Breath of Fresh Squidward/transcript: Difference between revisions
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{{L|Squidward|--for as long as time shall stand.}} | {{L|Squidward|--for as long as time shall stand.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|Uh, Squidward?}} | {{L|SpongeBob|Uh, Squidward?}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|What? ''[sun | {{L|Squidward|What? ''[the sun can be seen rising outside]''}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob and Patrick|Oh.}} | {{L|SpongeBob and Patrick|Oh.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|Thanks for sharing this moment with us, Squidward.}} | {{L|SpongeBob|Thanks for sharing this moment with us, Squidward.}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Get out! ''[ | {{L|Squidward|Get out! ''[later that morning, Squidward is putting up a fence around his house]'' Perfect.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|Wow, that's a nice one. Thanks for inviting us to your big fencewarming party.}} | {{L|SpongeBob|Wow, that's a nice one. Thanks for inviting us to your big fencewarming party.}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Oh, of course. Come, have a seat. The picnic's about to start. ''[cut to later]''}} | {{L|Squidward|Oh, of course. Come, have a seat. The picnic's about to start. ''[cut to later]''}} | ||
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{{L|Patrick|Uh, new glasses?}} | {{L|Patrick|Uh, new glasses?}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|No, no. I mean he seems happier.}} | {{L|SpongeBob|No, no. I mean he seems happier.}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|''[ | {{L|Squidward|''[calling from his bedroom window]'' Good night, Bikini Bottom. I love you! ''[closes the window]''}} | ||
{{L|Patrick|He's probably happy about his new glasses. ''[cut to | {{L|Patrick|He's probably happy about his new glasses.}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Good morning, SpongeBob | {{L|''[cut to exterior of SpongeBob's pineapple at sunrise. The rooster crows, light slowly fills SpongeBob's room, and then his foghorn alarm sounds. SpongeBob wakes up. He goes to turn off his alarm, but he pokes Squidward's nose instead.]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Good morning, SpongeBob. ''[as the alarm goes off again]'' Hoooonk!}} | |||
{{L|SpongeBob|Squidward, what are you doing here?}} | {{L|SpongeBob|Squidward, what are you doing here?}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|You were right, SpongeBob. Watching the sunrise together is much better.}} | {{L|Squidward|You were right, SpongeBob. Watching the sunrise together is much better.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|''[laughs]'' Oh, yeah. I forgot. The new Squidward. ''[gets out of bed]'' I guess I better get ready for work. Boy, the new Squidward sure is friendly. ''[SpongeBob reads the newspaper while sipping his coffee cup.]'' The new Squidward sure is helpful. ''[ | {{L|SpongeBob|''[laughs]'' Oh, yeah. I forgot. The new Squidward. ''[gets out of bed]'' I guess I better get ready for work. Boy, the new Squidward sure is friendly. ''[SpongeBob reads the newspaper while sipping his coffee cup.]'' The new Squidward sure is helpful. ''[SpongeBob finishes brushing his teeth, but is surprised when Squidward starts flossing them for him]'' Huh? The new Squidward sure is hygienic. ''[SpongeBob and Squidward leave for work together]'' Boy—the new Squidward sure is chummy. ''[wanting a little personal space, he moves to the right side of the driveway, but Squidward does too; cut to the Krusty Krab]'' Ah, this is more like it. Just me, my grill, and you, Mr. Smiley Face Krabby Patty. No one can come between us. ''[Squidward squeezes between them.]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Hello, SpongeBob.}} | {{L|Squidward|Hello, SpongeBob.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|''[screams]'' S-S-Squidward! Aren't you supposed to be out front?}} | {{L|SpongeBob|''[screams]'' S-S-Squidward! Aren't you supposed to be out front?}} | ||
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{{L|Mr. Krabs|Did someone just say "free"? IN MY RESTAURANT?!? ''[runs out of his office]'' What's the problem here?}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Did someone just say "free"? IN MY RESTAURANT?!? ''[runs out of his office]'' What's the problem here?}} | ||
{{L|Sadie|That man was being nice to my little girl.}} | {{L|Sadie|That man was being nice to my little girl.}} | ||
