Big Pink Loser/transcript

Narrator: Ah, bikini bottom. (Patrick yans, then, the mail fish puts the package in) Patrick: A reward? I never gotten an award before! Hey, rock, I got an award! Patrick: Hey, jellyfish, I got an award! (Jellyfish sting patrick) Patrick: World, I got an award... (Patrick gasps for water) Patrick: I gotta show spongebob! Spongebob: Hold still, gary. Gary: Meow. Spongebob: Almost done. (Spongebob screams as patrick opens the door) Patrick: Spongebob, I got an award! Spongebob: (Spongebob falls down) Wow, great, patrick. Patrick: Read it! Spongebob: For doing great things and stuff, spongebob squarepants? Patrick: Well, that's a funny way to spell my name. Spongebob: Patrick, I think that trophy is for me. Patrick: But, it's shiny. Spongebob: And you know what else is shiny? Patrick: Ice cream! It's here! Spongebob: Patrick, that's my... Award closet. Patrick: I want an award! Spongebob: Patrick, don't cry. (Patrick cries) Patrick: I can't get an award because I never done anything! Spongebob: But, you're patrick star. You can do whatever you want. Patrick: Well, I can't because you're spongebob. Spongebob: Patrick, if you think you're not smarter, what would you do? Patrick: Hmm... I want to defeat the giant monkey man and save the 9th deminton! Spongebob: Me too! But, that sounds a little hard. Why don't we start smaller? Patrick: I want to defeat the little monkey man and save the 8th deminton! Spongebob: Smaller. Patrick: Doctor. Spongebob: Smaller. Patrick: Fireman? Spongebob: The smallest you can think of! Patrick: A job at the krusty krab? Spongebob: Yeah! I do things at work all the time! Patrick: Then, let's go! Spongebob: Patrick, you need to do the job. Hi, squidward. I need you to hire this man. Squidward: And look who quit. Patrick: Do I get an award now? Spongebob: No, you have to work. Patrick: Tartar sauce. (Patrick gobbles it up) Patrick: Do I get an award now? Spongebob: No, you need to take it to the customer. (Patrick burps) Patrick: Do I get it now? Spongebob: No, now, this time, make sure it goes to the customer. (Patrick gobbles it up as the customer is about to eat it) Patrick: Do I get it now? Spongebob: No. Patrick: Barnacles! Spongebob: Let's do another task. Spongebob: You ring and listen whoever gives you a question. Woman #1: Is this the krusty krab? Patrick: No, this is patrick. Woman #2: Is this the krusty krab? Patrick: No, this is patrick. Man #1: Is this the krusty krab? Patrick: No, this is patrick! I'm not a krusty krab. Spongebob: Uhh, that's the name of the restuarent. Patrick: Ohhh, ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh... Fish paste! Spongebob: It's a little dusty, so, why don't you sweep up? Patrick: What's the point? I'll never get it right. Spongebob: You'll be fine. (Patrick squeaks) Customer: Hey, are you from stupidtown? Spongebob: Keep trying, patrick! Award man: I got a lot of awards for spongebob squarepants! Patrick: Grrrrrrrrrrr... Why can't I do anything right?!?! Uhhhh! Uhhh! Uhhh! Uhhh! Uhh! Uhh! (Customers cough) Patrick: (Patrick snarls) Spongebob: Kitchen. Patrick: I'm never getting an award now. Spongebob: Don't worry, patrick. Just get a jar. Patrick, that's a pickle. Patrick: I don't care. Spongebob: You need a jar. Nope. Nope. Nope. Try this.