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High and Dry/transcript

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This article is a transcript of the Kamp Koral: SpongeBob's Under Years episode "High and Dry/transcript" from season , which aired on .

  • [Patrick, SpongeBob, Elwood, and Sandy are all following Squidward.]
  • SpongeBob, Patrick, Sandy, and Elwood: [chanting while SpongeBob and Patrick leap over each other] We're going outta water! We're staying overnight! We're going outta water! We're staying overnight!
  • Squidward: [holds hand out] All right, everyone, pipe down and listen up.
  • SpongeBob: [as he and Patrick continue leaping over each other] We're going outta water!
  • Squidward: [yelling] What part of "pipe down and listen up" didn't you understand?
  • Patrick: The "down" part.
  • SpongeBob: Oh, and the "up" part, too. [Patrick falls down onto him]
  • Squidward: [groans] Well, if you wanna earn your out of water overnight badge, pay attention! When we step out of the water onto Bikini Top Island, we use a buddy system. Now, let's see. Hmm...
  • SpongeBob and Patrick: [looking excitedly at each other while giggling]
  • Squidward: [off-screen] Oh, no, that won't do. Oh, let's get [picks up Patrick and switches him and Elwood] you there. Okay, here we go. Alright, now, let's keep moving.
  • [They continue walking as jellyfish fly by.]
  • SpongeBob: Hey, Mr. Tentacles, how are we getting up to the island? Are we gonna take a catapult? Strap boing clams to our feet? [runs around Elwood and sits in the air] Chariots pulled by sea tigers?
  • Squidward: Nope. [pulls on a curtain to open them and reveal an elevator entrance, labeled "OUT OF ORDER"] We're talking the elevator. [sees the sign] Huh? Out of order? Typical. [gestures to the stairs nearby] I guess we're taking the stairs.
  • Elwood: Huh? Yay, stairs! [begins running up the stairs] Whoo-hoo! Yeah!
  • SpongeBob, Patrick, and Sandy: [begin running up the stairs] Yeah! [laughing]
  • Squidward: Oh, boy.
  • [Squidward begins running up the stairs. SpongeBob, Patrick, and Sandy are a story ahead of him, and Elwood is a story ahead of them. They all arrive at the top of the rock.]
  • Sandy: Hey, what are y'all stoppin' for?
  • SpongeBob: [looks to the surface] We've never been out of the water before. It's a little scary.
  • Sandy: [walks ahead of them] Well, that's my world up there. Trust me.
  • Patrick: [yells as he holds onto SpongeBob, both shivering]
  • Sandy: It's as safe as a toothless rattlesnake. So, helmet up, and let's get topside!
  • [SpongeBob and Elwood put on their water helmets. Patrick tries to put his on by hitting his face with it repeatedly. SpongeBob puts the helmet on his head properly.]
  • Patrick: [sighs]
  • All: [walk to the surface, gasp] Whoa.
  • SpongeBob: It's beautiful.
  • Sandy: Ooh, I've been waitin' all day to do this! [takes off her helmet to let out a green stench, fans the air] Whoo-ee, it's ripe in there. [butterflies flying nearby die from the stench]
  • Voice: You stink!
  • Squidward: [walks to the island, groaning, falls on the sand]
  • Campers: [laughing]
  • Squidward: [looks up] Huh?
  • Elwood: [pan over to him and SpongeBob as he trips over a rock and falls]
  • SpongeBob: I gotcha, buddy. [picks Elwood up from the ground]
  • Elwood: Thanks, buddy.
  • Patrick: [pan over to him and Sandy, leaf stuck on his helmet] Help, buddy!
  • Sandy: [holds the leaf] You're in buddy hands, buddy boy.
  • [Pan over to SpongeBob spraying Elwood's helmet with cleaning fluid, then uses a sponge to clean it.]
  • Elwood: Thanks, buddy! [laughs, then sprays SpongeBob's helmet with the fluid]
  • SpongeBob: [laughs]
  • Patrick: [pan over to him holding a leaf near a lounge chair] Please, take a load off, buddy.
