Season 1 - Meh (5/10)

Season 1A - Subpar (4/10)

Number	Name	Rating
1a	Late for Breakfast	Bad (3/10)
1b	Bummer Jobs	Meh (5/10)
2a	Stair Wars	Terrible (1.5/10)
2b	Enemies à la Mode	Awful (2/10)
3a	Lost in Couch	Good (7/10)
3b	Pat-a-thon	Bad (3/10)
4	The Yard Sale	Decent (6.5/10)
5a	Squidina's Little Helper	Inferior (2.5/10)
5b	I Smell a Pat	Awful (2/10)
6a	Gas Station Vacation	Okay (5.5/10)
6b	Bunny the Barbarian	Decent (6.5/10)
7a	The Haunting of Star House	Subpar (4/10)
7b	Who's a Big Boy?	Unsatisfactory (3.5/10)
8	Terror at 20,000 Leagues	Inferior (2.5/10)
9a	To Dad and Back	Good (7/10)
9b	Survivoring	Meh (5/10)
10a	Just in Time for Christmas	Delightful (7.5/10)
10b	Klopnodian Heritage Festival	Unsatisfactory (3.5/10)
11a	X Marks the Pot	Adequate (6/10)
11b	Patrick's Alley	Awful (2/10)
12a	Pearl Wants to Be a Star	Bad (3/10)
12b	Super Sitters	Inferior (2.5/10)
13a	Nitwit Neighborhood News	Meh (5/10)
13b	Mid-Season Finale	Inferior (2.5/10)
14a	Shrinking Stars	Terrible (1.5/10)
14b	FitzPatrick	Delightful (7.5/10)
15a	Uncredible Journey	Mediocre (4.5/10)
15b	Host-a-Palooza	Unsatisfactory (3.5/10)
16a	Backpay Payback	Great (8/10)
16b	House Hunting	Mediocre (4.5/10)
17a	The Drooling Fool	Dreadful (1/10)
17b	Patrick's Got a Zoo Loose	Bad (3/10)

Season 1B - Good (7/10)

Number	Name	Rating
18a	The Patterfly Effect	Decent (6.5/10)
18b	A Space Affair to Remember	Mediocre (4.5/10)
19a	Home ECCH!	Delightful (7.5/10)
19b	Fun & Done!	Amazing (9/10)
20a	The Lil' Patscals	Great (8/10)
20b	The Prehistoric Patrick Star Show	Meh (5/10)
21a	The Patrick Show Sells Out	Sublime (8.5/10)
21b	Neptune's Ball	Good (7/10)
22a	Dad's Stache Stash	Sublime (8.5/10)
22b	A Root Galoot	Unsatisfactory (3.5/10)
23a	The Starry Awards	Good (7/10)
23b	Blorpsgiving	Subpar (4/10)
24a	Stuntin'	Decent (6.5/10)
24b	Olly Olly Organ Free	Delightful (7.5/10)
25a	Which Witch is Which?	Good (7/10)
25b	Get Off My Lawnie	Okay (5.5/10)
26a	Bubble Bass Reviews	Amazing (9/10)
26b	Patrick's Prison Pals	Bad (3/10)

Season 1A episodes ranked

File:Backpay Payback title card.png 1	File:FitzPatrick title card.png 2	File:Just in Time for Christmas title card.png 3	File:To Dad and Back title card.png 4	File:Lost in Couch title card.png 5
File:The Yard Sale title card.png 6	File:Bunny the Barbarian title card.png 7	File:X Marks the Pot title card.png 8	File:Gas Station Vacation title card.png 9	File:Bummer Jobs title card.png 10
File:Nitwit Neighborhood News title card.png 11	File:Survivoring title card.png 12	File:House Hunting title card.png 13	File:Uncredible Journey title card.png 14	File:The Haunting of Star House title card.png 15
File:Host-a-Palooza title card.png 16	File:Who's a Big Boy? title card.png 17	File:Klopnodian Heritage Festival title card.png 18	File:Late for Breakfast title card.png 19	File:Pat-a-thon title card.png 20
File:Pearl Wants to Be a Star title card.png 21	File:Patrick's Got a Zoo Loose title card.png 22	File:Terror at 20,000 Leagues title card.png 23	File:Squidina's Little Helper title card.png 24	File:Super Sitters title card.png 25
File:Mid-Season Finale title card.png 26	File:I Smell a Pat title card.png 27	File:Enemies à la Mode title card.png 28	File:Patrick's Alley title card.png 29	File:Stair Wars title card.png 30
File:Shrinking Stars title card.png 31	File:The Drooling Fool title card.png 32

