This is my log of favorite quotes from the show.

Season 1

1c: Tea at the Treedome

SpongeBob: I don't need it... I don't need it... I NEEEEEED IT!

Patrick: WHAT KIND OF PLACE IS THIS?

2a: Bubblestand

Patrick: AHAHAHAAHAH! It's a giraffe! BWAHAHAAAHAA!

2b: Ripped Pants

SpongeBob: I need... I need... a tailor... 'cause I ripped my pants!

3a: Jellyfishing

Patrick: Firmly grasp it!

3b: Plankton!

<poem> Plankton: Shut your mouth, you mediocre clarinet player. Squidward: Mediocre? Plankton: You pretentious little insignificant artist. Your snivelly creations are worth less than a protozoan's waste! </poem>

Plankton: This is my lab... and this is my laboratory!

4a: Naughty Nautical Neighbors

<poem> SpongeBob: [playing on the "bassinet"] Squidward... is my best friend in the world! Squidward... Patrick: ...likes Patrick more than SpongeBob! </poem>

7a: Hall Monitor

Patrick: He's just standing there... MENACINGLY!

8a: Sandy's Rocket

<poem> Patrick: Wait, what's that? I think I'm gonna be sick. SpongeBob: Patrick, do you know what this thing is? Patrick: Stinky. SpongeBob: No, it's an egg sack! Let's look at the embryo. SpongeBob and Patrick: Twins. </poem>

Mrs. Puff: This is going on your permanent record!

10a: Culture Shock

Squidward: Our next act is living proof that nepotism is alive and well.

11b: Squidward the Unfriendly Ghost

Patrick: G7!! King me, king me!

15b: Suds

Patrick: Don't touch me, I'm sterile!

16a: Valentine's Day

Patrick: HEART ON STICK MUST DIE!

Patrick: I DEFY YOU, HEART MAN!

Patrick: PATRICK NEEDS LOVE, TOO!

19b: Neptune's Spatula

Neptune: You have the physique of Atlas! Come, make poses with me!

Season 2

21a: Your Shoe's Untied

<poem> Flying Dutchman: And stop staring at me with 'em big ol' eyes! SpongeBob: [shrinks eyes] </poem>

Squidward: I think my heart just stopped

22a: Something Smells

Patrick: Look at it! LOOK AT IT!

<poem> SpongeBob: I'm ugly... and I'm proud! Squidward: Is that what he calls it? </poem>

22b: Bossy Boots

SpongeBob: Hello, pole!

23a: Big Pink Loser

<poem> Customer: Is this the Krusty Krab? Patrick: No, this is Patrick! I'm not a Krusty Krab... </poem>

Fish: Hey pal, you just blow in from stupid town?

23b: Bubble Buddy

<poem> SpongeBob: Oh no, Squidward, wait! There's cheese on these patties! Squidward: And? SpongeBob: Bubble Buddy's lactose-intolerant, he can't eat cheese! What should we do? </poem>

<poem> Tom: He poisoned our water supply, burned our crops and delivered a plague unto our houses! Protesters: He did? Tom: No... But are we gonna wait around until he does? </poem>

24a: Dying for Pie

Pirate: Oh these pies aren't homemade, they were made in a factory. A bomb factory...they're bombs.

25a: Wormy

Patrick: Sorry, I don't speak Italian.

25b: Patty Hype

<poem> SpongeBob: Who's number 46853? Crowd: [deafening roar] </poem>

26a: Grandma's Kisses

Patrick: You must first acquire a taste for... FREE-FORM JAZZ.

26b: Squidville

SpongeBob: Squidward, you're steaming! You're like a steamed vegetable, only smarter.

27a: Pre-Hibernation Week

Fish: GOLD TEAM RULES!

Patrick: WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?!

27b: Life of Crime

Patrick: RECTANGLES!

Patrick: You ate my only food... now I'm gonna starve!

28: Christmas Who

Patrick: HAHAHAHA just like a genie!

29a: Survival of the Idiots

Patrick: Who you callin' pinhead?

Patrick: That's not disturbing! This is disturbing. *turns around* HI SPONGEBOB. MY NAME IS PATBACK.

29b: Dumped

Patrick: I THOUGHT WHAT WE HAD WAS SPECIAL!

30a: No Free Rides

SpongeBob: EDUCATIONAL TELEVISION! OH NOOOO!

