PL-1413/transcript

This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "PL-1413" from season 14, which aired on July 15, 2024.

• [The episode opens at the Bikini Bottom city hall. The mayor is giving a speech at a podium as a crowd listens. A time capsule is seen next to her.]
• Ms. Mayor: Thank you for attending today's time capsule ceremony. It's important that future generations know what made Bikini Bottom special, its citizens and their random personal belongings.
• Crowd: [cheering]
• Ms. Mayor: And now, please welcome [Sandy waves as she walks onstage] Miss Sandy Cheeks.
• Sandy: [taking the microphone] Thank you, Miss Mayor. I designed this metallic vessel to perfectly preserve anything inside for a very specific amount of time.
• SpongeBob: [emerging from the crowd, stepping on two people] How much time, Sandy?
• Sandy: [shrugging] Oh, I don't know, like, 2,000-ish years.
• Ms. Mayor: Let the ceremony begin.
• Crowd: [cheering]
• [The time capsule opens, and the Bikini Bottomites begin throwing their belongings inside. Scooter throws a trophy inside.]
• Lady: [kissing shoe before throwing it in] Mwah!
• SpongeBob: I just want to leave a happy message for the good people of tomorrow. [laughs inside the time capsule, leaving yellow smoke clouds]
• [Tom puts a book inside the capsule, and Patrick arrives while drinking a beverage.]
• Patrick: Ooh, what a fancy trash can. [tosses his beverage inside the capsule]
• [Another fish throws an envelope inside the capsule.]
• Squidward: [badly plays clarinet music, which causes the fish to take his clarinet] Hey, what are you doing with my clarinet?
• Fish: Making it [tosses the clarinet into the capsule] the future's problem.
• Squidward: [tries to dig up his clarinet but gets pushed out of the way by Mr. Krabs]
• Mr. Krabs: [with a Krabby Patty] Out of my way, Mr. Squidward. Customers of the future will pay top dollar for a vintage original Krabby Patty. [places the patty in the capsule; to Ms. Mayor] Can I charge for this now or do I have to wait?
• Ms. Mayor: And that concludes this momentous occasion. Thank you all so much for--
• Plankton: [off-screen] Not so fast!
• Crowd: [look behind and gasp]
• Plankton: [cackling while riding a miniature rocket, and jumps into the capsule]
• Crowd: [gasp]
• Plankton: You fools! With this patty in my grasp, I can finally take over the world! [cackles]
• Mr. Krabs: Yeah, [shuts time capsule] maybe later.
• Capsule: [displays text reading "2000 YEARS"] 2,000 years.
• Plankton: Huh?
• Mr. Krabs: Much later. [laughs]
• Plankton: [bangs on capsule window glass] Hey, let me out of here! I have to destroy you all. [SpongeBob's laughter gas circulates near Plankton] Huh? [covers ears] No! Oh, Neptune, no! [screams while looking out the window]
• Ms. Mayor: As I was saying, thanks for coming, everybody. [points with her fingers] Free pizza at city hall!
• Crowd: [cheering, running into the city hall]
• Mr. Krabs: Free! Free!
• Patrick: Oh! Pizza, pizza! Oh!
• Karen: [appears] What have you gotten yourself into this time, Sheldon?
• Plankton: [the time capsule begins to lower into the ground] Karen, get me a can opener or something, quick.
• Karen: Well, guess we have to wait until it opens up. [rolls off] I'll see you later.
• French Narrator: [narrating time card] 2,000 ish years later...
• [The clock on the time capsule beeps as it now reads "0000." The time capsule rises back up and opens its hatch, also releasing its contents and SpongeBob's laugh gas.]
• Plankton: [emerging from the pile] At last, [holding a singular patty molecule] after surviving on this patty one molecule at a time, I've finally cracked the secret formula. [insane laughter] Now my reign of terror can be--wait a minute.
• [Bikini Bottom is now entirely covered in chrome, and there are now flying cars.]
• Plankton: [hops down, walking around] This dump looks less dumpy. [looking at his reflection on a building] The future must be pretty great if everything's made of chrome, [pulls out a pair of socks] and slidey. [puts on the socks and starts sliding around on the ground] Whoo-hoo! Hey-ee. Mm, pretty. Ooh. [sees a building called "Chrome Bucket" in place of the Chum Bucket] What? The Chrome Bucket? Whoa. [runs into the building and pulls himself off] Where's the door? I can't take over the world if I can't even [jumps] get into my lab. [knocking] Karen, let me in!
• Future Karen: [phases through the Chrome Bucket as a chrome orb] Sheldon, welcome home.
