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{{Transcript-cleanup}}
{{EpisodeTranscript}}
{{EpisodeTranscript}}{{L|''[Mr. Krabs walks outside of his house, opens his mailbox, and then sticks his claw into it.]''}}
{{L|''[The episode opens with Mr. Krabs walking outside of his house, opening his mailbox, and then sticking his claw into it.]''}}
{{L|Mr. Krabs|''[With his eyes closed]'' Please be money, please be money. ''[Pulls out postcard from mailbox.]'' Oh! That's not money. It's from SpongeBob. ''[Puts on his glasses, and reads the postcard]'' "Dear Mr... Krabs, please come to my house tonight. I am having a free money party." Free money party!? This sounds too good to be true!}}
{{L|Mr. Krabs|''[with his eyes closed]'' Please be money, please be money. ''[pulls out postcard from mailbox]'' Oh! That's not money. It's from SpongeBob. ''[puts on his glasses, and reads the postcard]'' "Dear Mr... Krabs, please come to my house tonight. I am having a free money party." Free money party!? This sounds too good to be true!}}
{{L|''[Cuts to scene to show Squidward by his mailbox]''}}
{{L|''[Bubble transition to Squidward reading a postcard by his mailbox.]''}}
{{L|Squidward|''[Reads postcard]'' "Dear Squidward, come to my house tonight, I am having a... ''[surprised]'' ...latte sipping contest?" This sound too good to be true!}}
{{L|Squidward|"Dear Squidward, come to my house tonight, I am having a... ''[surprised]'' ...latte sipping contest?" This sounds too good to be true!}}
{{L|''[Cuts to inside of Sandy's treedome]''}}
{{L|''[Bubble transition to Sandy reading a postcard.]''}}
{{L|Sandy|''[Reading postcard]'' "Please come by my house tonight. I'm having a science fair!" Oh, SpongeBob, this sounds too good to be true!" ''[Her science experiment fizzes]''}}
{{L|Sandy|"Please come by my house tonight. I'm having a science fair!" Oh, SpongeBob, this sounds plumb too good to be true! ''[her science experiment fizzes]''}}
{{L|''[Cuts to Larry lifting weights]''}}
{{L|''[Bubble transition to Larry reading a postcard while lifting.]''}}
{{L|Larry|''[Reading postcard]'' "I am having a weight lifting competition!?" This sounds too good to be true!}}
{{L|Larry|"I am having a weight lifting competition!?" This sounds too good to be true!}}
{{L|''[Cuts to Mrs. Puff at boating school]''}}
{{L|''[Bubble transition to Mrs. Puff at boating school reading a postcard.]''}}
{{L|Mrs. Puff|''[Gasps as she reads postcard]'' "A quiet evening studying the rules of the road!?" ''[Laughs]'' Oh! Ahem... That sounds too good to be true.}}
{{L|Mrs. Puff|''[gasps]'' "A quiet evening studying the rules of the road!?" ''[laughs]'' Oh! Ahem... That sounds too good to be true.}}
{{L|''[Cuts to the inside of the Chum Bucket]''}}
{{L|''[Bubble transition to the Chum Bucket.]''}}
{{L|Plankton|''[Reading postcard]'' "A meeting of the minds to discuss the ultimate downfall of the Krusty Krab!?" This sounds too good to be true!}}
{{L|Plankton|''[reading postcard]'' "A meeting of the minds to discuss the ultimate downfall of the Krusty Krab!?" This sounds too good to be true!}}
{{L|''[Cuts to Mr. Krabs knocking on SpongeBob's door]''}}
{{L|''[Bubble transition to Mr. Krabs knocking on SpongeBob's door.]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[opens the door]'' Welcome, friends! Please come in!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[opens the door]'' Welcome, friends! Please come in!}}
{{L|''[Everyone walks inside]''}}
{{L|''[Everyone walks inside]''}}
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{{L|Plankton|And diabolical conspiracies?}}
{{L|Plankton|And diabolical conspiracies?}}
{{L|Sandy|And let's not forget the science fair!}}
{{L|Sandy|And let's not forget the science fair!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|The real reason I called you here was to watch this slideshow of photos from my family vacation!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|The ''real'' reason I called you here was to watch this slideshow of photos from my family vacation!}}
{{L|Squidward, Sandy, Mr. Krabs, Plankton, Mrs. Puff, Larry, and Pearl|I knew it was too good to be true!}}
{{L|Squidward, Sandy, Mr. Krabs, Plankton, Mrs. Puff, Larry, and Pearl|''[angrily]'' I knew it was too good to be true!}}
{{L|''[Patrick then bursts through the crowd]''}}
{{L|''[Patrick, wearing a popcorn sipping hat, then bursts through the crowd.]''}}
{{L|Patrick|Ahaha! Ahaha! Sorry I'm late, SpongeBob! I had to find my movie watching hat!}}
{{L|Patrick|Ahaha! Ahaha! Sorry I'm late, SpongeBob! I had to find my movie watching hat!}}
{{L|Plankton|That does it... I'm gone. ''[Plankton starts to leave, but the others exit, and Larry squishes him, followed by Pearl, Mrs. Puff, and Sandy, all stepping on him]'' Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!}}
{{L|Plankton|That does it... I'm gone. ''[Plankton starts to leave, but the others exit, and Larry squishes him, followed by Pearl, Mrs. Puff, and Sandy, all stepping on him]'' Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!}}
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{{L|Patrick|''[Drooling]'' And forts...}}
{{L|Patrick|''[Drooling]'' And forts...}}
{{L|SpongeBob|And ropes to swing on...}}
{{L|SpongeBob|And ropes to swing on...}}
{{L|Patrick|''[Still drooling]'' And forts.}}
{{L|Patrick|''[Still drooling]'' And forts.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|And a water park! ''[Camera zooms out, pans to Patrick drooling on map.]'' Oh wait, that's just where you drooled on it. ''[Closes brochure]'' I can't wait to get there! How about you?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|And a water park! ''[Camera zooms out, pans to Patrick drooling on map.]'' Oh wait, that's just where you drooled on it. ''[Closes brochure]'' I can't wait to get there! How about you?}}
{{L|Patrick|No, I can't.}}
{{L|Patrick|No, I can't.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[With his eyes closed]'' Yeah...}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[With his eyes closed]'' Yeah...}}
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{{L|Harold|''[Singing]'' "And she threw it all away..."}}
{{L|Harold|''[Singing]'' "And she threw it all away..."}}
{{L|Patrick|''[Flies into windshield]'' Okay find me!}}
{{L|Patrick|''[Flies into windshield]'' Okay find me!}}
{{L|Harold| Egad!}}
{{L|Harold|Egad!}}
 
