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{{EpisodeTranscript}}
*'''Narrator:''' Welcome to Bikini Bottom. Welcome where we found the finest specimens of undersea life. Aha. Well, here not. ''[Patrick is sleeping and when he wakes up there is a box in his mouth]''
{{L|''[The episode begins with a distant view of Bikini Bottom.]''}}
*'''Patrick:''' An award? I never got an award before! Eeeee! Look rock, I got an award. ''[arrow on top of rock breaks]'' Jellyfish, I got an award. ''[jellyfish zap him and he jumps up above the surface]'' Island, I got an awar... ''[chokes for air and floats back down] ''I gotta show SpongeBob.
{{L|French Narrator|Welcome to Bikini Bottom, where can be found some of the finest specimens of undersea life. ''[chuckles]'' Well, you know.}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' ''[building a house of cards looking like Gary]'' Hold still, Gary.
{{L|''[Patrick is sleeping and Incidental 154 walks by and puts a box in his open mouth as he is yawning and waking up. He grabs it and quickly opens it, and it turns out to be a shiny, gold trophy.]''}}
*'''Gary:''' Meow.
{{L|Patrick|An award? I never got an award before! Eeeee! Look, rock, I got an award! ''[the antenna on top of his rock breaks]'' Jellyfish, I got an award! ''[the jellyfish zap him. Cut to Bikini Atoll, where Patrick jumps up above the surface]'' Island, I got an awar-- ''[chokes for air and floats back down]'' I gotta show SpongeBob!}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Almost done. ''[Patrick opens door and cards fall on the floor]''
{{L|SpongeBob|''[building a house of cards looking like Gary]'' Hold still, Gary.}}
*'''Patrick:''' Hey, SpongeBob, guess what? I got an award.
{{L|Gary|Meow.}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' That's great, Patrick. What's it for?
{{L|SpongeBob|Almost done. ''[Patrick appears out of nowhere and the cards fall on the floor. Gary flies away]'' Ahh!}}
*'''Patrick:''' See for yourself.
{{L|Patrick|Hey, SpongeBob, guess what? I got an award! ''[SpongeBob falls down to the floor]''}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' (his body is facedown but his face come out and reads the award)"For Outstanding Achievement In Achievement: SpongeBob SquarePants?"
{{L|SpongeBob|''[muffled]'' That's great, Patrick. What's it for?}}
*'''Patrick:''' SpongeBob SquarePants? That's a funny way to spell my name.
{{L|Patrick|See for yourself.}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Patrick, I think the award is for me. You must have got it by mistake.
{{L|SpongeBob|''[his body is facedown, but his face come out and reads the award]'' "For Outstanding Achievement In Achievement: SpongeBob SquarePants"?}}
*'''Patrick:''' But, it's shiny.
{{L|Patrick|"SpongeBob SquarePants"? That's a funny way to spell my name.}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Yeah, but you know what else is shiny?
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, I think the award is for me. You must've got it by mistake.}}
*'''Patrick:''' Ice Cream!
{{L|Patrick|But, it's shiny. ''[SpongeBob takes the trophy]''}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Exactly!
{{L|SpongeBob|Yeah...but you know what else is shiny?}}
*'''Patrick:''' I can find it. Is it in here?
{{L|Patrick|Ice cream!}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' No, don't. That's my... ''[a bunch of awards pile out of SpongeBob's closet]'' ...award closet.
{{L|SpongeBob|Exactly!}}
*'''Patrick:''' I want an award. ''[starts to cry]''
{{L|Patrick|I can find it! Is it in here?}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' (Spongebob with ribbons in his eyes) Aww, Patrick, don't cry.
{{L|SpongeBob|No, don't! That's my... ''[Patrick opens the door, and a big load of trophies pile out of a closet]'' ...award closet.}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' You'll get an award one day.
{{L|Patrick|I want an award! ''[starts to cry]''}}
*'''Patrick:''' I'm never gonna get an award because I haven't done anything.
{{L|SpongeBob|''[has two 1st place ribbons in his eyes]'' Aw, Patrick, don't cry. ''[Patrick starts sobbing loudly and wildly going away from the awards]'' You'll get an award one day.}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' But you're Patrick...Star. You can do anything you want.