{{L|Little Kid Fish|He- he-- he asked me if I wanted tartar sauce, ''[ | {{L|Little Kid Fish|He- he-- he asked me if I wanted tartar sauce, ''[she shows Mr. Krabs the Krusty Krab hat Squidward gave her]'' and then he gave me a free hat!}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Free?! ''[eyes dry up]'' Mr. Squidward!}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Free?! ''[eyes dry up]'' Mr. Squidward!}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Yes, sir.}} | {{L|Squidward|Yes, sir.}} | ||
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{{L|Mr. Krabs|They look okay to me.}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|They look okay to me.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|But he's not a real fry cook.}} | {{L|SpongeBob|But he's not a real fry cook.}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|He is now. Give him an apron and put him to work. You know, he might be as good a fry cook as you. ''[SpongeBob whimpers. Cut to later where both SpongeBob and Squidward are at the grill.]''}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|He is now. Give him an apron and put him to work. You know, he might be as good a fry cook as you. ''[SpongeBob whimpers and his eyes get so small they fall out. Cut to later where both SpongeBob and Squidward are at the grill.]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Wow, SpongeBob! You've been Employee of the Month a gazillion times. I wish I could be employee of the month.}} | {{L|Squidward|Wow, SpongeBob! You've been Employee of the Month a gazillion times. I wish I could be employee of the month.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|Actually, Squidward, in point of fact, I've been Employee of the Month a gazillion and six times. Keep dreaming.}} | {{L|SpongeBob|Actually, Squidward, in point of fact, I've been Employee of the Month a gazillion and six times. Keep dreaming.}} | ||
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{{L|SpongeBob|What's wrong with it?}} | {{L|SpongeBob|What's wrong with it?}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|A smiley face with dimples? ''[Mr. Krabs shows a patty with a smiley face and dimples.]''}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|A smiley face with dimples? ''[Mr. Krabs shows a patty with a smiley face and dimples.]''}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|''[screams]'' Dimples? It was him! No, Squidward did it.}} | {{L|SpongeBob|''[screams]'' Dimples? It was him! No, Squidward did it. ''[smiles smugly, expecting Mr. Krabs to be upset at Squidward]''}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Mr. Squidward?}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Mr. Squidward?}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Yes, sir.}} | {{L|Squidward|Yes, sir.}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|I have one thing to say to you, | {{L|Mr. Krabs|I have one thing to say to you, mister. Oh, I just love the little ketchup dimples you do! ''[SpongeBob's eyes and mouth open wide and he freezes]'' You're the new Employee of the Month. ''[takes his picture. Shocked, SpongeBob breaks into pieces.]''}} | ||
{{L|Patrick|''[walks into The Krusty Krab with a pink box in his hand]'' Special delivery. For this month's Employee of the Month. I wonder who it could be. As if I didn't know. ''[SpongeBob doesn't say move.]'' No, really. who is it? I don't know.}} | {{L|Patrick|''[walks into The Krusty Krab with a pink box in his hand]'' Special delivery. For this month's Employee of the Month. I wonder who it could be. As if I didn't know. ''[SpongeBob doesn't say move.]'' No, really. who is it? I don't know.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|The guy you're looking for is over there. ''[points to a crowd of customers and Mr. Krabs throwing Squidward up into the air with excitement | {{L|SpongeBob|The guy you're looking for is over there. ''[points to a crowd of customers and Mr. Krabs throwing Squidward up into the air with excitement, then starts crying softly]''}} | ||
{{L|Patrick|Oh. SpongeBob?}} | {{L|Patrick|Oh. SpongeBob?}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|Yes?}} | {{L|SpongeBob|Yes?}} | ||
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{{L|Patrick|Help me spell 'Squidward'. ''[opens up the pink box to reveal a cake that reads "Congratulations SpongeBob: Employee of the Month"]''}} | {{L|Patrick|Help me spell 'Squidward'. ''[opens up the pink box to reveal a cake that reads "Congratulations SpongeBob: Employee of the Month"]''}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|Okay. ''[changes "SpongeBob" to "Squidward"]''}} | {{L|SpongeBob|Okay. ''[changes "SpongeBob" to "Squidward"]''}} | ||