{{L|''[Car spins out of control, crashing into a sign for The Great Barrier Reef. The car crashes in the Outskirts Outlet Mega Mall, bouncing through. The car goes down the escalator, while a tan female fish looks over at the car, and doesn't seem to care. The car then crashes out of the mall, flying through the air, and landing on a race track.]''}}
*''[Car spins out of control, crashing into a sign for The Great Barrier Reef. The car crashes in the Outskirts Outlet Mega Mall, bouncing through. The car goes down the escalator, while a tan female fish looks over at the car, and doesn't seem to care. The car then crashes out of the mall, flying through the air, and landing on a race track. The car bounces off of a siren, and then circles the track. The car crosses the finish line, and wins the race. The crowd cheers, and the car crashes through the trophies, exiting the race. The car leaves the ocean, and flies into the air, eventually flying through space. The car hits the cow that jumped over the moon, and falls back down into the ocean. The car crashes between a multitude of rocks, before landing back on the road, and driving away with Patrick now inside.]''
{{L|Announcer|There's the green flag and the race is underway. ''[The car bounces off of a siren, and then circles the track. The car crosses the finish line, and wins the race.]'' And we have a new winner!}}
 
{{L|''[The crowd cheers, and the car crashes through the trophies, exiting the race. The car leaves the ocean, and flies into the air, eventually flying through space. The car hits the cow that jumped over the moon, and falls back down into the ocean. The car crashes between a multitude of rocks, before landing back on the road, and driving away with Patrick now inside.]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Maybe we should just sing the road song.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Maybe we should just sing the road song.}}
{{L|Patrick| Road. Road. Road. Road.}}
{{L|Patrick|♪Road! Road! Road! Road!♪ ''[Continues for rest of song]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| ''(Continues for rest of song)'' When I'm on the road, I see stuff going by. When I'm on the road.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|♪When I'm on the road, I see stuff going by. When I'm on the road,♪}}
{{L|Patrick| I got a bug in my eye.}}
{{L|Patrick|♪I got a bug in my eye!♪}}
{{L|SpongeBob| When I'm on the road.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|♪When I'm on the road,♪}}
{{L|Margaret| Looks like clear skies ahead.}}
{{L|Margaret|♪Looks like clear skies ahead.}}
{{L|SpongeBob| When I'm on the road.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|♪When I'm on the road,♪}}
{{L|Harold| Please stop touching my head.}}
{{L|Harold|♪Please stop touching my head.}}
 
{{L|All|♪Let's all sing the road song!♪}}
{{L|All| Let's all sing the road song.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|♪I wanna sing it all day long!♪}}
{{L|SpongeBob| I want to sing it all day long.}}
{{L|All|♪Let's all sing the road song! Let's all sing along!}}
{{L|All| Let's all sing the road song. Let's all sing along!}}
{{L|''[Song ends abruptly when fire starts on top of car. Cuts to show car from the outside.]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Um... anybody know any other good road tunes?}}
*''(Song ends abruptly when fire starts on top of car. Cuts to show car from the outside.)''  
{{L|''[Cut to the gang pushing the car, sans Patrick who thinks he is pushing the car, but is not pushing anything.]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|How much farther to the nearest service station?}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Um... anybody know any other good road tunes?}}
{{L|Harold|Probably pretty far son.}}
 
{{L|''[Cuts to show road sign that shows that the nearest service station is "Probably pretty far."]''}}
*''(Cut to the gang pushing the car, sans Patrick who thinks he is pushing the car, but is not pushing anything.)''
{{L|SpongeBob|Oh, you're right!}}
 
{{L|''[Gang continues to push car, cut to them at a service station.]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| How much farther to the nearest service station?}}
{{L|Harold|So, uh, how's it lookin'?}}
{{L|Harold| Probably pretty far son.}}
{{L|Service Station Worker|''[Pointing to objects in car]'' Well, it's got a cracked timing case cover, you've broken a couple teeth off the timing gear, your radiator is damaged at the core, you got a cracked water pump, and a fractured injector line.}}
 
{{L|Margaret|And what does all that mean?}}
*''(Cuts to show road sign that shows that the nearest service station is "Proabably pretty far.")''
{{L|Service Station Worker|Well, little missy, in technical terms... if she don't wanna run, she don't wanna run!}}
 
{{L|''[Cuts to Margaret and Harold staring blankly.]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Oh, you're right!}}
{{L|Harold|Uh-huh. So what are we looking at time wise?}}
 