  • Sandy: [lounges in the chair] Thanks, buddy.
  • Patrick: [fans Sandy with the leaf]
  • Campers: [jump in the air, hugging each other's buddies] Yay, buddy system!
  • Squidward: [sticks tongue out] Blech.
  • Campers: [overlapping dialogue, repeating "buddy" as they hold Squidward straight]
  • Squidward: Enough with the buddy! [holding a survival guide book] The survival guide says the first thing we should do is find a spot to set up a safe and sturdy camp.
  • Campers: [salute] Yes, sir, counselor Squidward! [run off, leaving Squidward sunk in the sand]
  • SpongeBob: Gotta find a good spot. [runs into some bushes]
  • Elwood: Up there! [jumps on a rock face-first]
  • Patrick: [lifts the rock, making Elwood fall off] What about down here? [drops the rock to let it fall onto his head] Not down here.
  • Squidward: [looking up at the sky] Huh? [in awe] Oh. [pulls out a lounge chair from his backpack, grabs a coconut drink, and hops into the chair] The perfect spot.
  • Sandy: Hey! Buddies! [digging in her backpack as the others arrive] Check this out. [pulls out a cube with a button] It's my latest invention. Instant [presses the button] home on the range. [the cube turns into a shelter and campfire]
  • SpongeBob, Patrick, and Elwood: Whoa!
  • SpongeBob: That's amazing, Sandy!
  • Sandy: [unzips the front door, no longer in her suit, giggles] Thanks.
  • Squidward: The survival guide says once your tent is set, [points away] forage for food. [lounges] So let's see what you pipsqueaks can muster up for me. [shakes head] Uh, I mean, us.
  • Sandy: Perfect. [moves back and forth] Now I get to scurry around in my natural habitat. [cracks knuckles, then begins yelling as she climbs and jumps on trees, laughing]
  • SpongeBob: [he, Patrick, and Elwood jump and cheer] Let's do it! [all take off]
  • Patrick: Food! [jumps on Squidward, trapping him in his chair]
  • Squidward: Thanks, buddies.
  • Sandy: [panting while climbing a tree, then spots a giant coconut on the tree] Ooh. Whoo-ee! They say everything is bigger in [points] Texas, but if'n that ain't the biggest coconut I ever did see. [kicks the coconut off] Hi-yah!
  • Squidward: [opening up his chair] I hope those idiots bring back something-- [gets crushed by the coconut]
  • Sandy: [lands on the coconut]
  • Squidward: [groans as his head emerges]
  • Sandy: Whoops. Sorry, Mr. Tentacles. But some [taps coconut with her foot] tasty coconut meat oughta make you feel better. [raises her arm to chop the coconut] Hi--
  • Patrick: Wait! [pan over to him emerging from the bushes] I'll just crack it open with this [holds up an egg] weird rock I found! [yells as he leaps to hit the coconut with the egg, but gets stopped mid-air by Sandy]
  • Sandy: [arms out] Stop! That's an [points] egg!
  • Patrick: [hits the coconut with the egg anyway, which cracks] No. It's egg-shaped. [raises the egg to hit the coconut again, and the top half flies into the air along with a boiled egg]
  • Sandy: [off-screen] Oh, no!
  • SpongeBob: Sorry, everybody. I couldn't find anything except this non-stick pan. [the boiled egg lands in his pan, which he flips] Whoop. Over easy good for everyone?
  • [A boiled egg slides across the screen as the scene changes to everyone around the campfire with plates of scrambled eggs.]
  • Elwood: Ah.
  • Patrick: [tries to eat his scrambled eggs, but it splatters on his helmet] Aw.
  • SpongeBob: Uhh.
  • Patrick: [jumping] Stupid life-saving helmet!
  • Sandy: [points] I gotcha covered, buddy. [grabs some scrambled eggs, opens up everyone's helmets, then rubs the scrambled eggs to put it in everyone's helmets like fish food]
  • All except Sandy: [inhale to eat the scrambled eggs like fish]
  • Patrick: [begins licking everyone else's scrambled eggs, then swings Squidward around with his tongue]
  • [Bubble transition to the island at night.]