{{L|Patrick|I'm never gonna get an award 'cause I've never done anything!}}
*'''Patrick:''' That's east for you to say. You're SpongeBob.
{{L|SpongeBob|But you're Patrick... ''[jumps on Patrick and his eyes turn into stars]'' ''Star''! You can do anything you want!}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Patrick, if you wanna win an award, you have to do something.
{{L|Patrick|That's easy for you to say. You're Sponge''Bob''.}}
*'''Patrick:''' Hmmm...I wanna defeat the giant monkeyman and save the 9th dimension!
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, if you wanna win an award, you have to do something.}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Me too! But that sounds a little hard. Why don't we start smaller?
{{L|Patrick|Hmm... I wanna defeat the giant monkeyman and save the 9th dimension!}}
*'''Patrick:''' I wanna defeat the little monkeyman and save the 8th dimension!
{{L|SpongeBob|Me too! But that sounds a little hard. Why don't we start smaller?}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Smaller. ''[shrinks]''
{{L|Patrick|I wanna defeat the ''little'' monkeyman and save the ''8th'' dimension!}}
*'''Patrick:''' Doctor?
{{L|SpongeBob|Smaller. ''[shrinks]''}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Smaller. ''[shrinks more]''
{{L|Patrick|Doctor?}}
*'''Patrick:''' Fireman?
{{L|SpongeBob|Smaller. ''[shrinks more]''}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' ''[said in the tiny voice]'' The smallest you can think of. ''[shrinks even more]''
{{L|Patrick|Fireman?}}
*'''Patrick:''' A job at the Krusty Krab?
{{L|SpongeBob|''[in a tiny voice]'' The smallest you can think of! ''[shrinks even more]''}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' ''[normal voice]'' Yeah!! I do things at work all the time.
{{L|Patrick|A job at the Krusty Krab?}}
*'''Patrick:''' Then let's go.
{{L|SpongeBob|''[normal voice]'' Yeah! ''[reverts to normal size]'' I do things at work all the time!}}
*'''Patrick:''' Boy, it sure was nice of Mr Krabs to give me a job.
{{L|Patrick|Then let's go! ''[runs off, pulling off SpongeBob's arm]''}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' And at 50 dollars an hour, too. When I started working here, I had to pay Mr Krabs 100 dollars an hour. Hey, Squidward, guess who just got a job?
{{L|''[Bubble transition to the Krusty Krab.]''}}
*'''Squidward:''' Guess who just quit? ''[puts his hat on Patrick's head]''
{{L|Patrick|Boy, it sure was nice of Mr. Krabs to give me a job.}}
*'''Patrick:''' Do I get my award yet?
{{L|SpongeBob|And at 50 dollars an hour, too. When I started working here, I had to pay Mr. Krabs 100 dollars an hour. Hey, Squidward, guess who just got a job?}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' You have to work for it, remember?
{{L|Squidward|Guess who just quit? ''[puts his hat on Patrick's head and leaves]''}}
*'''Patrick:''' Tartar sauce. ''[SpongeBob flipping patties]''
{{L|Patrick|Do I get my award yet?}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Pick up order! ''[Patrick comes and eats the order]''
{{L|SpongeBob|You have to work for it, remember?}}
*'''Patrick:''' Do I get my award, now?
{{L|Patrick|Tartar sauce!}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' No, you have to take the tray to the customer.
{{L|''[Bubble transition to SpongeBob flipping patties.]''}}
*'''Patrick:''' Ok. ''[tray gets to table but with no food. Patrick burps]''
{{L|SpongeBob|''[places the order in the window]'' Pick-up order! ''[Patrick comes and gobbles up the order]''}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Almost. Try again and this time make sure the food gets to the table. ''[Patrick arrives with food on tray but then eats it as he sits down]''
{{L|Patrick|Do I get my award now?}}
*'''Patrick:''' Like that?
{{L|SpongeBob|No, you have to take the tray to the customer.}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Nope.