31a: Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy III

<poem> Man Ray: Excuse me, sir, but I do believe you've dropped your wallet. Patrick: Doesn't look familiar to me. Man Ray: What? I just saw you drop it. Here. Patrick: Nope, it's not mine. Man Ray: It is yours. I am trying to be a good person and return it to you. Patrick: Return what to who? Man Ray: [facepalms, then shows Patrick his ID] Aren't you Patrick Star? Patrick: Yup. Man Ray: And this is your ID. Patrick: Yup. Man Ray: I found this ID in this wallet. And if that's the case, this must be your wallet. Patrick: That makes sense to me. Man Ray: Then take it. Patrick: It's not my wallet. </poem>

32b: The Smoking Peanut

Mr. Krabs: But it's... free day!

33a: Shanghaied

SpongeBob: And the only way out is through the... perfume department!

33b: Gary Takes a Bath

SpongeBob: Gold doubloons! Don't drop 'em!

34b: Frankendoodle

Patrick: Where's the leak, ma'am?

Patrick: FINLAND!

35a: The Secret Box

Patrick: The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma.

35b: Band Geeks

<poem> Patrick: Is mayonnaise an instrument? Squidward: No, Patrick, mayonnaise is not an instrument. Patrick: *raises hand* Squidward: Horse radish isn't an instrument, either. </poem>

Patrick: Whoever's the owner of the white sedan, you left your lights on.

<poem> Fish: Well maybe we wouldn't sound so bad if SOME PEOPLE didn't try to play with their BIG, MEATY CLAWS. Mr. Krabs: These claws ain't just for attracting mates! Fish: Bring it on old man, bring it on! </poem>

<poem> Squidward: When people want to act smart, they talk loud, right? Plankton: CORRECT! </poem>

37b: I'm with Stupid

Patrick: Janet?! Marty?! WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?!

38a: Sailor Mouth

SpongeBob: Here's one somebody didn't finish! Squidward smells... good!

SpongeBob: Krabs is a [dolphin noise]

<poem> SpongeBob: Hi, Patrick! Hey, Patrick, do you know what this word means? Patrick: "Krabs..." Uh, isn't that the red sweaty guy you work for? SpongeBob: Nuh-uh, not that word, that word. Patrick: Hmm... [dolphin noise]! </poem>

38b: Artist Unknown

<poem> Squidward: Your search is over. I am Bikini Bottom's greatest artiste. I call this one: "Squidward en repose". Monty P. Moneybags: I, uh, don't think that will fit in with the other pieces in my collection. Squidward: Why not? Monty P. Moneybags: Because, it's an art collection. BWAHAHAHAHA! </poem>

<poem> Monty P. Moneybags: Bold and Brash, more like belongs in the trash! BWAHAHAHAHA! Garbage Man: Sorry, I must've missed that one. </poem>

SpongeBob: Ohhh, it's so obvious. I would've never thought of that. I'm sorry, Squidward. I came here to learn and I arrogantly shoved your lessons. [falls down and starts crying] I'll never be a great artist like you! I don't deserve your tutoring. I don't deserve to be in your presence. [crawls over to the front door and looks back at Squidward] I don't even deserve to use your doors! [the doors open, hitting SpongeBob out the window into the garbage dumpster head-first] But I did deserve that. [the dumpster closes on top of him] I deserved that, too. [garbage man takes SpongeBob to dump] And I deserve this!

39b: The Fry Cook Games

Plankton: Square... the shape of evil!

Patrick: MY NAME'S... NOT... RICK!!!

Patrick: Y'know, these were white when I bought 'em.

40a: Squid on Strike

SpongeBob: Gee, being on strike with Squidward sure is a kick. Squidward's words are still buzzing around in my head like an angry jellyfish. Squidward was right! I can't just sit here, it's time for action! I will restore the working man to his rightful glory. I will dismantle this oppressive establishment board by board! I will saw the tables of tyranny in half. Gnaw at the ankles of big business! Squidward will be so proud!

40b: Sandy, SpongeBob, and the Worm

Mr. Krabs: You'll never get a cent out of me! I'd rather that worm come in here right now and EAT YOU ALL ALIVE!!!

Season 3

41a: The Algae's Always Greener

<poem> Nat: You think this is funny? Plankton: In a cosmic sort of way, yes. Nat: Well, Mr. Funny Man, is this how you get your sick kicks?! Plankton: What, it's just an ordinary Krabby — OH MY GOODNESS! </poem>

Plankton: Goodbye everyone, I'll remember you all in therapy!