Season 1B episodes ranked

File:Fun & Done! title card.png 1	File:Bubble Bass Reviews title card.png 2	File:The Patrick Show Sells Out title card.png 3	File:Dad's Stache Stash title card.png 4	File:The Lil' Patscals title card.png 5
File:Home ECCH! title card.png 6	File:Olly Olly Organ Free title card.png 7	File:Which Witch is Which? title card.png 8	File:Neptune's Ball title card.png 9	File:The Starry Awards title card.png 10
File:The Patterfly Effect title card.png 11	File:Stuntin' title card.png 12	File:Get Off My Lawnie title card.png 13	File:The Prehistoric Patrick Star Show title card.png 14	File:A Space Affair to Remember title card.png 15
File:Blorpsgiving title card.png 16	File:A Root Galoot title card.png 17	File:Patrick's Prison Pals title card.png 18

Season 1 episodes ranked

File:Fun & Done! title card.png 1	File:Bubble Bass Reviews title card.png 2	File:The Patrick Show Sells Out title card.png 3	File:Dad's Stache Stash title card.png 4	File:Backpay Payback title card.png 5
File:The Lil' Patscals title card.png 6	File:FitzPatrick title card.png 7	File:Just in Time for Christmas title card.png 8	File:Home ECCH! title card.png 9	File:Olly Olly Organ Free title card.png 10
File:To Dad and Back title card.png 11	File:Lost in Couch title card.png 12	File:Which Witch is Which? title card.png 13	File:Neptune's Ball title card.png 14	File:The Starry Awards title card.png 15
File:The Yard Sale title card.png 16	File:The Patterfly Effect title card.png 17	File:Bunny the Barbarian title card.png 18	File:Stuntin' title card.png 19	File:X Marks the Pot title card.png 20
File:Get Off My Lawnie title card.png 21	File:Gas Station Vacation title card.png 22	File:The Prehistoric Patrick Star Show title card.png 23	File:Bummer Jobs title card.png 24	File:Nitwit Neighborhood News title card.png 25
File:Survivoring title card.png 26	File:A Space Affair to Remember title card.png 27	File:House Hunting title card.png 28	File:Uncredible Journey title card.png 29	File:Blorpsgiving title card.png 30
File:The Haunting of Star House title card.png 31	File:Host-a-Palooza title card.png 32	File:A Root Galoot title card.png 33	File:Who's a Big Boy? title card.png 34	File:Klopnodian Heritage Festival title card.png 35
File:Late for Breakfast title card.png 36	File:Pat-a-thon title card.png 37	File:Patrick's Prison Pals title card.png 38	File:Pearl Wants to Be a Star title card.png 39	File:Patrick's Got a Zoo Loose title card.png 40
File:Terror at 20,000 Leagues title card.png 41	File:Squidina's Little Helper title card.png 42	File:Super Sitters title card.png 43	File:Mid-Season Finale title card.png 44	File:I Smell a Pat title card.png 45
File:Enemies à la Mode title card.png 46	File:Patrick's Alley title card.png 47	File:Stair Wars title card.png 48	File:Shrinking Stars title card.png 49	File:The Drooling Fool title card.png 50

Season 2 - Good (7/10)

Number	Name	Rating
27a	The Patrick Show Cashes In	Delightful (7.5/10)
27b	The Star Games	Mediocre (4.5/10)
28a	Super Stars	Subpar (4/10)
28b	Now Museum, Now You Don't	Delightful (7.5/10)
29a	10 & 1 Toilets	Awful (2/10)
29b	Family Plotz	Unsatisfactory (3.5/10)
30a	The Wrath of Shmandor	Meh (5/10)
30b	There Goes the Neighborhood	Good (7/10)
31a	Movie Stars	Amazing (9/10)
31b	Dr. Smart Science	Sublime (8.5/10)
32a	The Commode Episode	Good (7/10)
32b	Tying the Klop-Knot	Bad (3/10)
33a	Chum Bucket List	Magnificent (9.5/10)
33b	Big Baby Patrick	Inferior (2.5/10)
34a	Is There a Director in the House?	Decent (6.5/10)
34b	Star Cruise	Okay (5.5/10)
35a	Best Served Cold	Good (7/10)
35b	Tattoo Hullabaloo	Great (8/10)
36a	Too Many Patricks	Sublime (8.5/10)
36b	Much Tofu About Nothing	Decent (6.5/10)
37a	Face/Off-Model	Great (8/10)
37b	5 Star Restaurant	Amazing (9/10)
38a	At Home, on the Lam	Sublime (8.5/10)
38b	Pick Patrick's Path	Amazing (9/10)
39a	Time to Eat	Magnificent (9.5/10)
39b	Cleanin' House	Adequate (6/10)

