Barnacle Face/transcript

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(She screams again. The whole Bikini Bottom town is looking at her again)

(Bubble translation to the Krusty Krab)

(SpongeBob appears to be whistling while mopping the floors)

Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob? (SpongeBob stops)

SpongeBob: Yes Mr Krabs?.

Mr. Krabs: Didn't you already mop this area?.

SpongeBob: (Small laugh). Affirmative Captain!.

Mr. Krabs: Well then why would you mop it again?.

SpongeBob: Why woudn't I?.

(Pause)

Mr. Krabs: Good Point.

(Pearl enters in tears)

Mr. Krabs: Pearl, What brings you in on such a fine afternoon?.

Pearl: (Crying) Oh Daddy! It's terrible. The school dance is this weekend.

Mr. Krabs; Oooh that is terrible. (Shivers) Makes my shell crawl just thinking about it. Bleugh!.

Pearl: No daddy. Don't you understand!?. The terrible part is that I can't go to the dance (Mr Krabs comes closer).

Mr. Krabs: Why ever not?

Pearl: Because I have a hideous Barnacle growning on THE SIDE OF MY FACE!.

Mr. Krabs: Ohohohoh. Now calm down there my little Pearl. I'm sure it can't be half as awful as you...(Screams as a drop of somethig comes off Barnacle) GREAT RUSTY HICHFIT OF DAVY JONES LOCKER!!

Pearl: WE HAVE TO GET RID OF IT NO MATTER WHAT IT TAKES!.

Mr. Krabs: Anything for me beloved Angel.

Pearl: Oh..Ok. I need an appointment with a Germatologist, A trip to the Spa. Expensive creams and lotions. And probably some other kind of...

(Krabs stops her angry).

Mr. Krabs: I meant whatever you need to get rid of your Blemish NOT LIQUIDATE ME RETIREMENT FUND!.

(Pearl cries again)

(Harold and Nat Peterson are eating luch on a table full of tears)

Harold: You know what?. Let's go across the street to the Chum Bucket.

Nat: I heard they have better weather over there.

(They leave the Krusty Krab. Mr Krabs chases after them but fails). Mr Krabs: NO!. WAIT!. (Pearl is still crying). This is starting to eat away me Profit Budgering (This is what i heard so it may not be the exact line). If i don't come up with a solution fast it's gonna cost me more than a couple cases of cold cream. (He notices SpongeBob mopping past him).

SpongeBob: Lalalalalalalalalalalla!.

Mr. Krabs: Oh SpongeBob. (SpongeBob salutes him). How would you like to.....(He raises his right hand) Adees (Again this is what I heard), (SpongeBob salutes again). How would you like to do your dear old chum a favor and raid this beautiful daughter of her evil barnacle?

SpongeBob: I will do you this favor sir chum,never fear!

(bubble transition to Pearl walking with SpongeBob) Pearl: I don't know, SpongeBob. The school dance is right around the corner and this barnacle seems to get bigger by a minute!

SpongeBob: Don't fear, Pearl. We'll get rid of this barnacle in no time! I know just what to do!

Pearl: Are you sure?

SpongeBob: One time, my friend Patrick had this barnacle the size of an extra large Krabby Patty right at the center of his forehead! Anyway, I fixed it, so we never saw that barnacle again!

Pearl: How?

SpongeBob: I took him to see a hypnotist.

Pearl: You took Patrick to a hypnotist?

SpongeBob: No. The barnacle. It became convinced it was a pelican and flew south for the winter. We never saw that pelican again!

Pearl: I thought you said it was a barnacle.

SpongeBob: What did I say?

Pearl: Pelican.

SpongeBob: (pauses for a second) He was a really good hypnotist.

(bubble transition inside the bathroom)

Unfinished.