Accidents Will Happen/transcript: Difference between revisions
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{{EpisodeTranscript}} | {{EpisodeTranscript}} | ||
{{L|''[Transitions to the Krusty Krab, which is surrounded by boats. In his office, Mr. Krabs is checking his money records. He hears shouting from outside.]''}} | {{L|''[Transitions to the Krusty Krab, which is surrounded by boats. In his office, Mr. Krabs is checking his money records. He hears shouting from outside.]''}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs| | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Hmm. Sounds like a mutiny. ''[he goes outside and gasps]'' What the...? ''[The restaurant is filled with customers shouting angrily]'' What in Neptune's knickers is this?! ''[A customer grabs him]''}} | ||
{{L|Frank (lifeguard)|Where's the dude in the boat, man? | {{L|Frank (lifeguard)|Where's the dude in the boat, man? Where's the dude in the boat?!}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Ooooh! You mean Mr. Squidward. ''[he turns and points]'' Well, he's at his post right over the... ''[the wooden boat is empty]'' Where's me cashier?! ''[He looks down at the Frank, who's still holding his arm. He glares at him, and pulls his arm away. Mr. Krabs bursts into the kitchen]'' SpongeBob! Where in Poseidon's pantyhose is that sorry excuse for a cashier?!}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Ooooh! You mean Mr. Squidward. ''[he turns and points]'' Well, he's at his post right over the... ''[the wooden boat is empty]'' Where's me cashier?! ''[He looks down at the Frank, who's still holding his arm. He glares at him, and pulls his arm away. Mr. Krabs bursts into the kitchen]'' SpongeBob! Where in Poseidon's pantyhose is that sorry excuse for a cashier?!}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|Sorry excuse for a cash- | {{L|SpongeBob|Sorry, excuse for a cash-- Ooh! You mean Squidward.}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|''[sighs]'' Yes. I mean Squidward. Where is he?!}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|''[sighs]'' Yes. I mean Squidward. Where is he?!}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|He's in the storage room. Says he's working on something requiring... ''[in a whisper]'' ...complete privacy.}} | {{L|SpongeBob|He's in the storage room. Says he's working on something requiring... ''[in a whisper]'' ...complete privacy.}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Ooh. He requires, ''privacy'' does he? ''[the sound of a chain snapping is heard, followed by a loud crash. SpongeBob and Mr. Krabs burst into the storage room]'' What's all the ruckus?! ''[A shelf has partially collapsed, and there are buns scattered in a heap all over the floor. Squidward emerges from the pile, rubbing his head and groaning. Mr. Krabs gasps]'' Oh no! Please, no! This is terrible! ''[ | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Ooh. He requires, ''privacy'' does he? ''[the sound of a chain snapping is heard, followed by a loud crash. SpongeBob and Mr. Krabs burst into the storage room]'' What's all the ruckus?! ''[A shelf has partially collapsed, and there are buns scattered in a heap all over the floor. Squidward emerges from the pile, rubbing his head and groaning. Mr. Krabs gasps]'' Oh no! Please, no! This is terrible! ''[bursts into tears]'' Are you hurt?}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Oh, well. Thank you for ask-}} | {{L|Squidward|Oh, well. Thank you for ask-}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|I wasn't talking to you! ''[ | {{L|Mr. Krabs|I wasn't talking to you! ''[picks up some of the buns]'' Don't worry, papa's here. ''[bursts into tears again]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Mr. Krabs? ''[Mr. Krabs continues | {{L|Squidward|Mr. Krabs? ''[Mr. Krabs continues crying]'' Mr. Krabs! ''[Mr. Krabs cries even louder]'' Mr. Krabs! ''[he stops crying]'' Your shelf collapsed on me and I twisted my ankle! ''[lifts up his tentacle, which is badly twisted]''}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|I didn't even know you had ankles.}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|I didn't even know you had ankles.}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|As if working here wasn't bad enough, now I've been injured on the job.}} | {{L|Squidward|As if working here wasn't bad enough, now I've been injured on the job.}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Injured? On the job? | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Injured? On the job? Oh, no! That would mean...}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|It's all right here, Mr. Krabs.''[Mr. Krabs turns and looks as SpongeBob moves some boxes aside to reveal a poster with "OWS" written on it]'' The Bikini Bottom OWS Worker Safety Guidelines. Let's see, it says here...blah blah | {{L|SpongeBob|It's all right here, Mr. Krabs. ''[Mr. Krabs turns and looks as SpongeBob moves some boxes aside to reveal a poster with "OWS" written on it]'' The Bikini Bottom OWS Worker Safety Guidelines. Let's see, it says here... Blah. blah, blah, blah, accident... Blah, blah, blah, blah, owner negligence... Blah, blah, blah, blah, substantial fines.