{{L|Patrick|Okay. ''[his tray gets to the table but with no food. He burps]''}}
*'''Patrick:''' ''[spits out food at the customer as he talks]'' Barnacles!
{{L|SpongeBob|Almost. Try again and this time make sure the food gets to the table. ''[Patrick arrives with the food on the tray but then gobbles it up as he sits down]''}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Let's try something different.
{{L|Patrick|Like that?}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' All you have to do is answer the phone.
{{L|SpongeBob|Nope.}}
*'''Patrick:''' Ok, SpongeBob. ''[phone rings]''
{{L|Patrick|''[spits out the food in Incidental 100's face and forehead palms as he frustratingly yells]'' Barnacles!}}
*'''Guy On Phone:''' Is this the Krusty Krab?
{{L|SpongeBob|Let's try something different.}}
*'''Patrick:''' No, this is Patrick. ''[hangs up and starts whistling]'' ''[phone rings again]''
{{L|''[Bubble transition to SpongeBob and Patrick at the cash register.]''}}
*'''Girl On Phone:''' Is this the Krusty Krab?
{{L|SpongeBob|All you have to do is answer the phone.}}
*'''Patrick:''' ''[annoyed]'' No! this is Patrick! ''[hangs up and continues to whistle]'' ''[phone rings, yet again]''
{{L|Patrick|Aye aye, Captain! ''[walks into the boat. The phone rings and he answers it]''}}
*'''Guy On Phone:''' Is this the Krusty Krab?
{{L|Man on Phone|Is this the Krusty Krab?}}
*'''Patrick:''' ''[irritated]'' NO!!! THIS IS PATRICK!!! ''[puts phone down]'' I'm not a Krusty Krab.
{{L|Patrick|No, this is Patrick. ''[hangs up and starts whistling. The phone rings again and he answers it]''}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Uhh, Patrick, that's the name of the restaurant.
{{L|Woman on Phone|Is this the Krusty Krab?}}
*'''Patrick:''' Huh? Oh, Fishpaste!
{{L|Patrick|''[annoyed]'' No, this is ''Patrick''. ''[hangs up and continues to whistle. The phone rings yet again and he answers it]''}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' It looks a little dusty around table 3. How about you sweep it out? ''[hands Patrick a broom]''
{{L|Another Man on Phone|Is this the Krusty Krab?}}
*'''Patrick:''' What's the point? I can't do anything right.
{{L|Patrick|''[yelling angrily]'' No! This is ''Patrick''! ''[puts the phone down and folds his arms]'' I'm not a Krusty Krab.}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' You'll do fine. ''[Patrick sweeps with the top instead of the bottom]''
{{L|SpongeBob|Uhh, Patrick, that's the name of the restaurant.}}
*'''Customer:''' Hey pal. You just blow in from Stupidtown?
{{L|Patrick|Huh? Oh... ''[cuts to a shot of the Krusty Krab]'' Fish paste!}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Keep trying, Patrick.
{{L|''[Bubble transition back to inside the Krusty Krab.]''}}
*'''Delivery Guy:''' I've got a load of awards for SpongeBob SquarePants. ''[Patrick gets mad and sweeps harder]''
{{L|SpongeBob|It looks a little dusty around Table 3. How about you sweep it out? ''[hands Patrick a broom]''}}
*'''Patrick:''' Why can't I do anything right? ''[bangs the bottom of the broom on the floor making dust rise all over the Krusty Krab's dining area, which makes the nearby customers start coughing]''
{{L|Patrick|What's the point? I can't do anything right.}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' ''[pushing Patrick]'' Kitchen!
{{L|SpongeBob|You'll do fine. ''[Patrick sweeps with the handle end of the broom instead of the head]''}}
*'''Patrick:''' I'm never going to get an award, now.
{{L|Nat Peterson|''[approaches Patrick]'' Hey, pal. You just blow in from Stupidtown? ''[continues drinking]''}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Don't give up, Patrick. This time I've got something I know you can do. We're gonna open a jar.''[gets a jar and opens the lid]'' Easy. Now you try. First get a jar. ''[Patrick gets out a pickle]'' Patrick, that's a pickle.
