Chocolate with Nuts/transcript

(Spongebob is humming inside of his mailbox, he checks his watch. The mailman opens the mailbox.)

Spongebob: Hi Mailman!

(The mailman yells in fear and runs off)

Spongebob: O.K, see you tomorrow!

(Spongebob gets out of the mailbox. Patrick walks up.)

Patrick: Hey, the mails here! What did you get?

Spongebob: Let's see... (Looks through the mail) Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Hey! A magazine!

(Spongebob looks at the magazine)

Spongebob: That's funny, I don't remember subscribing to Fancy Living Digest.

Spongebob and Patrick: (They look inside the magazine) WHOOOOOOOOOAAAAH!!

Spongebob: Look at all these glossy depictions of a higher standard of living!

(A picture of a rich person's swimming pool is shown)

Spongebob: This guy's so rich, he has a swimming pool in his swimming pool!

(A picture is shown of an old, rich person surrounded with bags of money)

Patrick: (Points at the man's feet) This guy's got shoes!

Squidward: Give me that! (Takes the magazine) Stealing my mail, eh? You're lucky I don't report you to the authorities!

Spongebob: Hey Squidward, how do the people in that magazine get all that money?

Squidward: They're entrepreneurs. They sell things to people.

Spongebob: What kind of things?

Squidward: How should I know? Things people wanna buy! (walks off) Now keep your paws off my mail.

Spongebob: That's it, Patrick! We gotta becomes entrepreneurs!

Patrick: Is that gonna hurt?

Spongebob: Quick Patrick, without thinking, if you could have anything in the world right now, what would it be?

Patrick: Uh... (sweats) More time for thinking.

Spongebob: No, something real, an item, something you would pay for.

Patrick: A chocolate bar?

Spongebob: That's a great idea, Pat! We'll become traveling chocolate bar salesmen!

(The scene changes to Spongebob and Patrick exiting the Barg'n-Mart carrying many chocolate bars)

Spongebob: Fancy living, here we come!

Patrick: Make way for a couple of entrepreneurs!

(Spongebob and Patrick walk up to a house)

Spongebob: O.K. Patrick, this is it! The first step on our road to living fancy! Just follow my lead.

(Spongebob runs up and knocks on the door, a fish opens the door)

Spongebob: Good afternoon sir, could we interest you in some (holds up chocolate bar) chocolate?

Fish: Chocolate? Did you say... CHOCOLATE?

Patrick: Yes sir. With or without nuts?

Fish: Chocolate? CHOCOLATE?! CHOCOLAAAATE! CHOCOLAAAATE!

(Spongebob and Patrick slowly back away then run off. The fish chases them while screaming CHOCOLAAATE!!)

(The scene cuts to Spongebob ringing the doorbell of another house)

Spongebob: O.K, the first guy didn't count. This is our REAL first step!

(A Salesman opens the door.)

Spongebob: Good Morning, sir! Would you like to buy some chocolate?

Salesman: Chocolate bars, eh?

Spongebob: Yes sir, we ARE chocolate bar salesmen!

Salesman: Ha! A couple of mediocre salesmen if you ask me. That's no way to carry your merchandise!

(Patrick is shown holding many chocolate bars in his pants)

Salesman: No, no no no, WRONG. You guys wanna be good salesmen, right?

Spongebob and Patrick: Oh, most certainly, sir!

Salesman: Well, (chuckles) no self respecting candy bar salesman would be caught dead without one of these! (He holds up a bright-orange bag)

Spongebob: Woooooooow... what is it?

Salesman: It's a candy bar bag, you knuckle-head! It's specially designed to cradle each candy bar in velvet-lined comfort!

(Spongebob tries to touch it)

Salesman: (pulls bag away) BUT, I'm wasting my time. (Walks inside) You don't need these bags.

Spongebob and Patrick: We need 'em! We need 'em!

(The Salesman grins, the scene changes to the Salesman counting money. Spongebob and Patrick are walking away with armfuls of bags)

Salesman: So long, boys! Happy hunting!

((((MORE TO COME))))