{{L|Service Station Worker|Well, now, that depends... how much time ya got? ''[Service Station Worker starts laughing]''}}
*''(Gang continues to push car, cut to them at a service station.)''
{{L|Patrick|''[Laughing]'' How much time ya- ''[All stare at Patrick]'' Not funny.}}
 
{{L|''[SpongeBob takes a picture.]''}}
{{L|Harold| So, uh, how's it lookin'?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Hey at least they have a cozy-looking waiting room! ''[Points to outhouse.]'' Come on!}}
{{L|Service Station Worker| ''(Pointing to objects in car)'' Well, it's got a cracked timing case cover, you've broken a couple keys off the timing gear, your radiator is damaged at the core, you got a cracked water pump, and a fractured injector line.}}
{{L|''[Cut to the gang in the outhouse. Harold is reading the paper and Margaret is knitting. SpongeBob and Patrick are waiting silently.]''}}
{{L|Margaret| And what does all that mean?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Man, am I bored.}}
{{L|Service Station Worker| Well little missy, in technical terms... if she don't wanna run, she don't wanna run!}}
{{L|Patrick|I am beyond bored. I am... be...yond.}}
 
{{L|Margaret|''[Looking out window]'' Oh boys! Is that a playground I see?}}
*''(Cuts to Margaret and Harold staring blankly.)''
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick stare blankly for a few moments before running to the playground, hollering "Playground!" They slow down upon noticing all the mud around the playground]''}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Not the most colorful playground I've seen.}}
{{L|Harold| Uh-huh. So what are we looking at time wise?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Mm-mmm. This looks more like a gray-ground.}}
{{L|Service Station Worker| Well now that depends... how much time ya got? ''(Service Station Worker starts laughing)''}}
{{L|''Cuts to swings, slide, and see-saw. SpongeBob takes a picture.''}}
{{L|Patrick| ''(Laughing)'' How much time ya- ''(All stare at Patrick)'' Not funny.}}
{{L|Margaret|Well I'll just let you two amuse yourselves and come back for you when the boat's fixed.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|''[Turns to Margaret]'' Actually this place seems a little bit-}}
*''(SpongeBob takes a picture.)''
{{L|Margaret|Have fun!}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Well, this is a nasty turn of events.}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Hey at least they have a cozy-looking waiting room! ''(Points to outhouse.)'' Come on!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|You're preaching to the choir, Patrick.}}
 
{{L|Patrick|''[Crosses arms]'' I knew it was gonna happen, too.}}
*''(Cut to the gang in the outhouse. Harold is reading the paper and Margaret is knitting. SpongeBob and Patrick are waiting silently.)''
{{L|SpongeBob|You did? How?}}
 
{{L|Patrick|''[Turns around to reveal Cheese Fizz spread across his shorts, reaches into pocket]'' Because it happens every time I keep my cheese fizz in my back pocket! ''[Sprays remaining cheese fizz into mouth before running out.]'' Darn! It's almost empty!}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Man, am I bored.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[Walking towards see-saw]'' Well, I guess we'll have to make the best of it. ''[Jumps onto see-saw while laughing.]'' This is fun! Hey Patrick, you- ''[SpongeBob's speech becomes incoherent as he sinks into the mud.]''}}
{{L|Patrick| I am beyond bored. I am... be...yord.}}
{{L|Patrick|''[Spraying Cheese Fizz into mouth]'' Huh? ''[Patrick walks towards the mud that SpongeBob had sunk into.]'' SpongeBob, were you talking to me? ''[SpongeBob reaches his arms out of the mud]'' I could have sworn SpongeBob was calling me from this direction. SpongeBob, where are you?!}}
{{L|Margaret| ''(Looking out window)'' Oh boys! Is that a playground I see?}}
{{L|''[SpongeBob pulls himself out from the mud by grabbing onto Patrick. Patrick is now sitting on top of SpongeBob]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Hey, Patrick.}}
*''(SpongeBob and Patrick stare blankly for a few moments before running to the playground, hollering "Playground!" They slow down upon noticing all the mud around the playground)''
{{L|Patrick|Huh? SpongeBob? Oh come on, where are you hiding? This isn't funny! ''[Looking around]'' Huh. ''[Puts hands on hips]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|''[Pokes Patrick]'' Patrick, I'm right here.}}
{{L|Patrick| Not the most colorful playground I've seen.}}
{{L|Patrick|''[Looks at SpongeBob]'' Oh, hey SpongeBob! How'd ya get there?}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Mm-mmm. This looks more like a grey-ground.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Well, I was on this see-saw-}}
 
{{L|Patrick|''[Yelling]'' Slide! ''[Bounces off of SpongeBob and onto slide. Patrick laughs and attempts to go down slide, but gets stuck and has to force himself down. The slide gets stuck to his bottom. Patrick tries to pull the slide off, but fails. The slide hits Patrick, and he goes flying.]''}}
*''(Cuts to swings, slide, and see-saw. SpongeBob takes a picture.)''
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, do you need help?}}
 
{{L|Patrick|''[Walks up to SpongeBob with side still stuck]'' Huh? With the slide stuck to my bottom? Nah, I want it there. ''[Patrick stands motionless for a second.]'' I hate you slide! ''[Pull slide off, flattening SpongeBob. SpongeBob sits motionless on the sand.]'' Oh, sorry SpongeBob. ''[Patrick pulls the slide off and throws it behind him]''}}
{{L|Margaret| Well I'll just let you two amuse yourselves and come back for you when the boat's fixed.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[Wobbles back up]'' Hey look, a swingset! ''[Flops over to the swings, pulling himself back up]'' Can't go wrong with this old-time playground favorite. ''[SpongeBob swings on swing set.]'' Weee. Hey, this is almost like being at The Great Barrier Reef, huh? Try it, Patrick.}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Okay. ''[Patrick sits motionless on swing.]'' It's not working.}}
{{L|SpongeBob| ''(Turns to Margaret)'' Actually this place seems a little bit-}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[Swinging]'' Go back and forth like this. ''[Patrick starts swinging]'' There you go! Now you're getting into the... swing of things! ''[Laughing]''}}
 
