Lockdown for Love/transcript

This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "Lockdown for Love" from season 13, which aired on October 22, 2020.

[The episode starts at the Chum Bucket, of which the bucket's handle falls to the ground, and Plankton and Karen are come out of it with a hot air balloon shaped like a heart for a date.]
Karen: Ah, I'm floating on air! A balloon ride, a candle-light dinner, and our wedding song is playing! This day is perfect.
Plankton: No, you're perfect, Karen. You're the best computer wife a copepod could ever have! [types on keyboard] Bon-bon? [he presses a button on the keyboard]
Karen: Oh, I shouldn't. [her computer screen turns into a woman eating a bon-bon]
Plankton: Indulge yourself, my darling.
Karen: Thank you, Plankton. This is truly a date to remember.
Plankton: Well, my love, you haven't seen anything yet. [comes back dressed as Ray Ray] For you, my love! [passes a rose to Karen using his tongue]
Karen: Oh, Ray Ray! [laughs and sniffs rose] Aah.
Plankton: [combs hair] That's right, baby. Ray Ray is at your service. [shines teeth]
Karen: Ray Ray, you've got my cooling fans running on high. [grabs Plankton and knocks down table] Ha, ha. Get over here and give me some sugar! [as Plankton and Karen are about to kiss, Plankton sees Mr. Krabs down from above.]
Plankton: Huh?
Mr. Krabs: ♪Do do do do do♪ [places the formula on top of his boat, and yawns and stretches] What a long day. [he gets in his boat as he leaves the formula behind]
Plankton: [looks down at the formula] [angelic singing] Uh... eh... ehh! Ahhh! I can't take it!
Karen: What is it, Plankton?
Plankton: Hold that thought, baby. I uh- I forgot something down here. I'll be right back! [jumps off from the balloon and his clothes fall off] Can't believe this is really happening. [falls to the ground] The Krabby Patty secret formula is finally mine! Huh? [He goes through the formula; every time he touches it, his hand goes through the formula] Huh? Eh... [The formula disappears] Ehh! [looks for the formula] Hm, eh, ah, eh, eh! Is this some kind of horrible nightmare? What? [the scene cuts to inside the Chum Bucket to reveal that Plankton was on top of a green screen] A projector? You tricked me with a simulation?!
Karen: It was a test, Plankton! And you failed! You fail every time when it comes to our romance.
Plankton: Right, so I goof up one time and now I'm the bad guy?
Karen: One time? Failed one time? [Numbers show up on her screen] How about 4,700,000 and- [glitching] Error, er-er-error.
Plankton: But baby cakes, I left to go get the Krabby Patty secret formula. For me... and you... You know... for us! [puts on a cute face] Ehhh?
Karen: Listen, Sheldon. You need to show me an interruption-free romantic date night because until that happens, no one is leaving the Chum Bucket. [presses an alarm that makes the Chum Bucket go on lockdown]
Plankton: Aah! [a brick wall crushes the front doors as the Chum Bucket's glove grabs some tinfoil as it places it on top of the roof and puts a rubber band on it.] [Karen grabs Plankton, and his Ray Ray clothes get put on] Oof!
Karen: You better not mess this one up, Ray Ray. [flicks Plankton off her hand]
Plankton: Ah! [bubble transition cuts to the next scene, where he is making a stew] ♪Da da da da doo doo♪ I think Karen's favorite "scrap electronics stew" ought to do the trick. [laughing] Yep. Huh? [notices that there is a window] I guess it wouldn't hurt to have just a little peek at the Krusy Krab. [climbs on the window] Hmm. [puts on a binocular]
Mr. Krabs: ♪Dee dee doo dee♪ What a long day. [yawns and stretches again; he gets in his boat and leaves the formula behind again.]
Plankton: [gasps] It's really out there! And this time it's not a hologram! [scratching the window and whimpering] [gets a screwdriver to untwist one of the nails attached to the window.] Uh, uh..
Karen: [clears throat] Plankton! What are you doing?
