Band Geeks/transcript: Difference between revisions
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{{L|''[The episode begins at Squidward's house. A sound is heard, which turns out to be Squidward playing his clarinet until the doorbell rings. | {{L|''[The episode begins at Squidward's house. A sound is heard, which turns out to be Squidward playing his clarinet until the doorbell rings. Dr. Gilliam is at the door with Incidental 26.]''}} | ||
{{L| | {{L|Gilliam|Yeah, uhh, we're with the pet hospital down the street and I understand that you have a dying animal on the premises.}} | ||
{{L|''[Squidward slams the door shut. The phone starts to ring.]''}} | {{L|''[Squidward slams the door shut. The phone starts to ring.]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Hello. You've reached the house of unrecognized talent. Please start after the... ''[plays a clarinet note.]''}} | {{L|Squidward|Hello. You've reached the house of unrecognized talent. Please start after the... ''[plays a clarinet note.]''}} | ||
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{{L|Squidward|Ohh, uhh, I, I, I, I uhh...}} | {{L|Squidward|Ohh, uhh, I, I, I, I uhh...}} | ||
{{L|Squilliam|I knew it! You don't even have a band! Well, I'll just let you get back to the service industry now.}} | {{L|Squilliam|I knew it! You don't even have a band! Well, I'll just let you get back to the service industry now.}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Hold it! It just so happens that I ''don't'' sell fast food, I ''do'' have a band, and we're gonna play that Bubble Bowl! How do you like that, Fancy Boy?!}} | {{L|Squidward|Hold it! It just so happens that I '''''don't''''' sell fast food, I '''''do''''' have a band, and we're gonna play that Bubble Bowl! How do you like that, Fancy Boy?!}} | ||
{{L|Squilliam|Good luck next Tuesday. I hope the audience brings lots of... ibuprofen!}} | {{L|Squilliam|Good luck next Tuesday. I hope the audience brings lots of... '''''ibuprofen'''''!}} | ||
{{L|''[Squilliam and Squidward hang up the phones.]''}} | {{L|''[Squilliam and Squidward hang up the phones.]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|I've got to drum up a marching band fast! Drum... haha... band humor.}} | {{L|Squidward|I've got to drum up a marching band fast! Drum... haha... band humor.}} | ||
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{{L|''[Squidward slaps his tentacle leg and laughs. Everyone stays silent.]''}} | {{L|''[Squidward slaps his tentacle leg and laughs. Everyone stays silent.]''}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|When do we get the free food?}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|When do we get the free food?}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Okay, try to repeat after me. ''[plays six notes on his clarinet]'' Brass section, go. ''[brass section repeats badly]'' Good. Now the wind. ''[wind section repeats badly]'' And the drums. ''[drummers misunderstand what Squidward means, so they blow on their sticks which | {{L|Squidward|Okay, try to repeat after me. ''[plays six notes on his clarinet]'' Brass section, go. ''[brass section repeats badly]'' Good. Now the wind. ''[wind section repeats badly]'' And the drums. ''[drummers misunderstand what Squidward means, so they blow on their sticks which shoot out of their mouths and stick him to the wall]'' Too bad that didn't kill me. ''[Bubble transition]'' Let's just try stepping in rhythm. Now I want everyone to stand in straight rows of five.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|''[raises hand]'' Is this the part where we start kicking?}} | {{L|SpongeBob|''[raises hand]'' Is this the part where we start kicking?}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|No, SpongeBob, that's a chorus line.}} | {{L|Squidward|No, SpongeBob, that's a chorus line.}} | ||
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{{L|''[Screen cuts to the outside of the music school and a blast of noise ensues, breaking the windows. Cuts back inside the music school, where Squidward's face is deformed beyond recognition, his shirt's been ripped, and his baton breaks]''}} | {{L|''[Screen cuts to the outside of the music school and a blast of noise ensues, breaking the windows. Cuts back inside the music school, where Squidward's face is deformed beyond recognition, his shirt's been ripped, and his baton breaks]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Okay, new theory. Maybe we should play so quietly, no one can hear us.}} | {{L|Squidward|Okay, new theory. Maybe we should play so quietly, no one can hear us.}} | ||
{{L| | {{L|Harold|Well, maybe we wouldn't sound so bad if some people didn't try to play with big, meaty claws!}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|What did you say, punk?!}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|What did you say, punk?!}} | ||
{{L| | {{L|Harold|''[shouts loudly]'' Big... meaty... ''claws''!}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Well, these claws ain't for just attractin' mates!}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Well, these claws ain't for just attractin' mates!}} | ||
{{L| | {{L|Harold|Bring it on, old man! Bring it on!}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|''[tries intervening]'' No, people. Let's be smart and bring it ''off.''}} | {{L|SpongeBob|''[tries intervening]'' No, people. Let's be smart and bring it ''off.''}} | ||
{{L|Incidental 7|Oh, so now the talking cheese is gonna preach to us.}} | {{L|Incidental 7|Oh, so now the talking cheese is gonna preach to us.}} | ||
