Calling Some Monsters/transcript

This article is a transcript of the Kamp Koral: SpongeBob's Under Years episode "Calling Some Monsters/transcript" from season , which aired on .

Clam: [crowing on top of the rock monster]
Rock monster: [eats the clam]
[The camera moves forward to show the Trawler cabin. Jimmy is carrying food out of the cabin, and Kidferatu is trying to get some sunscreen from a bottle. Preda Tory drops her things from the roof, comes down from her web, and wraps it all in a web. Jimmy puts the food into a basket, shoves on the basket, and repeatedly jumps on it, getting slime all over it.]
Jimmy: [slips and slides on the goo, screaming]
Kidferatu: [rubs his arm, then squeezes the sunscreen bottle, which is empty; tosses away the bottle and uses Jimmy's slime on himself]
[SpongeBob and Patrick appear, wearing baseball gear.]
SpongeBob: Ahoy, Trawler cabin. You guys up for some baseball?
Jimmy: Actually, today we're going on a [air quotes] "monster outing."
SpongeBob: Ooh, like a monster picnic? That's [tosses equipment away] way better than baseball.
Patrick: I wanna be there now, please! [tosses equipment away, gasps]
SpongeBob and Patrick: [Patrick wraps his arm around SpongeBob] Can we go?
Preda: [comes down] So sorry, darlings. Monsters only.
SpongeBob: Aw. Well, we could be monsters, too.
[Cutesy close-up of SpongeBob and Patrick.]
Jimmy, Preda, and Kidferatu: [laugh]
Preda: Mutants, maybe, but never monsters.
Jimmy and Kidferatu: [laugh as they and Preda walk away]
SpongeBob and Patrick: [tear up]
SpongeBob: Oh, we gotta go to the monster picnic!
Patrick: Yeah, but how? We're not monsters.
SpongeBob: [gasps, grabs onto Patrick] But we were monsters once, Patrick. Remember Mr. Plankton's vending machine? The one with the cupcakes that turned us into monsters?
[Flashback to SpongeBob and Patrick eating cupcakes, then burping and turning into monsters.]
Patrick: Huh. It's not ringing a bell.
SpongeBob: [on Patrick's body] Come on, Patrick. [pointing] Let's get those cupcakes! [jumps off]
Patrick: [laughing and running in the other direction, crashes off-screen, then runs in the right direction]
[Bubble transition to the Krusty Kanteen, where campers are eating.]
Plankton: [serves a camper slop]
Camper: Uh, please, sir? May I have some less? [gets knocked out of the way by SpongeBob and Patrick, screams and crashes]
Plankton: [touches SpongeBob with his ladle] You'll need a tray if you want any of this slop.
SpongeBob: Oh, we don't want [nudges with elbow] slop. We want to order [eyes dart] off-menu. [winks]
Plankton: [shoves SpongeBob with his ladle] What are you two nincompoops talking about?
Patrick: We're talking cupcakes!
SpongeBob: The kind that turn you into monsters?
Plankton: Eh? [drops ladle] Uh, I don't know what you're talking about. [points] And I'll deny it in court! [pulls down the canteen door]
SpongeBob and Patrick: Aw. [walk away]
Karen: [peeking from the corner] Psst. Hey, boys. [points] Come here. [SpongeBob and Patrick approach her reading a newspaper] I heard you boys are looking for... [tosses newspaper] cupcakes.
Patrick: [clapping and laughing] Yeah, cupcakes!
Karen: Shh!
SpongeBob and Patrick: Shh!
Karen: [rolls away and comes back pushing the cupcake vending machine] Mr. Plankton must've forgotten, because we have a whole bunch.
SpongeBob and Patrick: Oh, boy!
Karen: Here, have some. [pushes the vending machine to fall onto SpongeBob and Patrick]
SpongeBob and Patrick: [eating cupcakes, burp, turn into monsters, then jump out]
SpongeBob: Patrick, we're monsters again!
Patrick: Let's picnic!
SpongeBob and Patrick: [cheering and dancing, laugh and run off]
Karen: [waving] Okay, you have fun now.
[Bubble transition to SpongeBob and Patrick knocking over a coral tree and standing on it. They excitedly run and stomp, making the vegetation jump up and down with the stomps.]
Patrick: [lifts and throws a rock]
SpongeBob: [laughs and gets crushed by the rock, then breaks out of it]
SpongeBob and Patrick: [enter a sea bear's cave and yell at it, scaring it away, then cheer; laugh and move along and spot the monster picnic]
Patrick: SpongeBob, [camera zooms out to show the monsters having a picnic] we found it! Whoa.
SpongeBob: Wow. [approaching] Hello. Got room for two more monsters?
Preda: [walking to them] Of course. Grab some seats.
SpongeBob and Patrick: [grab two seats and begin destroying them and fighting each other, howl then laugh] [stop and look confused] Huh?
[The monsters stare at SpongeBob and Patrick.]
SpongeBob: [he and Patrick look at each other, then at the monsters] What's wrong? I thought monsters loved to rampage.