{{L|Patrick|''[Starts laughing]'' Hey, watch me go!}}
{{L|Margaret| Have fun!}}
{{L|''[Patrick breaks the swing set and flies off, screaming]''}}
{{L|Patrick| Well this is a nasty turn of events.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick?}}
{{L|SpongeBob| You're preaching to the choir, Patrick.}}
{{L|Patrick|''[Rolls into fence, breaking it and starts falling down a slide]''}}
{{L|Patrick| ''(Crosses arms)'' I knew it was gonna happen, too.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick! I'm coming!}}
{{L|SpongeBob| You did? How?}}
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick slide down the water slide, screaming, while going down multiple sharp turns. SpongeBob and Patrick end up in a puddle]''}}
{{L|Patrick| ''(Turns around to reveal Cheese Fizz spread across his shorts, reaches into pocket)'' Because it happens every time I keep my cheese fizz in my back pocket! ''(Sprays remaining cheese fizz into mouth before running out.)'' Darn! It's almost empty!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick?}}
{{L|SpongeBob| ''(Walking towards see-saw)'' Well, I guess we'll have to make the best of it. ''(Jumps onto see-saw while laughing.)'' This is fun! Hey Patrick, you- ''(SpongeBob's speech becomes incoherent as he sinks into the mud.)''}}
{{L|Patrick|''[Muffled]'' SpongeBob?}}
{{L|Patrick| ''(Spraying Cheese Fizz into mouth)'' Huh? ''(Patrick walks towards the mud that SpongeBob had sunk into.)'' SpongeBob were you talking to me? ''(SpongeBob reaches his arms out of the mud)'' I could have sworn SpongeBob was calling me from this direction. SpongeBob where are you?!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick! Are you okay?}}
 
{{L|Patrick|No, I'm not okay.}}
*''(SpongeBob pulls himself out from the mud by grabbing onto Patrick. Patrick is now sitting on top of SpongeBob)''
{{L|SpongeBob|You're not?}}
 
{{L|Patrick|No, I'm great! That was awesome! Let's do it again!}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Hey Patrick.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Yeah, Patrick, wait for me.}}
{{L|Patrick| Huh? SpongeBob? Oh come on, where are you hiding? This isn't funny! ''(Looking around)'' Huh. ''(Puts hands on hips)''}}
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick climb up the slide, falls back down]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| ''(Pokes Patrick)'' Patrick I'm right here.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Something tells me that is a one-way drain.}}
{{L|Patrick| ''(Looks at SpongeBob)'' Oh, hey SpongeBob! How'd ya get there?}}
{{L|''[Cut to SpongeBob and Patrick walking through a strange forest.]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Well, I was on this see-saw-}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[Groaning]'' How long have we been walking here, Patrick?}}
{{L|Patrick| ''(Yelling)'' SLIDE! ''(Bounces off of SpongeBob and onto slide. Patrick laughs and attempts to go down slide, but gets stuck and has to force himself down. The slide gets stuck to his bottom. Patrick tries to pull the slide off, but fails. The slide hits Patrick, and he goes flying.)''}}
{{L|Patrick|Well, that depends on who you ask.}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Patrick, do you need help?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Why?}}
{{L|Patrick| ''(Walks up to SpongeBob with side still stuck)'' Huh? With the slide stuck to my bottom? Nah, I want it there. ''(Patrick stands motionless for a second.)'' I hate you slide! ''(Pull slide off, flattening SpongeBob. SpongeBob sits motionless on the sand.)'' Oh, sorry SpongeBob. ''(Patrick pulls the slide off and throws it behind him)''}}
{{L|Patrick|Well, if you ask someone with a watch, they might be able to tell you.}}  
{{L|SpongeBob| ''(Wobbles back up)'' Hey look, a swingset! ''(Flops over to the swings, pulling himself back up)'' Can't go wrong with this old-time playground favorite. ''(SpongeBob swings on swingset.)'' Weee. Hey, this is almost like being at The Great Barrier Reef, huh? Try it, Patrick.}}
{{L|''[Monster growling]''}}
{{L|Patrick| Okay. ''(Patrick sits motionless on swing.)'' It's not working.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Are you getting hungry?}}
{{L|SpongeBob| ''(Swinging)'' Go back and forth like this. ''(Patrick starts swinging)'' There you go! Now you're getting into the... SWING of things! ''(Laughing)''}}
{{L|Patrick|Yeah! How'd you know?}}
{{L|Patrick| ''(Starts laughing)'' Hey, watch me go!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|I could hear your stomach growling. For a second I thought it was some scary monster coming to eat us.}}
*''(Patrick breaks the swingset and flies off, screaming)''
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick laughing]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Patrick?}}
{{L|Patrick|That's funny! Couldn't have been my stomach growling though.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|It couldn't?}}
{{L|Patrick| ''(Rolls into fence, breaking it and starts falling down a slide)''}}
{{L|Patrick|''[Poking stomach]'' Nope. I had its vocal cords removed before the trip.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Well, I could've sworn that I heard-}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Patrick! I'm coming!}}
{{L|''[Monster growling]''}}
 