• Plankton: Karen, is that you? I see you've had some work done.
• Future Karen: Uh-huh. And that's not the only work I've been doing.
• Plankton: Ooh. [rubbing hands] Have you completed some kind of deadly destructive robot?
• Future Karen: Negative. [displays an easel] I have been working on my art pieces. [sprays a gray background with two squiggly lines] I'm quite successful, in fact.
• [A couple appears.]
• Wife: Oh, honey, [pointing] this would match the couch in the living room.
• Husband: We'll [holds up chrome money] take it.
• Future Karen: [takes the money, then the couple walk off with the painting]
• Plankton: [shrugging] Who cares about art? [walks] Time to help me take over the world. Now, what happened to the front door? [waves arm] Ah, never mind. [uses a blowtorch on the Chrome Bucket while wearing a welding mask]
• Future Karen: You don't understand, Plankton. The whole world is different now.
• Plankton: [stops welding, lifts mask] Wait, what do you mean?
• Future Karen: Let me show you. [uses a beam of light to pick up Plankton]
• Plankton: Whoa!
• Future Karen: [showing Plankton a Museum of Squidward, where people are lined up to see his house] See? This is Squidward's old house.
• Plankton: Huh? Museum of Squidward? Who would ever go to a museum dedicated to that loser?
• Future Karen: Lots of people. [Squidward's clarinet playing is heard as the guard lets someone in] Squidward's old clarinet recordings are considered classical music now.
• Plankton: Wow. They weren't considered music at all before.
• Future Karen: [approacing a chrome sculpture of Squidward's head] Sadly, no one started listening to them until the day after he was gone.
• Squidward sculpture: Typical.
• [Future Karen turns around with Plankton. Chrome bubble transition to Future Karen and Plankton arriving at Patrick's chrome rock.]
• Future Karen: This is what Patrick's rock looks like [lets Plankton to the ground] now.
• Plankton: [faceplams] Ugh. [pointing] That moron was always an idiot. [Patrick's soda cup is seen attached to his butt] And his stupid soda cup left me sticky for [rips off the cup to reveal his bare rear end, raises fist] 2,000 years. [Patrick's rock slowly forms into a figure resembling Patrick] If he were here right now, I'd sock him right in his slack jaw. [notices Patrick] Eh--
• Future Karen: [off-screen] And this is the P-1000.
• P-1000: [eyes turn red] I'm hungry. I need a chrome snack. [scratches torso]
• Plankton: Even as a robot he's an idiot.
• P-1000: [head forms into vacuum to suck up Plankton] Food!
• Plankton: [gets sucked up] Whoa!
• P-1000: [eats Plankton and spits him out onto Future Karen] Ew! This doesn't taste like chrome. I'm going back to bed. [reforms into a chrome bed]
• Plankton: [groans and falls to the ground, then gets up, wiping hands] Now let me guess--next, you're going to show me what happened to SpongeBob.
• Future Karen: I wasn't, but if [carries Plankton over to Future SpongeBob's house] you insist. [uses Plankton to knock on the door]
• Future SpongeBob hologram: [wearing future shades and outfit; door raises, pointing] Hey, cats. How's it hanging? Thanks for stopping by, ya dig?
• Plankton: Wow, SpongeBob. I can't believe something here has actually improved, and that something was you.
• Future Karen: It's not SpongeBob. It's his holographic doorman.
• Plankton: [puts his hand through the hologram to see it is a hologram]
• Future SpongeBob: [a glass cube with a mouth on a wheel, laughing]
• Future Karen: This is the real SpongeBob, or at least what he's left of him.
• Future SpongeBob: [laughing]
• Future Karen: Aww, he likes you.
• Plankton: [screams, covering ears] Make it stop! I was haunted by the echoes of that laugh for 2,000 years. [falls down and gets chased by Future SpongeBob, screaming]
• Future SpongeBob: [laughing]
• Plankton: [tosses chrome coral to trip Future SpongeBob]
• Future SpongeBob: Whoops! [trips on the coral and falls over]
• Plankton: [stops and looks back] Huh?
• Future SpongeBob: [spinning while laughing on the ground, then begins making "voop" noises, then continues laughing again as Plankton runs away back to Future Karen]
• Plankton: Okay, I get it. The future is awful. But I know the secret [grabs Future Karen] formula now. We can take over [waving fist in the air] this horrible timeline.
• Future Karen: Um, about that. I think there's something else you should see.
• [Cut to Future Karen showing Plankton "The Kromey Krab," which displays a closed message with wooden boards.]
• Plankton: The Kromey Krab? [drops to the ground] "Permanently closed due to rust." This is great news!