Papa-Squatch: That's an outdated stereotype.
Preda: This isn't that kind of party. It's more of a support group.
[Pan over to the wise kraken talking near Kidferatu.]
Wise kraken: And those fishermen with their seafloor trolley. Last week, they tried to weight [grabs net with living room furniture] my new living room set.
Kidferatu: [hisses and nods]
Papa-Squatch: [trying to fit into a pair of jeans] I can't find jeans that fit me. [stretches the jeans to fit, which rip at the ankles]
Jimmy: Stores won't even let me try things out. They say I'm too [flaps arms, getting slime everywhere] moist. [slips on his chair and slides]
Monsters: [indistinct chattering]
Patrick: [sets up a chair and sits in it] Ugh, this is so boring.
SpongeBob: [sits on a folded chair, which sets it up]
Papa-Squatch: [pouring tea into some cups]
Patrick: [groans]
Papa Squatch: Hey, everybody. We're being rude. We haven't let the new guys talk about their monster problems yet.
Patrick: [he and SpongeBob take the cups] I thought monsters were cool, but snore. You are [throws cup] not.
Monsters: [talking amongst each other]
Papa-Squatch: I've never heard that before.
SpongeBob: What we're trying to say is, we've always thought monsters were awesome. And now we have the chance to be super duper in person. Maybe even me super duper with ya.
Patrick: Instead, we're drinking old lady tea.
Wise kraken: [holding a cup of tea while dunking a cookie in it] Hmm? What's wrong with old lady tea?
Rock monster: We? Awesome?
SpongeBob: Are you kiddin' me, rock monster? You are the coolest! [voiceover as the scene changes to a camper uses a pickax to climb a mountain] Master of disguise, no one ever sees you coming.
Camper: [sighs on top of the rock, then screams as the rock monster eats him]
Rock monster: [scene changes back] Ah, screams tickle mouth.
Patrick: [stroking the wise kraken] And you, kraken. You're legendary.
Wise kraken: [lifts Patrick in his hand] I am?
Patrick: [scene fades to a sea with a bunch of ships] Who else took on an entire army of ships by himself?
Wise kraken: [roars, hitting and destroying the ships, scene fades back to him in the present] Ah, good times.
SpongeBob: Just once, we'd like to be [the monsters all look at him] as cool as you guys are. To feel your monstrous [flexes muscles] power flow through our veins.
Patrick: To show pesky villagers who's [bangs fist] boss!
Monsters: [chattering in agreement]
SpongeBob: [sky turns dark] To lurk in the shadows.
[Scene changes to a scared camper in a dark cave.]
Camper: [whimpering]
Little Roxie: [giggles]
Camper: Huh?
Little Roxie: [screams, eyes turn red as she and Big Roxie scare the camper]
Camper: [yells and runs away]
[Scene changes to the camper scared in his bed.]
Patrick: [voiceover] And go bump in the night.
Camper: [door opens to reveal shadow of Preda, screams, then gets his mouth closed with a web, and yells as he is flung away]
[Scene changes to a camper shining his flashlight onto Papa-Squatch.]
SpongeBob: [voiceover] To waft through the forest.
Papa-Squatch: [eyes red, growls at the camper]
Camper: [screams, drops his flashlight, and runs away as he is chased by Papa-Squatch]
Patrick: [as SpongeBob howls on top of a rock] And howl so horrifically, that those who hear it can't help but turn savage. [howls with SpongeBob]
Kidferatu: [the moon reflects in his eye, which turns red after blinking, hisses]
Jimmy: [eyes red, roars]
Preda and Papa-Squatch: [eyes red, roar]
Monsters: [all eyes red] You're right! We are monsters! [all howl]
SpongeBob: Let's go get some villagers!
SpongeBob and Patrick: [howl]
[Just then, SpongeBob and Patrick turn back to normal.]
SpongeBob and Patrick: [still howling, SpongeBob stops, followed by Patrick]
Patrick: Uh-oh.
SpongeBob and Patrick: [yell]
Monsters: [laugh at SpongeBob and Patrick]
SpongeBob: [he and Patrick are fearfully holding onto each other] Patrick, I think we're the villagers now. [gets on top of Patrick, points] Run!
Patrick: [screams, running through some cacti as the monsters chase after them]
SpongeBob: [riding Patrick past the cabins] Monster attack! Monster attack! Monster attack!
[The cabin lights turn on, and Bubble Bass and another camper come out of their cabins.]
Bubble Bass: [wearing only underwear and a nightcap] Oh, please. They expect us to believe monsters are attacking the camp? [walks down the steps] Lamest prank ever. [gets on top of the rock monster surrounded by campers] Go back to bed, everyone. Clearly this is a jape. These idiots aren't fooling [the rock monster's eye turns red] anybody-- [gets eaten]
Campers: [scream and run away as the monsters chase them around camp]
Kidferatu: [hisses]
Wise kraken: [roars]
[The rock monster approaches the camera as the scene changes to a camper running into the outhouse and closing the door.]
Camper: [whimpers, yells as he spots Little Roxie] Oh.