{{L|Patrick|SpongeBob, I heard it! I heard growling!}}
*''(SpongeBob and Patrick slide down the water slide, screaming, while going down multiple sharp turns. SpongeBob and Patrick end up in a puddle)''
{{L|SpongeBob|No, that time it was my stomach. There's got to be something around here to eat. ''[Picks berry and puts it in mouth]'' Patrick, I found some berries we can- ''[SpongeBob inflates, body turns purple]'' not eat!}}
 
{{L|Patrick|''[Patrick eating]'' Thanks for the warning.}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Patrick?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, where did you get ''[Pulls out needle, pops self]'' the kelp cake?}}
 
{{L|Patrick|From the vending machine! ''[Camera pans to vending machine]''}}
{{L|Patrick| ''(Muffled)'' SpongeBob?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Oh.}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Patrick! Are you okay?}}
{{L|''[Monster growling]''}}
{{L|Patrick| No, I'm not okay.}}
{{L|Patrick|Was it your stomach that time too?}}
{{L|SpongeBob| You're not?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Nope. Run for your life!}}
{{L|Patrick| No, I'm great! That was awesome! Let's do it again!}}
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick run]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Yeah Patrick wait for me.}}
{{L|''[Small creature appears, growls]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|It's getting closer! ''[SpongeBob and Patrick almost fall of cliff]'' Oh no! It's a sheer drop-off! What do we do?}}
*''(SpongeBob and Patrick climb up the slide, falls back down)''
{{L|Patrick|Don't ask me! I don't remember "being eaten alive" on this trip's itinerary.}}  
 
{{L|SpongeBob|I'm too young to be digested! ''[Jumps onto Patrick, crying]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Something tells me that is a one-way drain.}}
{{L|Patrick|Wait, SpongeBob! I know how to get us out of this!}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|You do?}}
*''(Cut to SpongeBob and Patrick walking through a strange forest.)''
{{L|Patrick|I saw something like this in a movie once! Now watch closely, and do exactly what I do!}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Roger!}}
{{L|SpongeBob| ''(Groaning)'' How long have we been walking here, Patrick?}}
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick jump off of cliff]''}}
{{L|Patrick| Well, that depends on who you ask.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Okay, now what?}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Why?}}
{{L|Patrick|Uh... I'm not sure, I fell asleep in the second half of the movie!}}
{{L|Patrick| Well, if you ask someone with a watch, they might be able to tell you.}}  
{{L|''[Both screaming]''}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Well, I hope that monster's carrying some syrup!}}
*''(Monster growling)''
{{L|SpongeBob|Yeah, cause if he's eating us, he's having pancakes for lunch!}}
 
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick land on sea anemone, bounce off and land on plant. SpongeBob and Patrick laughing with heavy breath]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Are you getting hungry?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, we did it!}}
{{L|Patrick| Yeah! How'd you know?}}
{{L|Patrick|We're not gonna be eaten!}}
{{L|SpongeBob| I could hear your stomach growling. For a second I thought it was some scary monster coming to eat us.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Hooray for not being eaten!}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Hooray! ''[Laughing]''}}
*''(SpongeBob and Patrick laughing)''
{{L|SpongeBob & Patrick|We're not gonna be eaten! We're not gonna be eaten!}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Hey, SpongeBob?}}
{{L|Patrick| That's funny! Couldn't have been my stomach growling though.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Yeah, Patrick?}}
 
{{L|Patrick|All this not being eaten is making me hungry.}}
{{L|SpongeBob| It couldn't?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Oh, don't worry. When we get to The Great Barrier Reef, we'll eat like kings!}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Alright!}}
{{L|Patrick| ''(Poking stomach)'' Nope. I had its vocal cords removed before the trip.}}{{L|SpongeBob| Well, I coud've sworn that I heard-}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Alright! Now put 'er there, Patrick!}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Put 'er there!}}
*''(Monster growling)''
{{L|SpongeBob|Ooh Patrick, have you been using a different moisturizer? Your hands feel kind of- ''[Screaming]''}}
 
{{L|''[Monster appears behind Patrick]''}}
{{L|Patrick| SpongeBob, I heard it! I heard growling!}}
{{L|Patrick|Oh no, it's just the same old moisturizer I always use.}}
 
{{L|''[SpongeBob panicking]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| No, that time it was my stomach. There's got to be something around here to eat. ''(Picks berry and puts it in mouth)'' Patrick, I found some berries we can- ''(SpongeBob inflates, body turns purple)'' not eat!}}
{{L|Patrick|Oh, come on, SpongeBob, don't leave me hanging here!}}
{{L|Patrick| ''(Patrick eating)'' Thanks for the warning.}}
{{L|''[SpongeBob panicking]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Patrick, where did you get ''(Pulls out needle, pops self)'' the kelp cake?}}
{{L|Patrick|Let me guess, it's time to start screaming again?}}
{{L|Patrick| From the vending machine! ''(Camera pans to vending machine)''}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Wait a second. ''[Takes picture]'' Okay now. ''[Both screaming and running]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Oh.}}
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick fall, SpongeBob grabs onto a vine while Patrick grabs onto SpongeBob's legs]''}}
 
{{L|Patrick|SpongeBob, as much as I'd like to stay and hang around, I'm not sure now's the time.}}
*''(Monster growling)''
{{L|SpongeBob|I know Patrick, but now it seems to be- ''[Hands slip, SpongeBob starts hyperventilating]'' Our best possible course of action!}}
 