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{{L|''[Every band member gets into a fight. Incidental 106 and Larry are yelling at each other. Incidental 13 slams a drum on Incidental 106. Squidward tries to settle the fight in a semi-worried tone.]''}} | {{L|''[Every band member gets into a fight. Incidental 106 and Larry are yelling at each other. Incidental 13 slams a drum on Incidental 106. Squidward tries to settle the fight in a semi-worried tone.]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|There's a deposit on that equipment, people!}} | {{L|Squidward|There's a deposit on that equipment, people!}} | ||
{{L|''[Every band member uses their instruments as weapons. Mr. Krabs and | {{L|''[Every band member uses their instruments as weapons. Mr. Krabs and Harold charge at each other with large woodwinds, but try to screech to a halt, and Mrs. Puff slams them both with her cymbals]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Settle down, please!}} | {{L|Squidward|Settle down, please!}} | ||
{{L|''[Sandy and Incidental 42 are fighting. Sandy breaks the xylophone keys from Incidental 42 and Incidental 42 runs away. Patrick kicks Sandy, who growls at him before producing a trumpet with an evil grin. Patrick realizes what's coming and runs away screaming as Sandy chases him with the trumpet. The scene cuts to the clock which shows it being 10 o'clock and everyone stops fighting.]''}} | {{L|''[Sandy and Incidental 42 are fighting. Sandy breaks the xylophone keys from Incidental 42 and Incidental 42 runs away. Patrick kicks Sandy, who growls at him before producing a trumpet with an evil grin. Patrick realizes what's coming and runs away screaming as Sandy chases him with the trumpet. The scene cuts to the clock which shows it being 10 o'clock and everyone stops fighting.]''}} | ||
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{{L|Patrick|You're welcome.}} | {{L|Patrick|You're welcome.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|What kind of monsters are we? That poor creature came to us in his hour of need, and we failed him. Squidward's always been there for us when it was convenient for him. Evelyn, when your little Jimmy was trapped in a fire, who rescued him?}} | {{L|SpongeBob|What kind of monsters are we? That poor creature came to us in his hour of need, and we failed him. Squidward's always been there for us when it was convenient for him. Evelyn, when your little Jimmy was trapped in a fire, who rescued him?}} | ||
{{L| | {{L|Evelyn|A fireman.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|And Larry, when your heart gave out from all those tanning pills, who revived you?}} | {{L|SpongeBob|And Larry, when your heart gave out from all those tanning pills, who revived you?}} | ||
{{L|Larry|Some guy in an ambulance.}} | {{L|Larry|Some guy in an ambulance.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|Right. So, if we can all just pretend that Squidward was a fireman, or some guy in an ambulance, then I'm sure that we can all pull together and discover what it truly means to be in a marching band.}} | {{L|SpongeBob|Right. So, if we can all just pretend that Squidward was a fireman, or some guy in an ambulance, then I'm sure that we can all pull together and discover what it truly means to be in a marching band.}} | ||
{{L| | {{L|Harold|Yeah, for the fireman!}} | ||
{{L|All|Hooray!}} | {{L|All|Hooray!}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|Now let's make Squidward proud. A 1, a 2, a skiddly diddly doo.}} | {{L|SpongeBob|Now let's make Squidward proud. A 1, a 2, a skiddly diddly doo.}} | ||
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{{L|Squidward|''[nervously]'' Okay, everybody. ''[glances at Squilliam, who grins, chuckles and bounces his unibrow]'' Let's get this over with. 1, 2, 3, 4...}} | {{L|Squidward|''[nervously]'' Okay, everybody. ''[glances at Squilliam, who grins, chuckles and bounces his unibrow]'' Let's get this over with. 1, 2, 3, 4...}} | ||
{{L|''[The band starts to play a wonderful intro fanfare. Squidward opens his eyes, shocked. Plankton plays the opening notes of the song. SpongeBob begins singing.]''}} | {{L|''[The band starts to play a wonderful intro fanfare. Squidward opens his eyes, shocked. Plankton plays the opening notes of the song. SpongeBob begins singing.]''}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|''[voice of David Glen Eisley]'' ♪The winner takes all, it's the thrill of one more kill. The last one to fall will never sacrifice their will. Don't ever look back on the world | {{L|SpongeBob|''[voice of David Glen Eisley]'' ♪The winner takes all, it's the thrill of one more kill. The last one to fall will never sacrifice their will. Don't ever look back on the world closin’ in. Be on the attack with your wings on the wind. Oh, the games will begin.♪ ''[Squilliam stares in shock, Squidward gives him a smug grin and throws his baton over his shoulder and uses his arms for conducting.]'' ♪And it's sweet, sweet, sweet victory, yeah. And it's ours for the taking, it's ours for the fight,♪ ''[Squilliam has a heart attack while he faints and gets carried away by stretchers. Squidward waves a smug goodbye to him and runs to the middle of the stage.]'' ♪And it's sweet, sweet, sweet victory, yeah. And the one who's last to fall. Sweet, sweet victory...♪♪}}</font> | ||
{{L|''[Squidward jumps up and the scene freezes. It then fades to black, ending the episode.]''}} | {{L|''[Squidward jumps up and the scene freezes. It then fades to black, ending the episode.]''}} | ||
[[Category:Transcripts]] | [[Category:Transcripts]] | ||
Revision as of 18:39, 7 April 2023
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