{{L|SpongeBob|Keep trying, Patrick.}}
*'''Patrick:''' Yes.
{{L|Incidental 119|I've got a load of awards for SpongeBob SquarePants.}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' You need a jar. ''[picks a spatula]'' No. ''[picks his pants]'' No. ''[picks up SpongeBob]'' No. Try...this! ''[gives Patrick a jar]'' Now take the lid off the jar. ''[puts the lid in his mouth]'' Just relax. Lift your hand. Great! We're almost there. Now put it on the lid. ''[puts hand on counter]'' No the lid. ''[Patrick tries for the lid over and over as SpongeBob keeps telling him "the lid". Few seconds later, Patrick is almost there]''Freeze!! ''[hand is on the side of the jar]'' Almost there. Now head for the lid. ''[hand goes lower]'' Cold. ''[hand goes higher]'' Warmer. ''[hand goes higher]'' Warmer. ''[hand goes higher]'' Warmer. You're hot. You're on fire!!
{{L|Patrick|''[furiously growls with steam whistle blowing]'' Why can't I do anything right?! ''[sweeps harder in frustration then jumps into the air and repeatedly bangs the head of the broom on the floor making dust rise all over the Krusty Krab's dining area, which makes the nearby customers cough]''}}
*'''Patrick:''' Ow, it burns!
{{L|SpongeBob|''[pushing Patrick]'' Kitchen...!}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Ok, ok. Wait, wait. Do exactly as I do. ''[takes it off again]'' Exactly as I do. ''[takes it off again]''Exactly. Exactly. Exactly.
{{L|Patrick|''[throws the broom to the floor]'' I'm never gonna get an award, now.}}
*'''Patrick:''' Exactly as you do. ''[takes lid off jar]'' Oh, no, I broke it!
{{L|SpongeBob|Don't give up, Patrick. This time I've got something I know you can do. We're gonna open a jar. ''[gets a jar and opens the lid]'' Easy. Now you try. First get a jar. ''[Patrick gets out a pickle]'' Patrick, that's a pickle.}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' No, no, Patrick, you did it!
{{L|Patrick|Yes.}}
*'''Patrick:''' I did? ''[both cheer as Patrick throws the jar into the floor]'' Touchdown!
{{L|SpongeBob|You need a jar. ''[Patrick picks up a spatula]'' No... ''[Patrick takes his pants off]'' No... ''[Patrick picks up SpongeBob]'' No. Try... this! ''[gives Patrick a jar]'' Now take the lid off the jar. ''[Patrick puts the lid in his mouth]'' Just relax. Lift your hand. ''[Patrick lifts his hand]'' Great! We're almost there. Now put it on the lid. ''[Patrick puts his hand on counter]'' No, the lid. ''[Patrick slides his hand to the corner of the counter]'' The lid. ''[Patrick tries for the lid over and over as SpongeBob keeps telling him "the lid," Patrick pants due to exhaustion; few seconds later, Patrick is almost there]'' Freeze! ''[Patrick's hand is on the side of the jar]'' Almost there. Now head for the lid. ''[his hand goes lower]'' Cold. ''[his hand goes higher]'' Warmer. ''[his hand goes higher]'' Warmer. ''[his hand goes higher]'' Warmer. You're hot. You're on fire!}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' That was great, Patrick! You really got the hang of it.
{{L|Patrick|''[exaggerating]'' Aagh, it burns!}}
*'''Patrick:''' Yeah. Remember when I had my up? And I put it on the lid?
{{L|SpongeBob|Ok, ok. Wait, wait. Do exactly as I do. ''[takes it off again]'' ''Exactly'' as I do. ''[takes it off again]'' Exactly. Exactly. Exactly.}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Oh, yeah.
{{L|Patrick|''Exactly'' as you do. ''[takes lid off jar, then starts to cry]'' Oh, no, I broke it!}}
*'''Patrick:''' Then I took the lid off and I thought I broke it.
{{L|SpongeBob|No, no, Patrick, you did it!}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' ''[laughs]'' Yeah.