41b: SpongeGuard on Duty

Fish: Dude, put that thing away! There are like, children here!

42a: Club SpongeBob

Patrick: We told you you wouldn't fit in!

42b: My Pretty Seahorse

Fish: I can't find the coin slot... oh, here it is!

43b: The Bully

<poem> Fish: HOW MANY TIMES DO WE HAVE TO TEACH YOU THIS LESSON, OLD MAN?! Old Man: I love the young people! </poem>

44b: Idiot Box

http://spongebob.wikia.com/wiki/Idiot_Box_(transcript)

45b: Doing Time

SpongeBob: PUT THE MONEY... IN THE BAG! PUT IT IN!

46a: Snowball Effect

<poem> SpongeBob: We signed a peace treaty, Squidward. You were right, fighting is for children. Squidward: No, no, no, I misled you, it's for adults too! Give me that peace treaty! There! Let the war continue! SpongeBob: Squidward, that wasn't the peace treaty. That was a copy of the peace treaty. </poem>

<poem> Patrick: Hey, SpongeBob? SpongeBob: Yes, Patrick? Patrick: I think Squidward's taking this really seriously. That last one had his clarinet in it. </poem>

46b: One Krabs Trash

Patrick: I have three dollars.

47a: As Seen on TV

<poem> Fred: Excuse me, sir, can I get a napkin? SpongeBob: Why, of course, good sir. And next time, feel free to approach me. It most be so degrading to ask across the room. And who am I making this bad boy out to? Fred: To my tail fin. I'll get it myself. SpongeBob: F-I-N. There we are, darling. Hmph. Looks like shyness got the best of him. Squidward: There you are, SpongeBob. I need you to... SpongeBob: No problem, Squidward. I got one already made out. Enjoy. Squidward: [holds a napkin reading, "To my tailfin; Love, SpongeBob] To my tailfin? </poem>

SpongeBob: The best time to wear a striped sweater... is all the time... one with a collar... turtleneck!

<poem> Mr. Krabs: Well, SpongeBob, looks like you've finally found your calling. SpongeBob: I'll say. I'm so glad I gave up fry cooking for this. </poem>

48a: No Weenies Allowed

Fish: It took us three days to make that potato salad.... THREE DAYS!

<poem> Patrick: Okay, but I must warn you. I happen to be a world championship... uhh... ...kick boxer. SpongeBob: I don't care if you're the demon seed of Davy Jones! You're goin' down, Tubby! Patrick: Tubby? Grr! Nobody calls me Tubby! [punches SpongeBob in the eye] SpongeBob: Wait, Patrick, you're supposed to let me win, remember? Patrick: Oh yeah. [invisible punches] No, please wait. No, please, have mercy! </poem>

48b: Squilliam Returns

Patrick: I thought the Corps would help me straighten out my life, SIR!

<poem> Squidward: Patrick, can you take hats in a dignified and sophisticated manner? Patrick: You mean like a weenie? </poem>

49a: Krab Borg

<poem> SpongeBob: Squidward, the robots have taken over the Navy! Squidward: Not the Navy! </poem>

49b: Rock-a-Bye Bivalve

Patrick: Let's have another.

50a: Wet Painters

Patrick: Wait, SpongeBob! We're not cavemen! We have technology!

50b: Krusty Krab Training Video

Announcer: As shown here by this graph... ahem... GRAPH!

51: Party Pooper Pants

<poem> SpongeBob: Squidward, you made it! Squidward: My cable's out. SpongeBob: Oh, uhh, sorry to hear about that. [SpongeBob hides some wire cutters behind his back] </poem>

<poem> Mr. Krabs: What does yours say, Plankton? Plankton: Oh, uhh, it says, 'Discuss the secret ingredient of the Krabby Patty formula.' How interesting. Mr. Krabs: Nice try, Plankton. </poem>

52a: Chocolate with Nuts

<poem> SpongeBob: Hi mailman! Mailman: AGHHHHHHHHHHHHH! SpongeBob: Okay, see you tomorrow! </poem>

Patrick: I love you.

