um, uuuuh, I don't know what I like.
{{L|SpongeBob|Mmm-hmm.}}
 
{{L|''[They look at each other screaming and their skin peels off, and SpongeBob's eyes fall in his mouth. Scene cuts to the gang having dinner]''}}
Robot: Warning, you have run out of song fuel.
{{L|LRH|So sorry I'm late. The tour ran a little long. So, how are you all enjoying our beloved city?}}
 
{{L|Squidward|I'm never leaving this place. I've learned more about painting in a few hours here than I did in four years of community college.}}
Unison: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
{{L|''[Shows LRH a painting]''}}
 
{{L|LRH|Absolutely marvelous! And Eugene, I assume the hall of treasure was everything you hoped for? ''[Mr. Krabs is brain-washed by the money and talks gibberish]'' And Sandra, how did you find our laboratory?}}
Squidward: Hey look, it's Atlantis.
{{L|Sandy|They are just amazing! I used your invention room to make this!}}
 
{{L|LRH|Splendid. What does it do?}}
SpongeBob: Pretty!
{{L|Sandy|I'll show you. ''[Presses a button, the food goes directly in her stomach and rubs it]'' Now I can eat underwater without removing my helmet! This is just the beginning! I should have a cure for the common cold up and running by tomorrow afternoon with your high-tech lab!}}
 
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick walks in feeling nervous]''}}
Unison: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! [Bus crashes)
{{L|LRH|SpongeBob, Patrick, tell me. How did you enjoy our rarest and most prized possession?}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|''[gulp]'' We have to go back to Bikini Bottom now!}}
Squidward: You dimwits haven't even been here two minutes and you've already messed up someone's topiary garden.
{{L|All|Huh?}}
 
{{L|LRH|Ahahaha! Come. Enjoy the best Atlantean cuisine has to offer before you leave.}}
Mr. Krabs: Go on, SpongeBob. Ring the bell.
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick shakes.]''}}
 
{{L|Squidward|What is wrong with you two morons?}}
SpongeBob: Ring for the king, huh?
{{L|SpongeBob|We have to go home now!}}
 
{{L|Squidward|Why would you want to leave a paradise like Atlantis?}}
Lord Royal Highness: Welcome to Atlantis. I've been expecting you. (Falls down long staircase) Allow me to introduce myself. I am the Lord Royal Highness, but my friends call me LRH.
{{L|SpongeBob|Because, uh, Gary misses me?}}
 
{{L|''[Scene cuts to SpongeBob's house where Gary is having a party with other snails]''}}
SpongeBob: My friends call me SpongeBob. I'm here to see the oldest bubble.
{{L|Patrick|We destroyed your most prized possession! ''[covers mouth]''}}
 
{{L|LRH|''[pauses]'' ''[laughs]'' If there's one thing, we Atlanteans enjoy, it's a healthy dose of dark humor!}}
LRH: Yes, of course.
{{L|SpongeBob|It's not a joke, we burst the bubble!}}
 
{{L|''[Sandy and Squidward gasped.]''}}
Mr. Krabs: What a ripoff! This street ain't gold!
{{L|LRH|''[laughs]'' That's not the real bubble. It's just a prop for the tourists. This is the real deal.}}
 
{{L|''[Holds up the real bubble in a bottle]''}}
LRH: Oh, if it's gold you want, you'll find it in our vault.
{{L|Both|Ooh!}}
 
{{L|''[Patrick takes a picture of the bubble, and the bubble finally pops]''}}
Mr. Krabs: I'm Eugene. I like money.
{{L|LRH|''[furiously snarls]'' Summon the Atlantean Royal Guard! ''[The guards come, and grunt, SpongeBob and Patrick shakes in fear for what they've done]'' Seize these hostile bubble poppers! ''[SpongeBob and Patrick scream and Squidward and Mr. Krabs join them]''}}
 
{{L|Sandy|Don't just stand there! Move!}}
LRH: I can see that. Pleasure to meet you. Come, I'll give you the grand tour of our Atlantean fortress. I'm so glad you're all here.
{{L|''[She pushes the gang, the guards attack with a trident, pickaxe, and mace]''}}
 
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Can't you go any faster Sandy?}}
Plankton: They're gone. Now to get to those weapons... Trapped! Ok, what do I have to work with here? What's this? Owners manual!? Looks like I found my escape route! (Laughs diabolically) Owe!
{{L|Sandy|Maybe, if y'all would use your feet! ''[the gang's feet are skidding the ground]''}}
 