{{L|Patrick|I did? ''[both cheer as Patrick slams the jar into the floor]'' Touchdown! I'm jarmaster!}}
*'''Patrick:''' But I didn't. I opened the jar with my hand. And it was all because you showed me how to do it. I'm never gonna forget this.
{{L|''[The scene changes to the two leaving the Krusty Krab.]''}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Patrick, you do exactly what I do and you'll have an award in no time. ''[night becomes day in SpongeBob's House then clam crows everyone up]'' I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. ''[notices Patrick dressed up like him]''
{{L|SpongeBob|That was great, Patrick! You really got the hang of it.}}
*'''Patrick:''' Good morning, SpongeBob.
{{L|Patrick|Yeah. Remember when I had my hand up? And I put it on the lid?}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Wow. It's amazing how a simple change of clothes can make a guy look...just...like...me.
{{L|SpongeBob|Oh, yeah.}}
*'''Patrick:''' Yup. If I'm gonna be an award winner, I've gotta dress like one.
{{L|Patrick|And then I took the lid off and I thought I broke it?}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' That's creepy...but flattering! I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready... ''[Patrick copies SpongeBob then SpongeBob stops]''
{{L|SpongeBob|''[laughs]'' Yeah.}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Well, back to the ol' grind.
{{L|Patrick|But I didn't. I opened the jar with my hand. And it was all because you showed me how to do it. I'm never gonna forget this.}}
*'''Patrick:''' Well, back to the ol' grind.
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, you do exactly what I do, and you'll have an award in no time. ''[bubble transition. Night becomes day in SpongeBob's house. A clam crows like a rooster]'' I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. ''[notices Patrick dressed up like him]''}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Forget my hat.
{{L|Patrick|Good morning, SpongeBob!}}
*'''Patrick:''' Uhh, me, too.
*'''SpongeBob:''' ''[SpongeBob mops the floor then puts the mop up. Patrick mops the floor but makes it slippery. SpongeBob comes out with a handful of plates and slips and breaks them all. Patrick follows in SpongeBob's footsteps]''
*'''SpongeBob & Patrick:''' Whew! ''[drops his spatula]''
*'''SpongeBob:''' ''[laughs]'' Dropped my spatula. ''[bends down to pick it up]''
*'''Patrick:''' Uhh, me, too. ''[drops spatula then picks it up. Spongebob picks up his hat Patrick does it too. both put their hats back on. Both putting their hands on the grill. Patrick's hand burns after a few seconds]''OWWWWWWW!!!
*'''SpongeBob:''' Aha! ''[shows the fake hand]'' You're copying me!
*'''Patrick:''' Yes.
*'''SpongeBob:''' Why are you doing that?
*'''Patrick:''' So I can get an award like you.
*'''SpongeBob:''' Well, it's annoying, so stop it!
*'''Patrick:''' Stop it. ''[both imitate the others facial expressions]''
*'''SpongeBob:''' Say, you're good.
*'''Patrick:''' Thanks.
*'''SpongeBob & Patrick:''' Ha! Darn. Mary had a little lamb whose fleece was white as...pickled fish lips!! ''[both cover their mouth]'' Sea weavle. Gorgy smorgy.
*'''SpongeBob:''' ''[voice over]'' At least I'm safe inside my mind.
*'''Patrick:''' ''[voice over]'' At least I'm safe inside my mind.
*'''SpongeBob & Patrick:''' STOP!
*'''SpongeBob:''' Stop copying me!
*'''Patrick:''' There's no award for that.
*'''Squidward:''' ''[leaning against a pole and reading]'' Well, I guess it's safe to go in, now. ''[puts hat back on and walks in]''
*'''SpongeBob:''' Patrick, how long are you going to keep this up?
*'''Patrick:''' Until I have as many awards as you.
*'''SpongeBob:''' We'll see about that!
*'''Patrick:''' No, we won't.
*'''SpongeBob:''' ''[takes out a jump-rope]'' I'm the jump-rope champion of Bikini Bottom.
