A Finful of Sand Dollars/transcript

This article is a transcript of the Kamp Koral: SpongeBob's Under Years episode "A Finful of Sand Dollars/transcript" from season , which aired on .

• [The episode opens at the Krusty Kanteen. SpongeBob, Patrick, Kevin, and Squidward are at a table. Microphone feedback is heard as it startles them.]
• Sandy: [through watchtower loudspeaker] Yee-haw!
• SpongeBob: Huh?
• Sandy: Howdy, howdy, campers. I'm proud to announce today is the first ever Kamp Korral Wild West Day! We're all gonna dress like cowboys and a full day o' western fun!
• Campers: [cheering]
• Sandy: So, let me hear ya say, yee-haw! [takes off hat and swings it]
• All: Yee-haw!
• Patrick: Hooray!
• Squidward: Hm.
• Mr. Krabs: [takes the microphone] And for you wannabe buckaroos, I have a one for the price of two Western wear [puts on cowboy hat] sale happening at the general store!
• Campers: [cheering while taking out their money and walking away]
• Camper: One for the price of two!
• [Bubble transition to a saloon door, where Patrick opens it. He is standing on SpongeBob, and they are both wearing Western outfits. The door shuts on them, and catches SpongeBob's nose. Campers are seen at the tables, some playing cards, and some cheering. One camper is passed out on the table. Plankton lands on the root beer dispenser to dispense it into a mug.]
• Camper: [blows away the foam and chugs the root beer]
• Plankton: [has bubbles on his face that resemble a beard and mustache]
• [Someone is playing piano as another camper chews on a piece of rye.]
• Kidferatu: [hisses]
• Piano player: [stops playing, whimpering] Ooh.
• Preda: [lands on top of the piano] Excuse me, amigo. But why don't you let Feratu the kid play piano? [the green camper runs away] He actually has fingers.
• Piano player: [screams as Kidferatu cracks his knuckles in front of him]
• Kidferatu: [starts playing horror music]
• Campers: [confused] Huh?
• Kidferatu: [hisses, laughs, then starts playing Western music]
• Orange camper: [playing cards with Bubble Bass] You got any deuces?
• Bubble Bass: Go fish.
• Orange cmper: [a hook comes by and hooks him up] Whoa!
• Green camper: [draws facial hair on his chin with a black marker, and puts on an eyepatch] Now who you callin' ugly?
• Other camper: Huh?
• Orange camper: [lowers back down to Bubble Bass] I'm callin' you a low-down, yellow belly, [points] cheater!
• Bubble Bass: And I say [points] you're just a sore loser! [his hat falls onto the table to reveal cards inside]
• Orange camper: What? [slaps hat away] Smile, sidewanderer. [aims a peashooter at Bubble Bass]
• Bubble Bass: [gasps, grunts as he puts a pea in his straw, then swings it around and aims it]
• Campers: [run to see Bubble Bass and the orange camper, gasp]
• Orange camper and Bubble Bass: [each glare at each other, then inhale, but not before their straws are slapped away by a paddle] Huh?
• Bubble Bass: [off-screen, gasps upon seeing Sandy with a paddleball on a seahorse] Sheriff Sandy.
• Sandy: [dismounts the horse] Lookie here. I run a clean town, so let's keep it friendly boys, or y'all will have to spend a night in the [points away] hoosegow.
• Girl: [holding in her bladder with another girl in front of the "jail" outhouse] Will someone arrest me? I need to use the jail.
• Squidward: [inside the jail, plays harmonica] This jail stinks. [holds nose] Literally.
• Narlene: [pushes grass away to look at the camp] Well, looks like there's a new sheriff in these parts, Nobby. Whoo-hoo! I reckon this'd be a good time to reach into our saddle bag of tricks and crank this one-horse town. Huh?
• Nobby: [rapidly nods]
• Narlene: Time to rustle up some fun. [both go back into the grass]
• [Bubble transition to the campers watching Sandy use a lasso in an enclosed fence.]
• Campers: [cheering]
• Sandy: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah! [extends her lasso and jumps in the hole] Whoop! Whoop, whoop, whoop! [turns her lasso into a Texas shape] Whoop, [lassos her hat to launch it in the air, then fall back on her head] whoop, whoop! Whoo!
• Campers: [cheering]
• Sandy: [points to the stable doors, which SpongeBob and Patrick are holding shut] Release the broncos!
• Anchovies: [meeping as they are released into the area, then get lassoed by Sandy and tied by their legs]
• SpongeBob: [stops stopwatch] Wow! Four seconds.
• Campers: [cheering]
• Nobby: [appears, gibbering]
• Sandy: What's that? Trouble at the old mine? Lead the way!