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Never mind. Just keep doing what you're doing.}}
LRH: For centuries, we Atlanteans spent, nay, wasted our talents and energy building the most sophisticated weaponry to defend ourselves from invaders. But we abandoned the idea of warfare long ago and now all these weapons gather dust behind this locked door as an example of what must be done if one wishes to live in harmony with all creatures of this, or any, world.
{{L|''[Sandy groans in annoyance for her friends' laziness and cowardice. The guards shoot clear balls at them, Sandy throws Patrick like a boomerang, Patrick hits the wall]''}}
 
{{L|Sandy|''[grabs Patrick]'' Come on, Patrick!}}
Mr. Krabs: (sighs) Eh, harmony shmarmony. When do we get to see the treasure?!
{{L|''[The guards shoot balls at them, and Sandy uses SpongeBob as a shield.]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|''[laughs]'' That tickles! ''[laughs]''}}
LRH: But of course, follow me.
{{L|Sandy|Hang in there, little buddy! ''[she uses Squidward's tentacles to grab the shooting balls and fires the balls at the guards by pulling Squidward's nose like a gun. Then, she uses Mr. Krabs and he uses his claws to knock the guards out of the way.]''}}
 
{{L|LRH|Don't let them get away!}}
Mr. Krabs: Comin' through, boys!
{{L|''[The guards follow the gang outside the building, but they all see Plankton's giant tank, Plankton aims at them while laughing diabolically. Patchy reappears]''}}
 
{{L|Patchy|''[realizes that there is no water left]'' This is the end of Patchy. No water, no food, and still no Encino. And here come the vultures to pick me bones! ''[Potty flies up]'' Shiver me timbers! It's Potty! I wonder what parrot tastes like... Come back here! Uh-oh. Here come the hallucinations.}}
Plankton: These Atlanteans leave a room full of the most advanced weaponry unguarded? No wonder they got lost. (Squeezes under door) Oh, my! There will be no one to stop me this time! (Laughs diabolically)
{{L|SpongeBob|''[laughs]'' Patchy, it's me. SpongeBob SquarePants. ''[Patchy is excited and laughs weakly]'' Don't lose hope. Everything will be all right when you get to Encino.}}
 
{{L|Patchy|But, Encino is gone.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|It's not gone, if you believe.}}
Patchy: Well, bad news, kids. Encino's still lost.
{{L|Patchy|Believe, believe. ''[falls asleep. Wakes up and reads the sign]'' Welcome to Encino! It's back! ''[hugs the sign]'' SpongeBob was right! All I had to do was believe! ''[laughs cheerfully]''}}
 
{{L|♪You got to believe. It was out of sight. You got to believe. I'm back in Encino. You got to believe. Everything's all right. The sky above, and the ground below. Bring me back into Encino. It was lost, some time ago, I'm just glad to be back home. You got to believe. I'm back in Encino. You got to believe. Everything's all right. You got to believe. I'm back in Encino. You got to believe. Everything's all right.♪}}
Patchy: Oh! But, at least I got me radio fixed! (Patchy snaps his fingers while listening to it, then, it explodes)
{{L|''[Patchy is shown playing an instrumental by a man and woman at a bench, annoying them and making the latter's baby cry. They walk away as the chorus joins back in]}}
 
{{L|♪You got to believe. I'm back in Encino. You got to believe. Everything's all right. You got to believe. I'm back in Encino. You got--♪}}
Patchy: Well, enjoy the rest of the show.
{{L|Patchy|''[drops his ice-cream scoop and we hear strange sounds. Potty squawks, and then pokes Patchy]'' Ow! Ow! It was all a hallucination. Encino's still... gone! ''[Patchy groans]'' Ooh, a sandwich. Potty, you're a lifesaver. ''[opens a sandwich]'' Oh! Oh, Potty, you know I don't like mayo! ''[sees a vulture]'' Here, you want some? Go on. Uh... take it. I don't like the mayonnaise, you know. Once it gets up above 130, 135, the mayonnaise gets kind of... grody, you know.}}
 
{{L|''[cuts to the gang standing in front of the tank]''}}
(Large chunk of transcript missing here!)
{{L|Plankton|''[laughs diabolically]'' Cower to me, fools! I have commandeered the most powerful weapon in the Atlantean arsenal! Now bow before the new king of Atlantis and prepare to taste my wrath! ''[He stomps on the switch, and the switch didn't budge]'' Yeah! Huh? Uh, uh I mean, uh, prepare to taste my wrath! ''[He stomps on the switch rapidly harder, but it still didn't budge]'' Oh, you! ''[Grabs a rock while struggling]'' Prepare to taste my wrath! ''[Throws the rock on the switch, and the switch budged]''}}
 