}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Substantial fines?! ''[ | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Substantial fines?! ''[turns back to Squidward, laughing nervously]'' You know, Squidward... uh... I can't really let the OWS hear about this, you know. ''[laughs nervously. Squidward smirks]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Really? Maybe I should give them a call. ''[picks up a phone]''}} | {{L|Squidward|Really? Maybe I should give them a call. ''[picks up a phone]''}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Now now, Squidward! ''[laughs nervously]'' Let's not be hasty! ''[Squidward puts down the phone]'' I'll take care of your poor little ankle personally. ''[ | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Now, now, Squidward! ''[laughs nervously]'' Let's not be hasty! ''[Squidward puts down the phone]'' I'll take care of your poor little ankle personally. ''[turns around]'' SpongeBob! Squidward needs first aid! ''[SpongeBob looks delighted]''}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|First aid? Fear not, injured co-worker, ''[ | {{L|SpongeBob|First aid? Fear not, injured co-worker, ''[runs over to Squidward, now wearing a hospital hat and jacket and a stethoscope]'' for I am certified.}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Oh, no no no, don't touch me! ''[SpongeBob grabs Squidward's nose and runs his stethoscope over it]'' SpongeBob, would you mind letting go of my nose?}} | {{L|Squidward|Oh, no, no, no, don't touch me! ''[SpongeBob grabs Squidward's nose and runs his stethoscope over it]'' SpongeBob, would you mind letting go of my nose?}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|Oh, sure. ''[ | {{L|SpongeBob|Oh, sure. ''[lets go of Squidward's nose, and it flies back, hitting Squidward]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Ow! ''[ | {{L|Squidward|Ow! ''[takes the end of SpongeBob's stethoscope and shouts into the end of it]'' Get away from me! ''[SpongeBob shakes from the yell and hits his eardrums to make it stop]'' Well, this is it! I am reporting you to the OWS!}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|''[screams]'' Please don't report me to the OWS | {{L|Mr. Krabs|''[screams]'' Please don't report me to the OWS! I'll do anything, anything at all ya ask!}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Hmm? Anything? ''[cuts to scene where Mr. Krabs lays Squidward down]''}} | {{L|Squidward|Hmm? Anything? ''[cuts to scene where Mr. Krabs lays Squidward down]''}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Now if you want anything, just ask. ''[laughs nervously then walks away]''}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Now if you want anything, just ask. ''[laughs nervously then walks away]''}} | ||
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{{L|Mr. Krabs|''[angered]'' What did you say?}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|''[angered]'' What did you say?}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|I said, "fluff it."}} | {{L|Squidward|I said, "fluff it."}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|''[mocking tone]'' Fluff my pillow, I'll fluff | {{L|Mr. Krabs|''[mocking tone]'' Fluff my pillow, I'll fluff him. ''[angrily fluffs the pillow for Squidward]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|''[angered]'' What's that?}} | {{L|Squidward|''[angered]'' What's that?}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Oh, uh, I said, uh, will there be anything else, Mr. Squidward?}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Oh, uh, I said, uh, will there be anything else, Mr. Squidward?}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|''[relaxes on his pillow]'' No thanks. That should do it. ''[ | {{L|Squidward|''[relaxes on his pillow]'' No thanks. That should do it.}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|''[irritated tone]'' What can I do for you?}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Fine. ''[he walks away]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Oh, Krabsy!}} | |||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|''[chuckles, irritated tone]'' What can I do for you?}} | |||
{{L|Squidward|Just one more thing. I'm afraid you'll have to take over for me today.}} | {{L|Squidward|Just one more thing. I'm afraid you'll have to take over for me today.}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|What!? No!}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|What!? No!}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Oh, that's too bad. It looks like my twisted ankle | {{L|Squidward|Oh, that's too bad. It looks like my twisted ankle may become a 'permanent injury.'}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|''[cringes]'' Well, that would be an even bigger fine. You just sit back down and relax. We don't want you being injured any further. ''[chuckles nervously, then walks away]'' That was close. Well, at least the Krusty Krab isn't very busy today. ''[anchovies meep]'' Of course. ''[cuts to scene where SpongeBob holds a clipboard.]''