Delivery of Doom/transcript

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This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "Delivery of Doom" from season 15, which aired on June 6, 2025.

• [The episode opens with a frame of Sandals on an armchair with a TV near him. His stomach growls.]
• Sandals: Huh? Oh, I am so hungry, and incapable of doing anything for myself.
• Mr. Krabs: [pokes the glass from the TV out] You're in luck, my slovenly friend! While you sit there, wallowing in your filth, you can let the Krusty Krab make and deliver your meal for you! If your food isn't in your hands in 10 minutes or less, it's f-f-fr...
• SpongeBob: Psst, the line is "free."
• Mr. Krabs: Yeah, what he said.
• [SpongeBob gives the food to Sandals and Sandals tries to grab it. He eats it.]
• Sandals: Thank you, Krusty Krab!
• SpongeBob and Mr. Krabs: You're welcome!
• Mr. Krabs: Where's me money?
• [A title card saying "The Krusty Krab" with text saying "Call-KK-01KP" below it, appears. The screen transitions to the lair.]
• Realistic Fish Head: [off-screen] Little did they know, their Krusty commercial would reach the ignoble eyes of, the League of E.V.I.L!
• Dirty Bubble: Mmm, I love those greasy Krabby Patties!
• Jumbo Shrimp: Yeah, but I hate [slams the desk] paying for things!
• Helen the Felon: Well, if I don't get my afternoon snackies, I'm gonna throw a tantrum!
• [Sub-Marinara makes babbling noises.]
• Man Ray: You're right! This calls for a deliciously diabolical scheme! Whoop!
• [Man Ray pushes his chair to the phone.]
• Man Ray: We place our order with Krusty Krab, then use our powers of evil to ensure the delivery boy is late! Then we get a free lunch! [laughs evilly] Laugh with me, villains! Laugh!
• [Man Ray, Sub-Marinara, Dirty Bubble, and Jumbo Shrimp now laugh.]
• Man Ray: Shh, shh...
• Mr. Krabs: [speaking over telephone] Krusty Krab.
• Man Ray: Hello, I'd like five Krabby Combos, extra Krusty sauce-
• Helen the Felon: [whispering] Hey, [unintelligible speech]
• Man Ray: Oh, make that four, and a Pipsqueak Patty kids meal. Make it out to [speaks evilly] Man Ray... [speaks normally again] Deliver to League of E.V.I.L. secret hideout, ominous alley behind the gas station. Thank you!
• Mr Krabs: [speaking over telephone] No, thank you- [gets cut off when Man Ray hangs up the telephone]
• Man Ray: Villains... Battle stations!
• [The episode cuts to a shot of the Krusty Krab.]
• Realistic Fish Head: [off-screen] Meanwhile...
• [The episode cuts to a shot of SpongeBob and Mr. Krabs inside the Krusty Krab.]
• Mr. Krabs: Now remember SpongeBob... This delivery's gotta be quick, and you gotta put it directly in the customer's hand... [climbs the ladder to the Krusty Krab's roof] I ain't giving out no free meals.
• SpongeBob: Aye-aye, sir! Erm, but... [the scene changes to the Krusty Krab's roof when SpongeBob walks onto it] Do you think I will have time for the villains to sign my comic book?
• Mr. Krabs: Just get in the cannon.
• SpongeBob: [jumps into the cannon] Woosh!
• [Mr. Krabs pushes SpongeBob into the cannon.]
• Mr. Krabs: Pull! [He launches SpongeBob; Cut to the entrance to the lair. SpongeBob hits the sign.]
• Realistic Fish Head: [off-screen] Slam! [SpongeBob falls into the entrance.]
• SpongeBob: Wh, wh, huh? "Secret Entrance." Sounds villainous. [He opens the door.] This must be the place.
• [He goes into the entrance. He notices that there are spikes at the bottom.
• SpongeBob: Uh-oh. [He screams as he is falling down, and abruptly stops] Oh, wait a second!
• Realistic Fish Head: [off-screen] Picking quickly, SpongeBob reached for his hydrodynamic spatula with port and starboard attachments.
