A Skin Wrinkle in Time/transcript
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This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "A Skin Wrinkle in Time" from season 13, which aired on January 13, 2023.
- [The episode opens with the French Narrator walking towards the screen in a wormhole.]
- French Narrator: Sometimes, a free phone comes at a very high price. And sometimes, the cheapskates are ones who get stuck with the bill, here in the Tidal Zone. [a payphone flies over to him as he picks it up] Allo. [it takes over as the French Narrator screams and drops over, but gets back up with his visor swirling as if he's hypnotized] Must give away one more story... A story of a grandpa adrift in space and time. A story of a sea star who is lost... In The Tidal Zone. [leaves as GrandPat starts hurtling towards the screen, screaming. A bunch of objects start to cross his path]
- GrandPat: Outta my way, you psychedelic space junk! [pushes a maraca and a pizza out of his way, then looks up to see a huge painting of Painty the Pirate] Sweet Neptune, have I found the beginning of the universe?
- Painty: Oooooooohhhhh...
- [GrandPat covers his ears as he gets closer to Painty, eventually going into his mouth. The scene changes to Bikini Atoll, where it transitions down to SpongeBob's house.]
- Painty: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
- [SpongeBob opens the door, still in his underwear.]
- Kids: GrandPat Sea Star!
- [GrandPat crushes SpongeBob and Hans gives him SpongeBob's pants.]
- GrandPat: Huh? [falls into a bathtub] Woah!
- Painty: Absorbent and yellow and porous is he.
- [GrandPat's skin falls off and his bones disintegrate in the bathtub.]
- Kids: GrandPat Sea Star!
- Painty: If nautical nonsense be something you wish.
- [Four GrandPats groan as they pull four banners that spell out "GrandPat Sea Star."]
- Kids: GrandPat Sea Star!
- Realistic Fish Head: Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish!
- Kids: GrandPat Sea Star!
- Painty: Ready?
- Kids and Painty: GrandPat Sea Star! GrandPat Sea Star! GrandPat Sea Star!
- [GrandPat mumbles as his body contorts until he's back to his sea star shape. He falls, screaming, onto some letters spelling out his name. His pants fall off and hop across the letters. His scooter then falls from above and pushes him down.]
- Painty: GrandPat Sea Star! [laughs]
- [GrandPat pulls out his dentures and they chatter the ending notes of the SpongeBob theme song. His dentures then bite his head.]
- GrandPat: Ow! I gotta get outta this nightmare! Huh? [notices the time closet] Oh! [drives into the time closet]
- [The shot changes to Dead Eye Gulch, where two cowboys are in a stand-off. One of the cowboys spits. Several hiding townsfolk spit and close their windows.]
- Cowboy #1: This town ain't big enough for the both of us.
- [GrandPat interrupts their stand-off by appearing through the time closet, grabbing a second cowboy and leaving with him once again.]
- Cowboy #1: [looks at a seahorse standing next to him] Uh... This town ain't big enough for the both of us.
- [GrandPat and Cowboy #2 begin drifting through the wormhole, coming across a baby version of GrandPat.]
- GrandPat: Ah, now that's a good-looking baby.
- [They continue going through the wormhole until they stop to meet a seahorse next to them.]
- Cowboy #2: Welp, this is my stop. See y'all later! [jumps on the seahorse and flies into the wormhole]
- GrandPat: Happy trails!
- [GrandPat then finally makes it back to his home timeline. He sits on the sofa and turns on the TV.]
- French Narrator: [on the TV] Bonjour.
- GrandPat: Ah... It's good to be back home, where it's normal.
- Patrick: [offscreen] Hey, GrandPat. [pan to reveal GrandPat's entire family have wings and eyes similar to flies] Whatcha watching?
- GrandPat: [screams, but then relaxes] Eh, close enough.
- French Narrator: And so, we leave things a little bit weird. But that's how we like it here, in The Tidal Zone. [his arm comes through the TV screen and turns it off] Au revoir.
- GrandPat: Hey! I was watching that!