{{L|Patrick|Thanks, SpongeBob. Party at my house! ''[cut to Patrick's house where they have the party and a banner reading "Squidward Rocks" is put up and everyone, including Squidward is in a conga line]''}} | {{L|Patrick|Thanks, SpongeBob. Party at my house! ''[cut to Patrick's house where they have the party and a banner reading "Squidward Rocks" is put up and everyone, including Squidward is in a conga line. SpongeBob, however, chooses to sit at a table by himself and stare at his piece of cake]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Enjoying the party, SpongeBob? How's the cake, SpongeBob?}} | {{L|Squidward|Enjoying the party, SpongeBob? ''[SpongeBob sniffles]'' How's the cake, SpongeBob?}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|It's okay, Squidward. It's a very okay cake. ''[sniffles]''}} | {{L|SpongeBob|It's okay, Squidward. ''[sniffles]'' It's a very okay cake. ''[sniffles]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|I love being Employee of the Month.}} | {{L|Squidward|I love being Employee of the Month.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|Oh, so what if New Squidward is a better cook than you? Doesn't matter. And so what if Squidward replaced you as Employee of the Month? And so what if New Squidward is pogo-dancing with your best friend? ''[ | {{L|SpongeBob|Oh, so what if New Squidward is a better cook than you? ''[sniffles yet again]'' Doesn't matter. And so what if Squidward replaced you as Employee of the Month? And so what if New Squidward is pogo-dancing with your best friend? ''[gasps loudly as his eyes get exaggeratedly wide and bloodshot]'' Pogo-dancing with your best friend?!? ''[Patrick and Squidward are bouncing on pogo sticks. SpongeBob whimpers then gets angry]'' STOP! ''[the party stops]'' Maybe you can take my job, and maybe you can take my place on the Employee of the Month Wall of Fame. But nobody and I mean nobody, pogo-dances with that guy ''[points to Patrick]'' but me. Now do yourself a big fat favor and get out, bub! ''[Squidward tearfully leaves and goes over to touch the doorknob on the electric fence, which is still on, and gets electrocuted, causing the power in Patrick's rock to go out for a second. Cut to SpongeBob and Patrick, who are on pogo sticks]'' You know, Patrick. maybe I was a little hard on New Squidward. I mean, he might be a good fry cook. and he might have his picture on the wall, but I still have the best friend in the world ''[gasps]'' I know. I'll go apologize. Come on. ''[goes over to Squidward, still being electrocuted]'' Squidward, I just want to say I'm sorry for being so selfish, and yelling at you and all. I mean, who cares about cooking, pictures on the wall and dancing. We're bigger than that, right? So, if you're willing to let bygones be bygones, then I'm willing to meet you half way. What do you say, buddy? Put her there.}} | ||
{{L|Patrick|He's too proud.}} | {{L|Patrick|He's too proud.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|Oh, I'll just meet you all the way. Lay one on me, pal. ''[grabs Squidward's hand and gets electrocuted, too]''}} | {{L|SpongeBob|Oh, I'll just meet you all the way. Lay one on me, pal. ''[grabs Squidward's hand and gets electrocuted, too]''}} | ||
{{L|Patrick|Hey, I want to dance funny, too! ''[gets electrocuted, too. The OFF/ON switch explodes and the electric fence is no more.]''}} | {{L|Patrick|Hey, I want to dance funny, too! ''[gets electrocuted, too. The OFF/ON switch explodes and the electric fence is no more.]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|SpongeBob! Patrick! What are you two still doing here?}} | {{L|Squidward|SpongeBob! Patrick! What are you two still doing here?}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|''[ | {{L|''[the electric fence has turned SpongeBob and Patrick mean, like Squidward]''}} | ||
{{L|Patrick|''[ | {{L|SpongeBob|''[nasal voice]'' What are you talking about?}} | ||
{{L|Patrick|''[nasal voice]'' Yeah, what's the big idea? ''[SpongeBob and Squidward start bickering simultaneously]'' I don't need this aggravation! ''Why'' are you still standing here?!}} | |||
[[Category:Episode transcripts]] | [[Category:Episode transcripts]] | ||
Revision as of 17:45, 4 April 2016
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