• Nobby: [gibbering while running away as Sandy follows]
• SpongeBob: Wow! [gets hit with a pea and falls over] Whoa!
• Nalene: [twirls peashooter] Ha-ha-ha! [gets up] I'm Narlene the Bandit Queen, and this here's a Western-style hold up. [holds a sack in front of SpongeBob and Patrick] Empty your pockets and such. Put all your candy in this sack.
• SpongeBob and Patrick: [nervous, put all their candy in the sack]
• Narlene: [sticks her arm into one of SpongeBob's holes] I know you're hidin' more candy in those holes, SpongeVarmit.
• SpongeBob: [laughs] Hey, that tickles.
• Narlene: [pulls out a Jack-o'lantern bucket with candy] Hoo-whee! Trick or treat! Thank you kindly, stranger. [walks away] Hoo-hoo!
• SpongeBob: [tries to run forward, but gets hit with more projectiles and falls down] Whoa!
• Patrick: [pats belly] Well, she didn't check every hole. [candy is in his belly button]
• [Cowboy hat transition to Nobby, who is followed by Sandy.]
• Sandy: [stops] Hold your horses. I don't remember any old mines around here.
• [Silence.]
• Nobby: Uh, here you go. [hands Sandy a string, ties her up, and puts her on a train track, then laughs as he runs away]
• Sandy: [struggles to move as a train horn is heard]
• Nobby: [blowing whistle, laughs, then runs away]
• Sandy: I can't believe I fell for the ol' trouble at the mine bit.
• [Cowboy boots fly across the screen as it transitions to Mr. Krabs reading the newspaper in the general store. Several shots are fired at the newspaper, and it rips apart. Narlene enters the store.]
• Mr. Krabs: [holding his claws up] All right, you got the drop on me. What do you want there, Clamity Jane?
• Narlene: You can call me Narlene the Bandit Queen, [points to the gumball machine] and I want the combination to that there gumball machine.
• Mr. Krabs: Never!
• Narlene: Okay. Have it your way. [whistles with her fingers, summoning Nobby, who is holding a horse's head on a stick]
• Nobby: [tosses the horse head on a stick away and hits the gumball machine with a hammer, then uses a saw on it, then a blowtorch, then a baseball bat, a jackhammer, ax, and finally a stick of dynamite, which successfully blows it up]
• All: [coughing]
• Narlene: Think you used enough dynamite there, Nobby? Now we got no [picks up a burnt gumball] gum, dadgumit! [gumball disintegrates]
• Nobby: [giggles and shrugs]
• Narlene: [disappointed] Well, guess we oughta be escapin' now. [escapes from the store while riding Nobby]
• Mr. Krabs: [calling] Somebody get the sheriff! [trips on a gumball and falls down] Whoa!
• Squidward: [plays the harmonica while sitting on a barrel]
• [Bubble transition back to Sandy on the train tracks.]
• Sandy: [train horn blows] Well, I'm gonna need an old Western trope to get outta this old Western rope. [whistles, getting the attention of a seahorse drinking water, who runs to Sandy; holds up a bottle of horse radish, which she squirts onto her rope, giggles]
• Seahorse: [whinnies, then sniffs and eats the horse radish]
• Sandy: Good girl, Snowball. [breaks free from the rope, mounts Snowball, and moves out of the way just before the train comes by] Whoo! Thank goodness the 3:10 was runnin' late.
• Snowball: [neighs, then runs off]
• [Bubble transition to Narlene and Nobby entering the Krusty Kanteen saloon.]
• Campers: [gasp]
• Camper: [screams and runs off]
• Narlene and Nobby: [chuckle, then get hit by the saloon doors closing on them, then they open the doors again]
• Narlene: Lousy door.
• Campers: [murmuring as Narlene and Nobby walk past them]
• Kidferatu: [plays Western music on the piano again]
• Two campers: [scream and run away as Narlene and Nobby approach the canteen]
• Plankton: Huh?
• Narlene: [hits away a can] Milk.
• Plankton: [instantly puts two milk glasses on the counter]
• Narlene: [hits away the glasses, breaking them] Give me the bottle.
• Plankton: [puts two baby bottles of milk on the counter]
• Narlene and Nobby: [take the bottles and drink them like babies, then spit out the milk]
• Squidward: [playing the harmonica]
• Narlene: [she and Nobby toss away their bottles, then points at Squidward] Enough with the moody harmonica music! [holds up a straw] It's time to dance. [shoots peas at Squidward]
• Squidward: Huh? [moves his limbs to dodge the peas, as well as dances]
• SpongeBob and Patrick: [appear next to Squidward, dancing]
• SpongeBob: Hee-hoo! That there Squidward is the fastest pirouette in the West.