Big Roxie: [roars from above, mouth wide open]
Camper: Uh? [screams as Roxie drops to attack him, runs out screaming with Roxie on his butt]
Anchovies: [meeping as they run into the Barge cabin to get away from Papa-Squatch, and hide in their metal can beds]
[The camera pans left on the hidden anchovies, and Kidferatu is seen with them.]
Kidferatu: [hisses]
Anchovies: Meep! [run out of the cabin meeping]
Kidferatu: [hisses while flying at the screen]
[Perch is in his watchtower watching the chaos.]
Perch: [groans, then screams as Papa-Squatch climbs the tower's ladder]
Papa-Squatch: [growling]
Perch: [climbs to the top of the tower as toy airplanes circle around the tower] Whoa!
Papa-Squatch: [tries to hit the airplanes]
[Harvey, Kevin, and Mo are using remote controls to move the toy airplanes. Their remotes get captured by webs.]
Mo: [screams]
Harvey and Kevin: Huh?
Preda, Roxie, and Kidferatu: [using the remotes to control the airplanes to hit Harvey, Kevin, and Mo]
Harvey, Kevin, and Mo: [scream and run away from the airplanes]
SpongeBob: [to Patrick] Oh, we have to find more of those cupcakes. [points away] If we turn back into monsters, maybe we can stop all this.
Patrick: You had me at cupcakes.
SpongeBob and Patrick: [run off]
SpongeBob: [points to the vending machine] There it is! We can save the camp! [repeatedly hits buttons on the vending machine, then they both get launched backwards by the wise kraken crushing it] [looking at a burning cupcake that turns into ashes] Well, there goes that plan. [he and Patrick get up]
Monster: [roars off-screen]
SpongeBob and Patrick: [jump into a bush]
Karen: [emerges from some kelp] I've been looking for you two. [jumps out] I thought I better have some monster cupcake [holds out a crossbow] antidote ready, just in case.
SpongeBob: [takes the crossbow] Ah, thanks, Karen. Will it work on real monsters?
Karen: I have no idea. All I can do is give a crossbow to children and hope for the best.
SpongeBob and Patrick: [leap out of the bush, each with a belt of darts, with SpongeBob holding the crossbow]
Rock monster: [moves through the sand, then leaps out]
SpongeBob: [loads a dart onto the crossbow and shoots the rock monster as it gets closer, turning it into a tiny rock, which he picks up] Patrick, it worked! Now let's go get the rest of 'em.
SpongeBob and Patrick: [laugh and run off]
Wise kraken: [roars as he pulls off the watchtower roof with Perch on it]
Perch: [screams]
SpongeBob: [shoots a dart at the wise kraken, turning him into a salad]
Perch: [screams]
Patrick: [catches the salad]
Perch: [falls down with the roof, shivering]
Patrick: [sniffs the salad, then gets hit by a toy airplane and screams]
SpongeBob: [yelps, jumps out of his clothes to dodge the airplanes]
Patrick: [ducks]
SpongeBob: [loads three more darts, shooting them at Nosferatu, Roxie, and Preda, making them scream and turn into a spider, a paddleball and a baseball bat, then runs off] Patrick, could you pick up those monsters, please?
Patrick: [places a box and puts the rock, the salad, the baseball bat, the paddleball, and the spider into the box]
Campers: [scream and run away from Jimmy, then climb onto a flagpole]
Jimmy: [with Elwood in his mouth, jumping]
SpongeBob: [from behind kelp, shoots a dart at Jimmy, freeing Elwood]
Elwood: That was fun! [catches a jelly cake on a plate in his hand]
Patrick: [takes the cake and puts it into the box]
Elwood: [points] Look!
Wise kraken: [raises the pole to eat the campers]
Campers: [scream]
SpongeBob: Huh? [flicks a dart away and pulls out a much larger one, which he shoots at the kraken]
Wise kraken: [roars, then gets hit with the dart and turns into a much smaller creature, making the campers fall] Shot in the back? I'll tell ya, I got no respect. [falls and yells]
Campers: [scream as they and the pole fall back down]
Patrick: [runs with the box over to SpongeBob]
SpongeBob: [catches the kraken with a fish bowl] Aww, lil' tadpole kraken is so cute. [puts the kraken into the box] Come on, Patrick. Let's get these guys outta here before they turn back into monsters. [he and Patrick laugh and run away]
[Bubble transition to SpongeBob and Patrick arriving where the monster picnic was.]
Patrick: [as he places the objects onto the chairs] Do you think they'll turn back to their normal, boring selves?
SpongeBob: Well, as long as they stay boring, I think we can call it a win.
Patrick: [as they walk away] Hm.
[The monsters turn back to normal.]
Wise kraken: You know, that was kind of fun!
Preda: Let's ditch this support group, and start a rampage group! All in favor, say [howls]!
All: [howl as lightning flashes]
Papa-Squatch: Wait. What about our monster snacks?
Preda: Fine. Snacks first. Then we rampage!
Monsters: [nod, then all howl]