{{L|Patrick|''[Sweating]'' Well, I'd probably be really enjoying the view if I still had some blood flowing in my arms. Ow!}}
{{L|Patrick| Was it your stomach that time too?}}
{{L|''[Vine starts to break]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Nope. ...Run for your life!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Don't worry, Patrick, your blood flows not the only thing that's wearing thin! ''[Vine breaks, both screaming and swinging on a vine. SpongeBob sees different vine]'' Grab it, Patrick!}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Grabbing! ''[SpongeBob gets sleepy]'' Okay SpongeBob, your turn! SpongeBob!}}
*''(SpongeBob and Patrick run)''
{{L|SpongeBob|''[Snoring, wakes up and grabs vine]'' Oh, I got it!}}
*''(Small creature appears, growls)''
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick slide through the sand, land behind a rock]''}}
 
{{L|''[Monster looks around, shrugs and flies away]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| It's getting closer! ''(SpongeBob and Patrick almost fall of cliff)'' Oh no! It's a sheer drop-off! What do we do?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Whew, that was a close one, right Patrick?}}
{{L|Patrick| Don't ask me! I don't remember "being eaten alive" on this trip's itinerary.}}  
{{L|Patrick|Yeah, but it looks like everything worked out just... fine... ''[Patrick laughing]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| I'm too young to be digested! ''(Jumps onto Patrick, crying)''}}
{{L|''[Ringing noise]''}}
{{L|Patrick| Wait SpongeBob! I know how to get us out of this!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick... Patrick, did you hear that?}}
{{L|SpongeBob| You do?}}
{{L|Patrick|It sounded like it came from the other side of this big rock!}}
{{L|Patrick| I saw something like this in a movie once! Now watch closely, and do exactly what I do!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|This isn't a big rock, it's a big wall!}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Roger!}}
{{L|''[Camera zooms out to reveal "no parking" sign on brick wall]''}}
 
{{L|Patrick|Do you think it belongs to that gift shop right there?}}
*''(SpongeBob and Patrick jump off of cliff)''
{{L|''[Camera pans to gift shop]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|''[Walks up to gift shop]'' What would a gift shop be doing right in the middle of nowhere?}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Okay, now what?}}
{{L|Patrick|Uh... selling gifts?}}
{{L|Patrick| Uh... I'm not sure, I fell asleep in the second half of the movie!}}
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick enter gift shop]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|''[Looking around]'' Wow Patrick, look at all this stuff! ''[Taking multiple pictures]'' You gonna buy something?}}
*''(Both screaming)''
 
{{L|Patrick| Well I hope that monster's carrying some syrup!}}
{{L|SpongeBob| "Yeah cause if he's eating us, he's having pancakes for lunch!}}
 
*''(SpongeBob and Patrick land on sea anemone, bounce off and land on plant. SpongeBob and Patrick laughing with heavy breath)''
 
{{L|SpongeBob| Patrick, we did it!}}
{{L|Patrick| We're not gonna be eaten!}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Hooray for not being eaten!}}
{{L|Patrick| Hooray! (Laughing)}}
{{L|SpongeBob & Patrick| We're not gonna be eaten! We're not gonna be eaten!}}
 
{{L|Patrick| Hey SpongeBob?}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Yeah Patrick?}}
{{L|Patrick| All this not being eaten is making me hungry.}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Oh, don't worry. When we get to The Great Barrier Reef, we'll eat like kings!}}
{{L|Patrick| Alright!}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Alright! Now put 'er there, Patrick!}}
{{L|Patrick| Put 'er there!}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Ooh Patrick, have you been using a different moisturizer? Your hands feel kind of- ''(Screaming)''}}
 
*''(Monster appears behind Patrick)''
 
{{L|Patrick| Oh no, it's just the same old moisturizer I always use.}}
 
*''(SpongeBob panicking)''
 
{{L|Patrick| Oh come on SpongeBob, don't leave me hanging here!}}
 
*''(SpongeBob panicking)''
 
{{L|Patrick| Let me guess, it's time to start screaming again?}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Wait a second. ''(Takes picture)'' Okay now. ''(Both screaming and running)''}}
 
*''(SpongeBob and Patrick fall, Patrick grabs onto SpongeBob's legs)''
 
{{L|Patrick| SpongeBob, as much as I'd like to stay and hang around, I'm not sure now's the time.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob| I know Patrick, but now it seems to be- ''(Hands slip, SpongeBob starts hyperventilating)'' Our best possible course of action!}}
 
{{L|Patrick| ''(Sweating)'' Well, I'd probably be really enjoying the view if I still had some blood flowing in my arms. OW!}}
 
*''(Vine starts to break)''
 
{{L|SpongeBob| Don't worry Patrick, your patience isn't the only thing that's wearing thin! ''(Vine breaks, both screaming and swinging on a vine. SpongeBob sees different vine)'' Grab it Patrick!}}
 
{{L|Patrick| Grabbing! ''(SpongeBob gets sleepy)'' Okay SpongeBob, your turn! SpongeBob!}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob| ''(Snoring, wakes up and grabs vine)'' Oh I got it!}}
 
*''(SpongeBob and Patrick slide through the sand, land behind a rock)''
 
*''(Monster looks around, shrugs and flies away)''
 
{{L|SpongeBob| Whew, that was a close one, right Patrick?}}
 
{{L|Patrick| Yeah, but it looks like everything worked out just... fine... ''(Patrick laughing)''}}
 
*''(Ringing noise)''
 
{{L|SpongeBob| Patrick... Patrick, did you hear that?}}
 
{{L|Patrick| It sounded like it came from the other side of this big rock!}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob| This isn't a big rock, it's a big wall!)''}}
 