{{L|Computer|Launch sequence deployed. ''[The tank shakes and Plankton laughs diabolically, everyone gasps, and they hold onto each other. The tank shoots out ice cream instead of missiles and a cow's moo is heard. SpongeBob and Patrick start eating ice cream.]''}}
Patchy: This is the end of patchy. No water, no food, and still no Encino.
{{L|Patrick|Plankton's wrath tastes like ice cream!}}
 
{{L|Both|Thanks, Plankton!}}
Patchy: And here come the vultures the pick me bones! (Potty flies up)
{{L|Plankton|Ice cream? It shoots ice cream?! ''[Plankton jumps out of the tank]'' Oversized ice cream maker! ''[childishly kicks the tank, but hops around in pain]'' Yah! Ouch! Ow!}}
 
{{L|LRH|Look! A talking speck! This talking speck will make a fantastic ''[glares at SpongeBob and Patrick]'' replacement for our recently deflated national treasure. ''[Looks at Plankton]'' ''[Babyish tone]'' Won't you little fella?}}
Patchy: Shiver me timbers! It's potty! I wonder what parrot tastes like...
{{L|Plankton|I'll destroy all of you--}}
 
{{L|LRH|''[squeezes Plankton within his hands]'' Amazing! This is so much better than that dusty old bubble!}}
Patchy: Come back here!
{{L|''[Plankton gets put inside a baby bottle cage.]''}}
 
{{L|Plankton|You haven't seen the last of me! When I get out of here, I'll hunt you all down like a pack of-- ''[someone takes a picture]'' Hey! Can't you read? ''[points at sign]'' No flash photography!}}
Patchy: Uh-oh. Here come the hallucinations.
{{L|''[The Atlantean tourists ignore him and continue taking pictures of Plankton. The gang gets back on the van.]''}}
 
{{L|LRH|So nice to meet you all. I hope you have a safe journey back home. And do come back any time.}}
SpongeBob: (Spongebob laughs) Patchy, it's me. SpongeBob SquarePants. (Patchy is excited, and then he cries)
{{L|SpongeBob|So long. And thanks for the tour.}}
 
{{L|''[Everyone is in, and LRH closes the door, he takes the amulet off the van and gives it to a guard.]''}}
SpongeBob: Don't lose hope. Everything will be all right when you get into Encino.
{{L|LRH|Dispose of this quickly. We can't survive anymore visitors like these.}}
 
{{L|Guard|''[salutes]'' Sir, yes, sir!}}
Patchy: But, Encino is gone.
{{L|''[He runs to the dumpster and throws the amulet in there, LRH waves goodbye as they go off.]''}}
 
{{L|LRH|I thought sponges were supposed to make life easier.}}
SpongeBob: It's not gone, if you believe.
{{L|''[Scene cuts to the bus]'' ''[Everyone is feeling sad, except SpongeBob]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|♪Goodbye, Atlantis. But we really have to go. Back to a little town, that is the greatest place I know-oh-oh-oh-oh! Back to Bikini Bottom! I can hardly wait!♪}}
Patchy: Believe, believe. (Falls asleep)
{{L|Mr. Krabs|♪But what about the treasure? It was really great!♪}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|♪I love Bikini Bottom! It's where my Gary is!♪}}
Patchy: (gasps) Welcome to Encino! It's back!
{{L|Sandy|♪But Atlantis had that science stuff at which I was a whiz!♪}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|♪Soon I'll see the Krusty Krab. Where I'm happily employed!♪}}
Patchy: (Hugs it) SpongeBob was right! All I had to do was believe. (laughs)
{{L|Patrick|♪But Atlantis had the oldest bubble which I cruelly destroyed!♪}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|♪You can't beat Bikini Bottom! No place is so nice!♪}}
(Song)
{{L|Squidward|♪But Atlantis was a fabulous, artistic paradise!♪}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|♪Sorry, Squidward. But it's the end of our Atlantean vacation!♪}}
You got to believe. It was out of sight. You got to believe. I'm back in Encino. You got to believe. Everything's all right. The sky above, and the ground below. Bring me back into Encino. It was lost, some time ago, I'm just glad to be back home. You got to believe. I'm back in Encino. You got to believe. Everything's all right. You got to believe. I'm back in Eencino. You got to believe. Everything's all right. Baby: Ohh! Ohh! You got to believe. I'm back in Encino. You got to believe. Everything's all right. You got to believe. I'm back in Encino. You got to...
{{L|Squidward|♪And back to my depressing life of quiet desperation.♪}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|♪Goodbye, Atlantis. We're Bikini Bottom bound!♪}}
 