  • Squidward: [off-screen] Lights out.
  • SpongeBob: [off-screen] Night, buddy.
  • Patrick: [off-screen] Sleep tight, buddy.
  • Elwood: [off-screen] Sweet dreams, buddy.
  • Sandy: [off-screen] See ya in the mornin', buddy.
  • SpongeBob: [off-screen] Not if I see you f--
  • Squidward: [off-screen] Shut up and go to sleep!
  • [The moon goes down, and the sun goes up on the opposite side. SpongeBob and Elwood are building a sand pagoda, and Squidward is in his lounge chair.]
  • Sandy: [stretches, sighs]
  • Patrick: [partly unzips the door] Did anyone bring shampoo?
  • Seagull: [heard screaming, getting everyone's attention]
  • All: Huh?
  • Seagull: [flies over the island, screams as it dives towards the campers]
  • All: [scream as Sandy tackles them to dodge the seagull]
  • Sandy: [pushes everyone inside the shelter as the seagull continues flying around]
  • SpongeBob: [fearfully holding Squidward, who is in a sleeping bag] What is that thing?
  • Squidward: [emerges from sleeping bag] And why is it after us?
  • Sandy: [looking through the door window] I reckon it looks like a gull. But I don't know why. [sees Patrick eating scrambled eggs, gasps] That [points] egg Patrick found must've belonged to it!
  • Squidward: [sweating] What are we gonna do now?
  • SpongeBob: Look in your survival guide, Mr. Tentacles.
  • Squidward: [gets out his survival guide and flips through it] "How to escape from a crazy seagull that has you trapped in a tent." Huh, oddly specific. [the book's pages are shown with an illustration of a seagull screaming at a frightened turtle] "Tip One: The frightened turtle pulls its [on the other page, there is an illustration of seagull flying away as the turtle is hiding in its shell] head into its shell. Hide under something sturdy."
  • Sandy: Don't worry, buddies. I got an idea. [unzips the front door, looks around with her arm, and cracks open a coconut with it] Hi-yah! [opens up the coconut to reveal a muscular ant showering in it]
  • Ant: [screams, closes curtains]
  • [Everyone exits the tent with the coconut half over themselves.]
  • Squidward: This oughta fool that dumb bird.]
  • Seagull: [screams]
  • SpongeBob and Squidward: Huh? [whimper as the seagull is inside the coconut]
  • Seagull: [squawks]
  • Campers and Squidward: [yell and run back inside the tent]
  • Squidward: [flipping through the survival guide] "Escape Tip Two: [illustration of a worm scared of a seagull] The scaredy worm skirts the bird. [illustration of a confused seagull near a hole] Dig a tunnel."
  • Patrick: [gets up] Don't worry, guys. I got this. [pulls on his tongue to turn himself into a drill] Follow me! [drills into the ground]
  • Squidward: We are doomed.
  • [Cut to a shot of asphalt, of which Patrick drills up to. He looks up to see humans walking in the city, with a crosswalk nearby.]
  • Patrick: [screams, covers the hole with dirt before a woman's shoe steps over the dirt, re-emerges in the tent] There's some scary stuff down there!
  • Squidward: [mumbling while flipping through pages] Ah. [illustration of a sheep being carried by a seagull] "Tip Three: A lamb takes one for the flock." Ah. We need a sacrifi-- [shakes head] I mean, decoy, to feed that bird away from the rest of the group. Okay. [holds out straws] Short straw is the decoy.
  • [Everyone each pulls out a straw.]
  • Elwood: [raising straw] I won!
  • Squidward: [partly unzips door, shoving Elwood outside] Yep, you sure did. Now, don't forget to [points down] zig-zag. [re-enters tent]
  • Elwood: [running in a straight line] Zig-zag. Zig-zag. Zig-zag. Zig-zag. [gets carried away by the seagull, screams]
  • Patrick: I don't think he did a zag.
