Don't Make Me Laugh/transcript

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This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "Don't Make Me Laugh" from season 14, which aired on February 12, 2024.

• [The episode opens at the Reef Theater, where SpongeBob and Patrick approach the snack booth.]
• SpongeBob: I love going to the movies. The sticky floors that make me feel grounded.
• Patrick: I can't wait for you to see this movie, SpongeBob. It's the funniest thing I've never seen in your life. There's this one part where this guy... [laughs]
• SpongeBob: Two combos, please.
• Patrick: ...is wearing a hat. [laughs]
• SpongeBo: No spoilers, Patrick.
• [Their feet stick to the floor as SpongeBob and Patrick find their seats.]
• SpongeBob: "Prudence in Love"? That doesn't sound funny. Patrick, are you sure we're in the right theater?
• Patrick: [laughs] Shh!
• [The scene cuts to black and white footage showcasing a Victorian man and women.]
• Nathaniel: I love you Prudence.
• Prudence: And I love you Nathaniel.
• Nathaniel: But I love you more, Prudence.
• Prudence: Then I love you slightly more than that, Nathaniel.
• Nathaniel: It's not a competition, Prudence.
• Prudence: But if it were, I'd be winning.
• [The scene cuts back to SpongeBob and Patrick.]
• SpongeBob: Aw, this is so sweet. [whispers] But it's not funny.
• [Patrick starts laughing.]
• SpongeBob:' But your laughter is so infectious [he starts laughing with Patrick, and everyone in the theater glares at them]
• French Narrator: [the scene fades into SpongeBob's brain as a gear stick being shift into high gear] And just then, all the years of excessive laughing finally took their toll, and SpongeBob's funny bone got stuck in high gear.
• [SpongeBob continues laughing.]
• Patrick: It's not that funny, SpongeBob.
• [The actors glare onscreen.]
• Prudence: Hey, what are you laughing at? This is a melodrama, not a comedy.
• Nathaniel: Yes! Take a hike, Chuckles.
• [Everyone in the theater boos at SpongeBob.]
• Patrick: Can you believe this guy, laughing all thorough the movie like that?
• Usher: Who is making all that noise?
• [A flashlight shines at SpongeBob.]
• Usher: All right, laughing boy, take your hardy har hars outside!
• [The audience starts cheering.]
• [The usher kicks SpongeBob out of the theater. He lands in a dumpster, then emerges while still laughing.]
• SpongeBob: Huh? Uh-oh. Why can't-- Why can't I stop laughing?