*'''Patrick:''' Me, too. ''[takes out a jump-rope]''
*'''SpongeBob:''' Oh, yeah? I call this one: The Slice N' Dice. ''[crosses arms and jump-ropes while Patrick tries to imitate but ties himself up with his rope]'' Ha! Not a scratch on me. ''[body breaks down into pieces]''
*'''Patrick:''' Oh, no you don't! ''[squeezes the rope on himself breaking his body down into smaller pieces. Then both hit a hammer on their heads]''
*'''SpongeBob:''' Not much fun being me, now, huh Patrick?
*'''Patrick:''' Are you kidding? I used to do this way before I started copying you. ''[Patrick hits himself too hard and stops and gets a headache. SpongeBob runs into Patrick's rock painted as a SpongeBob's house]''
*'''Patrick:''' My turn! ''[runs into the pineapple rock]''
*'''SpongeBob:''' ''[runs into his pineapple]'' I wish I had the old Patrick back, but he just want to be like me.''[comes out of house dressed like Patrick]'' Hi, I'm Patrick Star. I'm the laziest, pinkest starfish in Bikini Bottom and I wish I were me and not SpongeBob.
*'''Patrick:''' What's so great about being a Big Pink Loser? ''[SpongeBob's nose pokes out]'' Exactly. I was never closer to an award then the minute I started copying you.
*'''SpongeBob:''' But, Patrick...
*'''Patrick:''' Patrick's not here!
*'''Delivery Guy:''' Trophy delivery! ''[shoves a trophy box in SpongeBob's mouth]''
*'''SpongeBob:''' Another trophy?
*'''Patrick:''' Oh, great! What's it for this time?
*'''SpongeBob:''' 'For Doing Absolutely Nothing Longer Than Anyone Else'.
*Patrick! This trophy's for you!
*'''Patrick:''' Yay! ''[puts trophy on head]'' Eee!
*'''SpongeBob:''' So, what are you going to do, now?
*'''Patrick:''' I'm gonna go protect my title. ''[jumps in his rock and falls asleep]''
*'''Narrator:''' You thought I was kidding, did you? No, here in Bikini Bottom, success can even be found under a rock.
Day Two
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, you do exactly what I do and you'll have an award in no time. ''[night becomes day in SpongeBob's House then clam crows everyone up]'' I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. ''[notices Patrick dressed up like him]''}}
{{L|Patrick|Good morning, SpongeBob.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Wow. It's amazing how a simple change of clothes can make a guy look...just...like...me.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Wow. It's amazing how a simple change of clothes can make a guy look...just...like...me.}}
{{L|Patrick|Yup. If I'm gonna be an award winner, I've gotta dress like one.}}
{{L|Patrick|Yup, if I'm gonna be an award winner, I've gotta dress like one!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|That's creepy...but flattering! I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready... ''[Patrick copies SpongeBob then SpongeBob stops]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|That's creepy...but flattering! I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready... ''[Patrick copies SpongeBob, who then stops]'' Huh?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Well, back to the ol' grind.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Well, back to the old grind.}}
{{L|Patrick|Well, back to the ol' grind.}}
{{L|Patrick|Well, back to the old grind.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Forget my hat.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[puts on his work hat]'' Forgot my hat.}}
{{L|Patrick|Uhh, me, too.}}
{{L|Patrick|''[also puts on his work hat]'' Uh, me, too. ''[SpongeBob mops the floor then puts the mop up; Patrick mops the floor, but he makes the floor wet; SpongeBob comes out with a handful of plates and slips and breaks them all; Patrick follows in SpongeBob's footsteps; SpongeBob glares at him]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[SpongeBob mops the floor then puts the mop up. Patrick mops the floor but makes it slippery. SpongeBob comes out with a handful of plates and slips and breaks them all. Patrick follows in SpongeBob's footsteps]''}}
{{L|''[Bubble transition to SpongeBob and Patrick at the grill frying patties. They both whistle to the tune of "Row, Row, Row Your Boat", then stop, and they both wipe their foreheads.]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob & Patrick|Whew! ''[drops his spatula]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob and Patrick|Whew! ''[SpongeBob drops his spatula]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[laughs]'' Dropped my spatula. ''[bends down to pick it up]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[laughs]'' Dropped my spatula. ''[bends down to pick it up]''}}
