Don't Make Me Laugh/transcript

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This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "Don't Make Me Laugh" from season 14, which aired on February 12, 2024.

[At the Reef Theater, SpongeBob and Patrick approach the snack booth.]

SpongeBob: I love going to the movies. The sticky floors that make me feel grounded.

Patrick: I can't wait for you to see this movie, SpongeBob. It's the funniest thing I've never seen in your life. There's this one part where this guy... [laughs]

SpongeBob: Two combos, please.

Patrick: ...is wearing a hat. [laughs]

SpongeBob: No spoilers, Patrick.

[Their feet stick to the floor as SpongeBob and Patrick find their seats.]

SpongeBob: Prudence in Love? That doesn't sound funny. Patrick, are you sure we're in the right theater?

Patrick: [laughs] Shh!

[Black and white footage shows a Victorian man and women.]

Nathaniel: I love you Prudence.

Prudence: And I love you Nathaniel.

Nathaniel: But I love you more, Prudence.

Prudence: Then I love you slightly more then that, Nathaniel.

Nathaniel: It's not a competition, Prudence.

Prudence: But if it were, I'd be winning.

[Back to SpongeBob and Patrick.]

SpongeBob: Aw, this is so sweet. [whispers] But it's not funny.

[Patrick laughs.]

SpongeBob: But your laughter is so infectious.

[SpongeBob starts laughing with Patrick.]

[Everyone in the theater glares at SpongeBob and Patrick.]

French Narrator: And just then, all the years of excessive laughing finally took their toll, and SpongeBob's funny bone got stuck in high gear.

[SpongeBob continues laughing.]

Patrick: It's not that funny, SpongeBob.

[The actors glare onscreen.]

Prudence: Hey, what are you laughing at? This is a melodrama, not a comedy.

Nathaniel: Yes! Take a hike, Chuckles.

[Everyone in the theater boos at SpongeBob.]

Patrick: Can you believe this guy, laughing all thorough the movie like that?

Usher: Who is making all that noise?

[A flashlight shines at SpongeBob.]

Usher: All right, laughing boy, take your hardy har hars outside!

[The audience starts cheering.]

[The usher kicks SpongeBob out of the theater. He lands in a dumpster, then emerges while still laughing.]

SpongeBob: Huh? Uh-oh. Why can't-- Why can't I stop laughing?