}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|''[cringes]'' Well, that would be an even bigger fine. You just sit back down and relax. We don't want you being injured any further. ''[chuckles nervously, then walks away]'' That was close. Well, at least the Krusty Krab isn't very busy today. ''[anchovies meep]'' Of course. ''[cuts to scene where SpongeBob holds a clipboard.]''}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|Oh, Mr. Krabs, I have the OWS accident report form to fill out. Let's see, Question 1: Was the accident the result of criminal negligence? ''[Mr. Krabs screams]'' Mr. Krabs, what is criminal negligence?}} | {{L|SpongeBob|Oh, Mr. Krabs, I have the OWS accident report form to fill out. Let's see, Question 1: Was the accident the result of criminal negligence? ''[Mr. Krabs screams]'' Mr. Krabs, what is criminal negligence?}} | ||
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{{L|Mr. Krabs|Well, no, not exactly, what I mean is... ''[leans towards SpongeBob and whispers]'' I think Mr. Squidward is hiding something, and I want you to investigate.}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Well, no, not exactly, what I mean is... ''[leans towards SpongeBob and whispers]'' I think Mr. Squidward is hiding something, and I want you to investigate.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|Yes, sir, Mr. Krabs...}} | {{L|SpongeBob|Yes, sir, Mr. Krabs...}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Shhhh. ''[whispering]'' You gotta keep it a secret from Squidward. }} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Shhhh. ''[whispering]'' You gotta keep it a secret from Squidward.}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|Can do, Mr. Krabs.}} | {{L|SpongeBob|Can do, Mr. Krabs.}} | ||
{{L|''[Cuts to scene where SpongeBob tries to figure out the cause of the accident]''}} | {{L|''[Cuts to scene where SpongeBob tries to figure out the cause of the accident]''}} | ||
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{{L|Squidward|''[on phone]'' Hello, Office Workers Safety Department....''[Mr. Krabs jumps at Squidward ripping the phone out of his hand, then eats it.]''}} | {{L|Squidward|''[on phone]'' Hello, Office Workers Safety Department....''[Mr. Krabs jumps at Squidward ripping the phone out of his hand, then eats it.]''}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|''[chuckles nervously]'' I'll go get the massage oil now. ''[runs inside; cut to the storage room]'' Boy, ya got anything?}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|''[chuckles nervously]'' I'll go get the massage oil now. ''[runs inside; cut to the storage room]'' Boy, ya got anything?}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|Not yet, Mr. Krabs. ''[Mr. Krabs | {{L|SpongeBob|Not yet, Mr. Krabs. ''[Mr. Krabs groans; takes a bucket of fry grease]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|''[clearing throat]'' I'm waiting!}} | {{L|Squidward|''[clearing throat]'' I'm waiting!}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Coming!}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Coming!}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|This just isn't adding up.}} | {{L|SpongeBob|This just isn't adding up.}} | ||
{{L|Patrick|''[sits up]'' Pudding?}} | {{L|Patrick|''[sits up]'' Pudding?}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|We must be missing something. Patrick, we're | {{L|SpongeBob|We must be missing something. Patrick, we're gonna need help even more expert than you. ''[cut to inside the Krusty Krab, where Mr. Krabs massages Squidward's tentacles using the fry grease]''}} | ||
{{L| | {{L|Steve|Um, hello? Anybody here?}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|''[angered, muttering]'' Oh, for the love of peat moss.}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|''[angered, muttering]'' Oh, for the love of peat moss.}} | ||
{{L| | {{L|Steve|Anybody at all? Huh, maybe they're on their lunch bre-- ''[Mr. Krabs reaches into Steve's pocket, pulling out the money, walks into the kitchen to prepare a Krabby Patty, then comes out to present a Patty covered in fry grease]''}} | ||
{{L| | {{L|Steve|Um, aren't you gonna wash your... ''[Mr. Krabs shoves the greasy Krabby Patty into Steve's mouth; Steve groans in pain as he holds his stomach. Mr. Krabs returns to pampering Squidward by continuing to massage his tentacles]''}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|How long do I have to keep this up?}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|How long do I have to keep this up?}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Oh, it's | {{L|Squidward|Oh, it's going to be a long, slow recovery. Mm-hmm. Time to pop my back barnacles. ''[Mr. Krabs screams as Squidward's back barnacles are shown and then he cries. The customers mutter in anger]''}} | ||