{{L|Patrick|Uhh, me, too. ''[drops spatula then picks it up. Spongebob picks up his hat Patrick does it too. both put their hats back on. Both putting their hands on the grill. Patrick's hand burns after a few seconds]'' OWWWWWWW!!!}}
{{L|Patrick|Uhh, me, too. ''[drops his spatula and bends down to pick it up; SpongeBob takes off his hat, then Patrick takes off his, they both put their hats back on, then they both put their hands on the grill; Patrick's hand burns after a few seconds]'' Owwww!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Aha! ''[shows the fake hand]'' You're copying me!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Aha! ''[shows the fake hand]'' You're copying me!}}
{{L|Patrick|Yes.}}
{{L|Patrick|Yes.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Why are you doing that?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Why are you doing that?}}
{{L|Patrick|So I can get an award like you.}}
{{L|Patrick|So I can win an award like you.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Well, it's annoying, so stop it!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Well, it's annoying, so stop it!}}
{{L|Patrick|Stop it. ''[both imitate the others facial expressions]''}}
{{L|Patrick|Stop it. ''[both imitate the others facial expressions]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Say, you're good.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Say, you're good.}}
{{L|Patrick|Thanks.}}
{{L|Patrick|Thanks.}}
{{L|SpongeBob & Patrick|Ha! Darn. Mary had a little lamb whose fleece was white as...pickled fish lips!! ''[both cover their mouth]'' Sea weavle. Gorgy smorgy.}}
{{L|SpongeBob and Patrick|Ha! Darn. ''[both look at each other with suspicion, while rubbing their chins. They later watch each other as they dance to ''Mary Had a Little Lamb'']'' Mary had a little lamb whose fleece was white as... pickle fish lips! ''[both cover their mouths]'' Seaweavel. ''[both cover their mouths again]''  Yorgyshmorgies. ''[both cover their mouths yet again]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[voice over]'' At least I'm safe inside my mind.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[in his head]'' At least I'm safe inside my mind. ''[realizes that he is not safe in his mind]''}}
{{L|Patrick|''[voice over]'' At least I'm safe inside my mind.}}
{{L|Patrick|''[in his head]'' At least I'm safe inside my mind.}}
{{L|SpongeBob & Patrick|Ahh!}}
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick then scream in panic and run out of the Krusty Krab.]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Stop copying me!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Stop copying me!}}
{{L|Patrick|There's no award for that.}}
{{L|Patrick|There's no award for that!}}
{{L|Squidward|''[leaning against a pole and reading]'' Well, I guess it's safe to go in, now. ''[puts hat back on and walks in]''}}
{{L|Squidward|''[leaning against the Krusty Krab sign pole, reading a newspaper, a Krusty Krab hat falls near him]'' Well, I guess it's safe to go in now. ''[puts his hat back on and walks back in]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, how long are you going to keep this up?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[he and Patrick are still running]'' Patrick, how long are you gonna keep this up?}}
{{L|Patrick|Until I have as many awards as you.}}
{{L|Patrick|Until I have as many awards as you.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|We'll see about that!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|We'll see about that!}}
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{{L|SpongeBob|''[takes out a jump-rope]'' I'm the jump-rope champion of Bikini Bottom.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[takes out a jump-rope]'' I'm the jump-rope champion of Bikini Bottom.}}
{{L|Patrick|Me, too. ''[takes out a jump-rope]''}}
{{L|Patrick|Me, too. ''[takes out a jump-rope]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Oh, yeah? I call this one: The Slice N' Dice. ''[crosses arms and jump-ropes while Patrick tries to imitate but ties himself up with his rope]'' Ha! Not a scratch on me. ''[body breaks down into pieces]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Oh, yeah? I call this one: The Slice N' Dice. ''[crosses his arms and jump-ropes while Patrick tries to imitate but ties himself up with his rope]'' Ha! Not a scratch on me. ''[his body breaks down into pieces, which later hop away]''}}