Plankton: Oh, hey, baby! Just adding the finishing touches to tonight's main course!
Karen: Aww, you are so sweet! I can't wait to try it! [Plankton kisses her screen]
Plankton: Whew! Good one, Plankton. The formula! [puts the binocular back on] Now how am I gonna get you? [breeze blows as the formula rolls to the Chum Bucket.] Yes, yes, yes! [boat runs over the formula] No, no, no! Slow it down, you maniac! [panting] Who's that?
Patrick: Krabby Patty! Krabby Patty!
Plankton: Eesh. It's that numbskull, Patrick. [gets a microphone] Hey, doofus! I mean, star friend.
Patrick: Krabby Patty. [he stops]
Plankton: Over here.
Patrick: Hmm?
Plankton: No, over here! Come on. [Patrick finally looks at the Chum Bucket] Yes, that's it. You've got it. Now who's a good boy? [Patrick starts panting] Okay, now grab that bottle by your feet there. [Patrick grabs a drink container] No. [sighs] The other drink container by your feet.
Patrick: Hmmm.
Plankton: Pick that one up instead.
Patrick: [looks at the Krusty Krab] Uh?
Plankton: By your feet.
Patrick: Huh? Uh?
Plankton: Now look right!
Patrick: Oh, huh! [drops his head into the ground]
Plankton: You have got to be kidding me. Right, Patrick!
Patrick: Uh?
Plankton: Your other right!
Patrick: Oh! [looks at formula]
Plankton: Yes! [laughs] That's it, huh!
Patrick: Ah! [picks up formula]
Plankton: Good boy. Now bring it over here to me. Yes, that's it! Huh? [he notices that Patrick is gone.] Oh, where did he go?! [sees Patrick in the Chum Bucket out of nowhere]
Patrick: Excuse me, are you the window cleaner?
Plankton: How in barnacles did you get in here?
Patrick: I don't know.
Plankton: Well, who cares? Did you bring that bottle I told you to bring?
Patrick: Uh-huh. [shows Plankton drink bottle] Tastes kind of funny, though. [drinks the bottle]
Plankton: No, I said the other one, you moron! [looks at the window as Larry is exercising with people]
Larry: Hey, you guys are doing great! [rolls the formula] Two, there, four! [the formula hits the Chum Bucket]
Plankton: A thin piece of glass is all that stands between me and what I want most in the world. Why is life so unfair?
Karen: Oh, honey? Is dinner almost ready? I'm famished!
Plankton: [he gets nervous] Uh, it's almost finished, my sweetheart! What am I gonna do? Think, Plankton, think! Oh? [pulls off his hair] Idea! [Plankton shows his hair at Patrick] That's it! Karen will never know the difference! Now I think I got what I need right here. [grabs a saw] Patrick, you may feel a slight tickle.
Patrick: Oh, I like tickles. [Plankton saws Patrick into his own shape]
Plankton: Okay, let's get a look at this.
Patrick: Ha, ha! That was intense!
Plankton: Oop! Almost forgot. [he tears off Patrick's right eye.]
Patrick: Ha, ha. Ow!
Plankton: [puts his Ray Ray clothes onto Patrick] You're going on a date with my wife Karen, Ray Ray.
Patrick: Oh, but I sound like Patrick.
Plankton: Oh, no. You keep your mouth shut. I will take care of that. [he puts a microphone in his tooth] [high-pitched feedback] [chuckles, and places Patrick with the soup onto the table] Oh, Karen? Dinner is served, my little love nugget!
Karen: Oh, my gosh. This looks amazing! I loves my Ray Ray. [growls and giggles]
Plankton: And I love my Karen. Now let's dig in! [Ray Ray known as Patrick puts the spoon in his mouth and chews it.]
Karen: [giggling] [bubble transition to the next scene.]
Plankton: [lights a lighter] Krabby Patty secret formula, here I come! [cuts the lighter into the wall]
Karen: Ow! That's a little rough, Ray Ray. [Patrick biting one of Karen's wheels] Ow, Plankton! What are you doing? [Plankton grabs Patrick's hands and has him massage Karen] Ohh. Oh, that feels nice. Ahh, okay. [lies back down] Goodnight.