*''(Camera zooms out to reveal "no parking" sign on brick wall)''
 
{{L|Patrick| Do you think it belongs to that gift shop right there?}}
 
*''(Camera pans to gift shop)''
 
{{L|SpongeBob| ''(Walks up to gift shop)'' What would a gift shop be doing right in the middle of nowhere?}}
 
{{L|Patrick| Uh... selling gifts?}}
 
*''(SpongeBob and Patrick enter gift shop)''
 
{{L|SpongeBob| ''(Looking around)'' Wow Patrick, look at all this stuff! ''(Taking multiple pictures)'' You gonna buy something?}}
 
{{L|Patrick|No, I'm not in the market for any souvenirs.}}
{{L|Patrick|No, I'm not in the market for any souvenirs.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Oh, you could never have to many- ''[Gasps]'' Oh no! I just realized what this place is!}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Oh you could never have to many- ''(Gasps)'' Oh no! I just realized what this place is!}}
{{L|Patrick|You have?}}
{{L|Patrick| You have?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, we have walked straight into a ''[whispering]'' tourist trap.}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Patrick, we have walked straight into a (whispering) tourist trap.}}
{{L|Patrick|A trap!}}
{{L|Patrick| A TRAP!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Shhh...}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Shhh...}}
{{L|Patrick|''[Whispering]'' A trap!}}
{{L|Patrick| ''(Whispering)'' A trap!}} 
{{L|SpongeBob|''[Sweating]'' Come on. Let's escape, before we spend all our money on useless trinkets.}}
{{L|SpongeBob| ''(Sweating)'' Come on. Let's escape, before we spend all our money on useless trinkets.}}
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick tip-toeing out of gift shop]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, wait, I saw a very nice driftwood sculpture over there that would work great as a mantelpiece.}}
*''(SpongeBob and Patrick tip-toeing out of gift shop)''
{{L|Patrick|SpongeBob, no! ''[cries, as SpongeBob walks off-screen]''}}
 
{{L|''[Cuts to Patrick spelling his name in the sand, SpongeBob enters crying and carrying multiple shopping bags]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Patrick wait, I saw a very nice driftwood sculpture over there that would work great as a mantlepiece.}}
{{L|Patrick|SpongeBob!}}
{{L|Patrick| SpongeBob no!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, that tourist shop took me for everything I had! Now we don't have any money, we're still lost, and we're gonna be in big trouble! Oh, this vacation is a disaster!}}
 
{{L|Patrick|SpongeBob I-}}
*(Cuts to Patrick spelling his name in the sand, SpongeBob enters crying and carrying multiple shopping bags)
{{L|''[SpongeBob bursts into tears and speaks gibberish]''}}
 
{{L|Patrick|I don't think this vacation has been a disaster.}}
{{L|Patrick| SpongeBob!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|You don't?}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Patrick that tourist shop took me for everything I had! Now we don't have any money, we're still lost, and we're gonna be in big trouble! Oh this vacation is a disaster!}}
{{L|Patrick|''[Picks up brochure, opens]'' No! Of course not, see?! We did everything we dreamed of doing at The Great Barrier Reef.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, you're right! We went down a sewage pipe...}}
{{L|Patrick| SpongeBob I-}}
{{L|Patrick|Like a slide.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Bounced off a huge anemone...}}
*''(SpongeBob bursts into tears)'' 
{{L|Patrick|Like a trampoline.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Hid in a nest!}}
{{L|Patrick| I don't think this vacation has been a disaster.}}
{{L|Patrick|Like a fort!}}
{{L|SpongeBob| You don't?}}
{{L|SpongeBob|And swung on some vines! Which are a lot like ropes! This vacation has it all!}}
{{L|Patrick| ''(Picks up brochure, opens)'' No! Of course not, see?! We did everything we dreamed of doing at The Great Barrier Reef.}}
{{L|Patrick|''[Closes brochure]'' All except for one thing.}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Patrick you're right! We went down a sewage pipe...}}
{{L|SpongeBob|What's that?}}
{{L|Patrick| Like a slide.}}
{{L|Patrick|A way out of here.}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Bounced off a huge anemone...}}
{{L|SpongeBob|My poor parents must be worried sick.}}
{{L|Patrick| Like a trampoline.}}
{{L|Patrick|I suggest we take a nap here until they come and find us! That way we'll be well-rested on the way home.}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Hid in a nest!}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[Walking away, Leaving his bags.]'' I suggest we start walking.}}
{{L|Patrick| Like a fort!}}
{{L|Patrick|I was afraid he was gonna suggest that.}}
{{L|SpongeBob| And swung on some vines! Which are a lot like ropes! This vacation has it all!}}
{{L|''[Cuts to SpongeBob and Patrick, singing The Road Song with tired, dry voices]''}}
{{L|Patrick| ''(Closes brochure)'' All except for one thing.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[With tired, dry voice]'' ♪When I'm on the road...}}
{{L|SpongeBob| What's that?}}
{{L|Patrick|''[With tired, dry voice]'' ♪I see stuff going by.}}
{{L|Patrick| A way out of here.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[With tired, dry voice]'' ♪When I'm on the road...}}
{{L|SpongeBob| My poor parents must be worried sick.}}
{{L|Patrick|''[With tired, dry voice]'' ♪Got a bug in my eye.♪}}
{{L|Patrick| I suggest we take a nap here until they come and find us! That way we'll be well-rested on the way home.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[With tired, dry voice]'' ♪When I'm on the road...}}
{{L|SpongeBob| ''(Walking away, Leaving his bags.)'' I suggest we start walking.}}
{{L|Patrick|''[With tired, dry voice]'' ♪Looks like clear skies ahead.}}
{{L|Patrick| I was afraid he was gonna suggest that.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|''[With tired, dry voice]'' ♪When I'm...♪ ''[Coughing]'' ♪...on the road...♪}}
 