{{L|Patrick|Oh, no you don't! ''[squeezes the rope on himself breaking his body down into smaller pieces. Then both hit a hammer on their heads]''}}
{{L|Patrick|Oh, no, you don't! ''[squeezes the rope on himself breaking his body down into smaller pieces, then he and SpongeBob repeatedly hit their heads with a hammer]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Not much fun being me, now, huh Patrick?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Not much fun being me, now, huh, Patrick?}}
{{L|Patrick|Are you kidding? I used to do this way before I started copying you. ''[Patrick hits himself too hard and stops and gets a headache. SpongeBob runs into Patrick's rock painted as a SpongeBob's house]''}}
{{L|Patrick|Are you kidding? I used to do this ''way'' before I started copying you. ''[SpongeBob stops hammering his head but Patrick does not notice; Patrick hits himself faster and too hard, he stops and gets dizzy...]'' Wheeeee-eeeeeyeeehhh-eeeeh. ''[...as trophies appear and spin around his head, tweeting like birds. He falls on the ground; SpongeBob laughs and runs into Patrick's rock painted as SpongeBob's house; SpongeBob gets angry and steam comes out of his head]''}}
{{L|Patrick|My turn! ''[runs into the pineapple rock]''}}
{{L|Patrick|My turn! ''[runs into the pineapple rock]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[runs into his pineapple]'' I wish I had the old Patrick back, but he just want to be like me. ''[comes out of house dressed like Patrick]'' Hi, I'm Patrick Star. I'm the laziest, pinkest starfish in Bikini Bottom and I wish I were me and not SpongeBob.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[runs into his house]'' I wish I had the old Patrick back, but he just wants to be like me. ''[pushes his nose into his face and comes out of his house dressed in Patrick's normal outfit. He imitates Patrick.]'' Hi, I'm Patrick Star. I'm the laziest, pinkest starfish in Bikini Bottom and I wish I were me and not SpongeBob.}}
{{L|Patrick|What's so great about being a Big Pink Loser? ''[SpongeBob's nose pokes out]'' Exactly. I was never closer to an award then the minute I started copying you.}}
{{L|Patrick|What's so great about being a big pink loser? ''[SpongeBob's nose pops back out]'' Exactly. I was never closer to an award than the minute I started copying you.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|But, Patrick...}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[normal voice]'' But, Patrick...}}
{{L|Patrick|Patrick's not here!}}
{{L|Patrick|Patrick's not here!}}
{{L|Delivery Guy|Trophy delivery! ''[shoves a trophy box in SpongeBob's mouth]''}}
{{L|Incidental 41|''[stops in front of SpongeBob and Patrick in truck]'' Trophy delivery! ''[drives off and SpongeBob has a package in his mouth]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Another trophy?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Another trophy?}}
{{L|Patrick|Oh, great! What's it for this time?}}
{{L|Patrick|''[sarcastically]'' Oh, great! ''[SpongeBob opens the package]'' What's it for ''this'' time?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|'For Doing Absolutely Nothing Longer Than Anyone Else'.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|"For Doing Absolutely Nothing Longer Than Anyone Else: Patrick"! This trophy's for you!}}
{{L|Patrick! This trophy's for you!}}
{{L|Patrick|Yay! ''[puts his trophy on his head like a hat]'' Eeee! ''[both rip off their present outfits to reveal their own normal outfits]''}}
{{L|Patrick|Yay! ''[puts trophy on head]'' Eee!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|So, what are you gonna do now?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|So, what are you going to do, now?}}
{{L|Patrick|I'm gonna go protect my title! ''[jumps on his rock and falls asleep, the rock closes]''}}
{{L|Patrick|I'm gonna go protect my title. ''[jumps in his rock and falls asleep]''}}
{{L|French Narrator|So you thought I was kidding, huh? ''[cut back to a distant view of Bikini Bottom]'' No, in Bikini Bottom, excellence can be found, even under a rock. ''[the episode ends]''}}
{{L|Narrator|You thought I was kidding, did you? No, here in Bikini Bottom, success can even be found under a rock.}}
[[Category:Episode transcripts]]
[[Category:2000 transcripts]]

Latest revision as of 22:37, 1 May 2025

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