Season 2 episodes ranked

File:Chum Bucket List title card.png 1	File:Time to Eat title card.png 2	File:5 Star Restaurant title card.png 3	File:Pick Patrick's Path title card.png 4	File:Movie Stars title card.png 5
File:At Home, on the Lam title card.png 6	File:Too Many Patricks title card.png 7	File:Dr. Smart Science title card.png 8	File:Tattoo Hullabaloo title card.png 9	File:Face Off-Model title card.png 10
File:The Patrick Show Cashes In title card.png 11	File:Now Museum, Now You Don't title card.png 12	File:The Commode Episode title card.png 13	File:There Goes the Neighborhood title card.png 14	File:Best Served Cold title card.png 15
File:Is There a Director in the House? title card.png 16	File:Much Tofu About Nothing title card.png 17	File:Cleanin' House title card.png 18	File:Star Cruise title card.png 19	File:The Wrath of Shmandor title card.png 20
File:The Star Games title card.png 21	File:Super Stars title card.png 22	File:Family Plotz title card.png 23	File:Tying the Klop-Knot title card.png 24	File:Big Baby Patrick title card.png 25
File:10 & 1 Toilets title card.png 26

Season 3 - Great (8/10)

Number	Name	Rating
40a	The Fun Bucket	Good (7/10)
40b	The Patrick Show After Dark	Sublime (8.5/10)
41a	Chopping Spree	Amazing (9/10)
41b	All Bot Myself	Meh (5/10)
42a	Star-Robics	Delightful (7.5/10)
42b	Who's the Dummy Now?	Bad (3/10)
43a	Patrick Show Land	Decent (6.5/10)
43b	Legend of the Lost Bathroom	Great (8/10)
44a	Driven to Drive	Sublime (8.5/10)
44b	A Patty in Time	Magnificent (9.5/10)
45a	Pat-per Route	Amazing (9/10)
45b	Day of the Dartfish	Mediocre (4.5/10)
46a	Patty Poo
46b	Swaptoberfest
47a	Patrickle Jokes
47b	Pat Roast
48a	All Out of Idea Bricks
48b	A Fool Schooled
49	Something Stupid This Way Comes
50	Thanks But No Thanksgiving
51a	Get Ouch
51b	Day of the Living Dad Jokes
52	Squidina's Holidaze Special

Season 3 episodes ranked

File:A Patty in Time title card.png 1	File:Pat-per Route title card.png 2	File:Chopping Spree title card.png 3	File:Driven to Drive title card.png 4	File:The Patrick Show After Dark title card.png 5
File:Legend of the Lost Bathroom title card.png 6	File:Star-Robics title card.png 7	File:The Fun Bucket title card.png 8	File:Patrick Show Land title card.png 9	File:All Bot Myself title card.png 10
File:Day of the Dartfish title card.png 11	File:Who's the Dummy Now? title card.png 12

Season 4 - TBA (?/10)

Number	Name	Rating
53a	Sitcom Stars
53b	The Show Must Go Yawn
54a	The Dated Game
54b	Ice Cream Headache
55a	A Tinkle in Time
55b	TV or Not TV
56a	Two Pests in a Teapot
56b	Partial Recall
57a	The Haunting of Flim-Flam House
57b	Rube Tube
58a	Sea Haw
58b	Lil' Past-Cals
59a	Zoo U
59b	A Remembrance of Grand-Past
60a	Pat-Tathalon
60b	Upturn's Downturn
61a	Planet Moron
61b	Stare Wars
62a	Safety Worst
62b	De-Pat-ment Store
63a	TBA
63b	TBA
64a	TBA
64b	TBA
65a	TBA
65b	TBA

Season 4 episodes ranked

TBA