<poem> Patrick: I've got it! Let's get naked. SpongeBob: Nah, let's save it for when we're selling real estate. </poem>

52b: Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy V

<poem> SpongeBob: [whispering in Mermaid Man's ear] Psst. Hey, Mermaid Man, get a Krabby Patty. Mermaid Man: I've made my decision. Line of Customers: Hooray! Mermaid Man: One Krabby Patty for me and a Pipsqueak Patty for the boy. Barnacle Boy: Now, wait just a darn minute. Line of Customers: Awww! </poem>

<poem> Barnacle Man: I am crossing over... to the dark side! Mr. Krabs: Why should I waste money lighting the whole store? </poem>

Mermaid Man: Don't worry, good citizens! Nothing will stop me from defeating the E.V.I.L.! Nothing! [ice cream truck sounds] Ice cream? I love ice cream! A double scoop of prune with bran sprinkles. Mmm. [explodes] Goes right through me every time.

SpongeBob: Want to see me run to that mountain and back? [doesn't move] Want to see me do it again?

Narrator: The International Justice League of Super Acquaintances! A subsidiary of Viacom.

Chief: Our sources last found E.V.I.L. harassing teenagers up at "Make Out Reef." You know, Make-Out Reef? [makes out with himself] Whoo hoo hoo!

<poem> Barnacle Man: We did it, we won! This day belongs to E.V.I.L.! You've lost Mermaid Man, and the superhero and super-villain rules say you have to give in to my demands. Mermaid Man: Okay, what do you want? Man Ray: World domination! Tell him we want world domination! Dirty Bubble: And make him eat dirt! Hahaha! [Man Ray stares at him] In addition to the...domination thing. Barnacle Man: Number one, I want to be treated like a superhero, not a sidekick. Number two, I want to be called Barnacle Man. And number three... Man Ray: Come on, world domination! Barnacle Man: I want an adult-sized Krabby Patty. Dirty Bubble: Did you hear him say anything about eating dirt? Barnacle Man: Need a hand, superpal? Mermaid Man: Good to have you back on the side of justice, Kyle. Let's go get you that Krabby Patty! Man Ray: Was that it? Oh, that's sickening. Dirty Bubble: Oh, this reminds me of the time I went to Cancun with the killer shrimp. Oh, they had these papaya drinks... Man Ray: Oh, Neptune, shut up! </poem>

53a: New Student Starfish

Patrick: LIGHT BULB! But why must it be so far away?

53b: Clams

Mr. Krabs: That's a 4/4 string ostinato in D minor! Every sailor knows it means death!

54: Ugh

SpongeGar: Tabanga, Gary! TABANGA!

55a: The Great Snail Race

Sandy: That's for yesterday, SquarePants!

Squidward: And the first place trophy goes to Squidward... TORTELLINI?!

55b: Mid-Life Crustacean

SpongeBob: Patrick, that's not a ride!

Patrick: Fine. I guess you're gonna miss... the panty raid.

Mr. Krabs: I'm feeling a warm spot.

56a: Born Again Krabs

Mr. Krabs: What, you think I could've gotten more?

57a: Krabby Land

<poem> Mr. Krabs: The children? I don't care about the children. I just care about their parents' money. Ah, the fact that their feeble minds are easily manipulated by cheap playgrounds and talentless clowns is no skin off my nose. [climbs out window] Survival of the fittest, SpongeBob! Survival of the fittest. Kid: Ahem. Mr. Krabs: Huh? [angry children are standing behind him] Oh, hey kids. Uh... Uncle Krabs has to go to the bank now. Heh. </poem>

57b: The Camping Episode

<poem> SpongeBob: Customization! Patrick: Genius! SpongeBob: He's tenderizing the ground! Patrick: Of course! SpongeBob: Write that down, write that down! Patrick: UhHHH! *plays tic tac toe* </poem>

Patrick: Well, maybe it's stupid, but it's also dumb!

58a: Missing Identity

Robber: Alright, nobody move! This is a bank robbery! ATTICA!!!

58b: Plankton's Army

Plankton: Felicitations, malefactors! I am endeavoring to misappropriate the formulary for the preparation of affordable comestibles! WHO WILL JOIN ME?!

60a: SpongeBob Meets the Strangler

Patrick: Hey mac, what are you in for?

Season 4

61a: Fear of a Krabby Patty

Plankton: Wait, where'd you get that piano?

Mr. Krabs: Give it up for day 15!!

62b: Krabs vs. Plankton

Plankton: I'M SORRY GRAM-GRAM!

63: Have You Seen This Snail?

Squidward: What are those neanderthals doing? Don't they know I'm busy spoiling my-- AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! *pants heavily*

Patrick: It's the apocalypse! Office products falling from the sky!

SpongeBob: GARY LOVED BALSA WOOD!