{{L|Squidward|♪Please turn this bus around!♪}}
Patchy: (Potty brawks, and then, pokes Patchy) Ow! Ow!
{{L|SpongeBob|♪We had our fun!♪}}
 
{{L|Patrick|♪We sure did!♪}}
Patchy: It was all a hallucination. Encino's still gone!
{{L|SpongeBob|♪But now we're done.♪}}
 
{{L|Sandy|♪And I'm bummed.♪}}
(Patchy cries)
{{L|SpongeBob|♪We're on our way!♪}}
 
{{L|Sandy|♪Can't we stay?♪}}
Patchy: Oooooo, a sandwich. Potty, you're a lifesaver.
{{L|SpongeBob|♪So now we say goodbye!♪}}
 
{{L|Mr. Krabs|I think I'm gonna cry!}}
Patchy: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
{{L|Patrick|Me too! ''[he and Mr. Krabs start sobbing hysterically]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|♪Goodbye, Atlantis. We're Bikini Bottom bound. There's no place like home!♪}}
Patchy: Oh, potty, you know I don't like mayo!
{{L|Mr. Krabs|There's no place like Atlantis!}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|♪I can't wait to get home.♪}}
Patchy: Here you want some? Go on. Take it.
{{L|Mr. Krabs|I don't wanna go back!}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|♪We're Bikini Bottom bound!♪}}
Patchy: You know, I don't like the mayonnaise, you know.
{{L|Sandy|Please, don't make us leave!}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|♪We're Bikini Bottom bound!♪}}
Patchy: You know, when it gets above 130, 135, it gets kind of rody, you know.
{{L|Squidward|Stop saying that!}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|♪I even love the sound!♪}}
Patchy: Well, pretty good story, huh, kids?
{{L|All|♪Goodbye, Atlantis! Boo hoo♪}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|♪Bikini Bottom is the greatest place to be! I can--♪}}
Patchy: I found Encino.
{{L|All|♪Goodbye, Atlantis!♪ ''[fades to black, then Patchy reappears]''}}
 
{{L|Patchy|Pretty good story, eh, kids? ''[steps on something, which happens to be Encino]'' I found Encino! ''[realized it's been shrunken]'' But it's all tiny! Somebody must have... ''[sees a big blue beam while he cries out in shock, and three aliens appear]''}}
Patchy: But, it's all tiny. Somebody must've...
{{L|Norbluckfive's mother|Sorry, sir. Our son Norbluckfive was messing with his shrink-a-tron again.}}
 
{{L|Patchy|No, no, no, no! I want Encino full size again! There's no place like home! There's no place like home!}}
Patchy: Ahhhhhhh! Ahhhh! Ahhhhhh!
{{L|Norbluckfive's mother|Okay, hand it over, Norbluckfive. ''[Norbluckfive pulls out a remote and gives it to his mother]'' We'll fix your town, Beardy!}}
 
{{L|Patchy|Beardy?! ''[Then, Norbluckfive's mother pushes the button, causing a huge tornado to be created with Patchy in it yelling. Cuts to Patchy's house]'' Well, Look's like everything's back to the right size, eh, Potty? ''[Wonders where Potty is]'' Potty?}}
Norbluckfive's father: Sorry, sir. But, our son norbluckfive was playing with his shrink-a-tron again.
{{L|Potty|Burrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! ''[Stomps on Patchy]''}}
 
{{L|Patchy|Owww! Well, kids, I'm a little busy right now, but, be sure to come back real soon for more of your old pal Patchy! Ow! And more SpongeBob SquarePants! Potty, will you get off of me?! ''[SpongeBob laughs]''}}
Patchy: No, no, no, no! I want encino full size again!
 
Patchy: There's no place like home. There's no place like home.
 
Norbluckfive's mother: Ok, bring it in, norglonfive.
 
Norbluckfive's mother: We'll fix your town, beardy.
 
Patchy: Beardy?
 
Patchy: Arrr! Arrr! Arrrr! Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh! Ahhhhhhhhh! Ahhhhhhhhh!
 
Patchy: Well, everything's back to the right size, eh, potty?
 
Patchy: Potty?
 
Potty: Burrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrg!
 
Patchy: Um, I'm a little busy right now, but, you, can stop by for your old pal Patchy.
 
Patchy: And some more SpongeBob SquarePants. Bye. Potty, let go of me.
 
(Large chunk of transcript missing here!)
 
(SpongeBob laughs)
[[Category:Episode transcripts]]

Latest revision as of 05:37, 1 August 2025

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