{{L|OWS Manager|Office Workers Safety Department. I'm here to investigate the accident.}} | {{L|OWS Manager|Office Workers Safety Department. I'm here to investigate the accident.}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|''[gasps]'' Oh, no!}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|''[gasps]'' Oh, no!}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|''[sitting up]'' Oh, yes!}} | {{L|Squidward|''[sitting up]'' Oh, yes!}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Squidward, after all I've done for you, you | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Squidward, after all I've done for you, you called the OWS?!}} | ||
{{L|SpongeBob|He didn't call them, Mr. Krabs, we did. I needed help investigating the accident. Right, buddy?}} | {{L|SpongeBob|He didn't call them, Mr. Krabs, we did. I needed help investigating the accident. Right, buddy?}} | ||
{{L|Patrick|Uh, breakfast, green, Finland.}} | {{L|Patrick|Uh, breakfast, green, Finland.}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Well I, for one, plan to give him my full cooperation. ''[seen in a wheelchair with casts around his head, his arm, and one of his legs]'' Anything I can do, inspector? ''[smiles at Mr. Krabs, who fumes with anger; cuts to scene where they all investigate the accident]''}} | {{L|Squidward|Well I, for one, plan to give him my full cooperation. ''[seen in a wheelchair with casts around his head, his arm, and one of his legs]'' Anything I can do, inspector? ''[smiles at Mr. Krabs, who fumes with anger; cuts to scene where they all investigate the accident]''}} | ||
{{L|OWS Manager|So, this is where the accident occurred. Can anyone tell me what happened?}} | {{L|OWS Manager|So, this is where the accident occurred. Can anyone tell me what happened?}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|I'll be glad to... ''[in despair]'' I mean, I can | {{L|Squidward|I'll be glad to... ''[in despair]'' I mean, I can relive the whole tragic episode, if I must. ''[struggles to get up from the wheelchair]'' ''[flashback begins]'' It was just another day at the Krusty Krab. I was at the register, giving it a nice shining between orders, when something caught my eye; a patty bun with 10 seeds, instead of 11. I wasn't about to stand idly by and allow a customer go without all his guaranteed nutrients and vitamins. "I must replace it with a proper bun!", I said. I dashed into action.}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Excuse me, sir.}} | {{L|Squidward|Excuse me, sir.}} | ||
{{L| | {{L|Steve|What a diligent and charming individual.}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|That's when I entered the back room to grab a new bun. Just as I was about to reach for one, I heard a slight | {{L|Squidward|That's when I entered the back room to grab a new bun. Just as I was about to reach for one, I heard a slight creak. And that's when the chain snapped... and then, slam! My heroic and brave actions were halted by an unsafe shelf. Disoriented and in pain, I collapsed and lay for nearly six hours crying softly for help. ''[cries and then, flashback ends]'' The worst part, though, is... is that I never got that kind gentleman his new bun. ''[sniffles]''}} | ||
{{L|OWS Manager| | {{L|OWS Manager|Hmm, I see. As you know, certain penalties are involved...}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|Oh, no...}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Oh, no...}} | ||
{{L|OWS Manager|''[types in random numbers while Mr. Krabs cries]'' One... | {{L|OWS Manager|''[types in random numbers while Mr. Krabs cries]'' One... dollar.}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|''[gasps, blinking, wild | {{L|Mr. Krabs|''[gasps, blinking, wild crying, train bell dings]'' No...! Why?! Why, why?! Huh? ''[the scene zooms out to reveal a surveillance camera]'' What's this? Hold on a second. Me video surveillance camera!}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|''[shocked]'' What?!}} | {{L|Squidward|''[shocked]'' What?!}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|I forgot. I, uh, um, borrowed that from the airport. Now, let's see what really happened here. ''[ | {{L|Mr. Krabs|I forgot. I, uh, um, borrowed that from the airport. Now, let's see what really happened here. ''[comes back with the recording tape and the TV from the surveillance. Squidward is seen walking towards the bun shelf, but what he does is sleep on it. The chain immediately breaks and Squidward falls unharmed under the buns. Mr. Krabs gasps, then turns to Squidward furiously]'' You... faker! Not to mention you were sleeping on the job! ''[sighs deeply, forcing Squidward to the ground]''}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|What are you going to do to me?}} | {{L|Squidward|What are you going to do to me?}} | ||
{{L|Mr. Krabs|I'm gonna make you pay.}} | {{L|Mr. Krabs|''[growls]'' I'm gonna make you pay.}} | ||
{{L|Squidward|Oh, no! ''[cuts to scene where Krabs gets pampered. Krabs sighs. Squidward gasps. When Squidward starts to pop some of the barnacles on Mr. Krabs back, he screams in sorrow | {{L|Squidward|Oh, no! ''[cuts to scene where Mr. Krabs gets pampered. Mr. Krabs sighs. Squidward gasps after seeing the barnacles on Mr. Krabs' back. When Squidward starts to pop some of the barnacles on Mr. Krabs back, he screams in disgust and sorrow]''}} | ||
Latest revision as of 07:07, 23 July 2025
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