• Future Karen: Ah, not exactly. [cut to her showing Plankton the chrome town] It doesn't matter if the Krusty Krab is open or not. [two fish synthesize Krabby Patties with the bulb on their heads] In the future, everyone knows the secret formula.
• Fish: [both take a bite into their patties]
• Plankton: They what? [holds arms to head, screams] No! [slumps] That's it! I've had it with the future! I just want to go back to all the people I hate. [crosses arms]
• Future Karen: Oh, why didn't you say so? I know someone who might be able to help.
• [Future Karen carries Plankton over to Sandy's treedome's entrance.]
• Plankton: [falls to the ground facefirst, then gets up] The screwy squirrel? Really?
• Future Karen: The squirrel didn't get trapped in a tube for 2,000 years, did she?
• Plankton: Touché, I guess. This is weird. Sandy's place looks exactly the same.
• Future Karen: Indeed, but be warned. Sandy may not be exactly how you remember her.
• Plankton: [scared] Uh-- [knocks on the entrance door, then jumps upon hearing Future Sandy]
• Future Sandy: [off-screen] Who dares to knock upon [entrance door opens] my dome?
• Plankton: [gulps and enters the treedome with a water helmet, looking around] Hello? Sandy? Are you in there?
• Kamp Koral Sandy: [grunts, then jumps into Plankton's view] Hey!
• Plankton: [screams]
• Kamp Koral Sandy: [salutes] Sandy Cheeks at your service, Mr. Plankton.
• Plankton: What the-- how did you get younger?
• Kamp Koral Sandy: Oh, I've just been jumping through the ages since summer ended at Kamp Koral.
• Plankton: Oh, just exploring space and time, huh? [fakes looking delighted] How wonderful. [jumps up to Kamp Koral Sandy's feet, begging] Please take me back to the present, please! [puts face to ground] I hate the future. I hate it!
• Kamp Koral Sandy: [giggles, holds out a remote] No need to beg, Mr. Plankton. I've been expecting you. The time hopper's all gassed up.
• Plankton: [jumps] Well, where is it?
• Kamp Koral Sandy: You're standing in it, partner. This here treedome [camera zooms out] is my reverse time capsule.
• Plankton: Then what are we waiting for? Away we go!
• Kamp Koral Sandy: [presses the button on her remote, and the treedome begins vibrating]
• Plankton: [waving] So long, Karen! See you 2,000 years ago. [the treedome and everything in it disappears]
• Future Karen: You can come out now, Plankton 2.0. [a much larger and muscular version of Plankton with hair emerges from a rock]
• Plankton 2.0: I thought he'd never leave. Now lay some [holds Future Karen] chrome on me, baby. [kissing Future Karen]
• Future Karen: [purrs, giggles]
• [Cut back in time to the Chum Bucket, where Sandy's treedome reappears nearby. The entrance door opens as Plankton and Kamp Koral Sandy walk out.]
• Plankton: [kisses the ground, then grabs some sand] I never thought I'd say this, but I missed this horrible place. Oh, and thank you for your help or whatever. [waves hand] Be gone now.
• Kamp Koral Sandy: Ain't you forgettin' somethin'?
• Plankton: [turns around] All right, all right. [pulls a dollar out from his wallet and gives it to Kamp Koral Sandy] Can you break a single?
• Kamp Koral Sandy: [giggles] I don't need a [pushes dollar away] tip, but I will need you to forget the secret formula. [pulls out a piece of pipe] Hold still while I activate my memory-erasin' device.
• Plankton: Your what?
• Kamp Koral Sandy: [hits Plankton with the pipe, making him faceplant; runs back inside the treedome, waving] See you back at camp, Mr. Plankton. [door shuts, treedome disappears]
• Plankton: [gets up and groans, walks] What happened? [walking on the road] How did I get here? [groans, rubs eye] Huh? Aha!
• [The same scene seen earlier in the episode of Mr. Krabs putting the patty in the time capsule is seen.]
• Mr. Krabs: Customers of the future will pay top dollar for a vintage original Krabby Patty. [places patty in capsule]
• Plankton: A Krabby Patty! Ho-ho-ho! [pulls out a remote and presses the button to summon a rocket] Now's my chance. Not so fast! [jumps into the capsule]
• Crowd: [gasps]
• Plankton: [cackles, points] You fools! Huh? Is anyone else having déjà vu?
• Mr. Krabs: See you in 2,000-ish [shuts time capsule hatch] years, Plankton. [laughs]
• Time capsule: [displaying "2000 YEARS"] 2,000 years.
• Plankton: [places face against capsule window] Huh? Uh-oh.