• [SpongeBob glides over the spikes and lands on the ground]
• SpongeBob: [Looks at his watch] Eight minutes to spare! This'll be a walk in the park. Whoop- I mean, cave. [laughs]
• [SpongeBob approaches a large door and knocks]
• Helen the Felon: Whaddaya want, bub?
• SpongeBob: Krusty delivery! Hey, I know you, you're-
• Realistic Fish Head: Helen the Felon! The troublemaking tyke!
• Helen the Felon: That's right! And I'm givin' you a timeout!
• SpongeBob: B-but I'm making a delivery, and Mr. Krabs says I have to put it right in your hand.
• Helen the Felon: Not my hand, Man Ray's hand! You're gonna have to open this door if you wanna get to him! [laughs evilly]
• SpongeBob: Okay! [he attempts to open the door but the doorknob keeps moving]
• Helen the Felon: [laughs as she controls the movement of the doorknob]
• [SpongeBob jumps up and grabs the doorknob, but it swings him around the cave eventually crashing him to ground]
• Helen the Felon: Give up the bag buddy boy! You'll never make it Man Ray on time! Never!
• SpongeBob: [Groans] To... weak... to... turn... knob... [gasps] I'll use my patty-flipping hand! [camera cuts to a close-up of SpongeBob realistic hand]
• [The doorknob screams as SpongeBob grabs it]
• Helen the Felon: Huh? No fair! That's cheatin!
• [SpongeBob twists the doorknob and falls through a trapdoor onto Helen. The two go tumbling down the stairs, and a doorknob lands on Helen's head]
• Realistic Fish Head: Concussed!
• SpongeBob: Ha ha, sorry about that. [pulls out his comic book and a pen] Say, can I get your autograph?
• Helen the Felon: [Dazed] Of course! [she messily signs her name before her head falls to the ground]
• SpongeBob: Gee, thanks! Six minutes to spare! [SpongeBob cheerily walks off with the delivery in his hands]
• [SpongeBob walks into a dark, stony chamber]
• SpongeBob: Krusty delivery!
• [The door slams shut behind him]
• SpongeBob: Hm?
• [A bell rings as a door opens to reveal Jumbo Shrimp]
• SpongeBob: [Gasps] I can't believe it. That's-
• Realistic Fish Head: Jumbo Shrimp! The biggest name in bad behavior!
• Jumbo Shrimp: And just where do you think you're going, small fry?
• [SpongeBob enters the ring with Jump Shrimp, frightened]
• SpongeBob: [whimpers] K-k-krusty delivery [gulps] for Man Ray.
• Jumbo Shrimp: If you wanna get to him, you'll have to go through me. [Screams]
• [Jumbo Shrimp runs toward SpongeBob]
• SpongeBob: No, please! ...Huh?
• [Jumbo Shrimp is revealed to be small, with SpongeBob holding him back with his finger]
• Realistic Fish Head: Puny!
• SpongeBob: [While Jumbo Shrimp is grunting in higher-pitched voice and swinging his fists] You look bigger in the comics. [Gives Jumbo Shrimp his comic book] You think you can sign this for me?
• Jumbo Shrimp: Oh, gladly! [Writes his name] So, uh, you're a fan?
• SpongeBob: Oh... huge... [laughs nervously]
• [Jumbo Shrimp goes back to trying to attack SpongeBob will being held back by his finger. SpongeBob detaches that arm from his body and walks off with a nervous smile.]
• Jumbo Shrimp: Wait! I'm not done with you, little guy! [Grabs SpongeBob's detached arms and points at him while standing on the top rope] Get back here! [He falls off the rope]
• SpongeBob: [Looks at his watch] Four minutes! Better hurry! [He exits the room and enters a clean kitchen-like room.]
• SpongeBob: Where am I? I... must have taken a wrong turn.
• [The room grows darker and the faucet stops flowing water and starts flowing a brown sludge. The Dirty Bubble emerges from the sink]
• Dirty Bubble: You certainly did you simple-minded sponge! Prepare to be ensnared by the Di-
• SpongeBob: The Dirty Bubble! [The lights abruptly turn on] Ooh, can I get your autograph? [SpongeBob pulls out his pen and walks toward the Dirty Bubble]
• Dirty Bubble: Ohh, no, wait! [SpongeBob pokes him with his pen] [weakly] Not again.
• Realistic Fish Head: Pop!