{{L|Patrick|''[With tired, dry voice]'' ♪Please stop touching my head.}}
*''(Cuts to SpongeBob and Patrick, singing The Road Song with tired, dry voices)''
{{L|SpongeBob|''[With tired, dry voice]'' ♪Let's all sing the road song.♪ ''[Clap Clap!]'' ♪I wanna sing it all day long. Let's all sing the...♪ ''[Coughing]''}}
 
{{L|Patrick|SpongeBob, maybe we oughta take a break from the singing for a while.}}
{{L|Patrick| SpongeBob, maybe we oughta take a break from the singing for a while.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|Good idea, Patrick. I'll just play the road song on this whistle I got from the souvenir shop.}}
 
{{L|''[SpongeBob playing The Road Song on whistle. SpongeBob and Patrick passes Harold and Margaret without noticing]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Good idea Patrick. I'll just play the road song on this whistle I got from the souvenir shop.}}
{{L|Harold|Oh, hey, son, we're ready to go.}}
 
{{L|''[SpongeBob continues playing, multiple animals begin to follow as he walks with Patrick through the forest]''}}
*''(SpongeBob playing The Road Song on whistle)''
{{L|Patrick|Wow, SpongeBob, you're pretty good with that thing.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Well, thanks, Patrick, glad you think so.}}
{{L|Harold| Oh hey son, we're ready to go.}}
{{L|Patrick|Apparently I'm not the only one who does.}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|What do you mean? Who else could- ''[Camera zooms out to reveal the monster]'' Oh no, not again}}
*''(SpongeBob continues playing, multiple animals begin to follow as he walks with Patrick through the forrest)''
{{L|''[The monster drops to the floor]''}}
 
{{L|Patrick|The whistle seems to have soothed it.}}
{{L|Patrick| Wow SpongeBob, you're pretty good with that thing.}}
{{L|SpongeBob|I think it's offering us a ride!}}
{{L|SpongeBob| Well thanks Patrick, glad you think so.}}
{{L|''[fruit fly points to its back]''}}
{{L|Patrick| Apparently I'm not the only one who does.}}
{{L|''[cuts to SpongeBob and Patrick on top of the monster]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| What do you mean? Who else could- ''(Camera zooms out to reveal the monster)'' Oh no not again.}}
{{L|Patrick|♪Road! Road! Road! Road! Road! Road!♪ ''[Continues throughout song]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|♪When I'm above the road... All I see is sky. When I'm above the road... On a giant fruit fly. When I'm above the road...♪}}
*''(The monster drops to the floor)''
{{L|SpongeBob & Patrick|♪He used to fill us with dread.♪ ''[Scream]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|♪When I'm above the road... I'm as snug as a baby bug in bed! Let's all sing the Above the Road Song!♪ ''[Clap Clap!]'' ♪I wanna sing it all day long! Let's all sing the Above the Road Song!♪ ''[Clap Clap!]'' ♪Let's all sing along!♪}}
{{L|Patrick| The whistle seems to have soothed it.}}
{{L|Patrick|Duh.}}
{{L|SpongeBob| I think it's offering us a ride!}}
{{L|''[Giant fruit fly drops SpongeBob and Patrick back onto playground]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Thanks again! Patrick, I think that is the friendliest terrifyingly large insect I have ever had the pleasure of being carried off by.}}
*''(fruit fly points to its back)''
{{L|Patrick|Me too.}}
 
{{L|''[Margaret and Harold pull up in the car]''}}
*''(Cuts to SpongeBob and Patrick on top of the monster)''
{{L|Margaret|SpongeBob? Oh, there you are!}}
 
{{L|Harold|Okay, boys, the boat is as good as new and we've got miles and miles of open road ahead of us.}}
{{L|Patrick| Road. Road. Road. Road. Road. Road. ''(Continues throughout song)''}}
{{L|Margaret|Boys?}}
 
{{L|''[Cuts to SpongeBob and Patrick sleeping]''}}
{{L|SpongeBob| When I'm above the road. All I see is sky. When I'm above the road. On a giant fruit fly. When I'm above the road.}}
{{L|Margaret|Do something, Harold!}}
 
{{L|Harold|He's your son, Margaret. He's your son.}}
{{L|SpongeBob & Patrick| He used to fill us with dread. ''(Scream)''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob| When I'm above the road. I'm as snug as a baby bug in bed. Let's all sing the above the road song. I wanna sing it all day long. Let's all sing the above the road song. ''(Clap Clap!)'' Let's all sing alonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnng.}}
 
{{L|Patrick| Duh.}}
 
*''(Giant Fruit fly drops SpongeBob and Patrick back onto playground)''
 
{{L|SpongeBob| Thanks again. Patrick I think that is the friendliest terrifyingly large insect I have ever had the pleasure of being carried off by.}}
 
{{L|Patrick| Me too.}}
 
*''(Margaret and Harold pull up in the car)''
 
{{L|Margaret| SpongeBob? Oh there you are!}}
{{L|Harold| Okay boys, the boat is as good as new and we've got miles and miles of open road ahead of us.}}
{{L|Margaret| Boys?}}
 
*''(Cuts to SpongeBob and Patrick sleeping)''
 
{{L|Margaret| Do something, Harold!}}
{{L|Harold| He's your son, Margaret. He's your son.}}

Latest revision as of 08:51, 3 June 2025

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