64a: Skill Crane

Squidward: Because I'm all out of MONEYYYY!

65a: Selling Out

Carl: Look around, Eugene. Our customers are quite content with the contrived... and the mediocre.

Carl: Now Squidward, you wouldn't want to have to talk to human resources...would you?

Carl: Code red! Free thinker!

69b: Mrs. Puff, You're Fired

<poem> Sergeant: Second Rule: no eating in my class. Would anyone care for a bon-bon? Student: Uhh, I'll eat one. Sergeant: Pick your favorite. [takes one and eats it] How's it taste? Student: It's a delightful taste sensation. Sergeant: No eating in my classroom! [throws student through door] </poem>

Patrick: My pants!

71a: Whale of a Birthday

<poem> Cashier: Mr. Krabs, huh? Quick, how do you spell Krabs? SpongeBob: Um, I'm pretty sure it has a B in it? Cashier: Close enough. [scans card] </poem>

Squidward: When my tear ducts get issue, I can't use just any tissue... I need 4-ply, 4-Ply, 4-Ply, when I cry... Huh!

71b: Karate Island

<poem> Udon: He is forbidden to leave until...he signs this contract. Sandy: What are you talking about? Udon: Real estate. Sandy: You mean this whole thing was a scam to get us to buy real estate? Master Udon: Yes. If there was a real Karate Island, I'd be a millionaire. SpongeBob: You mean I'm not King of Karate? Udon: No. But you could be King of Condos. Here, let me explain. It's really quite simple. See, if you invest in a time share here on Condo Island, you can see your equity increase ten-fold. Perhaps you and your yellow friend would like to set up a timeshare plan? SpongeBob: Don't do it, Sandy! Sandy: I won't give in to your timeshare vacation scam! Udon: Then give into my fists! </poem>

Squidward: I'm here! The King of Clarinets has arrived!

72b: Wishing You Well

<poem> Squidward: You're making me claustrophobic. Patrick: What does that mean? SpongeBob: It means he's afraid of Santa Claus! Squidward: No it doesn't! Patrick: HO HO HO! SpongeBob: Stop it Patrick, you're scaring him! </poem>

74b: Wigstruck

Movie Theater Worker: [everyone runs out] I told you that movie was terrible.

75a: Squidtastic Voyage

French Narrator: Today, we study the gentle of rhythm of the sea. [loud music is heard coming from the pineapple] Gentle rhythm!

76a: The Thing

Kelpy G: Salutations, my children!

76b: Hocus Pocus

<poem> Kid: [crying] BUT I DON'T LIKE PISTACHIO!! Dad: THEN WHY DID YOU ASK FOR IT? Kid: [car hits bump and ice cream flies away] [cries some more] </poem>

77a: Driven to Tears

<poem> Mr. Krabs: I realized there's a lot of young people on the go these days. They don't have time to sit down and eat. They're too busy out on the open road living their dreams. SpongeBob: I used to have a dream. Mr. Krabs: Yeah? I used to have a kidney stone. Everything passes eventually. </poem>

<poem> Patrick: Oh, I don't have a boat mobile anymore. SpongeBob: What? Patrick: It stopped working so I threw it away. The needle was on E and I figured that must mean end. </poem>

Season 5

81: Friend or Foe

Potty: Something called a G.E.D., my man.

Stinky: Let's just meet in the middle and say you Li-Spect me!

83c: Fungus Among Us

Fish: I supersede all of you, for I have an exotic accent.

84a: Spy Buddies

Patrick: Self-destruct!

88c: Slimy Dancing

SpongeBob: Sorry Squidward, you've got to go lower to win!

89b: Sing a Song of Patrick

Vendor Fish: Cotton candy! Get your cotton candy!

Fish: IT'S ... IN ... MY ... HEAD!!!

Old Man Jenkins: I like it!

90a: A Flea in Her Dome

Patrick: All you've brought us is fleas, and trouble and pain and itching and a rash. And pain and fleas and itching and... pain. So... much... pain!! So much pain.

90c: The Krusty Plate

SpongeBob: MOOOOOOORE POWER!!!! MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE POWER!!!!! MAAAAAAAAXIMUM POWER!!!!111!!11! AAHGHGHGHHHHHHHH!

91b: Le Big Switch

<poem> Squidward: You sold me?! Mr. Krabs: Bartered is more like it! Squidward: You're pathetic! </poem>

<poem> Pearl: Daddy, the house is full of burglars! Mr. Krabs: Don't worry, those are just friendly repo men! </poem>

94b: Mermaid Man vs. SpongeBob

Mermaid Man: Why these things are... [mind control kicks in] EVIL!