• Narlene: You think that's good dancin'? Then why don't everybody dance? [she and Nobby shoot peas at everyone]
• Camper: [as he and another camper holding trays move their feet to dodge] Oh!
• Elwood: [moving backwards, falls over and drops his food tray onto himself]
• Kidferatu: [his hat is shot off as he continues playing the piano, then notices and starts burning in the sun as he hisses and turns into ash]
• Preda: [continues playing the piano]
• Campers: [scream as peas continue to be shot, then start square dancing]
• Mr. Krabs: [square dancing as well] What in the barnacles is goin' on here? [peas are shot at him, creating a pea splatter shape around him on the wall behind him]
• Narlene and Nobby: [approach the camera as the scene fades to a deed that reads "I hereby relinquish all property rights to Kamp Koral To: Narlene & Nobby," which Mr. Krabs holds a feather pen up to] Sign this camp over to me, ya grass-bellied sidewander, or I'll fill ya full of peas.
• Mr. Krabs: [screams like a woman] Not peas. They're so mushy. [cries, then is about to signs his name before it is hit away by a paddleball]
• Sandy: Not so fast. [holding the paddle] Nobody steals my town, in my town. [points to Narlene] I'm calling you out, straw slinger. You and me, in the street.
• Narlene: You're on.
• Nobby: Yeah!
• [The scene changes to two circling jellyfish in the sky. The camera pans down to ground level, where a camper runs away as Sandy slowly steps forward.]
• Camper: [runs into a cabin and dives inside] Whoa! [whimpering as Sandy walks past]
• [Another camper emerges from a barrel. Narlene is seen on the other side also walking forward, and she and Sandy glare at each other from a distance. They grunt at each other, then harmonica playing can be heard.]
• Sandy and Narlene: Huh?
• Squidward: [walks forward with a rope tied to a case] If you don't like my harmonica music, [pulls the rope to move the case to his other side, then opens it and takes out his clarinet] You're gonna hate my clarinet playing. [puts several straws into his clarinet like a revolver]
• Nobby: [appears beside Narlene, emerging from his hat]
• [The screen turns sepia and black bars appear on the top and bottom. Everyone looks at each other, everyone starts sweating, and Nobby gibbers then starts glaring as well.]
• Squidward: Hm.
• Sandy: [turns into a realistic squirrel and makes squirrel noises]
• Narlene: [grabs her straw, then two straws are aimed at her] Huh?
• Nobby: Huh?
• [Bubble Bass and Mr. Krabs have their straws aimed at Narlene. They take off the black bars and toss them away as the sepia filter fades away. Several campers aim their straws at Narlene, then SpongeBob swallows several straws and loads them. Patrick aims a straw with his butt. Narlene looks frightened. A foghorn alarm goes off, and Squidward shoots his revolver clarinet.]
• SpongeBob: [laughs and runs in a circle, shooting peas everywhere and hitting several campers]
• Kevin: [gets shot in the chest and screams, then falls down into a trough of water]
• [Harvey gets shot as well. Squidward continues shooting peas and falls over. The peas knock over Bubble Bass and Mr. Krabs. Narlene shoots a pea.]
• Sandy: [flinging her paddleball] Hi-yah! [the pea gets destroyed by the paddleball]
• Narlene: Huh? Dagnabbit!
• Patrick: [shoots a pea from his butt]
• Nobby: [tries to shoot, but gets knocked over by the pea]
• Sandy: [tries to hit Narlene with the paddleball]
• Narlene: [grabs the paddleball string and a pair of scissors, and cuts the ball off, then pulls Sandy next to her]
• Sandy: [groans, lying on the ground]
• Narlene: [twirling her straw] Say your prayers, Sheriff. [aims her straw]
• Anchovies: [meeping in a fenced area]
• Sandy: [whistles to summon Snowball holding a rope, who lassos the doors open to release the anchovies]
• Anchovies: [meeping and stampeding ahead, running into Narlene and Nobby and creating a dust cloud]
• Narlene: [raising her fist in the air as she and Nobby get carried away] You ain't seen the last of us! By my troth, we shall return for Medieval Day!
• SpongeBob: Let's hear it for Sheriff Sandy! Hip-hip!
• All except SpongeBob and Sandy: Hooray!
• Sandy: [on Snowball] Let's all head to the canteen for a shot o' milk. I'm buyin'. [clicks, then rides forward as everyone else follows]
• Campers: [cheering]
• Sandy: [aims a firey metal "KK" logo at the camera] Yee-haw!