Food PBFFT! Truck/transcript

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This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "Food PBFFT! Truck" from season 13, which aired on May 13, 2022.

• [The episode begins at the Krusty Krab, which is busy with customers.]
• Mr. Krabs: Woohoo! Me restaurant is packed to the gills with customers and their money! [laughs]
• [A crowd of customers run up to Squidward and give him their money. He puts it in the cash register, which overflows and the money flies out.]
• Squidward: Mr. Krabs, the register is full again.
• Mr. Krabs: I got it, Mr. Squidward. [He vacuums up the loose money as he laughs] Ooh. [He vacuums up one extra dollar from inside Squidward's nose.] Ooh, hmm. [He walks outside of the restaurant and steals money from the long line of customers. He sees Incidental 37A standing outside.] Hey, why aren't you in line? Don't you want a Krabby Patty?
• Incidental 37A: I'd love one, but it's so far away. [A food truck appears and gives him a burger and a drink. He takes a bite of the burger.] Not quite as good as a Krabby Patty, but I didn't have to move one inch. [He takes another bite of the burger and walks away.]
• Mr. Krabs: [Angrily] That food truck stole me customer. Well, if the customers won't come to the Krusty Krab, I'll bring the Krusty Krab to them.
• [Bubble transition to the next scene, where SpongeBob, Mr. Krabs, and Squidward are outside the Krusty Krab. There is also a large object covered by a curtain.]
• Squidward: Mr. Krabs, what are we doing out here?
• Mr. Krabs: Your generous employer has a surprise for you.
• SpongeBob: [Jumps in the air] I love your surprises, Mr. Krabs. My favorite surprise was the rubber check. [He pulls a check made out of rubber from his pocket and bounces it on the ground.]
• Mr. Krabs: Yeah, that was a good one. [He pulls the curtain off the large object revealing it is a Krusty Krab food truck.] Behold! Me brand new to me food truck, the Krusty Kruiser. [He taps the truck and the bumper falls off] Uh-oh.
• Squidward: What a hunk of junk.
• SpongeBob: More like a big hunk of gorgeous.
• We won't sell any patties from that old jalopy.
• Mr. Krabs: You better sell a patty or you better not come back! [He bends Squidward and uses him as a crank to start the food truck. He then puts Squidward in the driver's seat.] Oh, and Mr. Squidward, you're driving.
• [Squidward groans and SpongeBob climbs into the truck through the window.]
• SpongeBob: Ooh, I can navigate. [He holds up a small telescope to his eye.]
• Squidward: [Sarcastically] Oh boy.
• SpongeBob: Customers, ho.
• Mr. Krabs: Get going!
• [Bubble transition to the next scene, where the Krusty Kruiser is driving through Bikini Bottom.]
• SpongeBob: [His eye is looking through a telescope on the roof of the vehicle.] Now, all we need is a parking spot next to lots of hungry customers. Ooh! [It shows a group of four fish talking.] That looks like a good spot, Squidward. [They try parking there, but a truck carrying a vat of grease steals the spot.] Huh?
• Squidward: That's my spot, you creep.
• [The large vat of grease spills on the Krusty Kruiser, frying it as it drives away.]
• SpongeBob: [Looking out the window and pointing to another group of fish] Ooh, try over there.
• [The windshield wipers on the truck activate to clear the grease as it turns around and parks near the fish. Another food truck kparks there, sending SpongeBob, Squidward, and their food truck flying into a building that it crashes into.]
• SpongeBob: [Inside one of the truck's storage compartments
• Squidward: Shut it. [He closes the compartment door.]
• [Bubble transition to several construction worker fish working. The food truck drives by them.]
• SpongeBob: Construction workers are always hungry. [The truck stops in front of the fish and SpongeBob pokes his head out the window] Krabby Patties! Get your red-hot Krabby Patties! [He laughs and quickly makes a Krabby Patty. Another truck labeled "Crane Crepes" drives up with Incidental 39 driving it.]
• Incidental 39: Hey, you claim jumpers! This is my turf. [He uses a large magnet on the top of the truck to grab the construction workers and move them to behind the food truck.] Bon appetit.
• [Bubble transition to the next scene.]