  • Squidward: [screaming] Run for it!
  • All except Elwood: [run out of the tent to leave the island, then all except SpongeBob dive for the water]
  • SpongeBob: [gets in front of them] Wait a minute! [the others fall] I can't leave without my buddy! We have to go back and get him!
  • Squidward: Well, let's just take a vote on it. All in favor of leaving Elwood to his fate--
  • [The others run back.]
  • Squidward: [looks behind] Typical.
  • Sandy: [picks up a piece of wood and yells]
  • SpongeBob: [yells while holding a frying pan]
  • Patrick: [swings a sausage weapon while eating a hot dog]
  • Squidward: You had hot dogs this whole time?
  • Patrick: These are battle dogs, not dinner dogs.
  • Squidward: [growls]
  • Elwood: [off-screen] Woo! Woo!
  • All: Huh?
  • Seagull: [squawks on top of a tree]
  • Elwood: Woo! Woo! Woo!
  • Sandy: [jumps onto the tree] Grab a hold, buddies!
  • [SpongeBob grabs onto Sandy, Patrick grabs onto SpongeBob, and Patrick pulls Squidward with him.]
  • Squidward: Huh? [screams as they go up the tree and spot the seagull with Elwood]
  • Elwood: [being poked by the seagull] Woo! Woo!
  • Sandy: [gasps]
  • SpongeBob: [raising frying pan] Stop eating my buddy's face! [screams as he goes over to hit the seagull on the behind]
  • Seagull: [looks behind with a makeup brush in its mouth]
  • SpongeBob: [stammers] What?
  • Elwood: Woo! [raises his head to reveal he has makeup on] This is fun!
  • SpongeBob, Patrick, Sandy, and Squidward: Huh?
  • Seagull: [caws] Hello. I'm Dana Dinsmore. [finger guns] Today's your lucky day. I'm about to change your life. [uses her wing to move everyone into her nest] Right this way, right this way. No pushing, there's room for everyone. [walks off]
  • Elwood: Hi, buddies. You just gotta try the new fall color.
  • Dana: [in front of several makeup boxes] You look a bit pale, but let's face it: everyone goes through problems with their skin. [holding Squidward] Do you mind helping out with the demonstration, hon? [grabs Squidward, leaving his helmet; sits him on a box]
  • Squidward: [gasps for air]
  • Dana: Here's what I'm talking about.
  • [Close-up of Squidward's dried out appearance.]
  • Dana: [off-screen] The bags, the sags, the crinkles, the wrinkles, the sacks, the cracks. [Squidward's nose breaks off]
  • Patrick: Huh? I see it. [points] He's hideous.
  • Dana: But you won't when you start using [holds box] Avion Cosmetics. Whether you got feathers and beaks or scales and gills, Avion's breathable formula will have you on your way to the fabulous glowing radiant skin everyone wants.
  • SpongeBob, Patrick, and Sandy: Ooh.
  • Dana: Avion goes on quick, and lasts all day. 'Cause who has time to reapply, [winks] am I right, girlfriends?
  • SpongeBob, Patrick, Sandy, and Elwood: [laugh]
  • Squidward: [weakly reaches out arm] Help. [chokes himself, turning various different colors and patterns, then disintegrates into ashes as his eyeballs drop]
  • [Bubble transition to the campers and Squidward walking up to Mr. Krabs, who is nailing a poster to a pole with a hammer.]
  • All except Mr. Krabs: [laughing]
  • Mr. Krabs: I see you all survived your goin' outta water stayin' over night excursion. Wait a second. [screams as he notices everyone is wearing makeup while holding Avion boxes]
  • SpongeBob: You know, camp master Krabs, you look a little pale.
  • Sandy: Well, today is your lucky day.
  • Patrick: Our Avion Cosmetics line will change your life forever.
  • Elwood: How about a little [holds up a makeup brush with blush] red for those cheeks?
  • Mr. Krabs: But I'm already red! [shelters his face with his claws] No! [his scream is seen shaking the ground from the island]