Plankton: Phew! That was close. [bubble transitions to the next scene]
Krabs: [driving his boatmobile] Yep, we had another money stackin' day, hehehe. Did we? [he gasps as he looks where the formula was, realizing it isn't there anymore] [gasps and panics] Me Krabby Patty secret formuler! [gasps] It must've fell out of me boat! Oh, don't you worry, sweetie! [turns around] Daddy's coming for ya! [he arrives at the Krusty Krab; cut to Plankton burning a hole in the Chum Bucket's wall] Formuler! Where are you, formuler?! [is strangling a customer, and lets go of him; he then does the same with the other customer] What have you done with me secret formuler?! Formuler? Where are ya? Formuler! [runs inside; pops out of the pipe on top] Formuler! [jumps onto the right rim on the roof] Formuler! [jumps onto the flags at the front] Formuler?! [lifts up the Krusty Krab and looks under it] Formuler?! Where are you, formuler?! [his eyes turn around] Plankton! [starts heading toward the Chum Bucket] I know you have me formuler! So just hand it over!
[Plankton notices Mr. Krabs and starts blowing on his torch]
Mr. Krabs: [banging on the front doors] Open up, Plankton! I know you got me formuler!
[The scene cuts to Karen and Patrick on the couch watching TV]
Karen: Huh? Who could that be?
Plankton: Uh, that banging noise? [laughs] That's just the dryer. I thought I'd do the laundry so you wouldn't have to later, kiss kiss.
Karen: Oh, Ray Ray. That's the most romantic thing you've ever said! [pulls Patrick up to her and kisses him]
Plankton: [looks unamused, but a hole appears in the Chum Bucket] The formula is finally mine. [laughs; he tries to bring in the formula, but it doesn't fit in the hole]
Mr. Krabs: [still banging] I know you're in there, Plankton! [notices what Plankton is doing] Huh? Formula. [grabs a hold of the formula as well] Thanks for holding it for me. [He grabs onto it harder, and Plankton does as well]
Plankton: Mine!
Karen: Sheldon, today made up for everything. [her screen turns into a gift] So I wanted to give you a little something. [her screen turns into a graph] After years of research, I finally synthesized the data and came up with a [her screen turns into a Krabby Patty] Krabby Patty secret formula.
Plankton: [gasps and shakes]
Mr. Krabs: Plankton! Let go!
Plankton: Whatever you say, Krabs! [lets go, launching Krabs away] I don't need your stupid hard copy in a bottle anyway, when I have a downloadable version right here!
Mr. Krabs: Jerk!
Plankton: [floats toward Karen as his clothes come back on]
Karen: Now, [the gift on her screen starts opening] the secret formula is...
Plankton: Is what, is what?! What is it?!
Karen: [gasps, and she turns angry] Ray Ray!
Plankton: [nervously laughing and sweating]
Patrick: [raises his hand] Uh, which one of us is Ray Ray?
Plankton: I am, you doofus!
Patrick: Well, well I'm Ray Ray too!
Plankton: No, I'm Ray Ray!
Karen: I don't care who is the real one. [her screen turns into the gift being put into a trash can] You can both watch this formula get deleted.
Plankton: [jumping up and down] Karen! Darling! Sweetie! Please! [her screen turns into the word "DELETED"] Let's talk about this! Noo!
Karen: Don't mess with date night, Plankton!
[A close-up shot of Plankton is shown, where his eye turns into popcorn and pops out, and the rest of him does as well. Patrick starts eating the popcorn]
[The scene bubble transitions to the same hot air balloon from before]
Karen: Now this is truly a wonderful date, Plankton. And thank you for giving me your undivided attention.
Plankton: [completely chained to the chair] I wouldn't miss it for the world, baby.
Karen: Aww.
[Patrick is badly playing a violin, repeating "leedle" over and over again]
Plankton: Oh, boy.
[The scene irises out as it ends]