95a: The Inmates of Summer

<poem> Warden: Because it so happens that it is my sworn duty to think of fun thigns to do with the trash that society has thrown away! SpongeBob: I always prefer to recycle. </poem>

<poem> Warden: Now, which one of you vile, low-down, vile miserable wretched swines left this pathetic, worthless, horror and meaningless... SpongeBob: Uh... abomination? </poem>

97a: 20,000 Patties Under the Sea

<poem> SpongeBob: Breaker, breaker outer perimeter, looks clear. Over. Patrick: Robert, Robert...uhh...Ronald, Ronald, Ryan. SpongeBob: Are you sure you're not trying to say Roger? Patrick: Oh, wait I got it. Ringo. </poem>

99a: The Two Faces of Squidward

<poem> Squidward: And stop bringing your neighbors to work! Patrick: We're not just neighbors! SpongeBob: You can say that again! Patrick: We're not just-- Squidward: I DON'T CARE! </poem>

Season 6

101b: Krabby Road

Patrick: Can I get mine in pink? [scene skips to Patrick with t-shirt] It looks like a tattoo!

106a: A Life in a Day

<poem> Patrick: SpongeBob, these are the best years of our lives, and you want to waste them blowing bubbles? We should be living in the moment! We should be living like Lar... [hears sea horses neighing] This is it, SpongeBob! This is where we redeem our miserable lives! It's time to start... LIVIN' LIKE LARRY! [jumps onto the back of a sea horse, and he then rides around] Hey, SpongeBob! SpongeBob? SpongeBob: is on a kiddie ride outside a grocery store] I'm living like Larry! Whoo-hoo! </poem>

<poem> SpongeBob: What are you two lazy bones doing lying around? There's a really cool ramp down the hall, I've got room for two more. What would Larry do? Larry: What would Larry do? I'll show you what Larry would do! </poem>

112a: Porous Pockets

<poem> Patrick: No! You always give a choking victim the Slimelich Maneuver, first! And if that doesn’t work, you walk away and pretend like you never saw them before. [walks behind the clam] Like this! Ready, clam? [grabs the clam, tries to lift it, sprains his back, and screams in pain] Patrick: Well, SpongeBob, I think I might go catch a movie. SpongeBob: Hey, what about the clam? Patrick: What clam? I've never seen that clam before in my life. </poem>

114b: Ditchin'

Mermaid Man: And remember kids, stay on the path of EEE-vil!

122a: Chum Bucket Supreme

Plankton: Have you seen this, seen this, seen my genius, genius, genius, genius!

<poem> Brain Patrick 1: Forget about what that word means! There's a fire breaking out in the language lobes! We need to get outta here! Brain Patrick 2: The door's jammed! Brain Patrick 1: Push harder! </poem>

<poem> Patrick: It's about your sign. These words make my head sad. Patrick's head: I don't get it! Patrick: It's okay, little fella, I don't either. </poem>

Patrick: Chum is Fum!

Patrick: I found the problem. Your potty has a shocky thing in it.

Hockey Player: What was that part about doodoo dunderheads, eh?

Season 7

127b: I Heart Dancing

SpongeBob: Who put you on the planet? EUGHHH!

Season 8

170a: Free Samples

<poem> Karen: What do I owe the excessive volume of this giggling? Plankton: You may thank my new and original idea, darling. Free samples! Karen: New and original, my exhaust fan. </poem>

170b: Home Sweet Rubble

<poem> SpongeBob: You're just in time to lend a hand, Squidward! Squidward: Lend a hand? No! [Patrick grabs Squidward and stretches him across the house] </poem>

<poem> Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, what are you doing here? You were supposed to be at work two hours ago! [cuts to Krusty Krab] Fish 1: Hello? Anybody here? Hello?! Do you guys know how to make a Krabby Patty? Fish 2: No, but I do know how to open a cash register! </poem>

Season 9

201a: Sandy's Nutmare

<poem> Sandy: My tree is dying! Patrick: Good. We can use the wood. *takes out axe* </poem>

Season 10

210a: Life Insurance

Patrick: Zap me with your pain juice!

Season 11

236a: Call the Cops

<poem> Old Man Jenkins: Hello! Old Man Jenkins: [again, after being thrown onto shelf] Hello! Various Old People: Hello! </poem>